The Duchess of Sussex: Family and Background

[Purrs]

Your summary all the more points to something odd about his behavior. Excuse is not the word, rather explain, and the explanation requires compassion. JMO.
.

We all have different experiences that effect how we view this situation.

In my case, although I've got wonderful parents (in their 90s now), I have a childhood friend who's been dealing with toxic parents all her life. As a result, I'm less inclined to be compassionate or tolerant of people who knowingly hurt their family members because I've seen firsthand the damage they do.

Yes I believe Samantha is worse than Tom but Tom has continued to hurt her and doesn't care enough to stop. I prefer to reserve my compassion for the people like Meghan who are on the receiving end of this toxicity.

 

[Missy-]

He's not a scammer, he's a guy who had a quiet life set up just the way he wanted it. His kids were on their own, he never saw them and that was fine with all concerned. Now suddenly, because his daughter has a relationship with a prince, he's dragged into the limelight, one that his daughter has courted all her adult life but he never wanted.

He didn't sign up for this, Meghan did. Because of her he has had his privacy invaded and his world turned upside down. He supported her and was a good father by Meghan's own accounts. I feel sorry for him, and I think his daughter has failed him miserably. She's the selfish one, her father is a victim of her actions.

 

[ACO]

Thomas Markle is no victim and he proves it nonstop these days. His daughter not talking to him is his own fault and serves him right. Meghan needs to protect herself. Her father is not worth the stress.

 

[Osipi]

Meghan has two parents. Each one of them handled the limelight and public curiosity in their own ways. One chose to remain quiet and supportive of her daughter's privacy while the other, of his own free will, acted otherwise.

This is not something one can pin on Meghan, Harry, The Queen, Kensington Palace or anyone else. None of the players in these scenarios are puppets on a string or robots programmed to "fall in line". Mr. Markle is responsible for his own actions. No one else. We'll probably never know his true motives or his true intentions but only have his actions to go by.

For all we know, Tom Sr. is talking to his daughter every day on the phone and they're working things out. We only know what is in the media and with as a close watch we've had on Harry and Meghan, we *know* they're good at keeping things private. Its even possible that Tom Sr. is on a plane right now to London and a week's visit to Harry and Meghan under the radar. Or not.

I'm just going to sit back and see what happens next. I may have a really long wait too. Life goes on.

 

[Denville]

He's not a scammer, he's a guy who had a quiet life set up just the way he wanted it. His kids were on their own, he never saw them and that was fine with all concerned. Now suddenly, because his daughter has a relationship with a prince, he's dragged into the limelight, one that his daughter has courted all her adult life but he never wanted.

He didn't sign up for this, Meghan did. Because of her he has had his privacy invaded and his world turned upside down. He supported her and was a good father by Meghan's own accounts. I feel sorry for him, and I think his daughter has failed him miserably. She's the selfish one, her father is a victim of her actions.

I don't quite see how it is selfish for Meghan to have married Harry, which naturally brought he and her family into the public eye. Her acting career wasn't ever big enough to draw people to check out her parents and family but of course marryng a British royal is going to do so. however, I think that tehre is some truth in the fact that TOm M seems to have been something of a recluse, wasn't close to Meghan, and preferred a quiet life.. and now, he has been chased by the Press and Meg herself does not seem to have paid him a courtesy visit when she got engaged... so he may be trying to get a bit of attention and money out of this situation that he didn't really want...

 

[XeniaCasaraghi]

Its unfortunate because lately I see Harry and Meghan acting differently lately, and I think its due to this. I hope I'm just reading things wrong. Either way, if I was Meghan I would never talk to Tom again.

Sent from my XT1635-01 using The Royals Community mobile app

 

[M. Payton]

We all have different experiences that effect how we view this situation.

In my case, although I've got wonderful parents (in their 90s now), I have a childhood friend who's been dealing with toxic parents all her life. As a result, I'm less inclined to be compassionate or tolerant of people who knowingly hurt their family members because I've seen firsthand the damage they do.

Yes I believe Samantha is worse than Tom but Tom has continued to hurt her and doesn't care enough to stop. I prefer to reserve my compassion for the people like Meghan who are on the receiving end of this toxicity.

Even though some do not have wonderful parents they like me have become also less inclined to be compassionate or tolerate of people all because how they personally have been treated in life by others who are family members. I also reserve all my compassion for animals and children on this earth for they need that compassion and care and as adults, well they can take care of themselves just fine as Mr. Sr Markle seems to care only for one person on this earth, himself and what he can get out of it period.

No we are what is called the Renaissance Generation who have lived long lives and seen and done things that the younger generation as yet to learn....maybe ....hopefully....Thank you very much!

