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06-18-2018, 09:24 PM
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Heir Apparent
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Join Date: Dec 2016
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TLLK
While I do believe that a face to face meeting with Meghan might possibly bring her father to realize how much this distresses her, the others have tossed caution to the wind a long time ago.
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You might be onto something here. It wouldn’t surprise me all of their conversations have been how the Harry and Meghan relationship have caused a lot of pain to Tom Markle. I mean he was basically given a pass free and clear after the last fiasco. Perhaps it is time someone stopped coddling him and forgive his mistake and really tell him that the distress he has caused his daughter is far greater than his hurt feelings. Wouldn't surprise me if when the news dropped about photogate and the subsequent days there is a sense of guilt on Meghan and Harry's part for this happening to Tom Markle. And he was initially a victim of press intrusion on his life simply because his daughter met and fell in love with a prince. But it's gone beyond that and it’s time someone made him realize it’s not about just him and his pride. Like I said earlier, I noticed that the only time he nearly broke down in the interview was when he was describing his image. He’s wallowing in self pity.
I'm sure things look different to him than to us. For a retired man that's living a very simple life with simple things in Mexico, having his pictures plastered all over the papers with a demeaning and perhaps mocking headline is the biggest problem he has in life and thus seem to be the most terrible thing that can happen to him. However, his daughter has to go out in front of the cameras and carry herself off flawlessly in sometimes daunting circumstances while still being picked apart. It's difficult for any of us to imagine what it'd be like to have millions of eyes on you when you step out just waiting for you to make a mistake. I remember Tom Bradby being interviewed by ITV both before and after the wedding ceremony at Windsor, he talked about how Meghan and Harry seemed when he was brought in to give them an idea of what is going to happen in the press and how to possibly deal with it. He ultimately said that really believes Meghan doesn't read what's being printed, or at least only read what she has to. It's a difficult thing and takes a lot of willpower. I only wish her father can exercise some.
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06-18-2018, 09:28 PM
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Heir Apparent
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaiaMia_53
The interview is clearly a mistake, but it happened. Hopefully under-the-radar measures will be taken to try and discreetly counsel Mr. Markle that he's being taken advantage of, and his speaking out is only hurting his image and hurting Meghan and Harry, instead of solving anything for anyone. .
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That is the rub. I don't think this man has been taken advantage of whatsoever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MaiaMia_53
To all those with fierce anger toward Mr. Markle, I too previously held a negative view of him. Now, having seen him talking in person, I am able to be a bit less harsh in my judgment toward him. While the situation is clearly painful for Meghan, she wouldn't have put out the press release that she 'has always loved her father,' if a deep love doesn't still exist.
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Funny enough in that statement she said "I have always cared for my father." The word "love" was not used and that was very much noticed by the media. Now I do think she does love him but I do think these days her feelings toward him are not very positive.
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Originally Posted by jacqui24
I think the two aren’t on the same level. Meghan had obligations to be in front of the press as part of her job. Suits bosses have gone above and beyond to shield her from the press even while she had contractual obligations. But there is that elephant in the room here and it seemed that everyone agreed to a comprise in a controlled environment. The reality is she isn’t just an average royal girlfriend. She had a career that legitimately required her to be in front of the press.
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Agreed. I don't think some realize how much NBC Universal and Meghan had to compromise. She was under contract to promote the show and she was essentially removed from a lot of it. Besides being on the show she did nothing. It was that one off TV festival but that was it. Any other actor would be fined for breach of contract but this situation was unique and they hedged their bets. It worked out.
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06-18-2018, 09:30 PM
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Royal Highness
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You are definitely onto something about Mr. Markle with your #686 post @jacqui. ITA. He has some unfortunate character failings which are getting in the way, and which the media and his woeful older children have been able to exploit.
I also agree with your response to @XeniaCasaraghi re the Vanity Fair article, which I reiterate below:
Quote:
Originally Posted by XeniaCasaraghi
I for one felt Meghan shouldn't have talked to Vanity Fair either. IMO a royal gf or fiance should stay quiet no matter what. Perhaps her dad thinks it's ok for him to talk because she talked.
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It's true that traditionally royal girlfriends have always been required to never speak out. But Meghan was already in the public eye as a successful actor, which makes a huge difference in her case.
