The Duchess of Sussex: Family and Background

[M. Payton]

Originally Posted by Dman

That’s just it. Nothing is being done to squash this mess and it will continue and start overshadowing what the focus should be on.

Tell me ...How do *you* squash this mess if Sr will not shut up? Does one gag him, put him in a corner and tell him to be quiet......what is your plan to squash this? This is not a Disney movie where one child fixes a parent out of control here, this is a parent bullying an adult who is no longer a child, this is a father who has shown his dislike of his daughter all because she has a life of her own and he expects her to drop everything and run to his side to fix him like she can? A man that is at his age should know better, he is the adult here first and she was the child now grown........Dman this is all because of whom Meghan married, this *never* happened when she was married before, when she was working on the TV show, this is only about a *Royal Prince in the most famous royal family today* NOTHING else


c

[DeeT]

Originally Posted by Dman

Very nice commentary on the Markle Debacle in ITV’s new series, The Royal Rota-

Although KP’s PR team messed up here and can help fix it - a lot of this is down to father and daughter. They’re the ones that will determine how long this mess will go on.

Stop victim blaming, the media & father messed up! It’s down to the father to shut up & stop abusing his daughter in collaboration with the media; giving an unjust & one-sided view of a personal situation. No support or money is needed to perform the simple act of closing one’s mouth.

Meghan has only been kind & supportive of her father. She has never publicly said one bad word about him or other relatives, she has remained private. The same cannot be said of them & it is disgusting that the media has given them a platform to abuse. Thank goodness Meghan has her husband, mother & other dear friends to help her through this abusive situation.

There was way too much commentary about Tom Markle on this Royal Rota show. I thought it was supposed to be about the Royals, not about a relative of the wife of the 6th in line. Also, they need to drop the unreliable tabloid-like fact checking as it seems neither of the 3 journalists are aware that Meghan has close friends of almost 20 years & they were at her wedding.

What was interesting was that so many Australians watched The Sussexes wedding on television. Hopefully, the next segment of Royal Rota will have more info about other royals, that would be much more interesting to listen to than about a non royal man.

[Madame Verseau]

If Trevor Engelson had the bank accounts of George Clooney, Steven Speilberg, George Lucas, Will Smith, Jay-Z or any other major celebrity the Markles would have been swarming him, demanding that he pull strings to get Sam and Jr cushy jobs in Hollywood and Dad gets a mansion in Beverly Hills or Bel-Air. Jr gave away the game financial support from the Windsors.

[DeeT]

Originally Posted by Spheno

Gary didn't speak about Pippa's wedding. Photographers took his pictures on wedding evening in another place with his wife and daughter.

I was mistaken. I didn’t read about Gary speaking at Pippa’s wedding, I saw pictures he posted on social media, on the wedding evening.

Thankfully neither Tom Sr or the estranged siblings can post about the Sussexes wedding. While Jr is deceptively portraying his non-relationship with Meghan as the same as Gary to Catherine, it’s pathetic that the media doesn’t challenge this. Gary has never said horrible abusive things about Catherine or that William should’ve married someone else, instead of her. Tom Jr has said these things & worse recently about Meghan, while she has never publicly said anything bad about him, & there’s plenty that is bad about him!

[soapstar]

Let's not speculate about the death of members of the BRF. Those comments have been deleted. Also let's move on from the conversation about Meghan and Harry's future children, as well as the discussion about custody.

[Dman]

Folks, I’m not victim blaming. I’m just saying that this situation is down Father and daughter.

We all agree that Mr. Markle should stop talking to the media and stop attacking his daughter through the media. Period. He’s not helping the situation at all.

No, Meghan haven’t attacked her father and haven’t engaged in his childish behavior.

Just saying that only father and daughter can squash this craziness by coming together and talking about those personal issues involved. Either Thomas have to hop on a plane or Meghan make a private visit to dad. Somebody have to put on their grownup knickers and nip this in the bud.

What could be overshadowed by the Markle Debacle? Baby announcement, my friends. Just as soon as that announcement comes, you can pretty much imagine the headlines that would emerge.

Everything just needs a new start. A lot of this didn’t have to go down like it did. It don’t have the continue either.

[O-H Anglophile]

We'd all like this to end. But Dad needs to stop talking to the tabloids for anything to change. I think Tom Jr and Samantha have about reached their expiration date as sources, so if Dad would clam up it would fade away. But things have been really bad for the past 2 1/2 months, so I'm not sure a rapprochement would be in the cards anytime soon even if Dad went silent.

