Relationships of Prince Charles and His Parents

[Marty91charmed]

I very much agree with everything that has been said about Charles and his parents. With the queen it was a matter of mindset, age, duty and personality, while with Prince Philip I get a sense of discomfort from Charles as a child. Now tat he is an man, I think he has understood, if not accepted, the weird behaviour that he felt as a child around his parents.
In short, I think that grown-up Charles has a better relationship with his parents that the child and teenage Charles.

 

[tommy100]

I think it is pretty well know that he didn't get on well with Philip as a kid. And I think the queen was (a) awkward and shy and not very affectionate in any kind of physical way, and (b) very devoted ot her husband.
I think as a young woman she was wrapped up with Philip and perhaps wasn't ready for motherhood.. and was the kind of woman who was "content to leave childcare to nanny". There is a story - don't know how true - that when Diana was looking after the children because it was her nanny's day off, the queen said "I don't know Why Diana has to do this, there are plenty of housemaids."
I think she was a lot more "motherly" and affectionate to Andrew and Edward when they came along, but with Anne and Charles she was not very tactile. I don't know if she would ever be comfortable with expressing affection, esp physically.
I think Charles IS a very conscientious nervy sort of man, even now. He wants to do the right thing, agonises over what it should be, and as a little boy, he was problaby VERY nervous of PHilp and perhaps of his mother, who seemed distant and in his child mind, didn't protect him form Philip (or problaby the unpleasant Anne bullying him too).
I must look at the video properly another time, but yes I think he was a bit afraid of his parents, and felt more comfortable with his loving grandma, and she loved him because he reminded her of her shy seflf doubting husband.
I think in the present, he has grown closer to his parents, he understands them better and gets on with them, esp his mother...

I am intrigued at what evidence there is to suggest 'unpleasant Anne' bullied her brother? I've never heard this before

 

[AdmirerUS]

The QMQE was naturally more maternal. Her eyes light up whenever she saw children. I don't think QEII was as maternal as her mother, and watching clios of QEII and her mother, you can quickly see this.

What different days! A ceremony with all and sundry dress up and polished to welcome her home - and a carriage ride to boot.

I think learning to never walk in front of mummy must have been weird for little people, and clearly, Anne had not yet mastered the technique.

Philip's smile in this video is so endearing!

 

[Denville]

I am intrigued at what evidence there is to suggest 'unpleasant Anne' bullied her brother? I've never heard this before

Im sure that someone has mentioned it, that she used to "beat him up" as a kid. She's a tough unsympathetic person in general, and he was a nervy shy awkward child.. I can quite see her bossing him around at the least. Having watched that video now, yes i can see that Charles is nervous and unsure of himself... very much so.
Im sure his grandmother was one of the few people that he felt safe and comfortable with as a child...

 

[Pranter]

Meh...siblings fight and carry on, normal stuff.

However Anne is very much like her father and Charles has had a strained relationship with him at times from what I've read/seen. Stands to reason that her personality wouldn't have meshed as well with Charles's back then.

I do think today they have a cordial relationship...based on how they interact in public settings.


LaRae

 

[Denville]

Its not "fighting" if one child is beating another up. No idea what they think of each other nowadays, but as children, I think that Anne was indeed like Philip, and Philip bullied Charles. He is sensitive, and gentle and Anne is insensitive and rude by nature. He wasn't really sporty as a kid I think but was pushed inot it by Philip, while Anne was naturally fond of all sorts of things like that and was probably her father's favourite. the queen wasn't very doting on Charles and he msut have felt very left out.. if he hadn't had his nanny and grandmother.

 

[tommy100]

Hmmm I don't think it was as bad as all that, they seem close now and their children are very close. I think its pretty hard for someone who's never met Anne to say she is insensitive and rude, she may appear that way in public but no one knows for sure what she is like in private. The footage we saw on the BBC docu from the early days of their childhood shows two children very happy in each others company and having fun, all children argue and fight and yes they are both extreme personalities so I'm for their childhood it was quite heated at times.

 

[Mirabel]

I've always seen Phillip as a bully; perhaps because he was never as important as his wife, he turned into a domestic tyrant.