After Meghan began dating Prince Harry, she could no longer give promotional interviews while still contracted as an actor on Suits, because she and Harry and her producers knew the media would pressure her to speak about Harry. And neither Harry nor Meghan wanted that. So Meghan stopped promoting the show with the consent of her producers, and she was rarely seen in public aside from going to yoga and going to work.
I would remind those who are forgetful that M&H spent most of their courtship completely under-the-radar, even after their cover had been blown and Harry came out with the unprecedented press release warning the tabs to back-off in no uncertain terms.
So keeping all of the above in mind, it follows that as part of the roll-out of introducing Meghan to the British public prior to the engagement announcement, M&H and KP arranged to kill two birds with one stone with the Vanity Fair interview. And also keep in mind that the VF interview was supposed to be chiefly about Meghan's career, promoting Suits' 100th episode, and speaking about her humanitarian interests.
It was definitely approved by Harry and the royals for Meghan to speak about their relationship during the interview, but she actually said very little in that regard. Yet that did not stop VF from slanting the interview and promoting it to be more about Meghan's relationship with Harry than it was intended to be, and than it actually was during the time she spent with the interviewer.
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06-18-2018, 09:41 PM
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Majesty
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Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Somewhere, Suriname
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaiaMia_53
To all those with fierce anger toward Mr. Markle, I too previously held a negative view of him. Now, having seen him talking in person, I am able to be a bit less harsh in my judgment toward him. While the situation is clearly painful for Meghan, she wouldn't have put out the press release that she 'has always loved her father,' if a deep love doesn't still exist.
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The statement didn't say that she had always loved her father but that she had always cared for him.
A very minimal way to describe her relationship with her father. It would be rather heartless not to care for your father if stress brought on by your wedding causes him heart problems.
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I'm sure she recognizes that he's ill-equipped to handle this unrelenting spotlight, but also she surely knows that he is not motivated by any kind of deceptive intent or ill will toward her and Prince Harry. That's my impression, which doesn't mean I don't suspect that Meghan and Harry haven't always gone out of their way to be as careful as possible in their interactions with Mr. Markle, especially by this point.
I agree that any future interactions will likely be brief, discreet, as well as few and far between, unless something changes in Mr. Markle's understanding and in his behavior. Perhaps someone trustworthy who is skilled in interfamilial conflict can discreetly assist in being a go-between to help Mr. Markle with his clear inability to cope with what's required of him.
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He is indeed very ill-equipped and while he seems to wish well on Harry and Meghan his actions achieve exactly the opposite. He comes across as rather self-centered and puts his own interests (wow, my daughter is now a royal duchess, I have a royal side of my family, I could have played a big part in a historical wedding with all the world watching me, even though my daughter advises against it I will stage photos and after that mission failed miserably give a long interview to improve my image) above Meghan and Harry's. Not sure whether he truly thinks his actions can't be that bad or that his is just pretending to be this ignorant of the consequences of his actions.
It is praise worthy that Meghan has such a high tolerance level but in some way that might be part of the problem right now.
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06-18-2018, 09:43 PM
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Royal Highness
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Join Date: Jun 2009
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How do I even begin to comment on this situation?.....Here goes...
I think that ultimately, relationships are based on mutual respect and trust. How are Harry and Meghan supposed to have a relationship with someone who is willing to or can be manipulated to reveal intimate details about them to the media?
While Markle Snr could have been forgiven for his actions the week of the wedding and blame it on his health, stress and embarrassment....I don't think that he can so easily be forgiven this time.
If there is a silver lining in this....it would put Meghan and Harry more on their guard when dealing with her father. I don't think that the relationships will be close....it doesn't seem to be that close now and this interview has not made things any better.
Bearing in mind that he is still Meghan's father with heart issues....nothing will be said or done by KP or BP to bring about more stress and cause another 'heart attack'. Who wants to deal with that guilt?
I think that as others have said here, communication between Harry, Meghan and her father will be related to his health and he will not be privy to any intimate details of their lives and family.
Markle Snr may have hoped to improve his image, but he may soon come to realise that he has sacrificed the most precious thing of all...a close relationship with his daughter, son-in-law and his grandchild/children.
I hope it was worth it to him!