[jacqui24]

Originally Posted by Dman

Folks, I’m not victim blaming. I’m just saying that this situation is down Father and daughter.

We all agree that Mr. Markle should stop talking to the media and stop attacking his daughter through the media. Period. He’s not helping the situation at all.

No, Meghan haven’t attacked her father and haven’t engaged in his childish behavior.

Just saying that only father and daughter can squash this craziness by coming together and talking about those personal issues involved. Either Thomas have to hop on a plane or Meghan make a private visit to dad. Somebody have to put on their grownup knickers and nip this in the bud.

What could be overshadowed by the Markle Debacle? Baby announcement, my friends. Just as soon as that announcement comes, you can pretty much imagine the headlines that would emerge.

Everything just needs a new start. A lot of this didn’t have to go down like it did. It don’t have the continue either.

There is one thing that you keep overlooking in this over-idealistic and overly simplified recommendation. How do you expect Meghan to trust the meeting and any discussion would remain private? Because as of right now, Tom is having trouble keeping his mouth shut for more than a week at a time. He even goes as far as to defend Samantha for the vile things she’s said. It’s Meghan’s fault that he’s threatening her and it’s Meghan’s fault that Samantha has been slandering her for almost two years. He says he takes responsibility for the paprazzi photos, but these are nothing but empty words because he got pissed when Harry just said Tom should’ve listened and none of the drama would’ve happened. I find it hard to believe someone is truly sorry when they continue to refuse full responsibility. How does anyone get over all of this? In less than a week after his latest interview, no less. It is certainly between daughter and father, and the only reason it didn’t remain that way is because Tom chose to collude with paparazzi and has been unable to shut up since. Until he’s able to remain quiet for some time, no one can blame Meghan for keeping her distance.

The thing about trust is that it’s hard to build back up when someone has taken a sledge hammer to it time and time again. We are beyond the point of nipping this in the bud. That would’ve been the photo gate, and they tried to do that. However, Tom wasn’t in a cooperative mood.

Any major Sussex news is unlikely to be overshadowed by it. It’ll be mentioned, but given that it didn’t even cast a shadow on the day of the wedding when it first begin, I doubt it would going forward as this becomes expected behavior. It’ll be bigger news when there is no other news to report, but they’ll be pushed to the background like they are every time the Sussexes show up somewhere now.

[Princess of Durham]

IMO, whenever there is special attention on Meghan the "mortifying Markles" will make their opinions known. Their move into a new house, their upcoming tour, anything that will create additional jealousy on the part of the Markles will probably elicit new interviews.

[DeeT]

I disagree with you Dman. To say that Meghan has to fix this problem is victim blaming. It’s like saying it’s her fault because she doesn’t visit her father or may not be speaking to him, he has a right to be abusive.The father has to match Meghan’s behaviour & be respectfully quiet, that doesn’t need a plane or a visit. Just simply keep his mouth closed. If he had remained quiet, there wouldn’t be as much of a problem.

There’s always been gutter press, out to cause harm, there doesn’t need to be a father assisting them, especially when his child has done her part & remained respectfully quiet. It’s time for him to act not only as a father, but as a person with basic morals.

[M. Payton]

I heard this somewhere and do not remember where:

**Trust is gained in drops and lost in buckets** and that is what Sr did to himself by talking to the media.......IMHO he will never be trusted again and should never be brought into the royal family for he can not be TRUSTED.

This falls entirely on Sr's shoulders for he is the cause of this all along with Sam and Jr........Meghan has never said a bad word about any of her family so she is not responsible to fix this problem nor to sit down and talk to her father to fix anything...........if some do not like what is going on with the markles then perhaps a break from the family thread is in order....we here can not fix the problem yet we see the abuse that is happening to Meghan and feel for her.

[Lady Reem]

Despite the support by the royals and Meghan that had been offered to this man on a platter, he betrayed Meghan but she forgave him. The man who tells lies has since gone on to betray her some more even before she cut off contact. The proven liar also said cruel stuff about Doria that was intended to undermine her to the public. This cruel individual of a so-called loving father repeatedly insults Meghan’s new in-laws and says stuff regarding her husband that are most likely made up lies anyway. And yet there are those who still expect Meghan to reward his abusive behaviour towards her. “Fix” things with her bully. The man who refuses to respect her boundaries. The same man who has gone on record to condone his eldest daughter’s vile bullying campaign against Meghan?? Just crazy.

