Death & Funeral of Ari Behn: December 25, 2019/January 3, 2020

[Countessmeout]

Durek posting that he is making no comment, without realising that is a comment seems to sum him up IMO.

Anyway, it was a truly heart warming yet wonderfully touching service.

He knows it's a comment.....he said the only comment I will make is that his heart goes out to them.

He has likely been pestered by medusa and on Instagram to make a statement. And so he said this is what you are getting, that's it, now leave it alone.

I don't see anything wrong with how he has handled any of it.

 

[Tatiana Maria]

If the link does not work for anyone, the comment reads: "Out of deep respect for Märtha and Ari's children, I will not comment on the passing of their father, not now or later, other than to say I am so incredibly sad for their loss".

 

[Lady Daly]

After reading through this thread and having viewed Ari Behn's funeral service I'm left thinking if the "Shaman" had not entered Martha Louise's life would Ari still be alive. I'm creeped out by the guy. I hope Martha Louise focuses on her family and lets this creep permanently fade away.

 

[Sister Morphine]

After reading through this thread and having viewed Ari Behn's funeral service I'm left thinking if the "Shaman" had not entered Martha Louise's life would Ari still be alive. I'm creeped out by the guy. I hope Martha Louise focuses on her family and lets this creep permanently fade away.

As much as I think the "shaman" is a charlatan and a fraud, blaming him for Ari's suicide isn't right, IMO. According to everything that's come out in the wake of his death, it seems like it was his divorce from M-L that triggered his final battle with depression, not her new relationship. Whether she moved on to be with someone else or was still single, he would have gone through what he did. I'm sure it wasn't easy to see her move on, especially since it sounds like he still loved her, but she's not to blame for this, and neither is her boytoy. There's no one to blame.

Depression is an insidious disease that corrupts the mind. In the wake of suicide, whether it's someone we know or someone we know of, like Ari Behn or Robin Williams, it's easy to try and find someone or something to point to as the reason it happened, but it doesn't work like that.

 

[O-H Anglophile]

As much as I think the "shaman" is a charlatan and a fraud, blaming him for Ari's suicide isn't right, IMO. According to everything that's come out in the wake of his death, it seems like it was his divorce from M-L that triggered his final battle with depression, not her new relationship. Whether she moved on to be with someone else or was still single, he would have gone through what he did. I'm sure it wasn't easy to see her move on, especially since it sounds like he still loved her, but she's not to blame for this, and neither is her boytoy.

And Ari had a girlfriend of some time as well, so it is not as if he hadn’t moved on at some level.

 

[rominet09]

I think he had the good reaction there.

 

[altagrace]

After reading through this thread and having viewed Ari Behn's funeral service I'm left thinking if the "Shaman" had not entered Martha Louise's life would Ari still be alive. I'm creeped out by the guy. I hope Martha Louise focuses on her family and lets this creep permanently fade away.

I am not a fan of the shaman but I believe this comment is out of line.

 

[Lady Daly]

Ari Behn's history of depression and the breakup of his marriage were certainly contributing factors in his suicide. I believe I had read Ari was planning to spend Christmas with ML and his children along with the Royal Family. Perhaps having to deal with the shaman was the final tipping point. Certainly we can't know.

 

[Tatiana Maria]

And Ari had a girlfriend of some time as well, so it is not as if he hadn’t moved on at some level.

Yes, and he was the first out of the two to "move on" with a new partner, as his relationship with Ebba Rysst Heilmann was confirmed before the divorce was finalized in 2017.

http://www.vg.no/rampelys/ari-behn/se-og-hoer-ari-behn-har-faatt-kjaereste/a/24082931/

 

[Osipi]

We can sit here and come up with alternative scenarios that could have made a difference but the fact remains that we will never know. Its not prudent to place blame on someone because of a scenario that could have been.

I thought Mr. Verrett's statement was kind and considerate of the family and what any one of us would have said if pressured to make some kind of statement. Those that were looking for a "shamanic" spiel in this situation were left sorely disappointed.

 

[Sister Morphine]

Ari Behn's history of depression and the breakup of his marriage were certainly contributing factors in his suicide. I believe I had read Ari was planning to spend Christmas with ML and his children along with the Royal Family. Perhaps having to deal with the shaman was the final tipping point. Certainly, we can't know.