Charles did not have a happy childhood. For one thing, his school was a bad fit and he was not permitted to change to a happier venue. (I blame Phillip for that). He had such a mindset about QUITTERS- remember Edward and his marine training?

Father and son just haven't much in common, and the resentments of youth linger for years after people might be expected to just get over it.

 

[Denville]

I think its pretty hard for someone who's never met Anne to say she is insensitive and rude, she may appear that way in public but no one knows for sure what she is like in private. The footage we saw on the BBC docu from the early days of their childhood shows two children very happy in each others company and having fun, all children argue and fight and yes they are both extreme personalities so I'm for their childhood it was quite heated at times.

er well if she's rude in public, where she should be trying to seem pleasant, she's hardly going to restrain herself in private.
and Philip is a bit of a bully, too...

 

[Osipi]

I've just always viewed Anne as being a serious, staid and sedate kind of person who isn't frivolous in the least bit. When she is in public, she's there for a reason and that reason is first and foremost in her mind.

Its just her personality.

 

[Denville]

Yes a grim determination to do her job, even if she clearly does not like the public. I really feel that she screams "I hate being on show, I hate the royal job and these tiresome people".
Charles, for all his awkwardness, clearly DOES care about people. he can't show it easily but he does what he does, because he cares, and wants to do good for his country and for people in general. He can be bad tempered at times, like the best of us, but not habitually grumpy..
I agreed with I think it was Curryong who said that as a child it was obvious he was a nervous litte boy who was anxous to get things right.. and In a way he still is.

I've Father and son just haven't much in common, and the resentments of youth linger for years after people might be expected to just get over it.

I think Philip is very often right in theory, but his rough manner makes people who are less "tough" feel battered by him. I think he's right about Edward quitting the Marines, he could have stuck out the training. (and God knows Ed hasn't done anything much since then). And he meant well by sending C to Gordonstoun, it was away from the Press, it was a school he had done well at and he believed that it would let Charles be an ordinary boy. But it wasn't a good fit for Charles, he'd have been better at Eton where there were lots of royal pupils and where being artistic or wanting to study the humanitiies wasn't considered odd or less important than being tough or good at sports.
I think Chalrles would have done better there, and come out less tensed up and resenting his father for sending him there.

 

[Curryong]

Anne is one of the busiest members of the BRF and is very businesslike about her royal duties, but she can be a bit, shall we say, brusque, especially with members of the public.

There was a story I read years ago about an old dear who had stood for ages to meet her at one of her engagements, carrying a little basket of flowers from her own garden that she had made up into a nice little display for Anne. HRH took the gift but apparently wasn't very gracious on hearing of the effort, just said "What a waste of time!"
This left the old lady feeling a bit deflated and upset.

Surely one of the major qualities needed for a member of royalty at engagements is to leave members of the public who go to see them with a feeling of excitement, magic almost, a feeling that the Royal seen was not only relatable and friendly but also gracious and cheerful? Also leaving the public with a wish to see them again next time they come to that area. That's how I feel, anyway.

 

[Denville]

Anne is one of the busiest members of the BRF and is very businesslike about her royal duties, but she can be a bit, shall we say, brusque, especially with members of the public.

Thereonly relatable and friendly but also gracious and cheerful? Also leaving the public with a wish to see them again next time they come to that area. That's how I feel, anyway.

As I recall that story, it was reported at Christmas, and I know i saw it in the papers.. that an old lady had been waiting outside the church to see the RF, (I think she had soem flowers) and told Anne that she'd been waiting for ages.. and Anne said "well that was a stupid thing to do" or soemthing like that.
And she does stuff like that a lot.
I dont see much point in doing a lot of engagements if you are frequently rude to the people who come to see you. Frankly I'd be only too glad to see Anne disappear from the royal rota.. She makes it so obvious that she does not like the job, or the people and she can harldy bother to try and put on a polite face a lot of the time

 

[Lumutqueen]

The views on people from a snapshot from crappy tabloid information is positively hilarious.

It's amazing how it's one rule for one, and one for another. When Philip is honest/brusque it's amusing. When Anne is too the point, she's rude.

Anne knows who she is, and she does her duty and if she didn't want to she probably wouldn't.


Also; since when was Anne Charles' parent? Check the thread title people.