A man who publicly goes out of his way to blackmail, abuse, humiliate, and hurt his daughter is no loving father.

And after all this, even if he does manage to keep quiet for a bit there are no guarantees he won’t inflict yet more pain with betrayals and abuse further down the line. Just imagine the effects of his claims once he is seen as someone with legitimate access to the Royal Family.

[sndral]

Originally Posted by Dman

Folks, I’m not victim blaming. I’m just saying that this situation is down Father and daughter...
Just saying that only father and daughter can squash this craziness by coming together and talking about those personal issues involved. Either Thomas have to hop on a plane or Meghan make a private visit to dad. Somebody have to put on their grownup knickers and nip this in the bud. ...
Everything just needs a new start. A lot of this didn’t have to go down like it did. It don’t have the continue either.

I am not equating Meghan’s dysfunctional family with domestic violence or child abuse situations, but I think an important lesson can be learned from research into those issues. If a woman has been a victim of domestic violence would you encourage her to ‘squash the craziness by coming together and talking’ with her abuser? Of course not, because we know and research shows that the victim of abuse in a domestic violence or child abuse situation, be it physical or mental, cannot ‘fix’ the abuser, no matter how much they want the person they love to behave differently, no matter how much they want the abuse to stop. Moreover we know in domestic violence cases those women who give their abuser chance after chance simply prolong their own suffering and abuse.
Just like a victim of DV needs to protect themselves by ending all contact with their abuser, Meghan has wisely chosen to end all contact with the Markles who continue to be abusive towards her, gas lighting her, threatening her, etc..
You cannot change another adult. Meghan cannot change her father and siblings, all she can do is what she is doing - protecting herself, her new marriage, and any future children she has from exposure to the abuse the Markles dish out.

[ACO]

Originally Posted by Dman

Just saying that only father and daughter can squash this craziness by coming together and talking about those personal issues involved. Either Thomas have to hop on a plane or Meghan make a private visit to dad. Somebody have to put on their grownup knickers and nip this in the bud.

I get that is how you feel but think it is unrealistic, naive, and problematic to expect someone to just dismiss clear abusive actions toward them. This is not on Meghan. By your own admission, she has done nothing to this man. He is the one who has attacked her constantly in the press. So again why does she have to hop on a plane or hold a private visit with a blatant bully? It won't be nipped in the bud until Thomas gets exactly what he wants and that is for the royals to bow down to him. That is never happening.

[Lady Reem]

Originally Posted by sndral

I am not equating Meghan’s dysfunctional family with domestic violence or child abuse situations, but I think an important lesson can be learned from research into those issues. If a woman has been a victim of domestic violence would you encourage her to ‘squash the craziness by coming together and talking’ with her abuser? Of course not, because we know and research shows that the victim of abuse in a domestic violence or child abuse situation, be it physical or mental, cannot ‘fix’ the abuser, no matter how much they want the person they love to behave differently, no matter how much they want the abuse to stop. Moreover we know in domestic violence cases those women who give their abuser chance after chance simply prolong their own suffering and abuse.
Just like a victim of DV needs to protect themselves by ending all contact with their abuser, Meghan has wisely chosen to end all contact with the Markles who continue to be abusive towards her, gas lighting her, threatening her, etc..
You cannot change another adult. Meghan cannot change her father and siblings, all she can do is what she is doing - protecting herself, her new marriage, and any future children she has from exposure to the abuse the Markles dish out.

The half siblings never hesitate to spew their guts to the media about Meghan’s alleged failings and how bad she is etc. And yet she is not the drunk who held a gun to a woman’s head. Meghan is not the woman with a Court substantiated record of child abuse against her.

[M. Payton]

Originally Posted by Dman

Folks, I’m not victim blaming. I’m just saying that this situation is down Father and daughter.

We all agree that Mr. Markle should stop talking to the media and stop attacking his daughter through the media. Period. He’s not helping the situation at all.

No, Meghan haven’t attacked her father and haven’t engaged in his childish behavior.

Just saying that only father and daughter can squash this craziness by coming together and talking about those personal issues involved. Either Thomas have to hop on a plane or Meghan make a private visit to dad. Somebody have to put on their grownup knickers and nip this in the bud.

What could be overshadowed by the Markle Debacle? Baby announcement, my friends. Just as soon as that announcement comes, you can pretty much imagine the headlines that would emerge.

