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  #2961  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
From what I've read, Diana never seemed to be comfortable in her own skin when she was left to her own devices. Its been stated in many places that Diana always seemed to be glued to her phone or had ear buds playing music from her walkman or even went in search of staff to talk to.

There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. I do believe that Diana was searching for an all encompassing love that surrounded her and that was something that she never found. She was very much a people person more so than she was a introverted soul that preferred to be alone. Perhaps thats a reason why she never could understand Charles and his need to be alone in his own world sometimes painting or hiking or fishing and in general, seeking solitude. In that respect, Charles and Diana were two totally opposite kind of people.

When two people share a life together and have little to nothing in common, there's little they enjoy together and that, in and of itself, can create loneliness and longing for something different.
Im not so sure that Charles was a loner and diana a people person, per se. I think that he does enjoy his own compny, but he also has a close circle of friends and likes to be with htem… but there are times he likes to do hobbies alone. ANd Diana IMO was more in need of company after her marriage because she had married into a situation where she was expected to mix with the RF, and found they weren't that congenial.. so she needed to try and find some companionship that was more agreeable. and she and Charles were both IMO lonely in their marriage, because they coudlnt' connect with each other...

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Originally Posted by QueenEmpath View Post
Diana always felt lonely even before her wedding to Charles. Due to her mother's abandonment and her older sisters not being around when she was younger.
She had hr little brother and when she went to school she had a cirlcle of friends. However I agree that her mother's leaving her, left a psychological wound....
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  #2962  
Old 08-22-2018, 04:00 AM
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Originally Posted by Denville View Post
She had hr little brother and when she went to school she had a cirlcle of friends. However I agree that her mother's leaving her, left a psychological wound....
That would have been her first foray into motherhood, something she excelled at. The memory of rejection never leaves and the very tactics employed to prevent it happening again are often the cause of it happening again.
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  #2963  
Old 08-22-2018, 04:11 AM
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In fact, I think one of the major selling points for Diana with marrying the Prince of Wales was holding onto the idea that this was a marriage that could never end in divorce. That aspect of security for Diana was very appealing.

It also could have led to her downfall over time holding that belief. Divorce was unthinkable and with that option out of the picture, it gave to more leeway to act in ways that she may not have done if she knew that at any given moment, Charles could and would file for divorce and leave her on her own once again.
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  #2964  
Old 08-22-2018, 04:25 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
From what I've read, Diana never seemed to be comfortable in her own skin when she was left to her own devices. Its been stated in many places that Diana always seemed to be glued to her phone or had ear buds playing music from her walkman or even went in search of staff to talk to.

There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely. I do believe that Diana was searching for an all encompassing love that surrounded her and that was something that she never found. She was very much a people person more so than she was a introverted soul that preferred to be alone. Perhaps thats a reason why she never could understand Charles and his need to be alone in his own world sometimes painting or hiking or fishing and in general, seeking solitude. In that respect, Charles and Diana were two totally opposite kind of people.

When two people share a life together and have little to nothing in common, there's little they enjoy together and that, in and of itself, can create loneliness and longing for something different.


Put simply, Osipi, she was looking for the person who could wave a magic wand and make everything better, ie erase the pain of the past and ensure a happy ever after future, rather like we say "There, there" to a child and, despite the outer sophistication she acquired, Diana's inner child was never far from the surface, SUCH was her need to be unconditionally loved. Who better to do this than the most -in her 'child's' eyes- than the most powerful man in the country, the Prince of Wales? Trouble was, like most small children, she had no conception that he'd have needs of his own. At the time of their marriage, it's very likely Charles was her hero. Hero's don't have the same needs as lesser mortals, do they?

You're correct in that she probably wasn't comfortable with her own company. It's likely that she needed the validation and approval of another for her to be visible in her own eyes. Almost as if it needed another to ensure her she existed. This maybe why she performed her public duties so well. Her needs were being fed and she gave generously to those who fed her. Sadly, for her, the one person she'd depended on to feed her, was also hungry. It maybe that her insatiable need contributed to his looking elsewhere for his own 'food'.
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  #2965  
Old 08-22-2018, 05:44 AM
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But some of what several of you are talking about also describes the needs of an introvert versus the needs of an extrovert. Introverts like Charles need to recharge by being alone, especially after attending an event with lots of people. Extroverts like Diana get their energy from interacting with other people and are drained from being alone.
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  #2966  
Old 08-22-2018, 06:01 AM
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And right there lies the meat and the potatoes along with the gravy and hot biscuits of reasons that Diana and Charles shouldn't have gone into a marriage without really getting to know each other more intimately than they did. Its the oil and the vinegar reasons they'd never truly be compatible.

