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  #1681  
Old 08-13-2020, 02:54 PM
Lilyflo's Avatar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
Okay - just a few things.
1. Archie mimicking the wildlife noises in Cape Town at the ambassadorís house. The ambassador lives in a very nice part of Cape Town but it is no where near wildlife - only thing anyone in South Africa thinks the kid could of heard was maybe a hadidar which a baby canít replicate.
They didn't say he was mimicking wildlife noises. Archie started "mimicking the sound of animals". These could have been birds, dogs, cats etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
2. The place that Harry frequents in Botswana is well known in Southern Africa. It also has a well maintained and kept shower and toilet block - there was no need for Meghan to pee in the veld. Saying she did is making everyone who knows the place shake thier head. Also in most of these places you are told not to pee in the bush, large cats and elephants donít like the smell. So South Africans who read this think it is a bunch of blooey.
When Meghan went into the woodlands "for a bathroom break" it was when they were away from the main campsite on safari so nowhere near any toilet blocks.
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  #1682  
Old 08-13-2020, 03:00 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Helen.CH View Post
according to a press article the german version of the book says at the end,
the authors did possibly talk to the couple themselves , possibly in the sense of "when necessary or for detailed information ". same in the english version?
thanks for posting.
I'm sure this doesn't mean that they spoke to them specifically for this book. I think it refers to times when they've spoken to them in the course of their royal reporting. I posted briefly about this here if it's any help: https://www.theroyalforums.com/forum...ml#post2334265
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  #1683  
Old 08-13-2020, 03:05 PM
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...of all the things I *wouldn't* have predicted to happen in 2020:
"a bathroombreak described in a book about royalty" would probably even be higher on the list than 'covid19'...
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Wisdom begins in wonder - Socrates
  #1684  
Old 08-13-2020, 03:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilyflo View Post
I'm sure this doesn't mean that they spoke to them specifically for this book. I think it refers to times when they've spoken to them in the course of their royal reporting. I posted briefly about this here if it's any help: https://www.theroyalforums.com/forum...ml#post2334265
Thank you very much.
The literally meaning of the sentence at the end if the book does mean they spoke with them.
I thought it could have been a translation problem in the german version.
But as discussed before all is left for interpretation.
  #1685  
Old 08-13-2020, 03:37 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy100 View Post
Its interesting because Melissa leaving was if I recall it right, the catalyst for many of the "Duchess difficult" stories and it being why a number of staff left.

I wonder why they were so unhappy with her work and if so why they publicly released such a praising statement about her and her work.

Is that the feeling you get from the book Fem, "nothing else matters than the Sussexes and their sensitive feelings"? Thats the impression I got from the exerts but wondered if that was just the media stiring trouble and the rest of the book put it into context and made it seem less so, maybe not it seems.

There just seem to be so many examples of them putting themselves first before others and speaking publicly (whether to the authors of the book or the many sources who spoke to the authors) about others in a way they wouldn't like being done about themselves.
Quote:
Originally Posted by tommy100 View Post
The personal assistant who left, apparently after "Meghan left her in tears" and she couldn't cope with all the demands.
The first thought that went through my mind when reading about, especially the first nanny, was that someone had an "emotional (and protective) fit" and fired the nanny in a fit of anger.
Because normally it has to very extreme to fire someone on the spot. And doing that only to praise that persons skills afterwards suggest an overreaction.

Booting one nanny on the spot happens. Booting two is unfortunate, but if it happens more often then it says more about the parents than the nannies.
Having said that quite a number of parents are nuts when it comes to their children. I have been elbowed often enough in the ribs by Mrs. Muhler at parent-meetings in the schools to have that fact confirmed...

It is my firm opinion, that while you still have to be the boss, if the work-climate is bad and the turn-over rate of your employees is high then it's almost always down to bad management.
To me this suggest that H&M at best were inexperienced parents, who saw things differently than their experienced nanny and overreacted by firing her - and that something similar happened to the second nanny.
The question about the personal assistant is more unclear.