Everything just needs a new start. A lot of this didn’t have to go down like it did. It don’t have the continue either.

Yet that is just what your doing here, in wanting Meghan to talk to her dad after he has bullied, threatened and harassed her in public you expect her to sit down and talk to him all the while he still will not be quiet and runs to the media......and Sr even went on to attack HM and called the royal family names and threaten them, so how is talking going to work here.......someone has to be STOP TALKING TO THE MEDIA and it is not Meghan, it is her father that is doing the talking. She is the victim here all the while her dad is the abuser ........your reasoning leaves me baffled and worried that in this day when mental health is mentioned time and time again how important it is to the growth of a person that Meghan has to *fix* her abuser.......beam me up Scotty for this does not make sense to me....

[Osipi]

One thing I will agree with Dman on is that its a father/daughter situation with Tom, Sr. and Meghan. Then again, any man is capable of being a father. They just have to be there at the time of conception.

Tom, Sr. has proven time and time again that he is doing an awful job of being a Dad and a parent to his child. Daddies and parents love and support and console and counsel their children to make life better for them. A father can drop bundles of money, take the child to the zoo, buy them whatever they want in expensive toys but then again, any Daddy Warbucks can do that. It doesn't take heart. A Dad treasures the first steps, the first words and feels pride and joy as the child grows into a independent human being ready to take on the world around them.

Tom, Sr., for sure, exhibits that he's a Father but he's really having a bad time of it showing that he's a Dad. When a child becomes a means to an end, is there to placate and and provide for the father and becomes a situation where no sense of love for the child is to be found and the child is able to recognize that this is abusive and psychologically damaging tactics, I would say that the the child has grown up to be a mature, independent human being in spite of her father.

Meghan learned a lot from her father. Those lessons are over and done with and I cannot, for the life of me, see either Harry or Meghan treating any of their children in a like manner.

[M. Payton]

And the very thing is........This entire situation what involves all parties, Meghan, Tom Sr, Tom Jr and Sam has been thrown into the world of the media for all to hear, read and see was done by the Markle's only, Meghan has NOT said a word and that is why the Markles are spewing their vile hate towards her.......she has remained as far as we know here, calm, dignified, and quiet. They the Markles are the abusers here, emotionally, mentality and verbally they have gone after Meghan with all barrels loaded and want a reaction from her, for her to fix them as some have indicated.........what planet are we living on here, what day and age is this......I really do not get that line of thought for it is so damaging to a child, an adult or anyone human being......

[Osipi]

We've discussed the Markles quite in depth here but the reality of it all is that, for the most part, unless the public reads and follows the tabloids or a thread here on TRF, the Markles really aren't on the world's radar as "news".

The mainstream media has mostly gone on with other things as there has never been a response at all from Meghan, Harry, the BRF or the palace staff. It made big news at the time of the wedding because of the will he/won't he walk Meghan down the aisle on the big day. For the most part, no one really is paying any attention to the Markles at all. Unless one looks for it in the tabloids.

The Markles may always have the tabloids on their speed dials to bleat whatever comes to mind but lets face it. Its the tabloids. They'll print stories about seeing Jesus in a grilled cheese sandwich if it garners attention or be the first to show a Kardashian butt in a bikini. The tabloids pander to this kind of stuff.

Meghan is a dignified, intelligent person that has a role that will put her on the world stage for things that the tabloids don't think is actually newsworthy unless she breaks protocol, has a wardrobe malfunction or mutters "!@#$" under her breath. Meghan actually is above the tabloids and I think she'll strive to remain that way.

[Cocoasneeze]

The problem here is not that Meghan and Thomas Snr haven't met up, and Meghan hasn't nipped this in the bud. Thomas Snr managed to be quiet for a year, and he knew exactly that was best for Meghan. He was offered help by KP, which be declined.
Then he got into his head, from Samantha or himself, who knows, that he didn't like the image of himself buying beer or going to MacDonald's. THAT is the root of the problem here. He's only thinking about himself, what he gets from this all. He's not thinking of how to support his own daughter, how to make her transition to the RF and to UK as easy as possible. He's thinking, how will he be the star of the show, how he's not praised enough, how he's ignored, how he's insulted, how he's belittled, how he this and that. Not one thought for Meghan. Meeting with him won't solve this. Handing him out money won't solve this. The problem is in his head, in his thinking, and he will forever demand more, and if he doesn't get it, he will go to shout about it to the tabloids.