If we "can't know," then it's highly irresponsible to speculate that M-L's new boyfriend is the reason Ari took his own life. That's a heavy burden to place on someone's shoulders, whether you like them or you don't. Ari's suicide is no one's fault. It happened, and it was awful and tragic, but it was ultimately a blameless act.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

Ari had found a lovely and devoted new girlfriend, but i can believe that he might have still been in love with his ex wife and in pain about their divorce, for which he apparently took most of the responsibility.

Both had moved on, but it had to have been painful to hear and read her rhapsodizing on social media about her "twin flame, eternal love, man who taught her what it means to truly love" etc...and of course hear about their transcendent physical intimacy together.

He might have been remembering their courtship and marriage and how giddy in love and happy they were...and how he had "ruined" it all.

How can that not have been devastating for a damaged, sensitive man like Ari?

BUT...i need to make it clear that the death of Ari Behn can not be laid at the feet of Durek Verrett or ML. Holidays are fraught with danger for depressed people and Christmas is the worst of all. The. WORST.

A healthy man in his right mind would have taken stock of all he had to make him happy...adoring daughters, loving partner, devoted and admiring friends.

The fact that her former husband saw none of that and allowed his illness to make a terrible, irreversible decision for him is not something anyone can blame on ML...or Durek.

 

[Lady Daly]

Sincere apologies if it appeared I was solely placing blame for Ari's suicide on the shaman. I spent considerable time reading through this thread and also watched the funeral which was very moving. Definitely no one knows why, however it did strike me that Ari had planned on Christmas with the family. There were pictures of the shaman with ML and the family Christmas morning before news of Ari's suicide. Regardless of my thinking the shaman is creepy, perhaps Ari would have been with the family on Christmas if not for the shaman literally in the picture. Again, we will never know, so more of a speculation than my casting any blame.

 

[Sister Morphine]

Ari had found a lovely and devoted new girlfriend, but I can believe that he might have still been in love with his ex-wife and in pain about their divorce, for which he apparently took most of the responsibility.

Both had moved on, but it had to have been painful to hear and read her rhapsodizing on social media about her "twin flame, eternal love, man who taught her what it means to truly love" etc...and, of course, hear about their transcendent physical intimacy together.

He might have been remembering their courtship and marriage and how giddy in love and happy they were...and how he had "ruined" it all.

How can that not have been devastating for a damaged, sensitive man like Ari?

BUT...i need to make it clear that the death of Ari Behn can not be laid at the feet of Durek Verrett or ML. Holidays are fraught with danger for depressed people and Christmas is the worst of all. The. WORST.

A healthy man in his right mind would have taken stock of all he had to make him happy...adoring daughters, loving partner, devoted and admiring friends.

The fact that her former husband saw none of that and allowed his illness to make a terrible, irreversible decision for him is not something anyone can blame on ML...or Durek.

I think reading garbage like that would be difficult even for someone who wasn't battling mental health issues. Some things should be kept to one's self, and the fact you're getting it better in bed than you did with a former partner is absolutely one of those things. I don't think she said that to rub his face in it or be cruel, I just think she's a total space cadet and doesn't think before she speaks.

Sincere apologies if it appeared I was solely placing blame for Ari's suicide on the shaman. I spent considerable time reading through this thread and also watched the funeral which was very moving. Definitely no one knows why, however, it did strike me that Ari had planned on Christmas with the family. There were pictures of the shaman with ML and the family Christmas morning before news of Ari's suicide. Regardless of my thinking the shaman is creepy, perhaps Ari would have been with the family on Christmas if not for the shaman literally in the picture. Again, we will never know, so more of a speculation than my casting any blame.

Yes, I would imagine it was a difficult pill to swallow, knowing your ex-wife's new boyfriend was going to be hanging around her and your children for the holidays, but from what I understand, Ari knew Durek was going to be there. I don't think it was something dumped him on at the last minute.

 

[Lady Daly]

I think reading garbage like that would be difficult even for someone who wasn't battling mental health issues. Some things should be kept to one's self, and the fact you're getting it better in bed than you did with a former partner is absolutely one of those things. I don't think she said that to rub his face in it or be cruel, I just think she's a total space cadet and doesn't think before she speaks.

Well said and in agreement with both Sister Morphine and Moonmaiden23.

 

[leidi]

What a lovely family the NRF is, they are all so close and don't fear showing affection or anything of the sort, I've always thought that Harald is a very good man, very decent and loving, the way he welcomed Marius into the family said it all to me.

Talking about Marius, you could see that he still considered Ari as an "uncle" of sorts, was really affected about the whole thing and didn't hesitate in showing up to say his goodbyes and support his family (at the end of the day those girls are his cousins even if not by blood).