----

But I'll try turn the table 180 degrees and see what happens.

Your child is the most precious thing in your life. Period!
There is nothing more important than the well-being and welfare of your child. It's one of the absolute strongest instincts.
You place the most important thing in your life in the hands of a stranger, so you must be able to trust that stranger 110%.

Even if H&M may have overreacted, it is their child, their rules - and that's something the nanny has to adhere to, not the other way around. If an employee can't adjust, well, it's better to part.
There may also be personality differences. Not all nannies are like Mary Poppins or Fršulein Maria - if you can't get along on a personal level it's better to part.

As for personal assistants, and "being left in tears." Being a personal assistant is a demanding job, where you really have to conform to your employer and not all people work together well. The assistant may be the best in the world, but if her personality clash with her employer's personality, it simply doesn't work.
And staff who have been dismissed, usually don't have anything good to say about their former employer and are most willing to share that opinion - which a gleeful press-corps happily took up and blew out of proportions.
  #1686  
Old 08-13-2020, 03:53 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
Okay -

That been said - 2 questions.Can the Mail in their defense call Omid and ask if Meghanís friends spoke to him and if those friends had been given permission to do so by the Sussexís. Also the extract of the letter to her father - can they say that Meghan gave him permission, even if the letter was now out in the public?
Oddly enough most of my friends where more intrigued about what wasnít covered by the book . There was lots of glaring omissions apparently.
Given that Scobie wrote/talked about how Meghan wrote the letter, at the center of the case, with a public audience in mindó I just donít see why the defense would not call him to testify under oath
  #1687  
Old 08-13-2020, 04:27 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Merrie View Post
Am I the only one on the forum who has zero interest in this book? I was sorry to see Harry leave the RF, but I do think he will be back. Whether his wife is with him when he returns is yet to be determined.

I don't want him to go back. Even if he divorces Meghan it's too late. Thought I suspect if that happens he'll move to Africa. He has an Africa fetish.
  #1688  
Old 08-13-2020, 04:37 PM
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An article about various trips taken by the Duke and Duchess, based on information in "Finding Freedom".

The couple honeymooned on a "private island north of the Seychelles", flying there by private plane.

Other trips included dog-sledding in Norway, the Vista Alegre resort in Ibizia and a villa overlooking Yalikavak Bay, near Bodrum, Turkey.

And the friend who lent his home for the Prince's first meeting with his future mother-in-law was on the infamous Las Vegas trip in earlier years.

https://travel.nine.com.au/latest/fi...1-bf7e4e64649e


The special based on "Finding Freedom" is going to be screened on Australian television this coming Saturday night.
  #1689  
Old 08-13-2020, 04:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Eskimo View Post
Given that Scobie wrote/talked about how Meghan wrote the letter, at the center of the case, with a public audience in mind— I just don’t see why the defense would not call him to testify under oath
I think so, too, why shouldn't they?

And concerning the nannygate, I agree with what was said above and before.
It tells a lot about them. who in earth did they employ to find out the first day the person is unable to fullfill duties��*♀️ and then again?
but it seems to be just another chapter of "we know everything better and do things different than W&K" instead of profiting from their experience or sb else's in the RF. and just another failure of H&M. I wonder what will happen once this child needs to go out and make his own way, if kindergarden or elementary school, friends or hobbies. I think Archie will end up in a bubble much worse than his royal cousins who seem to be brought up with much love&sense and of course more experience and good staff.
  #1690  
Old 08-13-2020, 05:34 PM
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Daily update on book. I also happen to be reading, actually reading, A Thousand Ships. A retelling of the Troy myths. Highly recommend. The Finding Freedom us a staycation book for the car while we drive around. We are.all enjoying loling at it to be honest.

Anyway. She became the jewel in the crown of Suits. I presume.this is post relationship. People were jealous

She thinks alot about clothes. A lot is about her clothes.

