Harry and Meghan: Wedding Suggestions and Musings

[AlowVera]

I hope after all this, Harry and Meghan go back to Botswana and have a symbolic ceremony just for themselves. It was stated that Meghan originally wanted a much smaller ceremony anyways.

[CyrilVladisla]

Will the Ascot Landau which will transport Harry and Meghan be decorated with flowers and streamers?

[MARG]

Probably not. While I don't think that the Ascot Landau is the prettiest, I know it sits the highest and will allow many more people to see them so I guess that's why they chose it.

As to Harry or Meghan wanting a small wedding, Meghan already had one of those and I think Harry knew this was as small as it would get for him.

[O-H Anglophile]

Originally Posted by AlowVera

I hope after all this, Harry and Meghan go back to Botswana and have a symbolic ceremony just for themselves. It was stated that Meghan originally wanted a much smaller ceremony anyways.

If Meghan thought she was going to have a much smaller wedding, she is marrying the wrong person.

[Ish]

Originally Posted by EloisevonLippe

^^^ Based on apparent closeness of relationship it would make sense to invite Sarah but I believe she is persona non grata to the Duke of Edinburgh and so make, efforts are made to ensure she is not around for any major royal events.

This always get said, but what royal events have happened in the last 20 years that would make sense to invite Sarah?

If the internet is to be trusted, she attended the funerals of Diana (1997) and the Queen Mother (2002), both post divorce.

She didn’t attend Edward, Peter, Zara, or William’s weddings, but we don’t know that she maintained a relationship with any of them post divorce.

There’s no reason for her to be invited to things like Jubilees or the Trooping, as she’s not a member of the Royal Family. It’s reported that she’s banned from Sandringham at Christmas and Balmoral when the DoE is there... but that’s fairly reasonable - Sandringham and Balmoral are essentially private family homes. Tolerating someone’s presence at a wedding is not comparable to inviting them to stay in your home over Christmas.

The DoE doesn’t like Sarah, and with good reason. But given as he’s a man who was willing to walk in the funeral procession of his former daughter-in-law despite not particularly liking her in order to support his grandsons, tolerated his sisters Nazi husbands, and has dined with literal dictators, I feel like he can tolerate Sarah being invited to his grandson’s wedding.

[Countessmeout]

I don't think it odd Sarah is invited, nor that she would only be to the day event

Just because one divorces a spouse, doesn't mean you divorce the whole family. Especially when kids are involved. I never got the impression William was close to the York girls, closer to Zara and Peter, and that may have an impact on him having a continued relationship with their mother. Harry on the other hand has shown he has continued to have a close bond with his cousins. Not just when they have gone on vacation together.

There are many weddings where people are only invited to the ceremony. William and Kate had 3 different guest lists. Here all 600 of the guests will be invited not only to the ceremony but to the day time reception.

The evening party will be mainly friends, and younger family members. I don't expect Charles/Camilla and older family to stay long. Charles as the host will of course stay for the dinner and cocktail hour but likely not the late night party. And the other older members of the royal family either. So not surprising Sarah would not be invited to this.

[jacqui24]

Originally Posted by Somebody

Harry might have a far more personal relationship with aunt Sarah other than 'going on a ski holiday years ago'. I'd say it completely depends on Harry's relationship with Sarah. If they know each other well because of Harry's close relationship with his cousins, it makes sense for her to be invited - good prep for the October wedding where she will have center stage as mother of the bride.

If Harry on the other hand doesn't have that kind of a relationship with her, it's totally fine if they decide not to invite her (but if the duchess of Kent is invited who only in name is married to the duke, why not also invite Sarah, duchess of York, who seems to have a far closer relationship to her former husband and his family).