 

[Curryong]

I can remember Charles visiting a country house when he was a teenager and it turned out there was mumps in the family. He was past puberty then and apparently his minders were beside themselves because of the obvious implications on the Royal fertility if he contracted it, which he didn't!

Chicken pox, measles, scarlet fever etc whipped through boarding schools in those days, probably. The Queen was so removed from this, she probably never had those usual childhood illnesses, tucked away as she was at home.

Charles was the first direct heir to the throne to go to boarding school on a full time basis from an early age. The future Edward VIII did have some experience of it when he attended naval college with his brother Bertie, but he was quite a few years older.

I think it was good for Charles to go away to school but I certainly don't think it was a happy experience at the time. Philip's choices of his old schools for Charles didn't resonate with his son. Philip's personality is almost the direct opposite of Charles in practically every way.

 

[MARG]

While Philip and Charles may seem polar opposites, it is interesting to note that both are accomplished artists. This makes me wonder just how much else they have in common and because we haven't got the faintest clue, we relegate it to a Black Swan.

The truth about these two men's relationship may be far more complex and intriguing than any of us could possibly imagine.

 

[Curryong]

I do think they are both deeply religious and share an interest in the diverse religions of the world, actually. This might be inherited from Prince Philip's mother Princess Alice, or even from Queen Victoria's daughter Alice, who was Philip's great-grandmother. I was surprised to read in a Giles Brandreth biography years ago that Philip has a large library containing works on philosophy and religion.

However, I don't know whether the two men are comfortable enough in each other's company to have long philosophical discussions. There have been too many witnesses over the years (not just tabloid gossip) to Prince Philip's downright irritation with his son, with his hectoring and taunting of Charles, even the adult Charles, in front of others, to make that more than a remote possibility. Philip might have mellowed with age, but...

 

[Denville]

I tink he has and so ha Charles. I think when he was in his 20s he ws at odds with his father, not surprising.. and in his 30s, I think his unhappy marriage made him snarlier and not close to his parents. I'm sure that Philip was then saying things like "take a mistress and shut up whining" or " DONT take a mistress in case of scandal but just shut up whining."
I don't think that Phil is as "non intellectual" as his public image suggests, I think he's quite intelligent and interested in ideas, like Charles, but unlike Charles he is more practical and not likely to get bogged down in emotion and sentiment.
I'd say as C has grown older and is now happily married, he is calmer and problaby gets on better with botht parents...

 

[Dee Anna]

Charles and Anne probably lost out in the parental attention stakes as young children when Elizabeth was thrust onto the throne at an earlier than assumed age, given her father had died a relatively young man.
There was quite a lot to take on and family whilst not ignored probably had to take a place down the attention table abiet in exellent non parental care.
When the Queen and Duke had their "second" family, they were in a much more secure position and again, probably had more time to give to Andrew and Edward. By then Charles and Anne were old enough not to need the same attention babies and toddlers do.

 

[Denville]

Cha
There was quite a lot to take on and family whilst not ignored probably had to take a place down the attention table abiet in exellent non parental care.
W.

I think that they were if not exactly ignored by their parents not doted on either. It wasn't just after she became Queen, she left them home and lived in Malta with Philip, for a while.
By the standards of the time, I suppose Phil and the queen weren't that different tot many upper class parents..but I think that Charles was a shy soft child who felt excluded by his parents.
Then Andrew came along and seems to have been the queen's favourite, and Edward was the youngest..So i should think that Charles felt short changed all the way. Anne was Philip's favourite and probably didn't mind her parents not being around as much as Charles did. Then Chas saw his 2 younger brothters getting a lot of attention and affection that he hadn't had.

 

[Osipi]

Having raised three children, I heard an expression once that has stuck with me. It goes "The job of a parent is to become unnecessary to the child". Using this as a means of measure, both Philip and Elizabeth have done an excellent job raising Charles. He is perhaps the most well prepared Heir Apparent in the world.

 

[Denville]

IS he? I don't think they did a great job. I think that they made him shyer and more nervy than he needed to be, and left him with something of a whiny personality which has put people off him. And I think that's because they sent him somewhere cold showery like Gordonstoun where he felt lonely and disliked and that's made him want a lot of fuss and attention made of him.
Had he gone somewhere like Eton he would have met people who were more intellectual and interested in his interests, and where he would have been one of many royals. whereas at Gord he was shunned by people who felt that if they were nice to him it was sucking up to him because of his position.