Everything about the royals surprises her. Their lives are far more humble than she thought

She had a lot of friends who provide private jets.

Jessica Mulroney comes across as just as much of an influencer air head as Meghan.

Notts Cottage is too small for ber liking. Implied over and over again. Her clothes, upon moving, took up one bedroom.

She is brilliant and adapts to everything. Even buying hand warmers to give out to the gate guards in KP.

Kate and her still distant.

A courtier said that Kate was gorgeous and quiet and shy but Meghan was...insert all female empowerment words.

Yada yada yada. Meghan is perfect. Harry really is still not getting much of a say.

Kate and Wills Amner hall is very informal. They stayed there because Meghan, as an unmarried, was not invited to stay the night at Sandringham. But both of the York girls fellas were once they were engaged, no? Unless they.stayed on a cottage on the land or with Kate and William too.

So far so good. I feel I am reading the Tig. Did she actually ghost write this?

Jason comes up again and again. Nothing actually said about him though.
  #1691  
Old 08-13-2020, 05:38 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Helen.CH View Post
according to a press article the german version of the book says at the end,
the authors did possibly talk to the couple themselves , possibly in the sense of "when necessary or for detailed information ". same in the english version?
thanks for posting.
Here is an image of the author's note:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EfK_G-VX...jpg&name=large

ETA:
This is the comment:
We have spoken with close friends of Harry and Meghan, royal aides and palace staff (past and present), the charities and organisations they have built long-lasting relationships with and, when appropriate, the couple themselves.
  #1692  
Old 08-13-2020, 05:43 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilyflo View Post


When Meghan went into the woodlands "for a bathroom break" it was when they were away from the main campsite on safari so nowhere near any toilet blocks.
I see nothing great about this. After a life time of 1. Getting caught out either a. Drunk b. Drunk. C. On a family farm and unable to hold. 2. Being thought as a young age by my mother how to avoid peeing my knick knacks while squatting. 3. Having the undiluted delight of having children declare they need to go and they need to go now while.around 5 minutes from 5her nearest toilet and having to train them how to similarly squat.

Men are so lucky in this regard.
  #1693  
Old 08-13-2020, 05:52 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lee-Z View Post
...of all the things I *wouldn't* have predicted to happen in 2020:
"a bathroombreak described in a book about royalty" would probably even be higher on the list than 'covid19'...

It's just embarrassing. I don't need to know about Meghan's toilet habits! It might have been funny in a sitcom, but royals are supposed at least to try to be dignified. Even Sarah Ferguson wouldn't talk about going behind a bush when there were no toilets!
  #1694  
Old 08-13-2020, 06:18 PM
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I've finally been able to chew through the final excerpts and summaries in this thread. It's time to wrap up.

And the conclusion I've reached is bad.
The book is bad. It's badly written, it's badly put together and it completely miss it's intention, which is to to explain things from H&M's perspective and vindicate them as well as justifying their actions. In fact IMO it's done more harm than the other books about H&M put together - and they were critical!
Had a professional PR company commissioned the authors they would have thrown out the manuscript and probably hired new authors.

What is even worse is that M&H comes out even more ruffled in their feathers than they already were.
My opinion of H&M, in particular Harry, has dropped. He has disappointed me and Meghan has failed to impress me.

I have played the Devil's Advocate (It's fun, I can only recommend it) but even the best defense I could think off, would have been shredded to pieces with ease. It was tenuous. The whole book is tenuous - basically because H&M IMO has a very bad case.

There is no question in my mind that H&M were more than indirectly involved in this book, there are simply too many intimate details that could only originate from H&M themselves. So either H&M talked to the authors or friends of H&M told the authors what they themselves had heard from H&M.

It has sadly confirmed my suspicion that H&M live in a bubble, have a distorted view of themselves, their roles and their importance. It is also my distinct impression that they are now only surrounded by people who confirm what H&M say and that H&M no longer listens to anyone but themselves - if they have ever listened to anyone but themselves.
There is no one left to tell them that: if you publish this, you will be crucified!