 

[Osipi]

I guess its true what my mother taught me a long time ago. If you see an older person with gray hairs, they've earned each and every one of them. The older we get, the more mistakes we have made, the more life's lessons have been thrown at us and we're all the better and wiser for facing the challenges. Being older does not exempt us from making mistakes.

I do tend to believe that Meghan holds what is called unconditional love for her father still. She may not approve or condone the mistakes her parent has made but along with Tom Sr. getting a few more gray hairs, his daughter will still love him. Regardless of anything that has happened. Meghan may have to treat him a bit differently and with kid gloves from here on out but that love will still be there.

 

[Cocoasneeze]

Well Mr Markle certainly is seeking the lime light now regardless of how much or little he wanted it before. He's seeking it out, now, he's contacting Piers Morgan and TMZ. And he's not speaking of things he has the right to speak about, he's talking about Meghan and her want to have children, their private conversations. Clearly Meghan and her father were close enough for her to have talked about all this with him. And for him to use her to score a good image with the public makes him extremely selfish.

 

[Lady Reem]

Even though some do not have wonderful parents they like me have become also less inclined to be compassionate or tolerate of people all because how they personally have been treated in life by others who are family members. I also reserve all my compassion for animals and children on this earth for they need that compassion and care and as adults, well they can take care of themselves just fine as Mr. Sr Markle seems to care only for one person on this earth, himself and what he can get out of it period.

No we are what is called the Renaissance Generation who have lived long lives and seen and done things that the younger generation as yet to learn....maybe ....hopefully....Thank you very much!

I completely agree.

It is rather a shame for Meghan really and she must feel so let down and betrayed that Thomas Markle Sr. scammed with the paparazzi (in collusion with his eldest daughter according to Yvonne/Samantha herself) ..got caught out (thankfully) ..but humiliated her and Harry in the process. TMZ aside... He then went onto spew her husbands private conversations on national tv show here in the UK...and again, received payment for it. Yet not once did this .. “loving father”.. see fit to defend her against the relentless atrocious stuff his much older children from a different marriage had been saying about her - IN HIS NAME.

H&M had offered Thomas Sr. help & support but clearly he had his own agenda going. Will Meghan/Harry allow this man more access into their lives to cause even more damage and humiliation given his modus operandi? Time will tell... Oh well I’m sure in all this Meghan’s deeply grateful she at least has one parent she can trust. Her mum who has been a model of decorum & dignity.

 

[wyevale]

She's the selfish one, her father is a victim of her actions.

Because she had the sheer temerity to [as ALL people have a RIGHT to], pursue her own aims, to fall in love and marry whomsoever THEY choose , and to live HER life?
Having Children does not bestow ownership over them.. they have absolute rights on what choose to do [as Adults].
It is over possessive Parents, [like Markle Sr] who are selfish...

 

[royal rob]

Its unfortunate because lately I see Harry and Meghan acting differently lately, and I think its due to this. I hope I'm just reading things wrong. Either way, if I was Meghan I would never talk to Tom again.

Sent from my XT1635-01 using The Royals Community mobile app

I can’t see how anyone could see Harry and Meghan acting differently. She has just joined the family we don’t know what her normal is yet

 

[Purrs]

Because she had the sheer temerity to do [as ALL Children have a RIGHT to do], to pursue her own aims, to fall in love and marry whomsoever THEY choose , and to live HER life?
Having Children does not bestow ownership upon them.. they have absolute rights on what they do [as Adults].
It is over possessive Parents, [like Markle Sr] who are selfish...

Exactly, adult children are NOT beholden to their parents and should be able to make their own choices and live their own lives.

 

[Madame Verseau]

Tom Sr is not entitled to the following: RPOS, a mansion with servants, his living and medical expenses, a more affluent lifestyle paid for by Meghan because he paid for her education and she's royal. He's able to afford the finer things and pay his bills thanks to his backhanded deals. Nothing from him now because he realizes the majority of the public and press have turned on him.

 

[jacqui24]

can we please acknowledge that this is not a typical situation and people do act differently in situations that they just aren't ready to handle, and doesn't indicate how their entire relationship has been? Or how about we can say an adult is responsible for his own action without saying others are at fault because they didn't support him enough? I think as adults, we all know support from loved ones just aren't enough to prevent someone from making bad decisions. It's one thing to say what he did was wrong, but this has just gone too far too many times.

He's not a scammer, he's a guy who had a quiet life set up just the way he wanted it. His kids were on their own, he never saw them and that was fine with all concerned. Now suddenly, because his daughter has a relationship with a prince, he's dragged into the limelight, one that his daughter has courted all her adult life but he never wanted.

He didn't sign up for this, Meghan did. Because of her he has had his privacy invaded and his world turned upside down. He supported her and was a good father by Meghan's own accounts. I feel sorry for him, and I think his daughter has failed him miserably. She's the selfish one, her father is a victim of her actions.