 

[Osipi]

When you really think about it, parents, no matter if they're doting or absent in a child's life really don't have that much influence on a child's basic temperament or their natural inclinations. However, parents can take steps to help the child deal with certain issues such as insecurities which I believe was a big part of Charles' childhood. Perhaps this was the intent behind Philip insisting on Gordonstoun. Help Charles to "buck up and face the world around him".

Although Charles hated Gordonstoun with a passion, there are life long habits that came from that education. He still takes cold showers and is passionate about keeping fit and takes brisk walks for relaxation. One of the most amusing stories about Charles' school days there was when he ducked into a local pub and being asked what he wanted to drink, he replied "cherry brandy" as that's what someone would go to a pub for. Definitely underage, the barkeep felt he couldn't refuse Charles.

 

[Denville]

Yes thtat was when he was being harassed by the press and he didn't know what to ask for but he had had cherry brandy out hunting.
I think that Philip felt that because Gord had been good for him, it would be good for Charles but I think it exacerbated his faults, and made him weaker and more "wobbly" than he might be. I feel had he had more sympathetic parents, he might have developed more self confidence and not felt the need for being spoiled, and fussed over that he has.
Of course Phil MEANT well but he is a bti of a bully and didn't think that he might be hurting his son, by "toughening him up."
And I do like Charles, he is a decent guy and well meaning but for a while, I think that his weak side was very much in evidence during his bad marriage and it lost him sympathy. He was unhappy, and he whined. And he was seen by the public as needing servants to do everything, which lost him respect and liking..

 

[Roslyn]

He still takes cold showers, voluntarily? I think that's the strangest piece of information I have ever heard about Charles. Why on earth would anyone who didn't have to, have a cold shower? I'm shivering just thinking about it. I suppose that's one way to guarantee that no-one will ever want to shower with you.

 

[Denville]

He may find it refreshing. People do all sorts (IMO) of ridiculous things to relax.

 

[Osipi]

He still takes cold showers, voluntarily? I think that's the strangest piece of information I have ever heard about Charles. Why on earth would anyone who didn't have to, have a cold shower? I'm shivering just thinking about it. I suppose that's one way to guarantee that no-one will ever want to shower with you.

I'm trying desperately to remember just where I read that tidbit of information and coming up with a blank. I'm thinking it was the Dimbleby biography. He did, however, start a "snub the tub" thing. He even recycles bath water to water the plants.

Prince Charles urges British families to 'snub the bathtub' | Daily Mail Online

In a nutshell, a lot of Charles' childhood had a lot of impact on the man he is today. There were both positives and negatives that came out of his relationship with his parents as a child and as an adult. I think that can be true for just about anyone though.

 

[Denville]

I suppose that even if he hated Gordonstoun he got into various habits there, such as taking a lot of violent exercise, and he has problaby found that a stress buster over the Years and stuck with it. I'd hate it but that's him.

 

[Osipi]

This man is always on the go. Camilla joked once that on his birthday, she'd have to yell "Happy Birthday" to him as he rushed past her to get to somewhere else.

One thing he did inherit from his parents is a very strong sense of duty and tradition. He has the gentler nature of his mother but the "get things done" attitude from his father.

 

[Denville]

I think he's much more like his grandfather George VI than his parents. (well I think there's a bit of Philip in him, in that Philip is Not at heart such a clunking anti intellectual hearty type as he seems).
But the queen is also "no nonsense", not very emotional and not IMO at all intellectuallly minded. She's shy like Charles but she's not someone who tries to get things done or has any ideas of wanting to do something special with her life as he has.
But Charles is like George VI in that he's shy, awkward, self doubting, nervous and in need of someone to make a fuss of him and love him...and crabby tempered when he is frustrated. The queen Mother loved him especially because she saw that in him, that he was very like her husband. And she provided some of the loving and fussing that Charles didn't get from his parents.
then unlike his grandfather Chas married a woman who needed a lot of loving herself and wasn't able to give him the attention he problaby felt he wanted. Camilla I think is loving and makes a fuss of him but in a light jolly way, joking him out of bad moods and being warm and cheerful
.