This book, combined with other books and the multitude of articles about them paints a picture of a very selfish couple, who cannot cope with criticism, who will not accept counter-arguments and who when met with opposition react with anger - and by fleeing. Like a child who threatens to run away.
Harry comes across as a person with serious issues, who really needs counseling, because he is going down on a road to self-destruction. Even the marriage to a woman he adores can't change that. That would be statistically improbable.
I don't know whether the marriage with Meghan reinforced these traits in Harry's personality or whether they have been dormant and are surfacing now for whatever reason.
It is simply not rational behavior to completely ditch those people who have meant most to you, your entire life and who have been looking out for you. Something is seriously wrong.
Nor is it rational behavior to try and reform an institution he has been born in to and which he knows intimately and how it works, in such a drastic and uncompromising manner. Rome wasn't build in one day and the BRF cannot be reformed in one day either, there are simply too many considerations to take into account even if H&M somehow managed to persuade the rest of the BRF. Especially not something that seems to be building not on a vision, but a mirage of a vision somewhere out there in the horizon. - They didn't even seem to have a concrete plan, no blueprint for implementing the plan, no considerations for the consequences and even worse no considerations for the BRF members. - It was handled in the most self-centered way imaginable IMO.

H&M constant feud with the press is interesting. What were they thinking? Of course Meghan would get a grilling. The British press is notorious for that (and IMO very unreasonable as well, not only towards Meghan) but don't fight a war you cannot win. The BRF has learned that the hard way, but H&M went to war regardless. It is at best ill-advised. At worst it shows a lack of sound and cool judgement.

This book also made it clear to me, that H&M through the authors, has little to no regards or sense for the feelings of those near and dear to them, in particular friends and BRF members. If you have a row with a royal family member, why, oh why, oh why talk about it in public? They won't fight back - in public. They can't. Where is the wish to reconciliation? There is no such wish, there is only a self-centered wish to explain and vindicate themselves. Obviously without realizing that it comes out as petty and mean.

As for staff-discontent. Like I said before, if there are problems with employees it's typically down to bad management.

Now for Meghan. I have been very hesitant about voicing what has been in the back of my mind for a long time now. I didn't feel I could relate to her in the same way as Harry, who is a royal and a man and I wanted to give her the benefit of doubt. I may still be wrong, I hope so.
I have the impression that she is an opportunist. She married Harry but entered the BRF as an opportunist. What's in it for her?
And she has left as an opportunist. Who benefits the most from leaving the BRF, Meghan or Harry?
Who would have benefited the most had H&M's vision of working parallel to the BRF been allowed to take place? Harry? Meghan? The BRF?
Why did she not study her future role? She knew she would become one of the most exposed women in the world! Anyone I can think of would be terrified and would want to study that new role as much as possible in order to do as good a job as possible. To think that you can just walk into a new role, a royal role, in a foreign country, in a foreign culture, with minimum preparation is optimistic beyond reason.
Meghan was not sixteen and naive when she married Harry, she was a mature woman.

This whole book is crammed with examples of a distorted (self)-image of Meghan.
Those around her being in awe of her perfection. - Good grief!
Impressing Harry by being able to pee in a forest. - Big deal.
Some row about jewellery I never really understood. - There are women who would kill to be married wearing the jewellery Meghan had at her disposal!
Something about feeling let down by her sister-in-law who went shopping almost the same place where Meghan was going. - Well, find another day to go shopping together!
All small things that only matters in a self-centered world. Why allowing such petty things to be mentioned in a book you obviously had a part in being written?!? That would never have happen if Meghan was media-savvy, so she isn't. And Harry is no better.

So in short: This book is a train-wreck written about a couple on a runaway train heading for a very flimsy bridge over a canyon that even Vil E. Coyote wouldn't go near.

