Royal Wedding Vows

[Freedom]

Have any royals ever written their own wedding vows?

 

[Alexandria]

I think royals generally follow the marriage vows set out by their respective church. Original declarations of love tend to be left for the wedding speeches at the reception. Amendments, even slight ones, I think occur though.

For example, I remember the uproar over Sophie's decision/choice to cite her vows to Edward as "honour, cherish and obey." Feminists the world over declared wrote endless commentary pieces about how archaic this part of the vows were and how Sophie was not a modern woman for doing so. I think most modern brides drop the "obey" part but keep the rest of the vows.

 

[sara1981]

what about Diana,Princess of Wales and Sarah,Duchess of York's wedding vows? and Princess Anne?

I understand Countess of Wessex's vows more respectives as former Public Relations because she stills obeys to her husband and Queen lots! i dont blame her.

Sara Boyce

 

[Genevieve]

I understand Countess of Wessex's vows more respectives as former Public Relations because she stills obeys to her husband and Queen lots! i dont blame her.

Sara Boyce

As a woman I'm really surprised that you would support the "obey" part of the vow and don't "blame" Sophie for reciting that part of the vows. As a woman I was insulted and offended that Sophie chose to cite that as part of her vows.

I actually think the "obeying" part is wrong. In this day and age no adult should have to obey another adult. Especially if the other person is their husband who is supposed to be their equal partner in life and why should Sophie have to obey even the Queen? Nothing in Sophie's character or personality implies someone who would recklessly do things without considering how it would hurt or affect others such as the royal family. So why is it so important for Sophie to obey Edward and the Queen?

Obeying is a patriarchal and ancient custom so that men can dominate women and so the powerful can dominate society's lower echelons. As long as we encourage women to cite vows that include "obey" the further we push women down and don't allow them to thrive and succeed as their male counterparts. Women might as well be stricly baby-making/cooking/cleaning machines if we encourage them to "obey" rather than be the independent, thinking and productive individuals we know they are.

 

[Freedom]

I think the term 'obey' is necessary because she is marrying into a situation where she IS to serve her people, more than she is to serve herself. I don't think it is an issue of women's rights, but moreover an issue of duty.

 

[Genevieve]

I think the term 'obey' is necessary because she is marrying into a situation where she IS to serve her people, more than she is to serve herself. I don't think it is an issue of women's rights, but moreover an issue of duty.

Sophie pledged to "obey" Edward - not the entire country of Great Britian or the Queen. That is the distinction.

When Sophie and Edward were marrying, there weren't plans at the time for either of them to give up their careers: he Advent productions or her her PR company. It was only a few years later after the Sheik/Royal of the World sting did both give up their careers and become royals full time.

 

[ElisaR]

Elizabeth II chose "to obey". I'm not sure, but I think that at time of her marriage that part still was compulsory: in fact they offered the princess with the possibility of avoiding that part, because she was the future queen; but she rejected the possibility (as Queen Victoria did): maybe she wanted to be just like other women and not a privileged one. However I don't balme her in any way for not having seized the opportunity: those were other times.
About Sophie I think she just acted in an old fashioned way (in order to appear more "royal"?), but I doubt she really obeys to Edward.

 

[norwegianne]

Wasn't there something about the wedding vows of Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson as well when it came to the obey part? I seem to recall something, but I can't quite remember *what*

 

[Elspeth]

Have any royals ever written their own wedding vows?

In Church of England weddings this isn't permitted. Couples can choose prayers and readings, but the vows are part of the service. The only choice is whether the bride chooses to obey, which is optional in the 1980 updating of the marriage service.

 

[Freedom]

What happens when a nonroyal male marries a royal female? Must he obey too, or is this a term only in female vows?

 

[Elspeth]

It makes no difference to the Church of England marriage service whether one of the parties is royal or not. The form of the service is the same as for any other wedding. In the traditional service the bride had to promise to obey; in the newer form that promise is optional. There's no provision for the groom to vow to obey; he just has to vow to love, honour, and cherish.

 

[alexandra485]

what about the king and queen of Sweden? can anyone translate theirs because i can't speak or understand any Swedish.