 

[wartenberg7]

In a similar situation, absolutely. Alexandra – and by extension, her family – was a part of QMII's life for over a decade and continues to be so through her sons. Can't speak for HM or CG but I have no doubt that QMII (and the rest of the DRF) would extend the same compassion to all of her daughters-in-law's families in a similarly tragic situation. I mean, this is the woman who continued to work with Alexandra's new father-in-law even after Alexandra remarried. Don't necessarily think she deserves to be lumped in with HM.

Not so sure about that. In your example about Alexandra it would be a husband of one of A´s sisters...

I can imagine it the most; they are human beings just like everyone of us, and they also have feelings.

No, they´re not. Biological yes, they are indeed. But the persons I named, which I like a lot, do not always act like "everyone of us" and that´s a fact. That is neither good nor bad - it´s just the way it is.
That is why I was so impressed by the norwegian royal couple because I have never ever (and I watch Royalty since decades, since my childhood) seen a King and a Queen comforting ex-in-law´s-partners!
I just have no picture of it when it comes to some other royal families. It was never a secret that the Queen of the UK for instance had any kind of regular contact to Mark Philip´s parents or sister (not mentioning Mark´s brother-in-law...), the parents of Sophie Wessex or the Spencers (may be with the exception of Dianas father whom HM knew since she was a young woman or the Fellows, because he was her private secretary).

No comment drom Durek for the death of Ari Behn

https://www.instagram.com/p/B68ipdsgCCD/

Well, spending some time here reading, I´m sure no matter what he would write or say, he just couldn´t do right...
For some he is the Antichrist and will remain to be. Perhaps there is also some racism mixed in it - I don´t know. I personally don´t care about the guy, I do not know him and will never meet him, so who cares? But demonizing another person always says more about the person who demonizes than the one who is claimed to be a dark demon...!

 

[Amber26]

No, they´re not. Biological yes, they are indeed. But the persons I named, which I like a lot, do not always act like "everyone of us" and that´s a fact. That is neither good nor bad - it´s just the way it is.
That is why I was so impressed by the norwegian royal couple because I have never ever (and I watch Royalty since decades, since my childhood) seen a King and a Queen comforting ex-in-law´s-partners!

Than you haven’t looked good, in the Netherlands the husband of prinses Irene is treated the same way by the parents of Irene Queen Juliana and later by Queen Beatrix.
After his dead Carlos Hugo was brought back to The Netherlands and stayed for a few days on palace Noordeinde.

 

[Archduchess Zelia]

Not so sure about that. In your example about Alexandra it would be a husband of one of A´s sisters...

...Yes. And what what makes you assume QMII wouldn't want to show compassion towards her former daughter-in-law's brother-in-law in a similar situation to this?

 

[Moonmaiden23]

That's true...not to mention that the circumstances in place for a reigning monarch to "comfort an ex-partner's in laws" has not exactly been commonplace among the ruling Houses.

Without taking anything away from Harald and Sonja, their situation has been as unique as it is tragic.

 

[Alex the VI]

"Both had moved on, but it had to have been painful to hear and read her rhapsodizing on social media about her "twin flame, eternal love, man who taught her what it means to truly love" etc...and of course hear about their transcendent physical intimacy together."
I completely agree. It couldn't have been easy to read that. I would take a strong man to not be bothered by this ...

Even before Mr Behn's suicide, I always thought it was very immature and irresponsible from both, but especially from PML as she had an ex-husband and children, to flaunter the new relationship like this. Both are well in their 40's, not teens who have their first crush!

 

[ashelen]

I am glad he wasn't at the funeral!

 

[HereditaryPrincess]

"Both had moved on, but it had to have been painful to hear and read her rhapsodizing on social media about her "twin flame, eternal love, man who taught her what it means to truly love" etc...and of course hear about their transcendent physical intimacy together."
I completely agree. It couldn't have been easy to read that. I would take a strong man to not be bothered by this ...

Even before Mr Behn's suicide, I always thought it was very immature and irresponsible from both, but especially from PML as she had an ex-husband and children, to flaunter the new relationship like this. Both are well in their 40's, not teens who have their first crush!

I agree. This was the only part that didn't sit well with me from ML's statement - why feel the need to highlight you had both moved on here? The couple were already divorced, so even if it wasn't true and they still had some feelings left for each other, one would presume they were trying to "get over" each other a little otherwise they wouldn't have signed the divorce papers in the first place IMO.