But this book, piled on top of other and critical books, as well as the many articles, indicates to me that, this time, the papers and even the tabloids may very likely have gotten it right.

I hope H&M, despite the odds being against them, will find happiness. - I just don't think so to be honest.

And with that, I see no further reason to post in this tread.
  #1695  
Old 08-13-2020, 06:43 PM
Heir Presumptive
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Woodbury, United States
Posts: 2,635
Quote:
Originally Posted by poppy7 View Post
Daily update on book. I also happen to be reading, actually reading, A Thousand Ships. A retelling of the Troy myths. Highly recommend. The Finding Freedom us a staycation book for the car while we drive around. We are.all enjoying loling at it to be honest.

Anyway. She became the jewel in the crown of Suits. I presume.this is post relationship. People were jealous

She thinks alot about clothes. A lot is about her clothes.

Everything about the royals surprises her. Their lives are far more humble than she thought

She had a lot of friends who provide private jets.

Jessica Mulroney comes across as just as much of an influencer air head as Meghan.

Notts Cottage is too small for ber liking. Implied over and over again. Her clothes, upon moving, took up one bedroom.

She is brilliant and adapts to everything. Even buying hand warmers to give out to the gate guards in KP.

Kate and her still distant.

A courtier said that Kate was gorgeous and quiet and shy but Meghan was...insert all female empowerment words.

Yada yada yada. Meghan is perfect. Harry really is still not getting much of a say.

Kate and Wills Amner hall is very informal. They stayed there because Meghan, as an unmarried, was not invited to stay the night at Sandringham. But both of the York girls fellas were once they were engaged, no? Unless they.stayed on a cottage on the land or with Kate and William too.

So far so good. I feel I am reading the Tig. Did she actually ghost write this?

Jason comes up again and again. Nothing actually said about him though.
Oh my, someone has a massive ego. I never saw the show, but I always read websites like TV Line because I enjoy reading about TV. I never got the impression that Meghan was anything special on that show, even after she was seeing Harry. TV Line and other media didnít start covering the show more often because M was on it. The fact that M thinks everyone is jealous of her speaks volumes for her arrogance. Believe me, who would be jealous of a mediocre actress on a mediocre show? What, does she think sheís resented because she landed Harry, lol?

That comparison of Kate and Meghan ticks me off; the implication is that Kate is weaker because sheís beautiful and quiet. This woman has much more strength and character than M and her cronies (and whoever this courtier is) know.


Thanks for the recap!
  #1696  
Old 08-13-2020, 06:44 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: England, United Kingdom
Posts: 3,533
Muhler as always spot on!

The most telling thing about this book is IMO what has been included, because its so mundane, petty and really not that important details and incidents it says a lot. Even if H&M didn't speak to the authors for the book directly the fact they then must have seen fit to share these trivial, petty details with a wide circle of friends just as equally shows how bothered they were by them.

For people who want to change the world and at the very least thought they could modernise and change the long traditions and workings of the BRF they seem bothered by remarkably trivial and insignificant details which bogs them down.

I'd love to know how H&M see this book - do they think it is has helped put their version out there and will be well received and do they cringe at the pettiness, trivial nature of it and see its made them look ridiculous? (I suspect not simply as if they did they'd be speaking out more against it).

I'm starting to think of things not in the book and wonder why they have been left out, I'd hold off on commenting down that route yet as I haven't read the whole book myself to know for sure if thing have/have not been mentioned.
  #1697  
Old 08-13-2020, 06:46 PM
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Location: Woodbury, United States
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alison H View Post
It's just embarrassing. I don't need to know about Meghan's toilet habits! It might have been funny in a sitcom, but royals are supposed at least to try to be dignified. Even Sarah Ferguson wouldn't talk about going behind a bush when there were no toilets!
Her toilet habits are being used to show how grounded and unspoiled she is, but I agree with you; this is crass, way too much information than anyone ever needed to know.
  #1698  
Old 08-13-2020, 06:48 PM
rominet09's Avatar
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: LIEGE, Belgium
Posts: 4,948
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler View Post
I've finally been able to chew through the final excerpts and summaries in this thread. It's time to wrap up.

