Diana's Eating Disorders and Health Issues

[Lady Nimue]

It's been a year or two now since I read several books on Diana, but my memory seems to be different. It was never a matter of drugs, but of therapy (someone to discuss things with) was my understanding. Diana kept bolting from every therapist. She herself seemed to settle on astrologers and psychics, I think. My sense is prescription drugs were not 'the thing' in the 1980's that they became in later decades. I may be wrong but that's what I am recalling.

Also, eating disorders, while perhaps not routinely mentioned in the popular press, were being dealt with in the profession as early as the 1970's. Consider that Diana's elder sister had had her own eating issues handled in therapy in the late 70's. That's in the profession. Among the general populace (and that would include members of the BRF like Charles) would not have necessarily been savvy about eating issues. In fact, it could have been seen as a 'normal' fixation at that social strata. Who was it that said one could never be 'too rich, or too thin'?

 

[Mermaid1962]

Some musings:


Valium first came out in the 60s. My American aunt, who had a son fighting in the Vietnam war, didn't take it although many of her friends who were in the same situation (having sons in Vietnam) did. They were commonly called "housewives helpers" then, and it wasn't generally known how addictive they were. The so-called first generation of antidepressants that seemed to be widely used were the tricyclic antidepressants such as Elavil (the "little blue pill") in the 70s and 80s. Later the SSRIs such as Prozac came into use; and it seemed that everyone was talking about these drugs at that time.

I have someone in my extended family who was treated for anorexia in the 70s. The disease wasn't unknown, but it wasn't talked about as openly as today. I certainly don't remember hearing about it during my school years, which ended in 1979. Karen Carpenter died in 1983 from a heart attack due to anorexia nervosa; and, to my recollection, that's when eating disorders were really talked about as serious illnesses and not just "extreme dieting."

I do remember hearing a radio interview with a reporter, perhaps James Whitaker or Nigel Dempster, in which he discussed Diana's supposed anorexia back in 1982, after she'd lost so much weight after the birth of Prince William.

There was much more shame involved with taking antidepressants back in the 70s and 80s. Depression, and the need to take medication for it, was seen much more as a personal failing and less as a brain disease.

Diana's sister Sarah went into treatment for her anorexia not long after she started spending time with Prince Charles, and she got better. Perhaps he expected the same kind of improvement when Diana started seeing her therapists, not aware that bulimia is a different kind of illness.

 

[Denville]

I think that by the time Diana started to see the therapist who helpe her to get over the bulimia, Charles had givne up hope of things improving very much.

 

[TLLK]

Diana's sister Sarah went into treatment for her anorexia not long after she started spending time with Prince Charles, and she got better. Perhaps he expected the same kind of improvement when Diana started seeing her therapists, not aware that bulimia is a different kind of illness.

I agree that Charles likely felt that Diana would have shown an improvement earlier in her treatment due to her sister's experience.

 

[Denville]

Do you think so? I would have said that at first he wasn't sure what was happening, why Di was losing weight, then realised that she was throwing up her meals. I don't tink he would have consider that the same as anorexia.. since she was eating. He got her into therapy in the frirst months, more because of her depression, and mood swings and she was put on Valium, which he didn't approve of. then when she was pregnant she had to come off it. I think that he could see there was something wrong, and that it wasn't just depression, but could probably see in the first year or 2 that whatever therapy she was having, it wasn't helping very fast.
I think he didn't understand the bulimia, and very few people including doctors would have done so. He probably got exasperated as time went on, knowing that she was either starving herself or vomiting a lot of her meals.. and that she didn't seem to be getting any better. So Id say by the time she did accept there was a problem and found therapist that helped, Charles had felt that there was nothing much could be done...

 

[Pranter]

She had PPD too as I recall...which would of just continued that emotional rollercoaster, add bullimia on top of that....it would of been very hard for everyone involved.


LaRae

 

[Mermaid1962]

By PPD, do you mean post-partum depression, Pranter? Yes, she said that she suffered from that. It would certainly help to explain that dramatic weight-loss after William was born. I wonder whether it hit her after Harry was born as well and that contributed to her feeling that her marriage was over. I'm sure that Charles going off to play polo soon after the birth didn't help, but her hormonal state might have made things seem so much worse than they might have really been at the time.