Whether or not they are married DO matter when it comes to the older and more traditional members of the family. There are usually guests at a wedding that's invited by a parent or, in this case, a grandparent. The Duchess of Kent wouldn't be invited because she's personally close to Harry like some would be, but she is a member of the royal family whereas Sarah isn't. I understand that Sarah is the mother of his cousins, but you don't always invite the mother of those you are closed to to your wedding unless there is an added layer. And I'm not sure why this, oh this would be good practice for the October wedding. Practice for what? Sit there and get through it? You don't use a televised wedding to practice getting along for a ceremony that will not be televised. It's the other way around.

Originally Posted by Somebody

So, what will the duke do in October? Refuse to attend his granddaughter's wedding because her mother is coming? This might be a perfect exercise leading up to the other royal wedding this year as this time Sarah can attend low key

This is the most bizarre concept to me. Forget the fact that if DoE can't tolerate Sarah even at a wedding that Sarah is non-negotiable at, but is somehow expected to tolerate her at a wedding that she is by no means necessary. Why would anyone use a wedding that's televised globally to practice anything for a private wedding? If anything, you'd avoid any potentially tense situations when the world is watching and the media is waiting to catch any scent of discord.

[hel]

If it's true that Sarah's going, I actually think it's rather kind of Harry and Meghan towards Eugenie. If the first family event in which Sarah participates is Harry's wedding, the wedding is such a big deal that Sarah isn't going to take the focus from H&M.

Once it's over, then everyone can let out a bit of a sigh, and relax a bit about Sarah being in the same room with the RF.

However, if the first family event in which Sarah participates is Eugenie's wedding, Eugenie is likely to spend part of the happiest day of her life stressing about the tension between her mother and grandfather.

[Countessmeout]

Honestly I don't think there would be an issue. Philip may have his faults, but he is adult enough not to ruin his granddaughter's big day. He understands that her mother is her mother. If he could walk behind Diana's coffin considering how he felt about her, to support his grandsons, he can do this.

[Missjersey]

If she does go, how long do you think it will be before she gives an interview? I posted earlier for NDA

[Curryong]

when is KP going to impart something more about this wedding? Meghan's Coat of Arms for example or the Instrument of Consent or the make-up of the bridal party? There's only eleven days to go! Is everything going to be released, drip, drip, drip, bit by bit in the last five days before the 19th?

[Pranter]

No one knows...I think they are going to wait till next Monday...maybe this Friday.


LaRae

[Somebody]

Originally Posted by jacqui24

This is the most bizarre concept to me. Forget the fact that if DoE can't tolerate Sarah even at a wedding that Sarah is non-negotiable at, but is somehow expected to tolerate her at a wedding that she is by no means necessary. Why would anyone use a wedding that's televised globally to practice anything for a private wedding? If anything, you'd avoid any potentially tense situations when the world is watching and the media is waiting to catch any scent of discord.

Why would the Duke's dislike trump Harry's relationship with his aunt? If Harry wants her there, she should be there. His grandfather will have to tolerate her as the mother of the bride in a few months so can surely tolerate her as one of 600 guests in 2 weeks (if he is able to attend).

I'm not saying that Harry should invite her only so the Duke can practice but Sarah will be a prominent member at Eugenie's wedding, so if the Duke really has a hard time with that, this is great practice as this time she can be much easier ignored.

I didn't think about the televised aspect and don't think that aspect should matter that much. Any tensions that day will surely be visible as well, as we'll see pictures. And if the October wedding is the first, it will surely attract a lot of media attention (surely very negative in Eugenie's perspective) - while it will be drowned by other messages around the wedding of Harry & Meghan is 'the first'. So, yes, I agree with hel that Sarah being at this wedding is a kind gesture to Eugenie (not that they should invite her only for that reason but as it seems they have a relationship with each other this would be a nice bonus).

[Somebody]

Originally Posted by Missjersey

If she does go, how long do you think it will be before she gives an interview? I posted earlier for NDA

So, when did she last give an interview about attending Ascot with her former husband and his family? When about spending time with the Queen in recent years?

