Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings

[AlowVera]

Originally Posted by Osipi

Actually, if they do get engaged and then married, I expect them to have the same advantage that William and Kate had and have a few years to adjust to marriage and start a family with Meghan doing some royal engagements but not a full calendar for a while.

This gives her and Harry the opportunity to get their marriage on solid footing, start their family, set up residence(s) and allow Meghan to learn the ropes of being a British working royal gradually.

With today's political climate I don't think they will get as much time as Will and Kate, I think they would both want to hit the ground running.

[MaiaMia_53]

Originally Posted by Rudolph

It wouldn't matter if Meghan was a rocket scientist, she will be judged in Britain on how she carries herself as a royal.

The majority of royal work isn't glamorous. Meghan will be trading red carpets for planting trees and unveiling plaques.

I've said this before but it needs repeating, Meghan will have to adopt to the BRF way of doing things, not the other way around.

Well, Meghan is not a 'rocket scientist,' and it's not clear what your point is when you reference with such an exaggerated and dismissive tone, her accomplishments that I listed earlier.

Again, it's not clear to me why you think Meghan would have any trouble 'carrying herself' gracefully and regally while 'planting trees and unveiling plaques.' Simply because Meghan has worked in film and television which is seen by some to be 'glamorous,' does not mean she can't relate to the myriad demands of appearing at public ceremonies, greeting dignitaries, christening ships, shaking hands, and waving to crowds. In actual fact, acting is exhaustive and very difficult work with excruciatingly long hours, wardrobe changes, interacting with crew and castmates, hitting your spots for the camera, as well as remembering your lines and emoting at the director's behest, usually over and over again until the director is satisfied with numerous takes. And then there's often re-shoots and audio re-taping, along with press interviews, promotion on talk shows, and appearing at meet & greet events for fans, etc.

It's also difficult going on auditions as a struggling actor. Landing a successful television series is not easy or a piece-of-cake. Meghan was not just 'lucky' either. She put in the hard work and dedication to achieve the measure of success that she has with Suits, which led to her many other projects and 'giving back' opportunities (which she has also worked hard at). Also fyi, her humanitarian work with the U.N. is far from 'glamorous.'

Who said that Meghan won't be "adopting the BRF's way of doing things"? Methinks Meghan, Prince Harry and his mentors and royal staffers are way ahead of and on point regarding your apparently nagging worries about Meghan's 'royal education.' In addition, plenty of the royals have appeared quite often on 'red carpets.' In that respect, once again, Meghan Markle is much further ahead and thus better prepared than Prince Harry's former girlfriends. And even if Meghan wasn't someone used to appearing at public events and dealing with the press, how Prince Harry feels about the woman he wants to spend his life with, and how she feels about him is what's most important. Everything else works itself out in the long run, when there's strong love, trust, respect and support between two people.

[MaiaMia_53]

Originally Posted by cepe

I'm not projecting anything. You have yr opinion and thats fine.

I think that you really failed to understand my original post.

Originally Posted by cepe

... Rudolph has a point when he talks about the UK population accepting his wife. And they have good reason. She is going to represent them and they are going to pay for her. So their expectations will be high. And unfair though it may seem, she has a high hurdle to jump if she isn't British.

Dont come after me for saying that or that it isnt fair (Ive already said that myself). Life isnt fair and people's expectations will be high.

What is important is that H doesnt say "dont worry it will all be fine". His future wife needs to understand just how difficult it can be and have the support. Which I think he will ensure.

But as it stands, H has a girlfriend and thats it.

I'll wait and see.

So above is your original post. You appear to be stressing mostly that the "UK population has to accept Harry's wife," and that "their expectations will be high," an admonition you mentioned twice. Plus you seem to feel that Meghan has "unfair" shortcomings and "high hurdles" to overcome because "she isn't British." But then you admit that Prince Harry will have her back.

I agree with your last three sentences. Harry absolutely has Meghan's back, and she is his girlfriend. And we all have to wait and see what transpires in the future.