 

[Pranter]

Yes sorry...Post-Partum Depression. I really don't think it was that Charles and the family didn't care ..they really had no idea how to handle it. Charles being more sensitive was, ironically, would of be the most likely to have sympathy and understanding of her. Such a shame they couldn't have sorted things out after she was more healthy and mature/realistic.


LaRae

 

[Denville]

Diana seemed to indicate at the Bashir interview that the RF were not sympathetic to her post natal depression.

 

[O-H Anglophile]

Diana seemed to indicate at the Bashir interview that the RF were not sympathetic to her post natal depression.

I think Diana indicated a number of things during the early 90s that weren't entirely factual. She was spinning things to gain sympathy from the public.

 

[Pranter]

She may not of always been factual..however back in that time frame PPD was not widely understood/talked about. The issues of bullimia and anorexia even less so.

Some of the BRF do have the attitude of 'just get on with it'...and not known for being overly sensitive.


LaRae

 

[MARG]

I think that "just get on with it" attitude is pretty widespread. If you do not have a cast or are admitted to a hospital people can be very dismissive and treat you like it's all in your head.

I suffer from migraines and for me, the first indication is often the loss of depth perception. I bump into door frames and edges of furniture, etc. There is no way I would get behind the wheel of a car. Yet at that stage, I am not even in pain and even family have a hard time understanding what is happening.

The frustrations of invisible illnesses are incredibly difficult when they impact on friends, family or even work. If they can't see it it just isn't happening.

 

[Osipi]

We've come a long way in understanding sicknesses that baffled us not so long ago. We're not that far removed from the era where women were told to smoke a cigarette even to "relax" them and ease the pain. The Rolling Stones sang about "mother's little helpers" which also was prevalent. PMS and PPD and mental sicknesses are now being treated as one would for pneumonia.

When something isn't understood, its hard for someone to know what to do for the person or how to cope with the sufferer. Charles was between a rock and a hard place when it came to Diana. One minute she could be all smiles and then turn into sobbing mess. She was very mercurial and he didn't know what to expect.

@MARG. I also get severe migraines from time to time. A capsule of white willow bark and feverfew per day is supposed to prevent the onset and even lessen the effects of migraines.

 

[Denville]

I agree but it is true that she did as I recall say something like "I think that no one in the RF had had this depression/post natal thing before.." so that would seem oto indicate that she did not find great sympathy from them with her experience of this illness,.
It may not be true, but she did say something to that effect....

 

[Osipi]

When I think about it, even if other members of the BRF had experienced post natal depression, it would not have been something that they talk about. From what I know, and this covers the very little I know about the royal family's interpersonal, private relationships, they weren't a family that swapped personal feelings and maladies and such over dinners. Some things were just not talked about. That's why they kept diaries. One kept personal things personal.

I think a better way for Diana to have expressed that is to say that to her knowledge, no one in the royal family has going through this before. They may have but not talked about it. By all I know of Diana, (and this neither good or bad), she was a very touching/feeling emotional person that naturally needed an outlet. The royal family is the exact opposite of that from what I know of them. Another instance of oil and vinegar. They just don't mix.

 

[Denville]

I'd say it si very likely that other royal women have experienced post natal depression and I'm sure that if Diana had it, at least younger royal women would not have fainted wit horror at her experiencing it or talking about it. Not the queen, or Margaret problaby, but other younger royals.
But they woudln't have talked of it publicly and perhaps would have felt "yes it is awful Diana, but you have to get treatment and get over it".. and certainly not complain publicly.
I think she was just as she often did exaggerating how miserable she was, and how little sympathy or understand the RF showed to her in illnesses like bulimima, morning sickness, post natal depression etc.

 

[Osipi]

One thing that expresses what you wrote, Denville, is that I do think that another syndrome that Diana had was the PLOMS. The "Poor Little Ol' Me" Syndrome.

Some people have problems and rather than dwell on them, they find solutions and fix things. Some people dwell on the problems and wallow in them feeling sorry for themselves. Diana was very much in the later IMO.

It doesn't make any of the problems less devastating or real but just different ways of handling them.

 

[Denville]

It doesn't make any of the problems less devastating or real but just different ways of handling them.

