The Duke and Duchess of Sussex and Family, News and Events 6: Aug. 2021- Oct. 2022

[Anna1519]

Originally Posted by Osipi

This is perhaps the most well thought out post any of us have made on this subject that I've read. Even my own.

Welcome to TRF, Anna, good to see you here and posting.

Thanks so much, Osipi - that is very kind of you. As a long-time lurker who has appreciated your balanced posts, that is a big compliment.

I think your point about Harry hopefully realizing that his presence wasn't the focus/didn't matter is well taken. His team really didn't comment - officially or unofficially through leaks - about the event beyond confirming that he wouldn't be there so I think that does suggest some self-awareness on his part (the security debate is another matter but I don't want to get off-topic).

[HenRach Dominion]

I actually don't think that HRH The Duke of Sussex regrets his decision that much. He's already said goodbye to his grandfather. He ushered in his casket and saw it lowered into the ground. Sure, this particular service was mainly a celebration of HRH The Duke of Edinburgh's life and works, but he has a lasting legacy that will stand for longer than his nearly 100 years, which is a celebration in of itself.

Luckily, like the funeral, the sole focus was on HRH The Duke of Edinburgh, as it should be.

[Hallo girl]

There are times in life when you only have one opportunity to do something there is no replay.
Whatever his reason I hope Harry thought it through and came to the decision that he was comfortable with.

[Osipi]

Originally Posted by Anna1519

Thanks so much, Osipi - that is very kind of you. As a long-time lurker who has appreciated your balanced posts, that is a big compliment.

I think your point about Harry hopefully realizing that his presence wasn't the focus/didn't matter is well taken. His team really didn't comment - officially or unofficially through leaks - about the event beyond confirming that he wouldn't be there so I think that does suggest some self-awareness on his part (the security debate is another matter but I don't want to get off-topic).

I haven't sat down and watched the service in its entirety yet but I've learned that in the replay on the BBC, they've included tributes to the DoE by various members of the Duke's family and a clip was included from a documentary from back in 2021 that aired about the Duke's lifetime where Harry presents a nice tribute to his grandfather.

I thought that was a decent thing to do and look forward to seeing it as I sit and watch the entire service from beginning to end later tonight with tea and snacks.

[Roderick]

For goodness sake, it's very obvious surely by now that Harry is not the sort of person to sit and mull over things to make a balanced decision. His focus is himself, his wife and children. The idea that he was tossing and turning whether to come to his grandfather's memorial service or not is in my opinion ludicrous. He doesn't work like that!

[Erin9]

Originally Posted by Iluvbertie

The security excuse is pathetic given how many HEADS of STATE were in attendance security around this event would have been the tightest anywhere in the world. It was just an excuse to avoid his family.

Yes. It was an absurd excuse as to why he couldn’t attend.

[CrownPrincessJava]

Had QEII requested his attendance, i.e. badly wanted him there, I believe Prince Harry would have attended.

I truly believe Prince Harry hates being in the UK because of the memories/feelings it holds - and will only return when absolutely necessary. My own father refused to travel back to Italy after he emigrated to Australia, which was 55 years ago. For him, returning would bring back the memories of a hard childhood in post-WWII Calabria.

[Vicky7]

Originally Posted by CrownPrincessJava

Had QEII requested his attendance, i.e. badly wanted him there, I believe Prince Harry would have attended.

I truly believe Prince Harry hates being in the UK because of the memories/feelings it holds - and will only return when absolutely necessary. My own father refused to travel back to Italy after he emigrated to Australia, which was 55 years ago. For him, returning would bring back the memories of a hard childhood in post-WWII Calabria.

He doesnt hate that UK title tho or wasting british tax money on frivulous lawsuits.

[Vicky7]

Originally Posted by Princejohnny25

Honestly, not seeing Harry there today made me incredibly sad. I genuinely miss him being an active and public member of the RF. I only hope his journey brings him to a place of love and peace.

Its the opposite for me. Its refreshing not to see him there. Hope he stays away for the jubilee and any other royal event that isn't a funeral!

[yukari]

Originally Posted by Iluvbertie

The security excuse is pathetic given how many HEADS of STATE were in attendance security around this event would have been the tightest anywhere in the world. It was just an excuse to avoid his family.

I think it's related to his security case though.

If he attended the service and nothing happened while he is in England without RPOs, it will undermine his current security case with the Home Office, his argument about his (and his family's) safety wouldn't stand. It's been reported few weeks back that the judge wasn't really happy with his lawyer anyway for breaking the embargo (which he himself requested to keep some private), so maybe he was advised not to add other reason to weaken his case, hence his nonattendance.

Originally Posted by Roderick

For goodness sake, it's very obvious surely by now that Harry is not the sort of person to sit and mull over things to make a balanced decision. His focus is himself, his wife and children. The idea that he was tossing and turning whether to come to his grandfather's memorial service or not is in my opinion ludicrous. He doesn't work like that!

Well, this is the man who's suing a newspaper because it's online readers' comment section has "hurt his feeling" ...

[Claire]

Personally I feel that Harry is stuck against a boulder and a wall now. He cannot make any decision without it looking like he is stepping down from a previous position or confirming a lie or mistruth. And he is having a terrible time acknowledging that he has made a mistake to himself, so he will not make a move.
I have been told that he feels the violated by the press and public and that he believes the book will restore his power. And yes - when I was told that - I had to push my feet into the ground to resist the urge to disagree.
I have been told that several royals phoned him in attempts to get him to come over.
This is not a argument between Harry and the RF. Personally I am wondering if it ever was. This all Harry.