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06-18-2018, 09:47 PM
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Member - in Memoriam
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To be honest, this is one time that Mr. Markle needs to know and see and understand all the repercussions that this interview has garnered by the press worldwide. All the interpretations and all the feedback and all the publicity his words ignited. No matter what his intentions were whether honorable or just plain "cashing in" or being a Magoo, its reached world wide attention and not in a good way.
Going back to his lone wolf existence and not realizing what his words and actions promulgated in the general scheme of things of public opinion world wide is the worse things that can happen. Perhaps Meghan needs to do some tough love one on one with her father. I don't know. Either STFU with the press or I'm cutting you out of my life is harsh but sometimes one has to be cruel to be kind to actually get a point across and have it sink in.
We'll never know what Meghan feels or thinks about all this and to be honest, none of this should have ever have been made public knowledge in the first place. I do blame the media as being the instigator to cause distress where it makes green dollars for them as people want to know the sordid details and have that window into personal relationships, analyze them and form opinions on them and I'm just as much to blame as any of us are.
It keeps me off the streets and out of trouble.
__________________
To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. ~~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~~
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06-18-2018, 10:02 PM
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Serene Highness
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I had hoped after his picture shenanigans and medical issues that he would quietly go back to enjoying retirement. This morning, IMO, made me think he must have been “stewing” over his image since the wedding—only concern for himself. Never did I expect that when we were all bantering about the blue dress did I think he would be negotiating $ for an interview. Very telling. Unfortunately, there is always going to be another instance for the Markle’s to take to the bank. I can’t “spin it” other than money and selfishness. Greed, envy, gluttony, sloth......they disgust me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Osipi
I'm not saying that he wasn't a willing participant in all this. In fact, I've stated that he willingly walked into a tank of sharks of his own free will. He just didn't perceive the fact that blood would be drawn and that this is the worst contract he could ever have made.
As stated previously too, I think some people have to make the same mistakes quite a few times before the lessons sinks in. 
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Point taken.
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06-18-2018, 10:09 PM
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Royal Highness
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Yep thanks @ACO and @Somebody, I do recall that the missive by Meghan to the press was worded very carefully and did not mention "loving" her father but rather the past tense, "always cared for my father." That definitely seemed to be a statement in and of itself, or at least somewhat cryptic. In actuality, it could just be the word that came to her, or else it was carefully worded on purpose as a way of distancing herself. We are not really privy to the personal interactions, so we are all speculating and making assumptions, which in the never-ending vicious cycle is a big reason why the media is in fact able to exploit someone vulnerable like Mr. Markle. There is huge public interest in the royals and in the persons they marry, and in their in-laws (however discreet or hapless some of the respective family members may be). We decry and despise scandals and scandal-mongerers, yet we are all tempted to be in-the-know about the ins-and-outs of the human foibles of the royals and their relations.
As we've clearly been discussing, this is a very delicate and difficult situation, and I do feel most of all for Meghan and Harry, but I also feel sorry for Mr. Markle. He was clearly a good and a nurturing father to Meghan (not to the older children unfortunately). He's also clearly somewhat of an over-sized bumbler in some aspects of his life. As I already said earlier, it's quite clear that his pride and vanity can be appealed to, and that's what's being exploited by the media and by his woeful older children. To me that's a sad fact, and nothing to beat him over the head with constantly, and with so much vituperation. Although of course, he should be made to see the consequences of his poor choices. Hopefully, this fallout won't set off more anxiety and another heart-attack though.
I'd also like to point out that I had initially detected during the engagement interview some uncertainty and anxiousness in Meghan's voice when she spoke about her Dad not having yet met Harry but that they'd spoken on the phone. She was clearly trying to be upbeat about the fact they hadn't met each other yet. There has been some question all along about Mr. Markle's situation in Mexico, his overall health, and his state-of-mind. I don't think that's really a big secret, but I do think Meghan has always chosen to look at things glass half-full and upbeat in how she approaches life. Obviously, though, she's never kept any secrets from Harry. They definitely seem to know about each other's childhood travails, and they clearly are supportive of each other regarding the life challenges they've each faced.
The other time during the interview when Meghan was apparently trying to be upbeat in order to hide some emotion is when she put a positive spin on having to leave Bogart behind in Canada. It was obvious in Harry's subtle reaction to her comments that he was concerned for the sadness she'd experienced over having to make that decision.
