Death & Funeral of Ari Behn: December 25, 2019/January 3, 2020

[Moonmaiden23]

did this actually happen?! how embarrasing for ML. not sure why she doesn't put a stop to this.

Yes it did happen, and his exact comments are in the Martha Louise thread.

To the always helpful wartenburg I did not accuse the Shaman of criminal activity. I stated, quite succinctly I believe that he is a controversial figure whose presence would detract attention from the purpose of the gathering.

If the Behn family or the three young daughters call the guy and plead for/demand his presence...then I will stand corrected.

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

It´s not for us to decide who will attend this funeral or who will not. MLs boyfriend is not a criminal (I can almost hear some voices now claiming he was one.... Legally he is not!). So let´s just wait and see...
Märtha being in grief, in shock etc. is only natural. She was always a highly emotional person - too emotional, publicly, in many cases in my opinion if you would ask me. Often she started to cry during interviews or speeches when there was nothing really to cry about - but well, everyone is different. So, those who ask themselves if she will grieve "properly", she definitely will. And to one poster claiming she will probably appear in fuchsia pink at the funeral I can only say, no, she will definitely wear black....!

I wonder how this will work out for the girls, who will need various kind of support for years to come and if their mother, who is very special emotionally, to put it this way, can give this support. They need emotional stability now more than anything else.

I'd say the travel the world days with the shaman are over but who knows with ML.

 

[Denville]

did this actually happen?! how embarrasing for ML. not sure why she doesn't put a stop to this.

Presumably she does not mind...

 

[Blog Real]

I wonder how this will work out for the girls, who will need various kind of support for years to come and if their mother, who is very special emotionally, to put it this way, can give this support. They need emotional stability now more than anything else.

I'd say the travel the world days with the shaman are over but who knows with ML.

Losing a parent in childhood is always a difficult situation to overcome and can be traumatic. It forever changes the child's life. Martha Louise's daughters will need a lot of support and stability in the coming years.

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

Yes, indeed. 'easy' is not the right word but it might be easier to accept if a parent passed because of a visible ailing, eg cancer, it's something you can comprehend. But taking your own life, a lot of questions will be unanswered, especially if there is no note left behind for the family.
I guess we'll see if Ari left a note trying to explain his actions, as far as I know in Germany suicide notes have to be registered with the coroner so it becomes public knowledge if there was a note (not the content of course).

 

[Muhler]

Yes, indeed. 'easy' is not the right word but it might be easier to accept if a parent passed because of a visible ailing, eg cancer, it's something you can comprehend. But taking your own life, a lot of questions will be unanswered, especially if there is no note left behind for the family.
I guess we'll see if Ari left a note trying to explain his actions, as far as I know in Germany suicide notes have to be registered with the coroner so it becomes public knowledge if there was a note (not the content of course).

Slightly different in Norway I believe.

The police will of course investigate his death and based on their findings and a possible autopsy they will file a report with the conclusion: Suicide.
The report will be filed in one of the state archives with very restricted access, as is usual in such cases. The restricted access will last around 100 years. To ensure there are no living relatives around when they are opened for public viewing.
A standard death certificate is issued and only those who are deemed relevant may have a look at the police files - including a suicide note. If there is one.

As such I doubt the actual cause of death and any specific details will be made public.

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

I know from my paramedic friend that the practice is not so easy sometimes, very often, and as it seems in case of Ari too, police and/or paramedics are first on the scene. Police take the note first and the relatives will only see afterwards what can cause anger and confusion. Sometimes a note can save lives, a while ago my friend was called to a house where a guy sealed the bathroom to die of carbon monoxide poisoning and put a note in the living room for his family where he warned them and asked to call authorities to open the door.
Another example where a suicide is meticulously planned and no sudden irrational act.

 

[norwegianne]

NRK’s news channel is in talks with the family about having the funeral transmitted on television.

I think the funeral shouldn’t be transmitted. That the girls should be able to have some privacy in the church. When Princess Astrid’s husband died - the media was not allowed in the church from the wishes of the family, but they covered the outside.

 

[maria-olivia]

I am sorry , Posters will be angry with my thread but to me :
A Father of 3 Children , loved by his parents and family , who decides to commit suicide on Christmas day is not a Hero.
Candles everywhere as for HM King Olav... King Olav gave his life to his Country he served as a King.