And the conclusion I've reached is bad.
The book is bad. It's badly written, it's badly put together and it completely miss it's intention, which is to to explain things from H&M's perspective and vindicate them as well as justifying their actions. In fact IMO it's done more harm than the other books about H&M put together - and they were critical!
Had a professional PR company commissioned the authors they would have thrown out the manuscript and probably hired new authors.

What is even worse is that M&H comes out even more ruffled in their feathers than they already were.
My opinion of H&M, in particular Harry, has dropped. He has disappointed me and Meghan has failed to impress me.

I have played the Devil's Advocate (It's fun, I can only recommend it) but even the best defense I could think off, would have been shredded to pieces with ease. It was tenuous. The whole book is tenuous - basically because H&M IMO has a very bad case.

There is no question in my mind that H&M were more than indirectly involved in this book, there are simply too many intimate details that could only originate from H&M themselves. So either H&M talked to the authors or friends of H&M told the authors what they themselves had heard from H&M.

It has sadly confirmed my suspicion that H&M live in a bubble, have a distorted view of themselves, their roles and their importance. It is also my distinct impression that they are now only surrounded by people who confirm what H&M say and that H&M no longer listens to anyone but themselves - if they have ever listened to anyone but themselves.
There is no one left to tell them that: if you publish this, you will be crucified!

This book, combined with other books and the multitude of articles about them paints a picture of a very selfish couple, who cannot cope with criticism, who will not accept counter-arguments and who when met with opposition react with anger - and by fleeing. Like a child who threatens to run away.
Harry comes across as a person with serious issues, who really needs counseling, because he is going down on a road to self-destruction. Even the marriage to a woman he adores can't change that. That would be statistically improbable.
I don't know whether the marriage with Meghan reinforced these traits in Harry's personality or whether they have been dormant and are surfacing now for whatever reason.
It is simply not rational behavior to completely ditch those people who have meant most to you, your entire life and who have been looking out for you. Something is seriously wrong.
Nor is it rational behavior to try and reform an institution he has been born in to and which he knows intimately and how it works, in such a drastic and uncompromising manner. Rome wasn't build in one day and the BRF cannot be reformed in one day either, there are simply too many considerations to take into account even if H&M somehow managed to persuade the rest of the BRF. Especially not something that seems to be building not on a vision, but a mirage of a vision somewhere out there in the horizon. - They didn't even seem to have a concrete plan, no blueprint for implementing the plan, no considerations for the consequences and even worse no considerations for the BRF members. - It was handled in the most self-centered way imaginable IMO.

H&M constant feud with the press is interesting. What were they thinking? Of course Meghan would get a grilling. The British press is notorious for that (and IMO very unreasonable as well, not only towards Meghan) but don't fight a war you cannot win. The BRF has learned that the hard way, but H&M went to war regardless. It is at best ill-advised. At worst it shows a lack of sound and cool judgement.

This book also made it clear to me, that H&M through the authors, has little to no regards or sense for the feelings of those near and dear to them, in particular friends and BRF members. If you have a row with a royal family member, why, oh why, oh why talk about it in public? They won't fight back - in public. They can't. Where is the wish to reconciliation? There is no such wish, there is only a self-centered wish to explain and vindicate themselves. Obviously without realizing that it comes out as petty and mean.

As for staff-discontent. Like I said before, if there are problems with employees it's typically down to bad management.

