"1015 København K" by Trine Villemann (2007)

[Villemann]

Well, then it might have escaped the "Danish papers" - which do you mean? - that Frederik was Regent on 62 days in 2007. It might also have escaped their attention how - apart from his trip to Mozambique - relatively empty Joachim's calendar was since the announcement of his engagement. 30 occasions where he stepped in for the queen, I wonder which were those occasions?

Get me right, I don't criticize Joachim. I think he has been treated quite unfairly by the media in the past. But I think you are over-praising his workload and at the same time belittling the one of his brother, for reasons whatsoever. I am watching the calendar of the DRF and it is quite clear that - after the Queen - Mary and Frederik are the ones with the most official events nowadays. You make it sound as if Joachim works more than his brother, when he actually does not.


I can't speak for all but I personally get sore when facts are distorted. IMO in most cases you are distorting facts (see e.g. your comment about the poll in BB in another thread or your claim to be the first to report positively about Joachim - no, others have done that before you).


I would guess it was because it was a birthday, not a charity event.
And why wasn't the birthday of Willem Alexander turned into a charity event? And why wasn't the birthday of the king of Sweden turned into a charity event? And why wasn't the birthday of the king and queen of Norway turned into a charity event? ...

Ekstra Bladet, Jyllands-Posten, Politiken were the ones I saw the story in. Of course Prince Joachim's royal calendar is not as full as CP Frederik's. He has a full time job running Schackenborg! All his royal duties come on top of his duties at Schackenborg. The birthday party was in MY opinion a perfect opportunity for CP Frederik to show us Danes how he wants to modernize the monarchy. All this royal over-the-top.partying is oldfashioned and not in tune with the times. Those of us, who want to take the monarchy forward, would like to see a Crown Prince and Crown Princesses being far more aware of the fact, that they have to lead by example! Others might prefer to keep on insisting that the emperor is wearing clothes, but I am not one of them!

 

[Emeralds and Opals]

Re: Mary Bio that was recently read

I've got a copy on order. I feel more comfortable talking about a book if I've read it or at least got it available to refer to when discussing it. As Marengo said, there seems to be a lot more to the book than just comments about Mary's role and whether she's fulfilling it effectively. I just read a biography of Mary which fairly clearly glossed over quite a lot of stuff going on with the royal family, and I found the lack of background material rather frustrating.

Which Biography of CPss Mary did you read?

Any information would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Villemann]

Why should Mary 'reform' her husband? She loves the man he is - he is her husband not a project. Support him, give advice when asked, yes, but I do wonder why you say its her job to 'reform' him???

I am not saying CP Mary should chain Frederik to the garden fence and keep him there until he has reformed! But surely there are subtle ways in which, she can gently push him in the right direction - Like you do in all partnerships, when you think your other half is not doing the right thing. I am a big fan of the late Queen Ingrid. I researched a lot about her for 1015 Copenhagen K and uncovered lots of stuff about her influence behind the scenes. In MY opinion Mary could learn a thing or two by studying how Queen Ingrid managed to turn her spouse, King Frederik IX, around. Ingrid made a king out of her partyloving husband. I am convinced Mary can do the same with her Frederik.

 

[Villemann]

I'm sure glad that you aren't cheering for my team. As a country who adores Fred because they have watched him grow before their very eyes, you are all very unforgiving. (I am sure that most Danes don't feel the same way, so I use the terms all, country and their loosely.) Surely you all love the man he has become, a caring father and husband. A man who supports his country, although he may have said in the past that he would prefer not to be King, he still knows that he has a duty to Denmark and there is no law that states a shy CP can't take over that role. Showing him more confidence would surely have a more positive effect than keep telling him he isn't going to do the job well. Yay, Villemann, way to go.

By ignoring the obvious problems, CP Frederiks suffers from, we are not doing the monarchy any favours. Shy is not the word to use about CP Frederik. He is not shy at all, but in MY opinion he is emotionally shipwrecked after the upbringing he had. Of course he supports his country,I am not questioning that at all. He is a fantastic dad, absolutely, but if you by "showing him confidence" mean we shall turn a blind eye to his flaws as a communicator and his ill-adviced endeavours like IOC, then I disagre. I want someone - preferably CP Mary - to help him. I don't understand why this is such a sensitive issue for many, when it is so clear that he needs help.

