Diana and Sarah's Relationship

[sirhon11234]

What I don't understand about Fergie is that her husband loved her dearly unlike Diana, why ruine that and your reputation by sleeping with another and getting your toe sucked. She lost her HRH and husband due to her stupid choices.

 

[TheTruth]

What I don't understand about Fergie is that her husband loved her dearly unlike Diana, why ruine that and your reputation by sleeping with another and getting you to sucked. She lost her HRH and husband due to her stupid choices.

There must have been something going wrong to lead to divorce. Sarah wanted to be with Andrew every day. Since he was a military, it was definitely impossible for him to fulfill her desire. Like Diana, she probably saw the good sides and denied seeing what they really wanted, what they really craved for : attention.

 

[sirhon11234]

But whats different between Sarah and Diana is that Andrew truly loved his wife Charles didn't love Diana the way he loves Camilla. And yes it must have been lonly for her when Andrew was away but when he came back he was there for her. I do like Fergie but I don't understand her.

 

[pinkie40]

There must have been something going wrong to lead to divorce. Sarah wanted to be with Andrew every day. Since he was a military, it was definitely impossible for him to fulfill her desire. Like Diana, she probably saw the good sides and denied seeing what they really wanted, what they really craved for : attention.

I don't think we will fully ever know who was more to blame in the breakup of the marriage but Fergie could have balanced work with "play" a bit more discreetly. She had many duties as a popular Duchees of York, but when she became a tad to pompous and seen by the public to accept to many "freebies", the press coverage became vicious.

I believe Sarah felt she could do as she pleased a little too much. Even Diana was demure and "shy" in her initial phase of royal life... Sarah jumped in with a bit too much gusto...but that's the personality that Prince Andrew adored.

I believe even Prince Charles bemoaned to Diana "Why can't you be more like Fergie!"

 

[ysbel]

But whats different between Sarah and Diana is that Andrew truly loved his wife Charles didn't love Diana the way he loves Camilla. And yes it must have been lonly for her when Andrew was away but when he came back he was there for her. I do like Fergie but I don't understand her.

Sarah was like Diana in that she needed the someone she loved to be with her and not posted overseas somewhere. Supposedly Diana's affair with James Hewitt broke up when he was posted overseas and at that point Diana felt she was getting nothing out of the relationship. Neither lady was happy burning a candle for a faraway love.

 

[Russophile]

Sarah has always been insecure about herself and that floated over into her relationship and marriage with Andrew. Though she KNEW he was military and would be posted overseas, she couldn't control herself enough to be a good miliatary wife. Her insecurities got the best of her. The media didn't help and she craved attention/food to make herself feel better. So. . . she indulged in attention and food.

 

[ysbel]

Sarah has always been insecure about herself and that floated over into her relationship and marriage with Andrew. Though she KNEW he was military and would be posted overseas, she couldn't control herself enough to be a good miliatary wife. Her insecurities got the best of her. The media didn't help and she craved attention/food to make herself feel better. So. . . she indulged in attention and food.

That situation is unfortunately not unknown among military families however I think that another one of the members who understands the military said that Sarah had quite reasonably expected to be able to live with Andrew where he was stationed and when she wasn't allowed, it made the marriage more difficult. Elizabeth and Philip had lived together early in their marriage on a military base and the Queen later said it was one of the happiest times of her life. I don't know the rationale for why the Queen was allowed and Sarah was not but whatever the case, if Sarah expected her married life to be under one set of conditions and it turned out to follow another set of conditions, that would put a strain on the marriage. Not excusing her behavior, mind you, but just trying to understand it.

 

[Russophile]

That situation is unfortunately not unknown among military families

Indeed, I looked up military.com and they have a "Dear Abby" section. Many, many letters, "Dear Thus and such, I'm having an affair while my husband is stationed over seas. . ."
Sad, sad, sad.

 

[pinkie40]

I believe Sarah was quite aware of Andrew's duty...and she had now had new duties herself. What she failed to comprehend was not only was she married to Andrew but to the Royal Family business and her personal liberties became restricted as a result. London is one of the most exciting cities on the globe and it was a bit restricted when she was not able to partake of all the entertainment available around the clock,

I don't think Andrew had the maturity or emotional depth to help his wife with these issues as he had known no life any different than his own.

 

[Russophile]

You know, Andrew really stuck by her through everything. If it were me, I wouldn't. But then again, he's living in a different situation than me.

 

[ysbel]

What she failed to comprehend was not only was she married to Andrew but to the Royal Family business and her personal liberties became restricted as a result. London is one of the most exciting cities on the globe and it was a bit restricted when she was not able to partake of all the entertainment available around the clock,

Sarah wasn't that much of a fan of the endless London nightlife scene before she met Andrew. I think she had a steady boyfriend for awhile and she basically hung around the horsey set. She was a lot more comfortable in this environment that Diana was which is why the Royal Family liked her so much more at first. The horsey set doesn't necessarily party around the clock in London and seek endless entertainment.

