If the British Royal family, and most of all Charles, had known that Harry tended towards depression and anxiety (and I think after Diana's death it was clear), they should have made it possible for him to avoid the military! It was bound to enhance the anxiety (including the worrying about his status in the family) and lead to PTSD, I think. The idea that joining the military was good for him was a stupid idea which seriously backfired. Of course, there was some sort of family tradition and Harry wanted and enjoyed it, but now they have to cope with the outcome. Meghan and his love for public exposure covered as "therapy" make sure it is bad. But nothing more than they deserve.
Harry did not have the grades or, indeed, the necessary qualifications to go to university and, as a prince, he would not be expected to do a vocational apprenticeship and take up a career in a trade. Becoming an army officer, in my opinion, was the only "respectable" career for a person in his social position who was not qualified enough to do anything else (in fact, he barely had the minimum qualifications to get into Sandhurst and, if he were not a prince, might have been turned down there also).
On top of that, joining the military as an active-duty officer was a common career path for spares in the Royal Family, so it looked natural. And Harry was a problematic teenager, who was drinking and doing drugs as a 17-year-old. His family and maybe Harry himself probably thought that the army would straighten him out and install a sense of direction and discipline in his life. In fact, that is a common expectation among people who join the army and their families, and we often hear people who served repeating that.
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