Now I'm hungry. Go figure.
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  #2967  
Old 08-22-2018, 06:13 AM
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Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
And right there lies the meat and the potatoes along with the gravy and hot biscuits of reasons that Diana and Charles shouldn't have gone into a marriage without really getting to know each other more intimately than they did. Its the oil and the vinegar reasons they'd never truly be compatible.

Now I'm hungry. Go figure.
I was watching a documentary about Diana and Sarah yesterday. Where I learnt that both Diana and Andrew had known each other since half of their childhood and teenage years, they were in the same friend circle, they were around the same age. People thought they would end up marrying each other but everyone was shocked when Diana married Charles instead. Later it was Diana who introduced Sarah and Andrew
IMO mebye she got married to the wrong person
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  #2968  
Old 08-22-2018, 06:26 AM
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Yeps. The assumption that Diana and Andrew were perhaps slated to head to the altar was how Diana got her nickname "Duchess" or "Duch" at a young age.

However, I just can't picture Diana being happy as a Navy wife with Andrew off at sea so much. It sure didn't work wonders for Andrew and Sarah's marriage.
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  #2969  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:33 PM
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Originally Posted by QueenEmpath View Post
I was watching a documentary about Diana and Sarah yesterday. Where I learnt that both Diana and Andrew had known each other since half of their childhood and teenage years, they were in the same friend circle, they were around the same age. People thought they would end up marrying each other but everyone was shocked when Diana married Charles instead. Later it was Diana who introduced Sarah and Andrew
IMO mebye she got married to the wrong person
I'd be very surprised if people really thought of them as a possible couple. THey played together as children, and she did joke about his being her friend as a kid but when she was old enough to get married at 19 or so, Andrew was still very young.. plus I think the old childhood friendship had been outgrown...and in any case Andrew and she would have been IMO even more oil and water than her and CHarles. He would have been away at his Naval posting.. He was bumptious and arrogant, and somewhat crude..
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  #2970  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:38 PM
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Andrew might of suited Diana in some ways..she was known to be slightly vulgar/crude at times as well. His kidding and joking would of suited her I think...but the separation might of been too much.


LaRae
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  #2971  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:40 PM
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Originally Posted by Denville View Post
I'd be very surprised if people really thought of them as a possible couple. THey played together as children, and she did joke about his being her friend as a kid but when she was old enough to get married at 19 or so, Andrew was still very young.. plus I think the old childhood friendship had been outgrown...and in any case Andrew and she would have been IMO even more oil and water than her and CHarles. He would have been away at his Naval posting.. He was bumptious and arrogant, and somewhat crude..
As they say, whatever happens, happen for a reason. If Charles and Diana hadn't married , there won't be William and Harry and Her unhappy marriage encouraged her for her humanitarian work. But she didn't deserve the end she got.
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  #2972  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:42 PM
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Originally Posted by QueenEmpath View Post
As they say, whatever happens, happen for a reason. If Charles and Diana hadn't married , there won't be William and Harry and Her unhappy marriage encouraged her for her humanitarian work. But she didn't deserve the end she got.
of course she didn't but I don't see that her mraraige encouraged her to do humanitarian work.. it was part of her duty as Princess.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pranter View Post
Andrew might of suited Diana in some ways..she was known to be slightly vulgar/crude at times as well. His kidding and joking would of suited her I think...but the separation might of been too much.