I think you make a good point about Sarah overestimating her ability to cope but I remember at the time that The Royal Family was purposely trying to loosen up and become more modern with letting Fergie into the family. So if Sarah thought she would be able to cope more than she was, I think the Royal Family equally thought it would be able to loosen up more than it actually could.

 

[Russophile]

Sarah was seeing Paddy-what's-his-face before Andrew and the guy wasn't committing and flirting with everything around him which didn't help her self-esteem either. In a way it was the jet-set lot at well, they skiied at Klosters, and hung around with "the horsey-set" with polo, hunting, and what not.
It takes a lot of money to go skiing on a regular basis here in the States. And horses aren't cheap.

 

[ysbel]

Sarah was seeing Paddy-what's-his-face before Andrew and the guy wasn't committing and flirting with everything around him which didn't help her self-esteem either. In a way it was the jet-set lot at well, they skiied at Klosters, and hung around with "the horsey-set" with polo, hunting, and what not.
It takes a lot of money to go skiing on a regular basis here in the States. And horses aren't cheap.

Oh I'm not saying that Sarah wasn't hanging around a wealthy crowd. You have to have money to be in the horsey set. But she wasn't hanging around the nightly crowd that haunted London nightclubs.

The horsey set isn't the same crowd, generally, that likes to party late amid the lights and nightlife in London. Even avid skiiers are early to bed and early to rise because the best snow on the slopes are before the rest of the crowds get on the slopes. These sports can be physically demanding so they're not liable to attract the Paris Hilton types that like the nightclubs.

I never accused any of the Royals of not having wealthy pastimes. Horses, skiing have been pretty much apart of their social scene for a long time. But until now, the excessive nighttime clubbing hasn't been a part of their lifestyle. Now things are changing.

 

[MARG]

I think that any sort of friendship between Diana and Sarah was doomed to failure. Sarah was always compared, in extremely unfavourable terms, to Diana. I don't think I will ever forget the Television commentator explaining how her wedding dress was designed to "camoflage her big bottom, a problem that Diana Princess of Wales of course does not have!". All that while the poor woman was still walking up the aisle, for heavens sake!

 

[Russophile]

These sports can be physically demanding so they're not liable to attract the Paris Hilton types that like the nightclubs.

Paris Hilton couldn't ski her way off the bunny slopes!

Diana and Sarah were just different personality types. I have friends that are completely opposite to me. As long as you respect their opinions and you have a good time together, you can have a terrific, lasting friendship. But there was jealousy on both sides and that didn't help.

 

[TheTruth]

I love pictures where we can see both of them. It's most of the time happy ones.

Diana & Sarah
Diana & Sarah
Diana & Sarah

 

[antonieta]

I read on a portuguese magazine today "NOVA GENTE" that Sarah says she and Diana were very good friends, and that she felt sorry for not having the opportunity of say good-bye to Diana because at the time of Diana's accident they didn´t speak to each other.

 

[TheTruth]

I read on a portuguese magazine today "NOVA GENTE" that Sarah says she and Diana were very good friends, and that she felt sorry for not having the opportunity of say good-bye to Diana because at the time of Diana's accident they didn´t speak to each other.

They did share many things and since both divorced they probably supported each other in difficult times. If the press and the rivalry they've created between her hadn't been so bad, I'm sure their friendship would have lasted longer. I don't think hatred took place in their feelings but it was more like a ruthless competition after their row.

While making some research on Sarah, I came across a terrible article saying that the Duchess had conveyed to Madame Vasso many intimate details about Diana's lovelife. Of course she didn't talk against her will then but she wasn't aware that the psychic healer would reveal everything in her book : Fergie: The Very Private Life of the Duchess of York. I think this "unwilled" betrayal actually broke the ladies' friendship. From what I've read in the article, the content was really, really embarrassing. I have the address of the article but I'm not sure members here would like to read this piece of garbage.

 

[pinkie40]

While I believe the person Sarah has become in recent years is more enlightened and is decently discreet about the people she cares about, I am sure the person Sarah was "back then" thrived on the lack of discretion and the attention she could get from others from talking about members of the RF to people not totally trustworthy to remain silent.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

They did share many things and since both divorced they probably supported each other in difficult times. If the press and the rivalry they've created between her hadn't been so bad, I'm sure their friendship would have lasted longer. I don't think hatred took place in their feelings but it was more like a ruthless competition after their row.

While making some research on Sarah, I came across a terrible article saying that the Duchess had conveyed to Madame Vasso many intimate details about Diana's lovelife. Of course she didn't talk against her will then but she wasn't aware that the psychic healer would reveal everything in her book : Fergie: The Very Private Life of the Duchess of York. I think this "unwilled" betrayal actually broke the ladies' friendship. From what I've read in the article, the content was really, really embarrassing. I have the address of the article but I'm not sure members here would like to read this piece of garbage.