[Stefan]

Originally Posted by Fem

TBH my heart broke a little today. I can't imagine a world where Harry circa 2015 and earlier would miss his beloved grandfather's service of thanksgiving. The man who protected him in Balmoral when Princess Diana died, who walked behind his mother's coffin with him... Who, from the accounts of all his grandchildren, was an amazing, loving grandfather with a wicked sense of humor.

Harry should've been there. Meghan should've been there too, but I don't think we'll see her in the UK ever again, she already said her goodbyes. But I think with time, Harry will realize what he did, and it will be one of the most painful memories of his life - though it will be too late at that point to fix his mistake. And if he doesn't, well, then I'll think he's truly too far gone for his relationship with his family recover in the future.

One could have said it not better. And one can also see here how he has changed since he is together with Meghan. Unfortunately not for the better.

[Osipi]

Originally Posted by Claire

Personally I feel that Harry is stuck against a boulder and a wall now. He cannot make any decision without it looking like he is stepping down from a previous position or confirming a lie or mistruth. And he is having a terrible time acknowledging that he has made a mistake to himself, so he will not make a move.
I have been told that he feels the violated by the press and public and that he believes the book will restore his power. And yes - when I was told that - I had to push my feet into the ground to resist the urge to disagree.
I have been told that several royals phoned him in attempts to get him to come over.
This is not a argument between Harry and the RF. Personally I am wondering if it ever was. This all Harry.

What power? Any status or chutzpah or influence or perks he ever really had was not taken away from him by anybody at all. He willingly decided to give it all up when he made the decision to leave. There is absolutely *nothing* to actually be *restored* at all. He, himself, sunk his reputation down in the dumps by his own actions and words.

Truth be told, things didn't go in any way, shape or form the way that Harry perceived they would go and it's been a rude awakening for him.

[yukari]

Originally Posted by Osipi

What power? Any status or chutzpah or influence or perks he ever really had was not taken away from him by anybody at all. He willingly decided to give it all up when he made the decision to leave. There is absolutely *nothing* to actually be *restored* at all. He, himself, sunk his reputation down in the dumps by his own actions and words.

Truth be told, things didn't go in any way, shape or form the way that Harry perceived they would go and it's been a rude awakening for him.

This make me think of the 5 stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Seems like he's still between the "anger" and "bargaining" stage now. With the "denial" was when he's acting as psedo-royal (wreath in graveyard, psedo-tour).

[Claire]

Originally Posted by Osipi

What power? Any status or chutzpah or influence or perks he ever really had was not taken away from him by anybody at all. He willingly decided to give it all up when he made the decision to leave. There is absolutely *nothing* to actually be *restored* at all. He, himself, sunk his reputation down in the dumps by his own actions and words.

Truth be told, things didn't go in any way, shape or form the way that Harry perceived they would go and it's been a rude awakening for him.

Yes - and he knows this now and cannot bear to go in front of the world and admit it in any form. He is too hardheaded to admit he was wrong. He cannot have the press or anyone - criticizing or ridiculing him in any form, so he will continue digging a hole.

[Kataryn]

IMHO Harry has realised that he will have to deal with King Charles in the future and that it makes no sense to try to get the queen now to interfere for him against Charles wishes. The queen will do for Andrew now what she can and as long as she can, but Harry is Charles' son and they will have to find a compromise once Charles is king. As others have said, the security aspect seems just pushed up as Harry is a soldier himself, so could protect himself or bring his own security to the Uk while his overall protection from plans of terrorist groups in the Uk surely is guaranteed by the secret services of the UK as part of a general Royal protection programme.

[Alisa]

I personally did not miss him or felt that his presence was really warranted.
The important thing was that he came back for the funeral and was able to pay his respects to his grandfather when he did.

What does sadden me though is the lack of time his family gets to see the Queen. Every time we see the Queen I am fully cognizant that it may be the last.

They have alluded to Zoom visits but it is not the same as an in person visit.
I would just love to see senior Lilibet holding Lilibet junior!

[Granada]

As I watched the lovely and poignant Memorial Service for the wonderful Duke of Edinburgh, Harry's absence fleetingly did cross my mind.
Not in regards to The Queen, Charles or William either. I honestly don't think there is much 'remorse' there, by Harry. His perceived grievances are deep. He, after all wrote a tell all book that is coming out in a few months. His advance on it is *supposedly* around 20 million.

What did strike me as I watched, was wondering if he had a twinge of sadness as he saw the younger generation there ? The young children. Especially George and Charlotte.
Harry was a once adored and involved Uncle. His own two children will not know their Cambridge cousins, it seems in any meaningful way. Which brings me to someone else, Zara Tindall. I thought Zara, Mike and little Mia looked adorable. Harry was the one who introduced Zara and Mike, no less. Peter Phillips was there with his lovely girls too.
Growing up I thought Harry was close to Peter and Zara, as well as Beatrice and Eugenie. Healthy and fun relationships from toddler years onward. With William front and center too.
Yet his children will have zero cousins from his Megan's side and even taking into consideration distances involved, no 'get togethers' by this NEXT generation children to make memories from, with the Sussex Children. Megan might have grown up that way. But Harry did not.
It seems that The Cambridge, Tindall and Phillips Children are very familiar and close with each other.
I wonder if a spark of sadness crossed his mind he saw the younger ones there ? Bringing up memories of hijinks and horse play at Balmoral in Summer or Sandringham at Christmas.

[rominet09]

I really don't think Harry watched the program.

[Granada]

rominet09
You don't think Harry watched his Grandfather's Thanksgiving Service?
Well I doubt he got up at 3 am California time to watch it live, but I would bet anything that he watched at least part, if not most of it.