 

[Alex the VI]

Me too - there is something about this guy that doesn't sit well.

PML was extraordinary during the service. Supporting her daughters, not stealing the spotlight, serene, not overly emotional but still showing grief. It couldn't have been easy for her.

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

Well, have been very busy lately, but here I am! So let's go to work and talk about Ari Mikael Behn (in my usual over-explained way of course).

Two tweets (written on Wednesday, the 25th) from the Norwegian Royal commentator, historian, author & lecturer, Oskar Aanmoen (born 1995), which I will respond to. He is ''Senior Europe Correspondent for Royal Central,'' and all his tweets are therefore in English (see his twitter-account here - link).
And while I appreciate Oscar's huge efforts in providing information about the NRF to English-speaking royal watchers, it must be said that I often take him in errors/mistakes when it comes to facts and his translations. Another thing to mention about him is that he is VERY pro-monarchy, perhaps even a bit too much at times, if that is even possible. LOL. - Which means he can exaggerate a bit when praising the royals or writing about royal events.

Oskar Aanmoen @OAanmoen
''Ari Behn's death comes as a shock to the Norwegian people.
All TV channels broadcast extra news broadcast and the newspapers have this as the main article.''
(See the tweet here - link).

My response: Yes, sat with family and friends when the news alerts from NRK, TV2 and VG started ticking in on our phones at around 21:00 PM. Completely shocked, we then turned the TV on and watched the special-news coverage, which I will go more in detail about a bit down in the post. Although it should be mentioned that it was the two TV-channels that often broadcast breaking news that went on air, not ''all'' of them!

Oskar Aanmoen @OAanmoen
''Most Norwegian newspapers have now closed the opportunity to comment below articles about Ari Behn's death.
This is done after hundreds of negative messages are published about Princess Martha's current controversial boyfriend, the American Shaman Durek Verett.''
(See the tweet here - link).

My response: Yes, VG (I give more information about that newspaper a bit down in the post) closed the opportunity to make comments in the first articles after it turned into an ugly war zone. - And they have continued to do so with most of the newer ones as well.
But whether one is a fan of the self-proclaimed shaman or not (and believe me, along with what I think is a large majority of Norwegians, I am not), be aware that this particular comment section is the Norwegian version of those in the Danish tabloid Ekstra Bladet and the Daily Mail, which means that most of the people commenting there are trolls/bullies that hate everyone and must, therefore, be taken with a LARGE pinch of salt.

Anyway, back to Oskar, because most national news-outlets here had already closed or restricted the opportunity to make comments years/months before Ari's death, so it's, therefore, wrong of him to write the stuff I bolded.

--------------------

Media-coverage of Ari's death:

The state-owned Norwegian Broadcasting Corporation (NRK).

NRK1 (Norway's largest TV-channel):
On Wednesday, the 25th: Devoted the whole regular 15-min evening news to it, which airs at 23:00 PM or later. They had NRK's Royal correspondent/commentator/expert, Kristi Marie Skrede (in her late 40s/early 50s I think; used to be quite balanced, but has in the last two years turned into what I would describe as pretty pro-monarchy in her style) and their highly respected culture-commentator, the 65-year-old Agnes Moxnes in the studio.
One can watch it here if one understands Norwegian (link).

On Thursday, the 26th: Devoted the first 12-min of the 30-min 19:00 news ''Dagsrevyen'' to it (Norway's largest news-programme, which has aired since 1958 and which was shortened from 45-min due to the holiday period). Also the main story on the 21:00 news and second story on the 23:15 news.
One can watch them here: 1 - 2 - 3

On Friday, the 27th: Still a large part of the news broadcasts, and main story on Dagsrevyen.

NRK2 (Norway's fourth-largest TV channel, which in addition to normal programming is used by NRK for breaking news):
On Wednesday, the 25th: Had two special-news broadcasts from 21:10 to 21:30 and from 22:30 to 22:45 - with Kristi Marie Skrede (mentioned above) in the studio. And one from 14:15 to 14:25 on Thursday, the 26th, also with Skrede in the studio.
One can watch them here: 1 - 2 - 3

NRK has also been dominated by it online, and has since the 25th, written around 28 articles about it.


The commercial TV 2 Group.

TV2 (Norway's second-largest TV-channel):
Full coverage on the 18:30 and 21:00 news on Thursday, the 26th (almost the entire broadcasts were devoted to it).
Also the main story on Friday, the 27th.