 

[Oppie]

Re Sarah and the Duke of York (question up the thread)

She promised to obey him twice (I think she just repeated the word)

 

[Royal Fan]

How about the Romanovs

 

[windsorbrides1]

Sarah Ferguson said obey to Prince Andrew. He said it wasn't him the man "laying down the law" that they both looked at it as very much a MORAL obey. Sarah said that she wasn't one to sit meekly by or be ordered around at all.

 

[windsorbrides1]

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]The Anglican Marriage Service[/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]{From The Book Of Common Prayer 1662 edition}[/FONT]​

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DEARLY beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this company, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony; which is an honourable estate, instituted of God himself, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church: which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence and first miracle that he wrought in Cana of Galilee, and is commended in Holy Writ to be honourable among all men: and therefore is not by any to be enterprised nor taken in hand unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly; but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God, duly considering the causes for which Matrimony was ordained.

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[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]First, it was ordained for the increase of mankind according to the will of God; and that children might be brought up in the fear and nurture of the Lord and to the praise of His Holy name.

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[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Secondly, it was ordained in order that the natural instincts and affections, implanted by God, should be hallowed and directed aright; that those who are called of God to this holy estate, should continue therein in pureness of living.

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[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Thirdly, it was ordained for the mutual society, help, and comfort, that the one ought to have of the other, both in prosperity and adversity.[/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Into which holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined.

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[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Therefore, if any man can shew just cause, why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter, forever hold his peace. [/FONT]


[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]I REQUIRE and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment, why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, ye do now confess it. For be ye well assured, that so many as be coupled together otherwise than God's Word doth allow are not joined together by God; neither is their Matrimony lawful.

[/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]GROOM, Wilt thou have this Woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?

The Man shall answer, I will.

BRIDE, Wilt thou have this Man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's law in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love him, comfort him, honour, and keep him [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif](alternate ancient ceremony: obey him and serve him, love, honor and keep him) [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?

[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]The Woman shall answer, I will.

[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Who giveth this Woman to be married to this Man?

[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]I, GROOM take thee BRIDE to my wedded Wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy law; and thereto I give thee my troth (alternate ancient ceremony: plight thee my troth).

[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]I, BRIDE take thee GROOM to my wedded Husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish (alternate ancient ceremony: to love, cherish and to obey), till death us do part, according to God's holy law; and thereto I give thee my troth.
[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]

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[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]BLESS, O Lord, this Ring, that he who gives it and she who shall wear it may remain faithful to each other, and abide peace, and favour, and live together in love until their lives’ end. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

[/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif] WITH this Ring I thee wed, with my body I thee honor, and all my worldly goods with thee I share; [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif](alternate ancient ceremony: with my body I thee worship and with all my worldly goods I thee endow); [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen.

They shall both kneel down: the congregation shall remain standing and the Minister shall say,

Let us pray. O ETERNAL God, Creator and Preserver of all mankind, Giver of all spiritual grace, the Author of everlasting life; Send thy blessing upon these thy servants, this Man and this Woman, whom we bless in thy Name; that living faithfully together, may surely perform and keep the vow and covenant betwixt them made, whereof this Ring given and received is a token and pledge, and may ever remain in perfect love and peace together, and live according to thy laws; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. [/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]Those whom God hath joined together let no man put asunder. [/FONT]

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]FORASMUCH as GROOM and BRIDE have consented together in holy wedlock, and have witnessed the same before God and this company, and thereto have given and pledged their troth, either to other, and have declared the same by giving and receiving a Ring, and by joining hands; I pronounce that they are Man and Wife, In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen[/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif]The Minister shall add this Blessing.

GOD the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Ghost, bless, preserve, and keep you; the Lord mercifully with his favour look upon you, and so fill you with all spiritual benediction and grace; that ye may so live together in this life, that in the world to come ye may have life everlasting. Amen. [/FONT]​

[FONT=Times New Roman,Times,serif][ An important point to be made is that the English Catholic version recited by many brides before 1549 and all of Henry VIII's brides, the bride was required to vow to be "bonny and buxom in bed and at board"]
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[Royal Fan]

What does that mean????????

 

[iowabelle]

I think "bonny and buxom" meant available and not giving the king too much attitude.