Mr Erling Lorentzen and Mr Johan Ferner husbands of Norvegian Princesses were Commander of the order of St Olav. Ari received any norvegien order but a Dutch one , he wore.

When Princess Raghnild and Mr Johan Ferner passed away , normal funerals without pathos .

Ari's Funerals will take place in the Cathedral who may have 900 people. I believe they wlll be more outside !

May Princess Martha Louise Angels take care of 3 young girls whose parents were not that much at home for personal reasons.

 

[carlota]

NRK’s news channel is in talks with the family about having the funeral transmitted on television.

I think the funeral shouldn’t be transmitted. That the girls should be able to have some privacy in the church. When Princess Astrid’s husband died - the media was not allowed in the church from the wishes of the family, but they covered the outside.

i agree it shouldn't. this is no state funeral, and his death was a suicide - it is not right to televise it.

 

[principessa]

My grandmother took also her life at the age of 78. At the time of her suicide I was 10 years old. On the day she died (she took pills for sleeping and against pain) there was a huge crowd of police in our house. For me it was the most frightened situation as the police asked my parents about the reason of the suicide. I feared that my parents had to leave me. After her funeral there were many rumours in my hometown about her death. It was so hard for me to hear the false reasons why she died.

These experiences I hope Maud, Leah and Emma will never make. And I hope they will get the best support and always have some people to talk about this terrible situation.

 

[norwegianne]

Carter Bays of "How I met your mother"'s story about how he met Ari:

https://twitter.com/x/status/1210370780761968640

 

[Blog Real]

But is there a date and place already set for the funeral? or are they just rumors?

 

[Osipi]

I, also, hope that the funeral is not televised and is kept as private as possible for the sake of Ari's daughters and close family members that are struggling to cope with their grief.

I can understand that a lot of people did care about Ari and want to honor and remember him and mourn his untimely passing but to present it to the public in a glaring way by being televised, it could make those that really are feeling the grief deeply and emotionally feel like they're on display in what should be private moments of grieving and processing the loss they've recently experienced.

The question really is, for me, how many people in the general public would tune into the funeral, if televised, simply for the reason to see if Mr. Verrett shows up or for what Martha Louise is wearing and how she's coping emotionally or would they genuinely tune in to mourn the passing of Mr. Behn? As I'm not overly familiar with the life and times of Ari Behn, I'm just wondering.

 

[norwegianne]

But is there a date and place already set for the funeral? or are they just rumors?

As mentioned earlier:
The funeral will be on January 3, in Oslo Cathedral.

https://www.vg.no/nyheter/innenriks/..._content=row-1

At 13:00

The bishop of Oslo will officiate.

https://www.dagbladet.no/kjendis/slik-blir-ari-behns-bisettelse/71970511

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

Terrible idea and no reason at all to televise this funeral other than sick sensationalism.

 

[Hans-Rickard]

NRK’s news channel is in talks with the family about having the funeral transmitted on television.

I think the funeral shouldn’t be transmitted. That the girls should be able to have some privacy in the church. When Princess Astrid’s husband died - the media was not allowed in the church from the wishes of the family, but they covered the outside.

I agree that it shouldn’t be broadcasted live for the sake of the children.

They could do like they did at Friso’s funeral in Netherlands and film when the guests arrive/departs the church and having just one camera inside at the organ loft to record a small part of the service with no close up of anyone and no frontal view of the family.

But they shouldn’t broadcast it live, like if it was the funeral of the King or the Queen. That would be wrong in my opinion. The grieving teenage children will be present and should be allowed to have some privacy.

I am sorry , Posters will be angry with my thread but to me :
A Father of 3 Children , loved by his parents and family , who decides to commit suicide on Christmas day is not a Hero.
Candles everywhere as for HM King Olav... King Olav gave his life to his Country he served as a King.

Mr Erling Lorentzen and Mr Johan Ferner husbands of Norvegian Princesses were Commander of the order of St Olav. Ari received any norvegien order but a Dutch one , he wore.

When Princess Raghnild and Mr Johan Ferner passed away , normal funerals without pathos .

Ari's Funerals will take place in the Cathedral who may have 900 people. I believe they wlll be more outside !