TV2 News Channel (Norway's only News Channel and sixth-largest TV-channel, which is considered very good for that type of channel BTW, and it has continued to grow since its launching in 2007):
On Wednesday, the 25th: Provided broad coverage with a special-news broadcast, which lasted from 21:30 to 23:30.
And despite the holiday period, they had managed to get the always knowable royal historian and author, Trond Norén Isaksen (born 1981, not a constitutional monarchist by principle, but believes the monarchy is the best solution for Norway) into the studio, who has now very much replaced their late Royal expert/commentator, Kjell Arne Totland, which one can read about in this post (link). - Plus that they spoke (by phone) to their former Royal correspondent, Anne Fredrikstad (born 1969); and the rag-mag, Se og Hør's Royal correspondent/expert, Caroline Vagle (in her early 30s I think), who despite the bad reputation of the magazine, seems pretty reliable.
The channel was also overwhelmingly dominated by it on Thursday, the 26th, when they spoke to Norén Isaksen again, several others (including a culture-commentator, a friend of Ari and a psychologist) and had reporters at the Palace Square and in Moss (Ari's hometown).

Must be a subscriber to watch it online, so no point for me posting links here.

TV2 has also been completely dominated by it online, and have since the 25th, written around 38 articles about it.


The tabloid VG. Norway's by far largest news-website with over two million daily readers and the second-largest print-newspaper.
And very pro-monarchy: Was overwhelmingly and completely dominated by it in the first two days, 10-articles in a row as the main stories during the first evening.
And since the news came in on the 25th, they have now written around 73 articles about it (yes, 73).


Aftenposten. Norway's largest print-newspaper.
Pro-monarchy, although much more balanced than VG: Was completely dominated by it in the first two days, and have since the news came in on the 25th, written around 37 articles about it.

Dominated several other national outlets as well, including the republican tabloid, Dagbladet.

And the first national print-front pages after his death (including those in the three newspapers mentioned above) were, of course, full of it.

Two other things to mention are:
1. That both the TV-channels and a lot of the articles have shown the two helplines-numbers (i.e. the Mental Health-helpline and the Church SOS crisis-line) and encouraged those struggling to call in, which has resulted in a huge increase of such calls, leading many of them to not being answered. The government has therefore now decided to give an extra 10 million NOK to it.
2. That psychologist, Atle Dyregrov (live on TV2 News Channel and to NRK) has advised parents (due to the massive media coverage) to talk to their children about Ari's suicide and suicide in general.

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

No more space to write in the above post, so let's continue here.

Reactions to his death.

From the commentators: They have branded him as one that ''opened the monarchy,'' ''changed the institution to the better,'' ''gave colour to the Royal Family,'' ''was an asset to The King,'' ''was one of Norway's biggest cultural personalities'' (would be wrong of me to write ''great'' or ''significant,'' because it wasn't meant like that), ''was an eccentric but also a realist,'' ''saw all people around him and was very caring to everyone he met,'' ''made everyone feel like they were the only person in the world,'' and ''was a role model for those struggling with mental illness, due to his openness about his own issues,'' etc., etc....

And yes, someone has made a point that the media perhaps should have said some of those things about him while he was alive, since he ''never felt good enough.'' Although it must be said that he also received praise from them throughout the years, among others from Kjell Arne Totland (the guy I talked about in the previous post). And the criticism had winded down considerably after his and Märtha's divorce. Because then they couldn't attack him as the strange pompous guy who embarrassed the RF anymore.

But anyway, back to the time after his death. Because Specialist-Psychologist for National Centre for Suicide-Research and Prevention, Fredrik Walby and General Secretary of Norway's support association for those left behind after suicide, Terese Grøm are critical of the way the media has covered Behn's death.

They said this to NRK.
Dyregrov: He believes that openness about suicide is a good thing, but that the press-coverage has been too un-nuanced and says: ''Det er det ensidige, hyllende bildet hvor man bare fokuserer på personens sterke sider. Dette blir et vakuum og man lurer på hva som egentlig skjedde.''
''It's the one-sided, praising image where one focuses only on the person's strong sides. This becomes a vacuum and one wonders what really happened.''

