The Royal Forums Coat of Arms


Join The Royal Forums Today
Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
  #201  
Old 08-02-2005, 10:53 PM
Serene Highness
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Dallas, United States
Posts: 1,483
The reason why Diana became bulimic was b/c Charles said that she was a bit chubby. THanks to her insecurity she tried to lose way, but in an unsafe way.
__________________

__________________
*Under Construction*
  #202  
Old 08-02-2005, 11:19 PM
ysbel's Avatar
Heir Apparent
TRF Author
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New York, United States
Posts: 5,377
Hi Reina,

Sadly eating disorders doesn't work that way. They manifest themselves in the early years of puberty when girls bodies change although it may not be noticeable to others yet.

Charles may have said she was a bit chubby which would have been a bit insensitive and made it worse but this in itself would not have caused the bulimia.
__________________

  #203  
Old 08-02-2005, 11:34 PM
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: ***, United States
Posts: 16,873
Quote:
Originally Posted by Reina
The reason why Diana became bulimic was b/c Charles said that she was a bit chubby. THanks to her insecurity she tried to lose way, but in an unsafe way.
There's some evidence that her eating disorders started some time before she ever met Charles. It depends whose story you believe. She isn't the only one in the family to have the problem either.
  #204  
Old 08-03-2005, 12:22 AM
Serene Highness
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,090
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elspeth
There's some evidence that her eating disorders started some time before she ever met Charles. It depends whose story you believe. She isn't the only one in the family to have the problem either.
Please elaborate...
I've never heard of any evidence of the beginings of Diana's eating disorders before Charles' comments and the pressure of the harsh spotlight.
  #205  
Old 08-03-2005, 12:59 AM
ysbel's Avatar
Heir Apparent
TRF Author
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New York, United States
Posts: 5,377
Hi Elspeth and lashinka :)

lashinka I don't have any personal knowledge that Diana had an eating disorder before meeting Charles. I simply have an understanding of the disorders after being in close contact with women who had it and their families.

Its a major misconception that one event or a single period of stress brings on an eating disorder and this misconception has caused a lot of pain and anguish for both those who suffer from the disorder and also to their families.

Anorexia and bulimia are both an attempt to gain control and the signs first appear in puberty when girls' bodies change and a sense of not being in control of your body develops. All girls go through feeling a lack of control during puberty but most get through the phase without an eating disorder. Its possible for girls to display symptoms of both bulimia and anorexia but one behavior usually dominates.

When Diana was pregnant with William it was thought she was anorexic but with her bulimia was the primary disorder. Eating disorders usually appear in the 'good' girl of the family. They put a lot of pressure on themselves to be good and dutiful. From the accounts of Diana's childhood, she was the good girl of the family and her kindness and dutifulness were admired by the Royal Family.

For Diana to show signs of anorexia and then develop bulimia so soon after her marriage, makes it highly unlikely (although I guess not impossible) for it to have developed only after she met Charles and been put under the pressures of worldwide fame. I guess it can happen but that's generally not how these disorders work.

The point I wanted to make was that the effect on her family - both her own family and the Royal Family cannot be underestimated. Its very frightening to see this up close and people don't know how to cope. From the outside it looks like they're acting incredibly insensitive but its very hard to imagine what its like being in the situation.
  #206  
Old 08-03-2005, 01:19 AM
Serene Highness
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 1,090
Right, so negative weight comments and the pressure of new found fame could have been the final thing to push her over the edge. Issues before she met Charles within her own family and friends that she may not have been able to control may have contributed to the final outcome.

The BRF & the Spencer famalies should have both educated themselves in this matter. Sure it's a hard thing to deal with, a hard thing to watch a loved one go through but if a family member had cancer or another sickness surley they would have done the best that they could have. In my opinion I don't think that they did very much for Diana's disorder. I don't think that they took it seriously. She really needed help, strangers off the streets would have given her more help.