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06-18-2018, 10:14 PM
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Heir Apparent
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Join Date: Dec 2016
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ACO
Agreed. I don't think some realize how much NBC Universal and Meghan had to compromise. She was under contract to promote the show and she was essentially removed from a lot of it. Besides being on the show she did nothing. It was that one off TV festival but that was it. Any other actor would be fined for breach of contract but this situation was unique and they hedged their bets. It worked out.
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Yea. That situation could've been a lot worse. Even at that ATX festival where they did the script reading, Meghan's participation was strictly limited to the table read. I do believe the other actors interacted with the press on the red carpet and Meghan was allowed to skip all of those after photos. And even when they did have press on set for the 100th episode. Meghan was shielded from everything except for the photos with the cast. There are many occasions where she could've been put in a situation where the press could have access to her, but it was all handled.
While I appreciate NBC Universal and the producers taking the high road on this, I'm sure Meghan's relationships with these people that she's built over the years helped. Bonnie Hammer and Aaron Korsh do seem to speak of and treat her as more than just someone that worked for them when they have no obligation to. I remember awhile back there was an article posted about how sometimes it's more telling what they aren't saying and how it became obvious when the news broke and those that were friendly to the press wouldn't even return a simple message. The way everyone rallied around her spoke volumes to her as a person on a daily basis. I don't think those that criticized Meghan for VF interview realize how much worse this all could've been. As a prince dating an actress and being serious about it, this went about as smoothly as it could've with the press. Now, the family was a different issue.
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06-18-2018, 10:22 PM
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Courtier
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: The Beautiful PNW, United States
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Osipi
...Thomas Markle, Sr. and his daughter, The Duchess of Sussex live in worlds that are totally alien to each other and the bridges between them are very shaky ones with a lot of pitfalls. It will be immensely hard for a 73 year old man to come to grips with her world and what it entails from here on out and I do believe its best if any relationship between father and daughter from this point forward is done "under the radar" as it should have from the beginning.
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I think Meghan and her father have lived worlds apart for most of her life, and that he might even resent the fact that they have lived such different (I would even say distant) lives. It seems like it was Meghan and her mother in their own little private cocoon, and I bet that has bothered him a lot over the years.
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06-18-2018, 10:36 PM
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Royal Highness
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 Any speculation is ripe for the making I suppose. But I'm not sure I would take it so far as to speculate on the existence of any parental jealousy.  There have been clear statements by both Meghan (prior to dating Harry) and by her father in this recent interview about the nurturing role both parents played in raising Meghan. They both doted on her, they both went out of their way to ensure she received an exemplary education and together they both supported her in believing she could achieve anything she dreamed. In that at the very least, her father has been loving and unselfish.
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06-18-2018, 10:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Missy-
I think Meghan and her father have lived worlds apart for most of her life, and that he might even resent the fact that they have lived such different (I would even say distant) lives. It seems like it was Meghan and her mother in their own little private cocoon, and I bet that has bothered him a lot over the years.
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I don't know if he's jealous of Doria and Meghan's relationship. Based on what I saw this morning, he seems to be a quite introvert man who's happy to be lost in his craft. He even hinted that work played a big part in the break down of his marriage, which isn't surprising given the known long hours they used to work on set and various accountss of that. Just off top of my mind, some of Meghan's high school teacher that came forward did say very nice things about what they remember of Tom Markle from that time (same with some of the people that has worked with him in the past) and specifically mentioned that he helped with the lighting in Meghan's plays a lot. Meghan has also talked about the time she spent on set with her dad after school. There are obviously other important life lesson that Tom Markle has taught his daughter that's positive, but it wouldn't surprise me if that's the way they bonded rather than more social stuff.
I do think Meghan and her mother are a good fit personality wise in that they both seems to be more outgoing than Tom Markle. But nevertheless, it's a bond with her parents in different ways. Relationship dynamics are difficult, and it's hard to say one is better, it's a matter of what two people can bond over.
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06-18-2018, 11:13 PM
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Serene Highness
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According to Lainey, he got paid £40.000 for the interview.
As for comparing Meghan saying two lines about her OWN interview in the Vanity Fair interview vs her father disclosing private conversations from two years ago, when Meghan had asked him NOT to talk to the press are two completely different things. One was with her own and Harry's consent, the second wasn't. Snr specifically schemed and went against Meghan's wishes, and talked about her and Harry to the press, and got paid for it.