[wyevale]

Should the DoE AND the DoY's ex-wife both attend I really cannot see it would be that hard for both to be there, but no contact/words betwixt them take place..
600 OTHER people is quite a crowd..

It's not as though it would be just a few people in a semi empty room level of awkwardness, is it ?

[Pranter]

I should think they can easily avoid each other. Sarah will simply be one of several hundred and doubtful she will be anywhere near the DoE...if she is invited.

Might be tricker this October. The DoE can behave though when he wants to.


LaRae

[Mirabel]

It's been reported that Harry and Meghan often socialize with Eugenie and Jack, and they all get along very well.
So why would Harry leave Sarah out, when he knows how that would hurt Eugenie?


In a congregation of 600, she can surely avoid any close proximity to the DoE.

(Still, I expect she will give an interview, within a fortnight of the wedding. It would be typical of her).

[jacqui24]

Originally Posted by Mirabel

It's been reported that Harry and Meghan often socialize with Eugenie and Jack, and they all get along very well.
So why would Harry leave Sarah out, when he knows how that would hurt Eugenie?


In a congregation of 600, she can surely avoid any close proximity to the DoE.

(Still, I expect she will give an interview, within a fortnight of the wedding. It would be typical of her).

Why would Eugenie be hurt if her mother isn’t invited to Harry’s wedding? Are mothers expected to be invited to the weddings of everyone people are close to? Eugenie is an adult, she’ll understand. Would it make honestly make her feel better if her mother was invited, but if forced to sit elsewhere and it’s made obvious to the world she’s not a member of the family while they are?Just like Mark Phillips was not invited to any royal weddings other than his own children’s. And your expectation of how Sarah will behave is exactly why she wouldn’t be invited.

[O-H Anglophile]

Originally Posted by Mirabel

It's been reported that Harry and Meghan often socialize with Eugenie and Jack, and they all get along very well.
So why would Harry leave Sarah out, when he knows how that would hurt Eugenie?


In a congregation of 600, she can surely avoid any close proximity to the DoE.

(Still, I expect she will give an interview, within a fortnight of the wedding. It would be typical of her).

Although Sarah might be invited to the wedding, I don't see how it would hurt Eugenie if her mother wasn't/isn't invited. Eugenie is aware of the feelings some family members have about her mother and she is not a child.

[jacqui24]

Originally Posted by Somebody

Why would the Duke's dislike trump Harry's relationship with his aunt? If Harry wants her there, she should be there. His grandfather will have to tolerate her as the mother of the bride in a few months so can surely tolerate her as one of 600 guests in 2 weeks (if he is able to attend).

I'm not saying that Harry should invite her only so the Duke can practice but Sarah will be a prominent member at Eugenie's wedding, so if the Duke really has a hard time with that, this is great practice as this time she can be much easier ignored.

I didn't think about the televised aspect and don't think that aspect should matter that much. Any tensions that day will surely be visible as well, as we'll see pictures. And if the October wedding is the first, it will surely attract a lot of media attention (surely very negative in Eugenie's perspective) - while it will be drowned by other messages around the wedding of Harry & Meghan is 'the first'. So, yes, I agree with hel that Sarah being at this wedding is a kind gesture to Eugenie (not that they should invite her only for that reason but as it seems they have a relationship with each other this would be a nice bonus).

Except, she’s not his aunt. And he is very close to his grandfather. I highly doubt the Duke of Edinburgh is that petty that he can’t let his granddaughter have her day. We won’t see most of the wedding and will only see arrival and departure for Eugenie’s wedding. Highly doubt they’d arrive at the same time. And leaving is hardly going to be that long. And if they sill can’t get it together, eugenie will just have to deal with it. No need for another bride to have to worry about it on her much more public wedding just so Eugenie can have a better day. And no, there won’t be drowning out. The press will always need something negative. If Harry and Meghan won’t provide it, they’ll look for any other embarrassing stories from other guests.