Grøm: Says the following about the extent of the media coverage: ''Det er problematisk fordi det kan være en smitteeffekt og fordi det blir så stort fokus på hyllesten etter et selvmord. Det har det blitt mye av nå. Det er lystenning og vakre ord, og det er fint på mange måter, men det tar samtidig bort fokuset på at selvmord er en krise man trenger hjelp til å komme ut av.''
''It's problematic because it can be a *smitteeffekt* (hmm, what should we call it in English, well, let's say *domino-effect*) and because it becomes so much focus on the tributes after a suicide. It has been much of it now. There are lighting of candles and beautiful words, and that's fine in many ways, but it also takes the focus away from the fact that suicide is a crisis that one needs help to get out of.''

Leader of The Association of Norwegian Editors, Hanna Relling Berg responded with saying ''that one can always discuss the extent of the coverage in retrospect, and whether the press managed to balance between *openness* and *bringing forth the tragicness in a suicide* (with 'a suicide,' she means generally speaking). We regard the press-coverage as respectful and balanced, and believe it's important in the future to focus on what can prevent suicide.''

The Association later went out and said that they ''had seen examples of phrases in the media after Ari's death that can contribute to a glorification of suicide.''


From the public: Huge reactions in a very positive way towards him:
*On social media.
*At the Palace Square in Oslo, where crying people have lit candles for him, telling the media that they ''have always liked him.''
*In his hometown Moss, where hundreds of people have walked in a torchlight procession to remember him.
*And in Lommedalen (where he lived 5-min from Märtha), where they opened the church. - And where neighbours told about a person who talked to them at the store and helped people carrying their groceries.

Royal Central article from Oskar Aanmoen (link):

The suicide of Princess Märtha Louise’s former husband, Ari Behn, was as a huge shock to the entire Norwegian population. Nearly all liked Ari Behn very well, and he had a special place in the heart of the Norwegian people.

Before his death: Well, although he had his admirers, I think ''nearly all'' is somewhat overstated.
After his death: Yes, he is! And IMO deservedly so!
And that's probably because many people are hearing for the first time what a nice guy he really was.
Although it should be mentioned that when NRK's news anchor, Atle Bjurstrøm and VG declares Ari as ''beloved,'' I must say that they take it a bit too far, because that is a VERY strong word! And we must remember that we are talking about a rather controversial person here.


From celebrity friends: Saying things like that ''he never understood how good a person he was,'' that he ''was an amazing friend that always saw you,'' and that they ''can't believe he is gone,'' etc., etc.


From the Prime Minister:

Dec 25:

The Prime Minister also offered her condolences: "I want to express my deepest sympathy with Ari Behn's family and bereaved in connection with his tragic death. My thoughts go out to all who loved him."

Thanks!

And in contrast to Oskar, you even bothered to make some changes after putting it through google-translate I see.
Not that easy BTW since that NRK-article is written in *New Norwegian* (English Wikipedia article - link).

Oskar @OAanmoen
''Norway's PM Erna Solberg, makes the following statement after Ari Behn's death:
I would like to express my deepest condolences to Ari Behn's family, leaving behind his tragic passing away. My thoughts go to everyone who loved him.''
(See the tweet here - link).

Whaaaaaat??? I mean pre-2018, when I myself was still a bit unsure of my English-writing-skills (which I think Oskar is as well) and just wrote it in Norwegian and put it through google translate, I still checked it before posting it.

And be also aware that Oskar's translation even found its way into one of Royal Central's articles, which was written by Editor-in-chief and owner Charlie Proctor.

But anyway, let's translate the rest of Erna Solberg's statement (which was left out by Tatiana Maria): ''He was a committed and listening person (I could have written a person who listened, but not what Solberg said) who was more concerned with listening to others than highlighting himself. He has made Norway a bit richer in opening up so that men can be a bit different than just strict A4.''

BTW, the term ''A4'' means a person who lives a perfect average life, and who does nothing one wouldn't expect from an average person.

Dec 26th: In interviews with NRK and TV2, sent her thoughts to the family and praised them for their openness around the suicide and said that the reactions to Ari's death showed that he had touched many people.

Jan 1st: Held her annual pre-recorded New Year's Address (English translation from the Government - link) where she said this about Ari:

On Christmas Day we received the sad news that The King’s former son-in-law, Ari Behn, had taken his own life.

Norway has lost an innovative artist and author. His family and friends have lost a beloved family member and good friend.

I send my warmest thoughts to all those who have lost a loved one during the last year.

It was originally taped before Christmas, but they decided to re-write/tape it after Behn's death.

And be aware that she didn't say the bolded part when she spoke, nor is it part of the Norwegian written version, so probably just to tell foreign readers of the speech (outside Norway) about who he is.