The betrayals and backstabbing went both ways, apparently. Tina Brown in her book "The Diana Chronicles" that was released last summer says it was Diana who alerted the paparrazzi that Sarah was vacationing in the South of France with that awful bald headed guy...John Bryant..the so-called "financial advisor and that's how the infamous toe-sucking pictures were made public.

It's really very sad. These young women wasted so much time being insecure and jealous of one another. They could have and should have helped one another so much more.

 

[TheTruth]

The betrayals and backstabbing went both ways, apparently. Tina Brown in her book "The Diana Chronicles" that was released last summer says it was Diana who alerted the paparrazzi that Sarah was vacationing in the South of France with that awful bald headed guy...John Bryant..the so-called "financial advisor and that's how the infamous toe-sucking pictures were made public.

It's really very sad. These young women wasted so much time being insecure and jealous of one another. They could have and should have helped one another so much more.

Well, I guess popularity doesn't help to stay yourself in that kind of situation. I believe both did crazy things they wouldn't have done living in an "average" life. It's just so bad that this friendship was ruined because of competition for media attention. But I'm sure of is that what Sarah felt in the abbey while Diana's coffin passed by would have been the exact feeling Diana would have shared if it had been Sarah who had died in Paris.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

Well, I guess popularity doesn't help to stay yourself in that kind of situation. I believe both did crazy things they wouldn't have done living in an "average" life. It's just so bad that this friendship was ruined because of competition for media attention. But I'm sure of is that what Sarah felt in the abbey while Diana's coffin passed by would have been the exact feeling Diana would have shared if it had been Sarah who had died in Paris.

I completely agree...I also think-or hope-that given time they would have mended their relationship because they went thru so much together!

One of the many sad stories I read about that terrible night of the accident was that Sarah kept calling Diana on her cellphone over and over again, not realizing that her former sister in law was dying or dead. Sarah wanted to fly to her side immediately.....

 

[sirhon11234]

I read that a couple of weeks before her death Diana told her friends that she was planning to give Fergie a call.

 

[Warren]

I read that a couple of weeks before her death Diana told her friends that she was planning to give Fergie a call.

I don't mean to make this piece of gossip or hearsay (or fact) into an issue, but we shouldn't try and gild the lily. The uncomfortable reality is that Diana was snubbing Sarah in the same manner that she was snubbing her mother. Whether she "planned" to give her a call or not isn't the point. In those "couple of weeks", Diana never found time to call.

 

[Duchess]

diana's treatment of some people just goes to show how brutal she could be in private. if the toe sucking story was the result of diana leaking information to the media then she's not the kind of friend i'd ever want. at the same time it's sad because it shows just how badly she needed help.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

She could be incredibly kind and compassionate toward people she did not know well, but to the people that were closest to her it was quite another story.

 

[Penny Lane]

I got the impression form Tina Brown's book that Paul Burrell was possesive about Diana-which is no revelation you can see it in his interviews but he seemed to encourage distance from Fergie and Diana's mother and most of the people she had a longterm relationship with.Now that is not to say Diana couldn't make up her own mind she had a habbit of purging people from her life when something they said or did something that rubbed her the wrong way.I would like to believe that had Diana lived she would have reconciled with at least some of the people she was on the outs with given that their children were cousins it would have been nice for Dian and Fergie to be friends again.
I don't excuse Diana throwing Fergie to the press when it suited her but had alot of good qualties along with a few bad ones.I don't think Fergie showed very good judgement covorting with Bryan either so she's not blameless on this.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

I COMPLETELY agree with your assessment of the Diana/Sarah relationship and I read Tina Brown's book and I also concur with your opinion of Paul Burrell. In the early days after the Princess's death I felt so sad for him, but the more I learned about him the creepier I found him. I think Diana was so isolated and lonely and paranoid that she tended to latch on to and trust the wrong people. She had dreadful taste in men(as did Sarah, with the exception of Prince Andrew)

 

[Russophile]

diana's treatment of some people just goes to show how brutal she could be in private. if the toe sucking story was the result of diana leaking information to the media then she's not the kind of friend i'd ever want. at the same time it's sad because it shows just how badly she needed help.

Sarah shouldn't have been getting her toes sucked by a man other than her husband in the first place, then she wouldn't have been in that situation!

 

[Moonmaiden23]

That is absolutely true. It's one of the dumbest things Sarah ever did. BUT..

It was not up to her sister-in-law,her so called friend, to rat her out(if Tina Brown's book is correct that she did)

Diana at that point had so many skeletons in her own closet that it boggles the mind. Unlike Sarah, she was just too clever to get caught.

But she had way more affairs than Sarah did during her marriage!