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

I agrre it is still early days and the Queen is still alive, so it difficult to get a foot in the door But mary can start taking some small steps towards reforming her husband and the monarchy.

IMO she already does, and much more than most of her peers. I find the wording "reforming" her husband much too strong. What kind of person do you think is Mary is? Some kind of QE II in young who was given tremendous wisdom about how to be an influential Queen by the fairies? She used to be a normal girl until 5 years ago and firstly all the self confidence or impact etc does not come overnight but only grows with longterm experience and secondly it is not her role at this stage. Although I see potential for Fred to improve let's not forget that Mary is only the consort and the only thing that is important about her in relation to the dynasty is that she has given birth to the future heir to the throne. Fred has been groomed for this role, he is a Gluecksburg and not Mary, and I believe that the danish public will give him a chance once his time will come. After that we will all see what happens - if he should struggle he will be in good company because most of his peers will struggle too. In the distant future I could imagine Fred & Mary going down the path of the Swedish Kings (active & good looking woman with potential married to a relatively non-charismatic monarch) who became very much loved and respected in their country although Silvia married into a different situation (whether easier or more difficult I don't know) as she became Queen straight away and did not have to / couldn't do her "learning" years as CP.

 

[crisscross1]

By ignoring the obvious problems, CP Frederiks suffers from, we are not doing the monarchy any favours. Shy is not the word to use about CP Frederik. He is not shy at all, but in MY opinion he is emotionally shipwrecked after the upbringing he had. Of course he supports his country,I am not questioning that at all. He is a fantastic dad, absolutely, but if you by "showing him confidence" mean we shall turn a blind eye to his flaws as a communicator and his ill-adviced endeavours like IOC, then I disagre. I want someone - preferably CP Mary - to help him. I don't understand why this is such a sensitive issue for many, when it is so clear that he needs help.

How can you catergorically state that Fred is not shy. Do you know how it feels to be shy? I do and have done all my life. I would rather die than walk into a room of strangers and have to make idle conversation. I hate meeting new people, I hate being the centre of attention, I hate ...................... the list is endless. You obviously have no sympathy for people who aren't like you, eg: outgoing, extravert, pick me type people.
Emotionally shipwrecked I'm sure that Fred forgave his parents many years ago for the mistakes that they made as parents and I'm sure like many other Royal Families they did what they had to do at the time and never dreamed that they would be held accountable so many years later.
I have to wonder (with respect) whether it may be you who has emotional problems

 

[Villemann]

IMO she already does, and much more than most of her peers. I find the wording "reforming" her husband much too strong. What kind of person do you think is Mary is? Some kind of QE II in young who was given tremendous wisdom about how to be an influential Queen by the fairies? She used to be a normal girl until 5 years ago and firstly all the self confidence or impact etc does not come overnight but only grows with longterm experience and secondly it is not her role at this stage. Although I see potential for Fred to improve let's not forget that Mary is only the consort and the only thing that is important about her in relation to the dynasty is that she has given birth to the future heir to the throne. Fred has been groomed for this role, he is a Gluecksburg and not Mary, and I believe that the danish public will give him a chance once his time will come. After that we will all see what happens - if he should struggle he will be in good company because most of his peers will struggle too. In the distant future I could imagine Fred & Mary going down the path of the Swedish Kings (active & good looking woman with potential married to a relatively non-charismatic monarch) who became very much loved and respected in their country although Silvia married into a different situation (whether easier or more difficult I don't know) as she became Queen straight away and did not have to / couldn't do her "learning" years as CP.

I agree with you that Frederik and most of his royal peers will struggle in the future, because a sthe years pass it will become more and more obvious to everybody what an out-dated, un-democratic institution a monarchy really is. The challenge for everybody is to make it relevant to us and to our children. Silvia was - is - in MY opinion a genius. She really understood how to melt into her position, but then, who taught her: Queen Ingrid, the most fantastic royal the previous century ever saw.

 

[Elspeth]

We're reopening the thread now the book has been out for a couple of weeks.

Note of caution: we're not interested in posts along the lines of "I haven't read it, I'm not going to read it, but it's rubbish and the author is a bad person." This forum is meant for reviews by people who have read the books they're talking about and for people who haven't read them to ask about them. It isn't for general-purpose trashing of books and authors on the basis of second- or third-hand information. Especially not in this case when we have a controversial book whose author is a member of the forum.