She also went on to talk about suicide and mental health in general, which she (according to herself) was supposed to do anyway.


From the President of the ''Storting'' (which is the name of Norway's Parliament), Tone Wilhelmsen Trøen:
Sent her ''deepest condolences to all those close to Ari Behn,'' and ''the warmest thoughts to his family.''

There have also been words from some of the MPs, who have praised his openness, etc.

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

Again, no more space to write in the above post, so let's continue here with a third one.

Ari's career:

A well-known person in Norway even before he became known as the boyfriend of Märtha. Debuted as an author with the short stories collection ''Trist som faen'' ("Sad as hell") in 1999, which received several favourable reviews and sold more than 30,000 copies until 2001, when the relationship with the princess became known, which in Norway is very good BTW. Afterwards, that number increased to over 100,000 sold copies.

And after that, well, he continued his writing career with mixed success.
First in 2002, when he and Märtha wrote the book ''Fra hjerte til hjerte'' (''From heart to heart''), which was about their wedding.
Then he went on to write two more Collections of Short Stories:
''Talent for lykke'' (''A talent for luck'') in 2011, which, like "Sad as hell," also received good reviews.
And ''Tiger i hagen'' (''Tiger in the garden'') in 2015.

Plus four novels:
''Bakgård'' (''Backyard'') in 2003.
''Entusiasme og raseri'' (''Enthusiasm and rage'') in 2006.
''Vivian Seving etc'' in 2009 (and yes, ''etc'' is part of the title)
And ''Inferno'' in 2018.

He also (among other things) co-hosted three travel shows on TV (one of which was awarded the prize for ''Best TV-entertainment'' at ''Gullruten'' in 2011, Norway's version of The Emmys), was a designer and painter. Yes, he sold paintings for 5.7 million NOK in 2018, which by Norwegian standards is more than VERY good.

Read more in this English Wikipedia Article (link), which IMO is pretty accurate.

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Ari's relationship with the RF:

His Majesty: My sense is that they were very fond of each other, but with them being two very different personalities and The King being the monarch, I wouldn't say it was anything more than that of a normal good father/son-in-law relationship. I mean I wouldn't describe them as very close, such as Ari and The Queen

BTW, here are two photos of them hugging in 2006: 1 - 2
And with both being known for their warm and caring sides and the fact that King Harald has NEVER been afraid to show affection in public, I wouldn't have expected anything else.

Her Majesty:

Quote from Oskar Aanmoen's Royal Central article, which is posted in the previous post:

He remained a close friend of Queen Sonja after his divorce and also had a good relationship with Princess Märtha Louise.

Yes! According to what Ari said in interviews, they found the tone right after he became part of the family in 2002 (not strange when you think about their shared interest in art), and spent time together, went to art-exhibitions, etc., something they continued with also after the divorce and up to his death (either the two of them alone or along with the children).
I love her, he would say, telling the media around her 70th Birthday in 2007 (and other times) that she was ''attentive and generous,'' and in 2012 that she often let him have it when she thought he had made mistakes, and that he had to ''admit'' that he ''almost always'' was in agreement with her assessment. LOL.
And after the divorce, he said that she ''looked out'' for him, buying candles for his new bathroom and everything. Yes, he even talked about their ''close relationship'' just a few weeks ago.

So pretty sure she's totally heartbroken right now.

And here they are, The Queen and Ari. An indomitable duo!

Photos from 2002, 2007 and 2010: 1 - 2 - 3

The CP-Family: With CP Haakon (and later also CP MM) always being ''very close'' to Märtha, and Ingrid being one of Maud's closest friends, they had, of course, a lot to do with Ari as well. And as we could read in the statement after his death, they saw him as ''a good friend, a much-loved member of the family and a fabulous uncle.''

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Fatherhood: Since he and Märtha had shared custody, the children lived with him about 50% of the time. And after what I have read/heard in the media, he was a very hands-on father who drew/painted with them (especially with Maud, who according to both Ari and The Queen is ''very good,'' hence why father and daughter were working together on three children's books).

And now they have lost him in that way, which must be almost UNBEARABLE for them!

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Controversies: Well, as one can read in the English Wikipedia article which I posted a bit earlier in the post, there was a whole lot of them.

Post from the Märtha & Durek thread:

I remember vividly the "storm" her wedding caused (at least pushed by the media...) to the then so called "scandal-author" Ari Behn, who had himself being filmed using weed on film in the presence of prostitutes...

Yes, yes!