LaRae
I don't think so. He has no manners and Diana was well mannered, had always been brought up to be polite to people.. And she liked a bit of fun and an occasional dirty joke but I can't see her enjoying Andy's much cruder sense of humour.. plus she might have found his preferring to stay home and watch golf videos irritating just as Sarah did..
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  #2973  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:51 PM
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Moving on from sad things, one thing How come, Diana, got the title of a Princess after marriage when her sisters-in-law were/are Dutchess and Countess. Even her daughter- in- laws are Duchesses. As I know the title of Princess is only for the daughters of the royal family eg Princess Anne, Beatrice, Eugenie and Charlotte. In Louise' case, she didn't get the title since her father refused. So, how Diana get the title of Princess when she was the bride of the family?
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  #2974  
Old 08-22-2018, 01:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QueenEmpath View Post
Moving on from sad things, one thing How come, Diana, got the title of a Princess after marriage when her sisters-in-law were/are Dutchess and Countess. Even her daughter- in- laws are Duchesses. As I know the title of Princess is only for the daughters of the royal family eg Princess Anne, Beatrice, Eugenie and Charlotte. In Louise' case, she didn't get the title since her father refused. So, how Diana get the title of Princess when she was the bride of the family?
Her dauaghters in law are princesses too, and royal duchesses. Diana was a Princess by virtue of sharing her husbands title...
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  #2975  
Old 08-22-2018, 02:00 PM
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Truth be known, Diana could have been known as the Duchess of Cornwall if she had preferred to use that styling. She legally could take the feminine version of any title that Charles holds. As the Prince of Wales is the most esteemed title Charles has, Diana took the feminine version of the Princess of Wales. In Scotland, Diana was known as the Duchess of Rothesay.

Camilla chose to use the styling of the Duchess of Cornwall which is actually the oldest title that Charles holds. She legally though *is* the Princess of Wales should she have preferred to be known as such.

You might find the thread Questions about British Titles and Styles of interest. Loads of information there.
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  #2976  
Old 08-22-2018, 04:17 PM
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Originally Posted by QueenEmpath View Post
Moving on from sad things, one thing How come, Diana, got the title of a Princess after marriage when her sisters-in-law were/are Dutchess and Countess. Even her daughter- in- laws are Duchesses. As I know the title of Princess is only for the daughters of the royal family eg Princess Anne, Beatrice, Eugenie and Charlotte. In Louise' case, she didn't get the title since her father refused. So, how Diana get the title of Princess when she was the bride of the family?
Diana took on the highest title of her husband which was Prince of Wales. Prince of Wales superseded all of Charles' other titles including his ducal ones. Note, she was not Princess Diana, but The Princess of Wales during her marriage, and Diana, Princess of Wales after her divorce.

For Andrew, William and Harry, et. al., their ducal titles are their highest title which is why their wives are / were Duchess of X.

When Charles is King he will presumably create William the Prince of Wales and when that happens, his wife will become the Princess of Wales.
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  #2977  
Old 08-22-2018, 07:35 PM
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Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
And right there lies the meat and the potatoes along with the gravy and hot biscuits of reasons that Diana and Charles shouldn't have gone into a marriage without really getting to know each other more intimately than they did. Its the oil and the vinegar reasons they'd never truly be compatible.

Now I'm hungry. Go figure.
It wasn't that Charles was that much of an introvert more that he had a reserved nature. Diana didn't understand that in Charles world he got up and "went to work" every day. Diana had never really thought about the royal lifestyle per se. It's really the requirements and obligations of Charles and her positions as Prince and Princess of Wales.

Diana resented that obligations outweighed whether or not she felt like doing an engagement or Charles spending all his time with her. I think growing up in an Aristocratic House her perception was that both her mother and father had the odd engagement but mostly her father ran the estate and her mother would have engaged in the local WI as patron perhaps, but mostly it was shopping, lunching with friends and black tie dinners. The married version of the single Sloan Rangers.

Finding that the BRF was the living embodiment of Queen Mary of Teck's oft-mentioned quote: "You are a member of the British royal family. We are never tired, and we all love hospitals." Not a whole lot of fun and romance there except when they attended polo games. I just watched a "romantic clips" of the BRF and was surprised at the sheer number of photos of Diana presenting Charles with a prize along with very romantic kisses.

Basically, it wasn't all bad.
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  #2978  
Old 08-22-2018, 07:57 PM
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Originally Posted by MARG View Post
It wasn't that Charles was that much of an introvert more that he had a reserved nature. Diana didn't understand that in Charles world he got up and "went to work" every day. Diana had never really thought about the royal lifestyle per se. It's really the requirements and obligations of Charles and her positions as Prince and Princess of Wales.