 

[IloveCP]

^ In the show The Tudors,When Henry VIII marries Catherine Parr,she does not say "obey".She did say "to be bonny and buxom in bed".Was does that mean?

Catherine Parr's reign as Queen - YouTube

 

[NGalitzine]

^ In the show The Tudors,When Henry VIII marries Catherine Parr,she does not say "obey".She did say "to be bonny and buxom in bed".Was does that mean?

Catherine Parr's reign as Queen - YouTube

Basically I think she was agreeing to have sex whenever Henry wanted it.

 

[IloveCP]

I wonder if she really said that.If she did,why could'nt Henry say that!

Haha.

 

[Daria_S]

How about the Romanovs

In the Orthodox Church there are no spoken vows. The priest does all the blessings and prayers and then the bride and the groom are crowned, and led around the altar three times (don't know if that's before or after the ring exchange).

 

[blauerengel]

Kate Middleton's wedding vows: what's in a word? | Samhita Mukhopadhyay | Comment is free | guardian.co.uk
That´s an article on Kate and her wedding vow without obey ;-)
I really like traditional weddings and keeping the ceremony as it has been for so many years,however I always disliked the "obey" part so it´s good to see that Catherine Middleton was able to change that-it was still a wonderful traditional wedding ceremony and I hope her example will be followed and set an end to this archaic word

excerpt from the wedding program with William and Catherines words:
http://weddings.about.com/od/williamandkate/a/William-And-Kates-Wedding-Vows.htm

 

[Daria_S]

Kate Middleton's wedding vows: what's in a word? | Samhita Mukhopadhyay | Comment is free | guardian.co.uk
That´s an article on Kate and her wedding vow without obdenience ;-)
I really like traditional weddings and keeping the ceremony as it has been for so many years,however I always disliked the "obey" part so it´s good to see that Catherine Middleton was able to change that-it was still a wonderful traditional wedding ceremony and I hope her example will be followed and set an end to this archaic word

excerpt from the wedding program with William and Catherines words:
The Royal Wedding Vows - What William and Kate Promised Each Other at the Altar

I read on this forum that Diana, Princess of Wales omitted the word 'obey' from her wedding vows too.

 

[blauerengel]

You are right

During the vows Diana accidentally reversed the order of Charles's names, saying Philip Charles Arthur George instead. She did not promise to "obey" him; that traditional vow was left out at the couple's request, which caused a sensation at the time.
Wedding of Charles, Prince of Wales, and Lady Diana Spencer - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

[Molly2101]

I don't see anything wrong with adding "obey" to the vows, although it is very old fashioned. When Sophie chose to include it in her vow to Edward the media, and the world, were in uproar. I am not sure I see what the big deal was; they were her vows, her choice, her words - she could say what she wished. I honestly do not see Sophie obeying Edward though, at all. I imagine it's the other way around!

I remember reading about Diana mixing up Charles' names. Quite amusing and difficult for the women marrying into the family as the princes all have 4 names. What an unnecessary thing to do! No doubt Diana rehearsed the names several times but nerves came into the situation and she got confused. I know I would definitely have to pause before saying their names to get them right!

 

[XeniaCasaraghi]

Didn't someone ask for the Swedish King and Queen's wedding vows? Was that ever provided? If a woman wants to keep the obey part of the vows who the he11 cares, it is her decision. It's not like any woman today takes it literally. Most people ignore the "til death do us part" and "remaining faithful" parts of the vows as well.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

In the Orthodox Church there are no spoken vows. The priest does all the blessings and prayers and then the bride and the groom are crowned, and led around the alter three times (don't know if that's before or after the ring exchange).

It's a breathtakingly beautiful almost mystical ceremony(Orthodox wedding liturgy)

 

[Meraude]

Didn't someone ask for the Swedish King and Queen's wedding vows? Was that ever provided?

Here are the three options for Swedish wedding vows, I think that both the king and queen as well as Victoria and Daniel used the first ones. Swedish Wedding Vows

 

[Daria_S]

It's a breathtakingly beautiful almost mystical ceremony(Orthodox wedding liturgy)

From what I've seen of it, yes it is. Though the universal complaint is that it's too long .