Well in fairness to Diana, a lot of her problems weren't that easily fixable. She had a serious condition of bulimia which wasn't understood at the time and wasn’t easy to cure. She was in a public position so that she could not admit to the illness easily... or “take time off” for serious in depth therapy. IM sure the RF was keen to keep her illness, her depression and upset and difficult days a secret.
She had an unhappy marriage which seems to have had real problems form Day 1, including Charles’ having just come out of an affair with another woman. She had little family support and no friends who were part of the inner royal circle, who could have maybe understood her position better and given her more useful advice. I think that her friends were not all that smart in helping with the Morton book, for instance. More sensible friends would have refused to help with it and said “Don’t do it”.
I agree, she was a “Poor liltet Me-er” but I’m a bit like that myself. I do tend to weep and wail.
But think she did have a tendency to exaggerate and outright lie at times, when she was unhappy. So that it is hard to disentangle her legitimate grievances from her “fancied” ones.
I don’t think the RF were the best people at dealing with mental illnesses such as bulimia, but I don’t think that they were out there with a whip making her work if she was ill with morning sickness, or post-natal blues. So In short I think that she didn’t get NO sympanthy form them for her illnesses during pregnancy and after

 

[Osipi]

Seriously though, when anyone has a problem or a challenge to face, fixing them can seem like a mountain to move with a toy shovel. Perhaps the royal family had the stamina of "getting on with it" whereas Diana was more sensitive to her problems and fixated on them more but the fact remains that people handle things differently.

Diana, it seems, had things coming at her from all angles and from different experiences and that put her into a vicious cycle that most likely would devastate many women to the point of never coming back. Diana did eventually face a lot of her problems and even went public about them as she did with her bulimia and, to me, that showed a lot of personal growth. Other aspects of her life did consume her to the point of constantly wanting revenge and restitution by making it all public which, IMO, was not a wise thing to do.

The more we delve into the person that was Diana, the more we realize just what a complex person she really was.

Oh btw: If you ever do get into the weep and wail mode, remember you have friends here.

 

[Tsaritsa]

Queen Mary was renown for her adherence to duty. It was she who famously -apocryphally?- taught the child Elizabeth how to take control of her bladder against those times when she'd have to stand for hours. Her work paid dividends. Her Majesty has never once been derelict in her duty, her sense of which surpasses all else. However, duty -such a cold word- is something one does, but not necessarily feels, beyond the importance of doing it. In this, HM is the consummate professional................but she was born to it. I guess by now, it comes naturally. I think it would have been hard for anyone to attain those high standards after such a short time. To go from nonentity to celebrity, child minder to POW, newly wed to mother of a future king all within little more than a year -and still only just 21- be expected to carry out Royal duties without flinching would seem a huge burden for anyone, let alone a girl who was as unsure of herself and as mentally fragile as Diana. Throw PPD into the mix and one starts to wonder how she managed to do anything. She spoke often of her duty. I believe it was important for her. To understand how successful she was in this, I think one would have to ask those of us she came into contact with. Of course she didn't fulfill them in the same way as HM. Different personality. Different generation, but fragile mental health, PPD, notwithstanding, I'm willing to bet it was a magical and unforgettable experience for most of those who met her. A pretty good legacy for a girl who -unlike her daughter in law who, thankfully, was given time and every assistance- was thrown in at the deep end and left to get on with it.

 

[Mermaid1962]

Yes, I think that the way Diana went out in public and did her job in spite of how she felt and what she was dealing with was nothing less than phenomenal. She was very professional, both in terms of pleasing the public and with her paperwork. The issues in public with Prince Charles started showing in 1985 or 1986. I remember reading an article in a woman's magazine about their tour of Italy in 1985 which suggested that she was "touchy" on that trip. The reporter picked up that something wasn't quite right in the way they were acting toward each other.

 

[Lady Nimue]

Yes, I think that the way Diana went out in public and did her job in spite of how she felt and what she was dealing with was nothing less than phenomenal. She was very professional, both in terms of pleasing the public and with her paperwork. The issues in public with Prince Charles started showing in 1985 or 1986. I remember reading an article in a woman's magazine about their tour of Italy in 1985 which suggested that she was "touchy" on that trip. The reporter picked up that something wasn't quite right in the way they were acting toward each other.

Yep, she'd fallen in love with James Hewitt and was at the beginnings of the longest involvement she would have with one man. All the rest would be 'fleeting' by comparison to her Hewitt liaison. She'd 'walked away' from Charles by then.