Elspeth

Royal Library moderator/TRF admin

 

[Villemann]

I am a royalist. I want the Danish and all other monarchies to survive, because I believe that a good monarchy brings it's people together and provides a mutual understanding of each other. Now, more than ever, in our globalized world, we need to be reminded of our roots. However, my love of the institution has not made me blind to the flaws of the personalities that nowadays inhabit the Danish Royal House. I believe these flaws to be the faultlines within the monarchy, which is why I chose to portray the royals as the human beings they really are. Is it a fair portrayal ? Well, those of you, who have read my book, might disagree, but I have done my best to balance the good with the bad.

 

[TLLK]

Why should Mary 'reform' her husband? She loves the man he is - he is her husband not a project. Support him, give advice when asked, yes, but I do wonder why you say its her job to 'reform' him???

I have to agree. The only person who can decide if he is truly ready to take on this responsibility is Fredrick himself. His wife cannot "make" him do this or "reform" him.

 

[Villemann]

I have to agree. The only person who can decide if he is truly ready to take on this responsibility is Fredrick himself. His wife cannot "make" him do this or "reform" him.

I think she can! In MY opinion CP Mary has that potential - whether she dares to use it is another matter! She is his nearest and dearest - she is the perfect person to try to reform her spouse.

 

[HRH Abigail]

We're reopening the thread now the book has been out for a couple of weeks.

Note of caution: we're not interested in posts along the lines of "I haven't read it, I'm not going to read it, but it's rubbish and the author is a bad person." This forum is meant for reviews by people who have read the books they're talking about and for people who haven't read them to ask about them. It isn't for general-purpose trashing of books and authors on the basis of second- or third-hand information. Especially not in this case when we have a controversial book whose author is a member of the forum.

Elspeth

Royal Library moderator/TRF admin

Oh, I agree Elspeth!
And, I am thrilled that Trine Villeman is here to chat with everyone about her book, too.
I am looking forward to reading it. First, I have to save up money to order it.

-- Abbie

 

[Villemann]

Oh, I agree Elspeth!
And, I am thrilled that Trine Villeman is here to chat with everyone about her book, too.
I am looking forward to reading it. First, I have to save up money to order it.

-- Abbie

Thanks Abbie! I am here, ready to debate and discuss MY monarchy and all of our monarchies!

 

[grevinnan]

I have to agree. The only person who can decide if he is truly ready to take on this responsibility is Fredrick himself. His wife cannot "make" him do this or "reform" him.

Mary is part of the team. She does not have the luxury of choosing if she wants to or not. Some marriages carries with it inherent responsibilites. Marrying a Crown Prince is definitively one of those marriages. The team of Mary and Frederik will make it or not and the responsibility is theirs to share. The perks of being a crown princess can sometimes come at a very high price. Mary has her work cut out for her.

 

[TLLK]

Mary is part of the team. She does not have the luxury of choosing if she wants to or not. Some marriages carries with it inherent responsibilites. Marrying a Crown Prince is definitively one of those marriages. The team of Mary and Frederik will make it or not and the responsibility is theirs to share. The perks of being a crown princess can sometimes come at a very high price. Mary has her work cut out for her.

Yes, I agree that CP Mary is part of the "team." IMO, the only person who how much effort and enthusiasm is put into his tasks, duties, and appearances is CP Fredrick himself.

 

[HRH Abigail]

Thanks Abbie! I am here, ready to debate and discuss MY monarchy and all of our monarchies!

Nice to see you here, Trine.

I am getting ready to order your book.

Your husband has been most prompt and kindly corresponding to my many questions about postage, packing, and the details of paying for the item.

I would like to add that I have enjoyed seeing you interviewed online, too, about your book. Your poise, in fielding all the criticism leveled at you, has been admirable, I must say.

-- Abbie

 

[Villemann]

Yes, I agree that CP Mary is part of the "team." IMO, the only person who how much effort and enthusiasm is put into his tasks, duties, and appearances is CP Fredrick himself.

Frederik's grandma, the late Queen Ingrid, managed to turn her wayward husband around. Old King Frederik IX was a thirsty fella, who liked a good party, but Ingrid very wisely ruled him with an ironfist in a velvet glove.Ingrid, of course, was a born and bred princess. Mary is not and maybe that is part of the problem! In my book I describe just how robust Ingrid was in her dealings with her husband, but perhaps that strenght came from being a royal herself. I do not envy CP Mary, but she wanted her prince and now it is time to make a king ourt of him!