Diana resented that obligations outweighed whether or not she felt like doing an engagement or Charles spending all his time with her. I think growing up in an Aristocratic House her perception was that both her mother and father had the odd engagement but mostly her father ran the estate and her mother would have engaged in the local WI as patron perhaps, but mostly it was shopping, lunching with friends and black tie dinners. The married version of the single Sloan Rangers.

Finding that the BRF was the living embodiment of Queen Mary of Teck's oft-mentioned quote: "You are a member of the British royal family. We are never tired, and we all love hospitals." Not a whole lot of fun and romance there except when they attended polo games. I just watch a "romantic clips" of the BRF and was surprised at the sheer number of photos of Diana presenting Charles with a prize along with very romantic kisses.

Basically, it wasn't all bad.
I think that it was that he loved another woman. Still does. That is a hard pill to swallow. The work didn't bother her, and she loved the lime light. And to his distress he was a second banana. It was not a good match.
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  #2979  
Old 08-22-2018, 08:09 PM
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I was watching a documentary about Diana and Sarah yesterday. Where I learnt that both Diana and Andrew had known each other since half of their childhood and teenage years, they were in the same friend circle, they were around the same age. People thought they would end up marrying each other but everyone was shocked when Diana married Charles instead. Later it was Diana who introduced Sarah and Andrew
IMO mebye she got married to the wrong person
Sarah and Andrew knew each other as children as well and there is photographic evidence of the together aged about 10 - 12.

Diana didn't introduce them - as she claimed later on - but rather believed they would be suited together and so sat them together at a lunch.

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Moving on from sad things, one thing How come, Diana, got the title of a Princess after marriage when her sisters-in-law were/are Dutchess and Countess. Even her daughter- in- laws are Duchesses. As I know the title of Princess is only for the daughters of the royal family eg Princess Anne, Beatrice, Eugenie and Charlotte. In Louise' case, she didn't get the title since her father refused. So, how Diana get the title of Princess when she was the bride of the family?
ALL of the wives of the British Princes became Princesses on their marriages as the wives of Princes but in the UK the title of Prince isn't a title for a Peer of the Realm (or someone who would have had a seat in the pre-1999 House of Lords). They are thus commoners and eligible to stand for election to the House of Commons.

What the Queen has done on their wedding days is promote her sons and grandsons from commoner status to that of peer of the realm and so they went from mere princes to Dukes and Earls.

Charles was a peer of the realm from the moment his mother ascended the throne when he became Duke of Cornwall (and Duke of Rothesay etc in Scotland).

The only wife of a British prince who uses the style of princess is Princess Michael of Kent because her husband has no peerage title for her to use.

In the UK the wives don't become Princess with their own name on marriage so it was never Princess Diana, or Princesses Camilla, Catherine, Meghan, Sarah, Sophie, Birgitte, Katherine or Marie-Christine. The public and media constantly referred to Diana as Princess Diana but that was incorrect - she was HRH The Princess of Wales. Only a princess born as a princess in the UK can use Princess own name - Charlotte, Beatrice, Eugenie, Anne and Alexandra.

Wives are Princess Husband's name - so Princesses Charles, William, Harry, Andrew, Edward, Richard, Edward and Michael. Had the Queen not promoted William, Harry, Andrew anad Edward on their wedding days that would have been their wives styles as it was for Princess Richard of Gloucester and still is for Princess Michael of Kent (Princess Richard is now HRH The Duchess of Gloucester - so she stopped using Princess as a style when her husband inherited his father's dukedom. He went from HRH Prince Richard of Gloucester to HRH The Duke of Gloucester and took his wife with him).
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  #2980  
Old 08-22-2018, 08:51 PM
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I think that Diana being matched up with Andrew was due to them being similar ages and neighbors but I think that it was more childhood musings. I don't think that Andrew was deemed unsuitable or incompatible so much as Charles was considered "the big fish." I think that Diana's father and maternal grandmother aspired for there to be a Spencer-BRF union, specifically they wanted eldest Spencer daughter Sarah to marry Charles. I think that at some point Diana set her cap for "the big fish" and when things did not pan out between Sarah and Charles and Charles took an interest in Diana, which Diana gladly reciprocated, then everyone shifted their aspirations to the Spencer-BRF union being between Charles and Diana.
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