 

[Denville]

Yes, I think that the way Diana went out in public and did her job in spite of how she felt and what she was dealing with was nothing less than phenomenal. She was very professional, both in terms of pleasing the public and with her paperwork. The issues in public with Prince Charles started showing in 1985other.

I think that's true that in spite of her health problems, and depression wit the marriage, she DID do her best and in public, until the very last years, she was doig a good job. asyou say very professional, dazzling, and charming...and I think serious about her work,
I think that it is a pity she didn't stick to "don't tell and don't explain", but she felt that she wanted out of the RF.

 

[Osipi]

Actually, I think things would have been much worse for Diana if she hadn't had her public appearances and her charitable works to balance her life out. In a world where her private life was falling apart at the seams, to be able to be out and among the people where she felt accepted, admired and loved were the bright spots in her life that she so badly needed. It was one area of her life where her innate sense of caring and compassion was reciprocated.

A happy life involves a lot of give and take and unfortunately, the place where Diana found this the most was in her public life. Without this, I think her private life would have been much worse on her mentally.

 

[Denville]

I think it was in some ways but I'm not sure I wholly agree. She certainly "got something back" from her charity work, both in terms of being admired for when she did "glamourous events" and for the kindness and support she showed to people in need.
but - still, it all involved pressure, press notice, and at times criticsm. and that must have bene more strain for her. And its also a fact that Charles DID begin to get upset for a time at least that Diana was more photographed and noticed than he was. so maybe if her amazing popularity had been less or she hadn't done so much, perhaps she would have had more time/energy to bestow on trying to work out her private life? and maybe her bulimia would also have been less severe. I dont know. I think that the marriage was so difficult that it would never have worked out too well.. perhaps the charity work did keep her busy and give her satisfaction..but she did cut it back in her last couple fo years.. so perhaps It was also a source of strain for her.

 

[Missjersey]

Truly a sad situation to watch from the outside. The adoration seemed to sustain her temporarily as the reality of her unhappiness just consumed her.

 

[Denville]

Truly a sad situation to watch from the outside. The adoration seemed to sustain her temporarily as the reality of her unhappiness just consumed her.

its hard to blame her for enjoying the affection the publc gave her, but perhaps as she got a bit older, her sons were away at school, Charles was now totally "out of her life", she began to feel that the public's love wasn't enough.. and that she needed to be free to find someone in her life to love openly...

 

[Missjersey]

its hard to blame her for enjoying the affection the publc gave her, but perhaps as she got a bit older, her sons were away at school, Charles was now totally "out of her life", she began to feel that the public's love wasn't enough.. and that she needed to be free to find someone in her life to love openly...

I agree after awhile the public’s love wasn’t enough. I’m not even sure she knew what love is. IMO she seemed to expect a man to just adore her 24hrs a day, she was needy and possessive. Unfortunately she didn’t have the length of years to find happiness within herself first to even be able to find a true love. Sad.

 

[M. Payton]

Not meaning to be OT yet I think that both William and Harry through their own experiences with in the family have come to take on the issue of mental health for they can understand how much it effected their mother. Diana was emotionally disturbed as a child I honestly believe and it was carried over unto her adult life with no one really understanding her let alone she did not understand what was going on emotionally in her mind. Being emotionally stable is one of the very crucial elements of being an mature adult and she just never made it that far in life for her life was cut way to short.

 

[Denville]

I agree after awhile the public’s love wasn’t enough. I’m not even sure she knew what love is. IMO she seemed to expect a man to just adore her 24hrs a day, she was needy and possessive. Unfortunately she didn’t have the length of years to find happiness within herself first to even be able to find a true love. Sad.

I think that's a little unfair. Love is a very strange thing and everyone's definition is different. I agree she was needy and possessive, but I think that was something that was sparked off by her marriage. She doesn't seem to have been particularly needy with her friends before her marriage, but I think that when she got married and it was very difficult, it opened up childhood wounds and she got very obsessed with Charles and whether he loved her and she did want his attention all the time.
Charles pulled away, she was bulimic and ill and depressed and while Charles tried to help, it was difficult for both of them.. and it didnt' work..
And she then did become very needy with her friends, and with future lovers....