 

[Villemann]

Nice to see you here, Trine.

I am getting ready to order your book.

Your husband has been most prompt and kindly corresponding to my many questions about postage, packing, and the details of paying for the item.

I would like to add that I have enjoyed seeing you interviewed online, too, about your book. Your poise, in fielding all the criticism leveled at you, has been admirable, I must say.

-- Abbie

Yes, my husband, who is dealing with the sales of 1015, has recently gained a lot of friends all over the world! Being British, he never understood the inner workings of the Danish monasrchy. He does now!

 

[Madame Royale]

but she wanted her prince and now it is time to make a king ourt of him!

You have a reigning Queen, let us not forget. Lets not get ahead of 'ourselves' as seems to be the general ambition of some.

Now it is time to support her husband as Crown Prince, as would be the right and logical thing to do.

 

[Jo of Palatine]

Ingrid, of course, was a born and bred princess. Mary is not and maybe that is part of the problem! In my book I describe just how robust Ingrid was in her dealings with her husband, but perhaps that strenght came from being a royal herself.

That is a form of racism, IMHO, blaming "problems" Mary obviously hasn't when the majority of people in Denmark are concerned, on her not being born a Royal. it's an old mobbing method to blame people for things they cannot change. Mary is not a "princess born and bred" and will never be able to change that. Very telling.

As for her not pushing frederick enough: maybe she at least knows her place as consort of the heir. I bet you'd prefer to have a new Diana in Denmark, one who likes to upstage her more senior Royal relatives/collegues, but so far IMHo Mary behaves with exactly the right kind of respect for the fact that her mother-in-law still is the queen.

 

[Villemann]

You have a reigning Queen, let us not forget. Lets not get ahead of 'ourselves' as seems to be the general ambition of some.

Now it is time to support her husband as Crown Prince, as would be the right and logical thing to do.

Now is the time for CP Mary to lay the foundation in order for CP Frederik to become a good king! if I got a bit ahead of myself there, I apologize!

 

[Villemann]

That is a form of racism, IMHO, blaming "problems" Mary obviously hasn't when the majority of people in Denmark are concerned, on her not being born a Royal. it's an old mobbing method to blame people for things they cannot change. Mary is not a "princess born and bred" and will never be able to change that. Very telling.

As for her not pushing frederick enough: maybe she at least knows her place as consort of the heir. I bet you'd prefer to have a new Diana in Denmark, one who likes to upstage her more senior Royal relatives/collegues, but so far IMHo Mary behaves with exactly the right kind of respect for the fact that her mother-in-law still is the queen.

Racism?Mobbing? I am looking at history and seeing a princess, who managed to do what Mary also - in MY opinion - needs to do. I am not blaming CP Mary for anything. I am merely saying she needs to make a king - start the work now, he is 40 years old - out of her husband. As for Diana, I think she used and abused her obvious skills as a modern princess, but I believe she followed her instincts. Maybe CP Mary should try the same?

 

[Menarue]

One thing I will say for Mary is that perhaps she wasn´t born a princess but she certainly looks like one.

 

[Villemann]

One thing I will say for Mary is that perhaps she wasn´t born a princess but she certainly looks like one.

I agree. She look like a princess. Now it is time for her to put some substance into the work, she is doing. I know it is difficult, but if she trusts herself, I am convinced she can help the Danish monarchy on it's way to reform.

 

[Empress]

Racism?Mobbing? I am looking at history and seeing a princess, who managed to do what Mary also - in MY opinion - needs to do. I am not blaming CP Mary for anything. I am merely saying she needs to make a king - start the work now, he is 40 years old - out of her husband. As for Diana, I think she used and abused her obvious skills as a modern princess, but I believe she followed her instincts. Maybe CP Mary should try the same?

Why should Mary be responsible for making her husband anything? He is an adult isn't he? He is therefore responsible for his own actions. It's not Marys job to make him anything, it's his job. Her job is to support him.

Furthermore, when most of us marry, it's not in order to change the person. We marry them for who they are at the time, and who they will be, of their own accord, in the future. If you marry someone with the intent to change them, you clearly do not love the person that they are when you marry them, and you might as well not get married at all.