The film was made in connection with a TV-report to portray the hidden life of Las Vegas - in the borderland between fiction and reality.

And as you probably know, it was before he started a relationship with the princess.

But his biggest problem was that he always felt he had to go out and defend Märtha, the royal family and himself publicly when they were criticized by various experts/commentators in the media. Because as he put it, he wasn't the type to just sit there and say nothing, something he said, ''could be very tiresome'' for his wife and the other royals, especially since they are used to almost never responding to what is said/written about them.

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Mental health: He suffered from depression for many years, telling Norwegian media in 2009 that he was ''more and more depressed'' and that he, therefore, probably ''was difficult to live with.'' He later told about being taken to hospital with a panic attack after the divorce and said that he blamed himself for the fact that the marriage had failed.

Poor guy! And kudos to him for talking about it.

And his best friend, the well-known photographer Per Heimly, said in an interview that Ari had a very ''tough'' year mentally throughout 2019, and that he and other friends (along with the Behn-family) had tried to help him, but that it was ''too heavy'' for him to go on.
(Not taken from the interview that LadyFinn posted BTW, although it is about much of the same.)

Physical Health: Told about pain in the body after a car accident in April 2017, which is why he didn't attend The Regent-Couple's joint 80th Birthday celebrations the following month. He explained to the police/press that a car was approaching the oncoming traffic lane and that he chose to drive in the ditch to avoid a collision. (And no, hasn't heard any rumours in the media that there was suspicion of a suicide attempt.)

Other things that plagued him was a cyst in his ear (Cholesteatoma), which gave him ''unbearable pain and panic attacks,'' he said.

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And two more things:

First: Will be back either tomorrow or in a few days time to talk about public funerals in Norway generally, and a few other things (including Ari's funeral service in Oslo Cathedral).

Second and finally: I really want to say that my heart goes out to everyone close to him, especially his three daughters, Princess Märtha Louise, his parents/siblings, HM The Queen, his girlfriend Ebba, and his closest friends.

And BTW, thanks to those who have shared their personal stories here, you really have my sympathies!

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

AGAIN, no more space to write in the above post, so let's continue here with a fourth one. LOL.

Because I just decided to also reply to a few posts:

I’m not entirely sure but I was wondering if it was Maud’s boyfriend?

That seems a reasonable explanation. He is comforting Ingrid-Alexandra on this picture - but is also next to Maud; and she looks up to him quite often. Alternatively, he could be a cousin.

According to Royal commentator, Trond Norén Isaksen; he is most likely Maud's boyfriend! Because as Isaksen said: The guy sat with her, went out of the church with her and was holding her hand.

This information and Ari's own words rather confirm that the failure of his marriage to ML was devastating for him, even though he acknowledged that he had been "impossible to live with". The sense of failure, and the loss of his role as husband and hands on father might have been the beginning of the end.

It's sort of a chicken vs.egg question...did Ari's illness cause the end of his marriage, or did the loss of that vital relationship trigger his final, severe depression?

Just speculation. It's all so frustrating and tragic to me.

Not something I would speculate on, but after what I've heard him say in interviews and stuff, I think it was a bit of both.

I recently read a blogpost from a funeral director who stated that in his experience about 70% of suicides are related to a great sense of loss (resulting in desperation); 20% of mental illness; and 10% of physical suffering. In Ari's case it seems his great sense of loss and depression coincided. That sense of loss seemed to have been both related to his marriage and to his 'status'. I found this statement by Ari especially poignant: "I am yesterday's news, even though the world has not yet been told".

Be aware that Ari was always extremely poetic! Yes, sometimes it was actually quite hard to understand what he was talking about. But I think he meant himself in the near future being dead, something we (the public) was not yet being told about.
But if we were to take that phrase literally: Well, he was not ''yesterday's news,'' he was actually as much in the media as he ever had been and had more success than he ever had during his marriage.

 

[eya]

"Ari Behns parents reveals details of their son's last days and death in a new interview: - Ari was to celebrate Christmas with the royal family, but canceled only days before. - It was Ari Behn's father, Olav, who found his son dead in Ari`s house in Lommedalen."

https://twitter.com/x/status/1216983051529527296

 

[LadyFinn]

Ari Behn will be buried to Vår Frelsers gravlund (Cemetery of Our Saviour) in Oslo at the request of his family. This confirms the family spokesperson Geir Håkonsund to VG. He also states that the family does not want to specify the time the urn is buried.
Her skal Ari Behn gravlegges – VG