May Princess Martha Louise Angels take care of 3 young girls whose parents were not that much at home for personal reasons.

The difference is if i understand it correctly when reading the Norwegian media, is that the Royal Family is not at all involved in arranging this funeral. As far as i understand, it is entirely the Behn-Family (his parents, siblings and possibly daughters). I don’t think the King is involved at all in planning it.

If he was, i don’t think it would have been in Oslo Cathedral. More likely a private family service at the Chapel at the Royal Palace or at Aakershus Castle wich in my opinion would have been better to protect the children.

But now the Behn-family has decided that it should be at the cathedral. I just hope that NRK won’t broadcast it live for the sake of the children - but it seems like they want to

 

[MidwestMom]

Princess Diana's funeral was televised, but the faces of the close family were not shown during the service. We saw the family entering and leaving the Abbey and that was all. It can be done respectfully.

 

[wartenberg7]

did this actually happen?! how embarrasing for ML. not sure why she doesn't put a stop to this.

Perhaps....love...?!

I agree that it shouldn’t be broadcasted live for the sake of the children.

They could do like they did at Friso’s funeral in Netherlands and film when the guests arrive/departs the church and having just one camera inside at the organ loft to record a small part of the service with no close up of anyone and no frontal view of the family.

But they shouldn’t broadcast it live, like if it was the funeral of the King or the Queen. That would be wrong in my opinion. The grieving teenage children will be present and should be allowed to have some privacy.

The difference is if i understand it correctly when reading the Norwegian media, is that the Royal Family is not at all involved in arranging this funeral. As far as i understand, it is entirely the Behn-Family (his parents, siblings and possibly daughters). I don’t think the King is involved at all in planning it.
If he was, i don’t think it would have been in Oslo Cathedral. More likely a private family service at the Chapel at the Royal Palace or at Aakershus Castle wich in my opinion would have been better to protect the children.

But now the Behn-family has decided that it should be at the cathedral. I just hope that NRK won’t broadcast it live for the sake of the children - but it seems like they want to

I agree with you on that one, but if it would be televised, I don´t think it is because he was husband of the Princess, but because he was a public figure, an author, in his own right with lots of connections to all sorts of social and cultural scenes in Norway and maybe scandinavia as a whole.

Yes it did happen, and his exact comments are in the Martha Louise thread.

To the always helpful wartenburg I did not accuse the Shaman of criminal activity. I stated, quite succinctly I believe that he is a controversial figure whose presence would detract attention from the purpose of the gathering.

If the Behn family or the three young daughters call the guy and plead for/demand his presence...then I will stand corrected.

Always trying to help ...! I know you didn´t say he was a criminal, but when reading most posts here one gets the feeling he was and for that reason he should not appear at this funeral even none of us knows about their relationship... In that regard (no matter what I think about it personally) I still think all of us can have an opinion, but in the end it will be up to Ari`s family and those being invited if they go to this funeral or not.

 

[ImKevin]

I’m not getting into a debate such as this one on this thread, however I would advise posters to read all, and think clearly before attacking other members for their opinions.

Your right and I apologize to Osi for attacking the way I did . I should've read further before responding and never attacked a fellow member for there opinion as I dont like doing such a thing. Suicide is a very important issue here and so a lot of past experiences and emotions tends to be highand I should have engaged ina more respectful manner.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

NRK’s news channel is in talks with the family about having the funeral transmitted on television.

I think the funeral shouldn’t be transmitted. That the girls should be able to have some privacy in the church. When Princess Astrid’s husband died - the media was not allowed in the church from the wishes of the family, but they covered the outside.

Oh no...!! I do hope the Behn family will veto this. There is no reason to broadcast what is really a personal family tragedy.

Why??!!

 

[HereditaryPrincess]

Thank you to everyone's kind words in reaction to my post and I'm so sorry to anyone else who has experienced this - especially C4A and Sister Morphine. My condolences to you both.

In regards to television; I hope the funeral is kept private or at least done in a way that's not too intrusive if it has to be publicised.

That's not only incorrect, it's very also a very harmful stereotype to perpetuate. The majority of all suicides are rooted in mental illnesses such as depression. You don't become depressed of your own volition, it's not a choice you make. It's an illness that so happens to majorly affect the risk of suicide.