The logic, that he wanted to repair his image just doesn't compute. How did talking about how Harry asked for his blessing to propose repairs the image of Snr? How did talking about Meghan's wish to have children, but Mr Markle thinking, that she's not pregnant right now, repair his image?
IMHO this wasn't about repairing his image. It was about Mr Markle wanting a bit money he felt entitled to, and getting a proper interview, and the attention to himself again, that made him do it.
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06-18-2018, 11:32 PM
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Majesty
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
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I was in the Tom Markle is badly advised, bumbling, naive, camp, giving him the benefit of the doubt. However the news that he has been paid for the GMB interview have turned me around.
He could, if he wished to 'change his image' have given a pleasant interview about Harry and Meghan with some anodyne remarks, and no one would have turned a hair. However, getting a pay check for talking makes it a whole new kettle of fish, and a stinking one at that.
Piers M is a disgrace, but if he was approached first, as he says he was, then as a journalist first and foremost he can't be blamed for running an exclusive. How can Harry or Meghan trust Tom at all at this point? The answer is, they probably can't.
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06-18-2018, 11:36 PM
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Nobility
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While both parents provided for Meghan as a child, there is nothing introverted or reclusive whatsoever about a man that goes out of his way to personally court the media and public attention at his daughter’s expense despite her pleas and the emotional pain this undoubtedly causes. Just shameless & equally selfish of a person who proves ever so often that he has more in common (behaviour-wise) with his older two offspring.
Ah well at least Meghan can bank on her dignified mum not letting her down, a person who demonstrates time & again the essence of decorum in spite of what’s been thrown at her. Thank goodness there’s Doria to help balance out the unpleasantness.
Thomas Markle Sr is not a child either, he is an adult. If the Queen who even in her 90s knows not to exploit & hurt her children. Then there are no excuses for him. There are also the parents of other ‘married-in’ royalty (some from abroad) who have also shown proper conduct.
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06-18-2018, 11:38 PM
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Member - in Memoriam
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Without an agreed upon settlement of payment and a signed contract, this interview would never have happened. Should Mr. Markle have done this interview "out of the goodness of his heart" or for free, that would have left GMB open for all kinds of repercussions and even lawsuits. GMB lawyers made sure that all angles were covered before anyone opened their mouths with this interview. Its how things work.
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To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. ~~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~~
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06-18-2018, 11:48 PM
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Majesty
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Yes Osipi, but I wasn't really referring to Tom specifically giving an interview with Morgan and co. on GMB. There are other ways of doing this, but Tom obviously realised that GMB would create the biggest impact, within Britain anyway.
And I've read many interviews in print with a disclaimer at the end stating that the interviewee did not receive any payment for participating.
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06-18-2018, 11:48 PM
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Serene Highness
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Join Date: Nov 2016
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sophie25
All I'm saying is that none of us know that much about Meghan, not really. We are quick to say that her family members are so awful etc but we don't know enough about what they say about her to know if it's true or not. I suppose only time will tell.
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What have her family said about her that we don't know if it's true or not?
I personally can't believe, that the reporters are praising Thomas Snr as a loving father and a genuine man. Those are not the characteristics I'd use for him. He sold private conversations between himself, Meghan and Harry for this interview, without their consent. VERY private discussions. He said himself, that Harry and Meghan told him not to talk to the press, so there's no questioning if he had their permission. Piers said, that Meghan and Harry had no idea this interview was happening.
What is genuine and loving about his actions?
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06-18-2018, 11:51 PM
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Serene Highness
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Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: A, United States
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Osipi
Without an agreed upon settlement of payment and a signed contract, this interview would never have happened. Should Mr. Markle have done this interview "out of the goodness of his heart" or for free, that would have left GMB open for all kinds of repercussions and even lawsuits. GMB lawyers made sure that all angles were covered before anyone opened their mouths with this interview. Its how things work.
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That is absolutely false. You do not have to be paid for interviews. There is no law in the US or UK that says any media outlet has to pay those they use for stories. Media outlets pay to encourage folks to speak, but they have no legal liability if they do not as long as it is clear in the agreement.
Thomas Markle could have absolutely refused to take any payment for this interview and there would be no legal issue whatsoever. He chose to either ask for money or to take what was offered.
I speak about this from experience working in a high profile newsroom.
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