On another note, I think that Mary is doing a fine job, as the majority of Danes seem to think. She doesn't overstep her bounds, she stays in the background sometimes, and sometimes she comes to the foreground. It's a modern relationship with the constraints of tradition, and I don't think anyone could or should ask more of her at this time.

 

[Villemann]

Why should Mary be responsible for making her husband anything? He is an adult isn't he? He is therefore responsible for his own actions. It's not Marys job to make him anything, it's his job. Her job is to support him.

Furthermore, when most of us marry, it's not in order to change the person. We marry them for who they are at the time, and who they will be, of their own accord, in the future. If you marry someone with the intent to change them, you clearly do not love the person that they are when you marry them, and you might as well not get married at all.

On another note, I think that Mary is doing a fine job, as the majority of Danes seem to think. She doesn't overstep her bounds, she stays in the background sometimes, and sometimes she comes to the foreground. It's a modern relationship with the constraints of tradition, and I don't think anyone could or should ask more of her at this time.

I think it is fair and square to ask more of your royals, like I am asking of CP Mary, because in the end the monarchy belongs to all of us. Mary and her in-laws inhabit the institution, but financially and emotionally we are all co-owners. Of course she didn't marry CP Frederik to change him, but to support him in his future role. Show me a spouse who wouldn't pick up on his or her partners flaws and try to fix them? Naturally Mary can not give her husband a full make over. He is who he is, but surely she can help him become more confident and comfortable with his position. I don't understand why that is such a sore issue with some people. Where is the harm in suggesting that Mary has to make a king out of her husband? She is the obvious choice for that.

 

[Chimene]

Where is the harm in suggesting that Mary has to make a king out of her husband? She is the obvious choice for that.

There is no ham at all, but I'm just not sure what you are suggesting is a realistic expectation. I don't how Mary is to change her husband into a king when she's only became a royal a few years ago. The task of transforming Frederik (if there is even a need) should come from his mother and the advisors at the palace, non?

 

[Villemann]

There is no ham at all, but I'm just not sure what you are suggesting is a realistic expectation. I don't how Mary is to change her husband into a king when she's only became a royal a few years ago. The task of transforming Frederik (if there is even a need) should come from his mother and the advisors at the palace, non?

Well, forget about the Queen. She has been such an absent parent - as described in my book - that she does not have that kind of influence over her son. Advisors? Yep, and things are looking up here, but I would still say that Mary is his nearest and dearest and therefor the one, who can install confidence in him - or perhaps just make sure he gets all the professional help he needs? As any wife would do for her husband. Isn't that what marriage is all about? Helping each other?

 

[Empress]

Sorry, but generally the things that are changeable by another person is only habits. Like plesase pick up your clothes from the bedroom floor. Not, I think that you need more confidence. That sort of change needs to come from within yourself.

I fail to understand why you are putting all of the onus on Mary to change Frederik and little on Frederik himself. Again, he is an adult and it's his job, so therefore he should prepare himself for it, and if as you suggest, he is too immature or not confident enough, or whatever the case may be, it is again his problem to change, with Mary's support of course, but it's not her job to change him.

 

[Villemann]

Sorry, but generally the things that are changeable by another person is only habits. Like plesase pick up your clothes from the bedroom floor. Not, I think that you need more confidence. That sort of change needs to come from within yourself.

I fail to understand why you are putting all of the onus on Mary to change Frederik and little on Frederik himself. Again, he is an adult and it's his job, so therefore he should prepare himself for it, and if as you suggest, he is too immature or not confident enough, or whatever the case may be, it is again his problem to change, with Mary's support of course, but it's not her job to change him.

It is part of any Crown Princesses jobdescription to make a good king out of her husband. A Crown Princess is a corporate wife. CP Mary happens to be married to a prince, who can not change himself. He does not have that kind of insight to be able to do so in MY opinion. The burden falls to his wife, tough, and I don't envy CP Mary, but if she can't install discipline, confidence, selfesteem whatever - then ,who can? It is not only Frederik's problem that he can't turn himself around and do his job properly - it's everybody's problem. If Frederik carries on the was he has for the past 10 years, I seriously fear for the Danish monarchy. He is popular now, but will it last? Will the respect for him and the royal house last? I don't think. Someone needs to do something. That someone is Mary. It comes with the territory, when you marry a prince.