This may be a little outspoken but I feel you always help the ones you love & Charles really did not love Diana. The Spencer side may not have been fully aware of Diana's bulimia. Had Camilla been ill Charles would have stepped up to the plate & made sure of her recovery.
  #207  
Old 08-03-2005, 02:10 AM
tiaraprin's Avatar
Royal Highness
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Near NY City, United States
Posts: 1,824
Quote:
Originally Posted by lashinka2002
Right, so negative weight comments and the pressure of new found fame could have been the final thing to push her over the edge. Issues before she met Charles within her own family and friends that she may not have been able to control may have contributed to the final outcome.

The BRF & the Spencer famalies should have both educated themselves in this matter. Sure it's a hard thing to deal with, a hard thing to watch a loved one go through but if a family member had cancer or another sickness surley they would have done the best that they could have. In my opinion I don't think that they did very much for Diana's disorder. I don't think that they took it seriously. She really needed help, strangers off the streets would have given her more help.

This may be a little outspoken but I feel you always help the ones you love & Charles really did not love Diana. The Spencer side may not have been fully aware of Diana's bulimia. Had Camilla been ill Charles would have stepped up to the plate & made sure of her recovery.

I do believe Diana had some trouble with eating disorders before meeting Charles. Her sister Sarah was an anorexic and Charles actually helped her in her recovery. Too bad he couldn't help his own wife!!

I believe upon becoming engaged to him and being left alone to wander Buckingham Palace is when it went full force. She was a shy, inexperienced girl who was being ignored by all, including Charles. Bulimia was her way of gaining control in her life--eating disorders are usually caused by this issue. The world of the anorexic/bulimic is spinning out of control and she cannot stop it. So what does she do?? She gains control over the one thing she can--her weight. That is where a sufferer feels like they have power over what happens in their life.

I do not doubt if Camilla was suffering from this, Charles would have been frantic getting her help. For Diana, he read one book and called in Sir Laurens Van Der Post. Yeah, that was really going to help the situation.
  #208  
Old 08-03-2005, 03:37 AM
Warren's Avatar
Administrator in Memoriam
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 15,469
Doctors don't tell

Quote:
Originally Posted by tiaraprin
For Diana, he read one book and called in Sir Laurens Van Der Post. Yeah, that was really going to help the situation.
We have no knowledge of what medical assistance was requested; we have no idea of what was discussed with the physicians and specialists who attend members of the Royal Family. As far as I know none of these doctors and specialists have published their memoirs giving details of their Royal patients, nor sold tidbits to the tabloids.

We will probably never know what assistance and treatment was offered and given to Diana in relation to her physical and emotional difficulties. As much as we would like to know all the details, not everyone tells.
.
  #209  
Old 08-03-2005, 09:41 AM
ysbel's Avatar
Heir Apparent
TRF Author
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New York, United States
Posts: 5,377
Quote:
Originally Posted by lashinka2002
In my opinion I don't think that they did very much for Diana's disorder. I don't think that they took it seriously. She really needed help, strangers off the streets would have given her more help.
I would agree with you that they probably didn't take it seriously.

This is very common in families with this disorder. The family's first reaction is that the good girl is being willful and misbehaving so they become angry. They try to pressure the woman to behave normally and that makes the situation worse. In many cases, when it doesn't work they mentally give up and pull back. Incidentally it is usually strangers of the street or someone not well known to the family that can make a difference.

As Warren says, we'll never know for sure but there are some predictable reactions based on study of families with the disorder. From what we can tell of the Royal Family's reactions it supports the theory that they acted much as other families did.

Very occasionally a woman may marry a man who has the strength to be able to take on the challenge and provide real help and comfort to his wife but that's the very rare exception not the rule. Its easy to say the Spencers and the Royals should have done better but from the little evidence we have, it seems they did what most other families faced with the situation do.

I do remember that Diana saw a therapist on the advice of the Royal Family. The Queen Mother had seen a therapist and suggested it. But not all therapists have experience with eating disorders so it may not have helped that much.
  #210  
Old 08-03-2005, 09:52 AM
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: ***, United States
Posts: 16,873
Quote:
Originally Posted by lashinka2002
Please elaborate...
I've never heard of any evidence of the beginings of Diana's eating disorders before Charles' comments and the pressure of the harsh spotlight.
I don't remember which book it was, but at least one book about her said that she started showing signs of binge eating and possibly purging while still at school. The pressures of such a high-profile engagement while she was still young would have no doubt triggered any latent tendency to bulimia, but it sounds as though it was there from her adolescence.