Now for Meghan. I have been very hesitant about voicing what has been in the back of my mind for a long time now. I didn't feel I could relate to her in the same way as Harry, who is a royal and a man and I wanted to give her the benefit of doubt. I may still be wrong, I hope so.
I have the impression that she is an opportunist. She married Harry but entered the BRF as an opportunist. What's in it for her?
And she has left as an opportunist. Who benefits the most from leaving the BRF, Meghan or Harry?
Who would have benefited the most had H&M's vision of working parallel to the BRF been allowed to take place? Harry? Meghan? The BRF?
Why did she not study her future role? She knew she would become one of the most exposed women in the world! Anyone I can think of would be terrified and would want to study that new role as much as possible in order to do as good a job as possible. To think that you can just walk into a new role, a royal role, in a foreign country, in a foreign culture, with minimum preparation is optimistic beyond reason.
Meghan was not sixteen and naive when she married Harry, she was a mature woman.

This whole book is crammed with examples of a distorted (self)-image of Meghan.
Those around her being in awe of her perfection. - Good grief!
Impressing Harry by being able to pee in a forest. - Big deal.
Some row about jewellery I never really understood. - There are women who would kill to be married wearing the jewellery Meghan had at her disposal!
Something about feeling let down by her sister-in-law who went shopping almost the same place where Meghan was going. - Well, find another day to go shopping together!
All small things that only matters in a self-centered world. Why allowing such petty things to be mentioned in a book you obviously had a part in being written?!? That would never have happen if Meghan was media-savvy, so she isn't. And Harry is no better.

So in short: This book is a train-wreck written about a couple on a runaway train heading for a very flimsy bridge over a canyon that even Vil E. Coyote wouldn't go near.

But this book, piled on top of other and critical books, as well as the many articles, indicates to me that, this time, the papers and even the tabloids may very likely have gotten it right.

I hope H&M, despite the odds being against them, will find happiness. - I just don't think so to be honest.

And with that, I see no further reason to post in this tread.
VERY impressed by what you wrote, such a clear view of the situation. I really wonder what will follow.... I think it is really bad to complain in their situation considering the awful situation a lot of people live in this age of virus, loss of jobs etc... I dont say they have no reason to complain BUT in this time and age it is not decent to say.... It is just like complaining of a cold in front of people battling cancer.... My opinion of course and I used to LOVE them !
  #1699  
Old 08-13-2020, 07:43 PM
Serene Highness
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: jersey shore, United States
Posts: 1,124
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler View Post
I've finally been able to chew through the final excerpts and summaries in this thread. It's time to wrap up.

And the conclusion I've reached is bad.
The book is bad. It's badly written, it's badly put together and it completely miss it's intention, which is to to explain things from H&M's perspective and vindicate them as well as justifying their actions. In fact IMO it's done more harm than the other books about H&M put together - and they were critical!
Had a professional PR company commissioned the authors they would have thrown out the manuscript and probably hired new authors.

What is even worse is that M&H comes out even more ruffled in their feathers than they already were.
My opinion of H&M, in particular Harry, has dropped. He has disappointed me and Meghan has failed to impress me.

I have played the Devil's Advocate (It's fun, I can only recommend it) but even the best defense I could think off, would have been shredded to pieces with ease. It was tenuous. The whole book is tenuous - basically because H&M IMO has a very bad case.

There is no question in my mind that H&M were more than indirectly involved in this book, there are simply too many intimate details that could only originate from H&M themselves. So either H&M talked to the authors or friends of H&M told the authors what they themselves had heard from H&M.

It has sadly confirmed my suspicion that H&M live in a bubble, have a distorted view of themselves, their roles and their importance. It is also my distinct impression that they are now only surrounded by people who confirm what H&M say and that H&M no longer listens to anyone but themselves - if they have ever listened to anyone but themselves.
There is no one left to tell them that: if you publish this, you will be crucified!