If you think it's unfair that he became a target for the media outside of his own control, how about you fault the media rather than his daughter? And no, she hasn't courted attention. In fact, she has ALWAYS been very discreet about her personal life. She did her job as an actress and promoted certain things when necessary, but her personal life was always off limits. That is the one negative aspect of getting involved with someone like Harry. But she fell in love with him, and obviously tried to make the best of the situation. She didn't send the media to her father. In fact, she's been telling them to back off while he decided he knew better than her and made a colossal mess of things.

 

[ACO]

This thread just keeps going off the rails. As soon as someone presents a logical theory, others have to take it to the extreme. And can we please acknowledge that this is not a typical situation and people do act differently in situations that they just aren't ready to handle, and doesn't indicate how their entire relationship has been? Or how about we can say an adult is responsible for his own action without saying others are at fault because they didn't support him enough? I think as adults, we all know support from loved ones just aren't enough to prevent someone from making bad decisions. It's one thing to say what he did was wrong, but this has just gone too far too many times.

I gave him the benefit of the doubt but his stunts with TMZ and GMB prove that was pointless. He really is no better than his other kids in my eyes. The staged pictures we just the beginning though felt bad for the man and made excuses. Then he kept going. What is next? If people think he is a crappy father it is a well earned titled he has bestowed onto himself. That doesn't change the past actions but the past is the past and we are talking the present.

 

[jacqui24]

I gave him the benefit of the doubt but his stunts with TMZ and GMB prove that was pointless. He really is no better than his other kids in my eyes. The staged pictures we just the beginning though felt bad for the man and made excuses. Then he kept going. What is next? If people think he is a crappy father it is a well earned titled he has bestowed onto himself. That doesn't change the past actions but the past is the past and we are talking the present.

I'm not one to make excuse for his behavior. I didn't even feel bad for him when the whole thing went down before the wedding. It was the wrong thing to do. However, when people starts going off on his entire relationship with his daughter, that's simply unfounded and not true based on what Meghan herself and those that have been around them (I'm not talking about her half-siblings) have witnessed. Relationships are never just now, but over time. Everyone makes bad decisions. Parents make shitty decisions. I have no problem with people talking about each incident, but to be completely dismissive of their entire relationship is going quite far.

 

[AlowVera]

Currently his behavior is unbecoming and untrustworthy and also creates a toxic environment. Removing yourself from a toxic person or environment does not make her a bad daughter. Not allowing others to manipulate you does not make you selfish.

 

[M. Payton]

Your comment brought to mind a book I read many decades ago and still to this day have it by my bedside table, it is worn and underlined and well used and I have recommended it to many others, it is called *Learning to Love Yourself* all about toxin relationship and walking away from those that have hurt and betrayed a loved one what was family. Took a while to sink it, yet it did, best advice to Meghan or anyone who has repeatedly betrayed her trust and honor is to close that door and keep it shut tight.....it is your life now, not theirs and you owe nobody your life period.

 

[XeniaCasaraghi]

So apparently Meghan's dad is wanting some attention again.

 

[Dman]

So apparently Meghan's dad is wanting some attention again.

Yeah, I hate the fact the the Markles went to the media with their personal family matters in the first place. It’s not the place to conduct the issues. Leave it to phone calls, texts and family meetings.

 

[Osipi]

To be honest, their time in the limelight is dying out and purely nonsense and not worth paying attention to at all. Not worth giving them the time of day in my book. Totally irrelevant to the life and times of The Duchess of Sussex.

I did check out what you were alluding to, XeniaCasaraghi, and methinks the man needs a little bit of cheese to go with his whine and perhaps a rubber mallet to drum into him that one does *not* talk to the press. Thats where his problems lie.

 

[JuliannaVictoria]

Every time an article pops up about them, I roll my eyes. So over them and their nonsense. I don't even read those. If her father wanted in, he should have curbed his desire to completely embarrass her in public.

 

[HereditaryPrincess]

Every time an article pops up about them, I roll my eyes. So over them and their nonsense. I don't even read those. If her father wanted in, he should have curbed his desire to completely embarrass her in public.

You voiced how I feel about this issue better than I could've. These articles aren't worth wasting time over (I see the titles, yawn and then move on!).

 

[Curryong]

I don't like the Markles as most of you know, and I certainly believe that Tom should just shut up.

However, his remark about Meghan's smile looking pained on some public engagements resonated with me. I've followed her since October 2016 and it does seem to me that at times the spark that she used to have seems to have dimmed somewhat.