My understanding of a disease like bulimia and anorexia is that it would take a lot more than an off-hand comment like Charles's alleged one to create bulimia in a previously healthy person. That sounds like a bit of judicious rewriting of history to me. It's quite possible that he was dense enough to say it, but it wouldn't have been the only thing going on.
  #211  
Old 08-03-2005, 01:42 PM
tiaraprin's Avatar
Royal Highness
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Near NY City, United States
Posts: 1,824
Quote:
Originally Posted by Warren
We have no knowledge of what medical assistance was requested; we have no idea of what was discussed with the physicians and specialists who attend members of the Royal Family. As far as I know none of these doctors and specialists have published their memoirs giving details of their Royal patients, nor sold tidbits to the tabloids.

We will probably never know what assistance and treatment was offered and given to Diana in relation to her physical and emotional difficulties. As much as we would like to know all the details, not everyone tells.
.

Sir Laurens Van Der Post is not a doctor, he was Charles' philosophical guru. As to Charles reading a book on eating disorders, that has been written in several books talking about the marriage.
  #212  
Old 08-03-2005, 08:25 PM
Alicky's Avatar
Courtier
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Somewhere, United States
Posts: 579
Lashinka, Diana was famous amongst her friends for never seeming to gain weight from the copious amounts of foods that she ate, and they noticed how after coming back from a trip how much weight she had suddenly lost (in the late seventies).

And not only are psychiatrists perplexed by Di's claims that her bulimia started all of the sudden with her marriage (as eating disorders don't just pop up at that age with no prior history of eating problems) but she said herself that her bulimia started in the mid seventies in 1997 at Roehampton Priory.

"It started because Sarah was anorexic and I idolized her so much that I wanted to be like her. I can only put it down to me wanting to emulate everything she did."

As far as Di and Charles's love, I think there was a mutual affection between the two for quite a while, dozens of pictures attest to this. But I think she was naive and in love with a Prince, someone she had idolized since she was very young, not the real man. I don't think she was deeply in love with him till the day she died, you don't wage such a holy war of slandering, propaganda and media manipulation against someone you love deeply. Not that Charles's camp didn't work hard against her too, but I don't claim that he was deeply in love with her either.

Answering yes to a proposal and getting married is optional, especially to someone who repeatedly said that she knew for sure in the months leading up to the actual marriage that she was the lamb to the slaughter.
  #213  
Old 08-04-2005, 02:35 AM
tiaraprin's Avatar
Royal Highness
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Near NY City, United States
Posts: 1,824
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alicky
Lashinka, Diana was famous amongst her friends for never seeming to gain weight from the copious amounts of foods that she ate, and they noticed how after coming back from a trip how much weight she had suddenly lost (in the late seventies).

And not only are psychiatrists perplexed by Di's claims that her bulimia started all of the sudden with her marriage (as eating disorders don't just pop up at that age with no prior history of eating problems) but she said herself that her bulimia started in the mid seventies in 1997 at Roehampton Priory.

"It started because Sarah was anorexic and I idolized her so much that I wanted to be like her. I can only put it down to me wanting to emulate everything she did."

As far as Di and Charles's love, I think there was a mutual affection between the two for quite a while, dozens of pictures attest to this. But I think she was naive and in love with a Prince, someone she had idolized since she was very young, not the real man. I don't think she was deeply in love with him till the day she died, you don't wage such a holy war of slandering, propaganda and media manipulation against someone you love deeply. Not that Charles's camp didn't work hard against her too, but I don't claim that he was deeply in love with her either.