While it makes me happy that a handful of people on here seemingly have had the fortune not to be directly affected by depression, I really would also wish that the same people would then have the decency to refrain from talking out of their asses about a subject they clearly have neither professional nor firsthand knowledge of.

Thank you. I was disappointed but not surprised this is the discussion we are having so soon after Ari's suicide. It shouldn't be a discussion we'd have to have at all but it's particularly tasteless to do so when the tragic event only occurred less than a week ago. The sheer ignorance and refusal of sympathy of some of the posts in this thread doesn't give me hope that mental health will lose the stigma attached to it by those who haven't suffered. And if someone has had experiences with mental health and suicide but still feel that it's selfish and cowardly, I'm even more disappointed - this should be all the more reason to be sympathetic and understanding.

 

[Muhler]

I believe it is inevitable that the funeral will be covered live on TV.

It is after all such a big story in Norway that it must be considered of public interest.
And however strenuous it will be for the family, I'm sure the NRK, a public network, will cover the event with as much respect for the bereaved as possible, especially the children. - Otherwise the public will crucify them.
I also doubt the Norwegian press will show close-ups of grieving children - unless of course they perform some act where they are in focus - for the same reason. They will not be rewarded by the public for being too intrusive.

Someone asked why people would want to watch this funeral on TV. Well, IMO for the exact same reasons as why we are discussing Ari Behn's suicide and the reactions to it here: General interest.

I happen to be at work, when the funeral takes place but I don't intend to watch it anyway. Ari Behn is after all not that important to me. Had it been say Countess Alexandra in DK who had died under similar circumstances I would have watched at least a summary, because that is closer and involving the DRF.

 

[An Ard Ri]

Oh no...!! I do hope the Behn family will veto this. There is no reason to broadcast what is really a personal family tragedy.

Why??!!

I completely agree and why put the extra strain on his 3 daughters after the horrible Christmas they've had.

I wonder who's idea it was?

 

[Zaira]

Oh dear...I truly see no reason to have this funeral televised. I understand that Ari had a public profile separate from his role as a member of the NRF (or former) but I still do not think that makes a super public funeral the way to go.

 

[tommy100]

I'd love to know if, hand on heart, the networks would be interested in broadcasting this if they didn't think possibly the King & Queen, certainly Haakon & MM, ML and possibly some Swedish and Danish royals would be turning up.

They are doing him & his family a disservice IMO by pretending otherwise. Better he has the funeral he would have had if royals were not turning up and let his work and his friendships make their merit.

 

[Hans-Rickard]

I'd love to know if, hand on heart, the networks would be interested in broadcasting this if they didn't think possibly the King & Queen, certainly Haakon & MM, ML and possibly some Swedish and Danish royals would be turning up.

They are doing him & his family a disservice IMO by pretending otherwise. Better he has the funeral he would have had if royals were not turning up and let his work and his friendships make their merit.

That’s my opinion too. I simply cannot imagine that many norwegians think it would be right to have this funeral on live television ! The journalists are only interested in covering the attending royals and to see if M L’s boyfriend is there...
Let’s be honest, It wouldn’t be much about Ari. It would be about the spectacle that comes with a live broadcast ! Maybe i am wrong but i cannot imagine that there is much public demand to see this. Rather the opposite to protect the children...

NRK should not go inside here and allow this funeral to be about remembering Ari and his rich life as an author, painter, family father and friend. Not just his life as a member of the royal family.

 

[kalnel]

Just curious: Has the Scandinavian and European press been playing up the connection between Ari's death and Kevin Spacey's weird video about "killing with kindness." I've seen several U.S.-based stories about it. Some seem to be looking for a conspiracy (or at least a conspiracy theory).

 

[JR76]

Just curious: Has the Scandinavian and European press been playing up the connection between Ari's death and Kevin Spacey's weird video about "killing with kindness." I've seen several U.S.-based stories about it. Some seem to be looking for a conspiracy (or at least a conspiracy theory).

I haven't seen anyone trying to make a connection between Ari's suicide and Kevin Spacey. What's the reason for American media trying to make a connection between the two?

 

[rominet09]

I haven't seen anyone trying to make a connection between Ari's suicide and Kevin Spacey. What's the reason for American media trying to make a connection between the two?

Ari had told previously that Kevin touched him inappropriately below the table (and below too !) when they met.