It has nothing whatever to do with what Tom went on to rant about, the attitudes and customs of the BRF, which he doesn't understand. I believe that the Royal family have been warm and welcoming to Meghan. However, I also believe that the British media, including the tabloids, have been in attack mode since last November.

the British tabloids have attacked her on protocol but it hasn't stopped there. There have been critiques on her feminist credentials, her hugging people (in Scotland,) dress sense, bringing the monarchy into disrepute/trying to 'bring down an age old institution' by her demeanour and so-called attitudes, and on and on in the same mode.

It's easy to dismiss these tabloids, especially the Fail, but the fact is they are read by millions and can form opinion in Britain. This is a very new member of the Royal family who is trying very hard to fit in. Frankly, I have seen Meghan looking subdued and a little bit confused at times on more formal occasions, and I know it must be so very difficult for her, and how painful the continuing negativity of the Press in her husband's country must be.

I'm no advocate for Tom Markle but he knows his daughter, and if he says she looks pained at times I believe him, unfortunately.

 

[AlowVera]

That man does not blame the media with whom he is in cahoots with, he blames Meghan's new family. His remarks are self serving and manipulative. If she is not smiling as she used to perhaps its because her so called Dad continues to sell her out, continues to harm her husband and continues to behave in an unbecoming manner.


I'm not going to soften that man's actions because he is the cause of her pain.

 

[Osipi]

No matter what, its only been since November that Meghan has been thrust front and center into a very glaring and brightly lit center spot on the world stage and, unfortunately, a lot of results from that limelight has been the cackles and the glee of those that make it their job to put Meghan "in her place" or find anything and everything to fill up the column spaces to attract the clicks and the readerships.

If I had to describe what Meghan may possibly be going through at this time, it would most likely be akin to having "combat fatigue". Combat fatigue is defined as "psychological disturbance caused by prolonged exposure to active warfare, especially being under bombardment". This most certainly is what Meghan has been experiencing now for quite a while. Even if she's adept at tuning out the "noise", she doesn't live under a rock.

Mr. Markle's whines are just adding to this problem. He's best off ignored.

 

[AlowVera]

No matter what, its only been since November that Meghan has been thrust front and center into a very glaring and brightly lit center spot on the world stage and, unfortunately, a lot of results from that limelight has been the cackles and the glee of those that make it their job to put Meghan "in her place" or find anything and everything to fill up the column spaces to attract the clicks and the readerships.

If I had to describe what Meghan may possibly be going through at this time, it would most likely be akin to having "combat fatigue". Combat fatigue is defined as "psychological disturbance caused by prolonged exposure to active warfare, especially being under bombardment". This most certainly is what Meghan has been experiencing now for quite a while. Even if she's adept at tuning out the "noise", she doesn't live under a rock.

Mr. Markle's whines are just adding to this problem. He's best off ignored.

Combat fatigue aptly describes how it seems the public is now reacting to yet another exclusive interview by That man. With every interview the smaller the outrage cycle and the more he seems like an annoying gnat that will not go away.



What I find interesting is given all the inconsistencies, why does the media take his word at face value.


He has admitted time and time again that Harry and Meghan told him to just get on the plane and everything would be waiting for him. He told Harry and Meghan NOT to visit. And yet here he is whining about not getting an audience with The Queen, etc etc.


The press allows this because Markle has the privilege of getting the benefit of the doubt while Meghan has to PROVE she is worthy.

 

[Osipi]

When it comes to the media, the first, primary and utmost concern they have is the green dollars that their articles will put into their pockets. That's it in a nutshell. Integrity is not a word these people understand.

Talking to the media by *anybody* that is close to Meghan, Harry or any of the royal family is playing right into these greedy mitts and opens the door to continued heckling and poking and prodding for more "information" and causes said person to be totally excluded from the "circle of trust" that royals depend on.

Having a phone number that no longer reaches Meghan nor being unable to contact and talk to anyone at Kensington Palace should tell anyone with a half of a brain that there is a reason for it. Some people just cannot figure it all out and realize that in reality, its the *media* that is presenting the problem and one is a patsy being led to say more and more and that further estranges said person from the person he desperately wants to reach.

IMO, right now I think an apt statement to make about people that talk to the media about Meghan, personally, fit into the statement that goes "one can never make a stupid person do an intelligent thing".

 

[Fros]

I don't think her smile is pained or that it's because of her new family. That's garbage that Tom Markle is putting out.

I find the biggest difference is Meghan seems stiffer than before, she was much more natural in her actions and interactions with people in the beginning.

I find now she is now more measured in her reactions, second guesses herself more and seems like she is overthinking things sometimes that makes her seem lost or confused. I think scrutiny is a touch bit more than she expected as the media writes a bunch of garbage articles about all her interactions with everyone.

This actually made me sad as I feel she was great before and I keep waiting for her to relax when I see her in public now. She'll be back to her old self once she gets more comfortable into the swing of things and I look forward to it.