Answering yes to a proposal and getting married is optional, especially to someone who repeatedly said that she knew for sure in the months leading up to the actual marriage that she was the lamb to the slaughter.
And when Diana told her sisters she wanted to call it off the refrain was "Too late Duch, your face is on the tea towels now." Diana was confused and bewildered. In her naive way, she thought if she married him, he would change. A very large and naive mistake on Diana's part and all it brought her was misery. But at her age and how inexperienced she was, it is no wonder how it happened.
  #214  
Old 08-04-2005, 03:35 AM
Warren's Avatar
Administrator in Memoriam
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 15,469
Doctors on call

Quote:
Originally Posted by tiaraprin
Sir Laurens Van Der Post is not a doctor, he was Charles' philosophical guru. As to Charles reading a book on eating disorders, that has been written in several books talking about the marriage.
That may well be true but my point is that we don't know, and probably never will know, what medical advice and treatment was sought for, or by, Diana.

One imagines that the best Harley Street specialists would be available to members of the Royal Family (and aristocratic families), and it would be unreasonable to assume that no-one from either side (Windsor or Spencer), let alone the Princess of Wales herself, would not have consulted with them at some stage. She would of course have had her personal physician; unless this doctor was negligent Diana would have been referred to appropriate specialists.
.
  #215  
Old 08-04-2005, 08:50 AM
Alicky's Avatar
Courtier
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Somewhere, United States
Posts: 579
Quote:
Originally Posted by tiaraprin
And when Diana told her sisters she wanted to call it off the refrain was "Too late Duch, your face is on the tea towels now." Diana was confused and bewildered. In her naive way, she thought if she married him, he would change. A very large and naive mistake on Diana's part and all it brought her was misery. But at her age and how inexperienced she was, it is no wonder how it happened.
I'm sorry, but "Too late Duch, your face is already on the tea towels," is hardly a gun to the head. And if Diana was so naive and bewildered(yet was perceptive enough to "know" she was the lamb to the slaughter and doomed) and had such unrealistic expectations about being a princess and being married to Charles, that is nobody's fault but her own. Like I said, it was optional to accept his proposal, and nobody forced her to walk down that isle.
  #216  
Old 08-04-2005, 11:06 AM
una una is offline
Gentry
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: london, United Kingdom
Posts: 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by tiaraprin
Sir Laurens Van Der Post is not a doctor, he was Charles' philosophical guru. As to Charles reading a book on eating disorders, that has been written in several books talking about the marriage.
After van der Post, I think they called in a psychiatrist to Balmoral, who visited Charles and Diana, then spoke to Diana alone over a few days (trying to make an assessment I guess). Later she went to a specialist in London who prescribed pills for depression and anxiety and recommended a female friend come to Balmoral. I think Diana refused the medicine because of the baby. After the birth, she had more treatment for post natal depression.

As far as I remember bulimia wasn't generally known about in 1981. Her footman hadn't heard of it. That must have added to the confusion.
  #217  
Old 08-04-2005, 11:22 AM
Alicky's Avatar
Courtier
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Somewhere, United States
Posts: 579
Apparently Charles brought various psychiatrists to Diana in the early years, and they did want to give her prescriptions to aid in her mood swings and self-mutilating behavior, but she was paranoid and convinced that the RF just wanted to shut her up with pills so she took nothing.
  #218  
Old 08-04-2005, 01:00 PM
Courtier
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Montreal, Canada
Posts: 776
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alicky
"As far as Di and Charles's love, I think there was a mutual affection between the two for quite a while, dozens of pictures attest to this. But I think she was naive and in love with a Prince, someone she had idolized since she was very young, not the real man. I don't think she was deeply in love with him till the day she died, you don't wage such a holy war of slandering, propaganda and media manipulation against someone you love deeply. Not that Charles's camp didn't work hard against her too, but I don't claim that he was deeply in love with her either.

Answering yes to a proposal and getting married is optional, especially to someone who repeatedly said that she knew for sure in the months leading up to the actual marriage that she was the lamb to the slaughter.
I will always be surprised and suspicious of young women marrying much older men with great power... Too many times, the young woman is psychologically vulnerable to start with and her marriage to a powerful figure doesn't help at all, quite the contrary. Margaret Sinclair, with her marriage with Canadian Prime Minister Pierre Elliott Trudeau in the 70s, is another perfect example of a naive romantic girl marrying her hero then losing her illusions and turning vindictive. We can only extrapolate that with time, Diana would have heal her wounds and find peace in her heart and for her ex-husband, like Margaret did.
  #219  
Old 08-04-2005, 01:48 PM
ysbel's Avatar
Heir Apparent
TRF Author
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: New York, United States
Posts: 5,377
Bulimia and anorexia are particularly difficult to treat even if you have the right specialists involved. Families of the sufferers need a lot of support too because dealing with it that close to you is very emotionally draining.