This book, combined with other books and the multitude of articles about them paints a picture of a very selfish couple, who cannot cope with criticism, who will not accept counter-arguments and who when met with opposition react with anger - and by fleeing. Like a child who threatens to run away.
Harry comes across as a person with serious issues, who really needs counseling, because he is going down on a road to self-destruction. Even the marriage to a woman he adores can't change that. That would be statistically improbable.
I don't know whether the marriage with Meghan reinforced these traits in Harry's personality or whether they have been dormant and are surfacing now for whatever reason.
It is simply not rational behavior to completely ditch those people who have meant most to you, your entire life and who have been looking out for you. Something is seriously wrong.
Nor is it rational behavior to try and reform an institution he has been born in to and which he knows intimately and how it works, in such a drastic and uncompromising manner. Rome wasn't build in one day and the BRF cannot be reformed in one day either, there are simply too many considerations to take into account even if H&M somehow managed to persuade the rest of the BRF. Especially not something that seems to be building not on a vision, but a mirage of a vision somewhere out there in the horizon. - They didn't even seem to have a concrete plan, no blueprint for implementing the plan, no considerations for the consequences and even worse no considerations for the BRF members. - It was handled in the most self-centered way imaginable IMO.

H&M constant feud with the press is interesting. What were they thinking? Of course Meghan would get a grilling. The British press is notorious for that (and IMO very unreasonable as well, not only towards Meghan) but don't fight a war you cannot win. The BRF has learned that the hard way, but H&M went to war regardless. It is at best ill-advised. At worst it shows a lack of sound and cool judgement.

This book also made it clear to me, that H&M through the authors, has little to no regards or sense for the feelings of those near and dear to them, in particular friends and BRF members. If you have a row with a royal family member, why, oh why, oh why talk about it in public? They won't fight back - in public. They can't. Where is the wish to reconciliation? There is no such wish, there is only a self-centered wish to explain and vindicate themselves. Obviously without realizing that it comes out as petty and mean.

As for staff-discontent. Like I said before, if there are problems with employees it's typically down to bad management.

Now for Meghan. I have been very hesitant about voicing what has been in the back of my mind for a long time now. I didn't feel I could relate to her in the same way as Harry, who is a royal and a man and I wanted to give her the benefit of doubt. I may still be wrong, I hope so.
I have the impression that she is an opportunist. She married Harry but entered the BRF as an opportunist. What's in it for her?
And she has left as an opportunist. Who benefits the most from leaving the BRF, Meghan or Harry?
Who would have benefited the most had H&M's vision of working parallel to the BRF been allowed to take place? Harry? Meghan? The BRF?
Why did she not study her future role? She knew she would become one of the most exposed women in the world! Anyone I can think of would be terrified and would want to study that new role as much as possible in order to do as good a job as possible. To think that you can just walk into a new role, a royal role, in a foreign country, in a foreign culture, with minimum preparation is optimistic beyond reason.
Meghan was not sixteen and naive when she married Harry, she was a mature woman.

This whole book is crammed with examples of a distorted (self)-image of Meghan.
Those around her being in awe of her perfection. - Good grief!
Impressing Harry by being able to pee in a forest. - Big deal.
Some row about jewellery I never really understood. - There are women who would kill to be married wearing the jewellery Meghan had at her disposal!
Something about feeling let down by her sister-in-law who went shopping almost the same place where Meghan was going. - Well, find another day to go shopping together!
All small things that only matters in a self-centered world. Why allowing such petty things to be mentioned in a book you obviously had a part in being written?!? That would never have happen if Meghan was media-savvy, so she isn't. And Harry is no better.

So in short: This book is a train-wreck written about a couple on a runaway train heading for a very flimsy bridge over a canyon that even Vil E. Coyote wouldn't go near.

But this book, piled on top of other and critical books, as well as the many articles, indicates to me that, this time, the papers and even the tabloids may very likely have gotten it right.

I hope H&M, despite the odds being against them, will find happiness. - I just don't think so to be honest.

And with that, I see no further reason to post in this tread.
Youíre a superb Devilís Advocate...

Much respect Muhler, HAT DOFF
  #1700  
Old 08-13-2020, 08:00 PM
Courtier
 
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 830
This book is a bad idea. If they in any way cooperated thinking it would "get their point out there" and make them look good they were mistaken.
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