I think both the Spencers and the Royal Family pushed this marriage and that was a mistake. The Spencers had had their share of public and nasty family spats, particularly the divorce between Diana's parents. In addition to Diana's young age, I always wondered why her family situation wasn't a warning sign to the Royals. When Diana conducted a public battle with the Royal Family she was just doing what her parents had done before.

At any rate, I think the Royal Family has some problems with the way they are choosing their spouses. There seems to be prejudice in Britain against a member of the Royal Family marrying a non-Brit. When Charles and Diana married, the British press was fawning over the fact that she was an English princess. I personally found that offensive.

Its also problematic. In Britain, the Royals mainly socialize with the aristocracy and the British aristocracy has enough history of scandals, affairs, ruined marriages, and multiple marriages, and emotional neglect of children to make the emotional health of any girl coming out of this gene pool questionable at best. The Spencers are relatively more healthy than their close relatives, the Dukes of Marlborough so you can imagine how many problems the Marlboroughs have.

One thing has definitely come out of the Royal Marriages of the 90s. Any woman that marries into this family has got to have the thick skin of an elephant and be successful in internal politics. Marrying into the Royal Family is more a job than a marriage. Its similar to taking a job in a company in a highly charged political atmosphere where your job security depends on knowing how make your way among the key players.

Camilla seems to know how to play the internal politics within the Royal Family. I don't know about Sophie. But it will be interesting to see who the younger royals, ie., William and Harry end up marrying.
  #220  
Old 08-04-2005, 02:16 PM
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: ***, United States
Posts: 16,873
Well, with luck things will have changed somewhat before then. I think that with the Queen Mother living so long and being so dominant, old-fashioned standards were encouraged long past the time when they were actually relevant. Between that situation and the nature and background of the Queen's senior advisers, the royal family was caught in a time warp for too much of the later part of the 20th century. I wouldn't be surprised to see that changing somewhat as the Princes become more senior and have more knowledge of thew world outside the Palace and Household.
__________________

Closed Thread

Tags
camilla, diana princess of wales, duchess of cornwall, prince charles, prince of wales, princess diana, relationships


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Diana/Charles/Camilla's Relationships Part 2 Warren The Prince of Wales and the Duchess of Cornwall 935 12-07-2005 06:49 PM
The Great Baby Guessing Challenge Part 4 Alexandria General Royal Discussion Archive 17 05-16-2005 08:02 PM
The Great Baby Guessing Challenge Part 3 Alexandria General Royal Discussion Archive 24 04-10-2005 06:33 PM
The Great Baby Guessing Challenge Part 2 Alexandria General Royal Discussion Archive 7 03-06-2005 11:20 AM
King Carl XVI Gustaf and Queen Silvia, Current Events Part 1: November 2002-June 2004 Josefine Current Events Archive 300 06-12-2004 08:13 AM




Popular Tags
america american archie mountbatten-windsor asia asian baby names birth britain britannia british royal family camilla camilla parker-bowles camilla parker bowles carolin china chinese colorblindness commonwealth countries coronation customs daisy doge of venice dresses duchess of sussex duke of cambridge duke of sussex elizabeth ii family life family tree fashion and style gemstones genetics george vi gradenigo hello! henry viii highgrove history hochberg house of windsor jewellery king juan carlos książ castle liechtenstein line of succession list of rulers medical monarchist movements monarchists mongolia mountbatten nara period plantinum jubilee politics portugal prince harry princess eugenie queen elizabeth ii queen louise queen victoria royal ancestry royalty of taiwan solomon j solomon spanish royal family thai royal family tradition unfinished portrait united states united states of america wales


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:44 PM.

Social Knowledge Networks

eXTReMe Tracker
Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2021
Jelsoft Enterprises
×