OTOH, if I were you, I would definitely cease worrying about Meghan not being British, and also I'd forget about the "unfair" obstacle course of "the U.K. population having to accept Harry's wife." The ball is in Prince Harry's court, and I think he's going to take the ball in one hand, while securely embracing Meghan with his other hand as they both take their time moving forward at their own pace jumping over 'hurdles' with loads of grace to score a touchdown. Whoever in the Brit public isn't cool with cheering them on, won't matter. They are going to set their own expectations for a possible forthcoming marriage. If it gets that far, I think they'll both be in it to win it.

Originally Posted by ladongas

She's young(ish), beautiful, and charismatic, and surely people who want Harry to be happy will respond favorably to the woman he loves.

I agree. I also think that people of goodwill who meet Meghan up-close-and-personal will respond to her favorably.

[MaiaMia_53]

Originally Posted by AlowVera

I agree but the tabs will always try and spin the story to create drama. So in that case they need to get in front of the spin. Especially with an American bride they will try to push the princess pushy narrative.

Originally Posted by Pranter

Oh yes..look what they try with Kate and Diana ...the woman's been dead 20 years and they try to put her up against Kate...folks have to stop reading those rags.

Indeed! I also agree with you @Pranter that the lovely Kate will welcome her prospective sister-in-law into the fold, and that together with their royal partners, they will present a united front.

The tabloids will most likely continue with their nonsense, which the royals will mostly ignore, unless and until a line gets crossed. When and if that happens, it will be dealt with firmly. The royal brothers will see to that. They will be standing strong together, particularly in maintaining their family privacy and in protecting their wives from OTT press intrusiveness.

Getting along with family members in any family setting comes with time and effort. The public will not be privy to all of what goes on behind palace walls. There's a lot we don't know already about Meghan's interactions with members of Harry's immediate family. Nor do we know anything about his probable meetings with her parents. And it's actually none of our business.

[Dee Anna]

Why on earth should Meghan and William or Meghan and Kate not get on??!

Anymore than why should Harry and Kate not get on??! Same scenario, same drivel!

Everyone has a personality and have to live with the people in their immediate personal orbit. That the two princes are close is a given, Kate had a long apprenticeship, Meghan, already a public figure in her own right, has moved into a different light. I can see these four having the best family realtionship. Why ever not??!

[MARG]

The supposed rivalry, dislike and downright hate are being written as we speak. You Tube is full of such nasty stories. You'll find them in the same place you find the stories of Charles forbidding the marriage, Catherine appalled that the low-rent actress has her claws in her adoring brother-in-law and our drunken Queen is trying to keep an even drunker, gin-soaked Camilla, from blackmailing Charles and taking him to the cleaners in their epic, multi-million dollar, divorce!

ps: Got a ring from my sister and brother-in-law last night. They are on a golfing holiday with friends in Brisbane, Australia. They were all aghast about how evil Camilla was in the pre "divorce" money grab reported in one of the tabloid magazines on sale. He thought I could settle the debate about whether or not it was true since I belonged to that "forum thing about royals". Cracked me up no end!

[princesslily]

This reply is not directed to anyone's post. Just sharing my updated opinion on this matter which isn't important, just freedom of speech.

I do believe Harry will marry Meghan because he feels she's the only one that will take on the duties and he really wants to be married and have a family of his own.

But just visiting each other back and forth after just over a year of dating and proposing is crazy. I'm not saying it won't or has happened as I understand the supposed rush because of Meghan's age, but they really need to live together for one year while Harry introduces her to the BRITISH public gradually before an official engagement is announced. This rushing is nuts!

PS: Anyone that says "well I met my husband and we got engaged after only a few months" is not understanding this is not a normal simple life marriage. Meghan will be taking on a highly public job where she will be representing the British public and we will be paying her to do so.

My own opinion, Meghan is not suitable because of her reputation, involving sexualised scenes and photos. Sorry, but this is just my opinion and a lot of BRITISH public opinion. We are the ones paying the taxes and this is what we feel.

Harry will still marry her though because honestly, it's his choice and he's not going to be King. Still, she's unsuitable to be a member of the senior Royal family.

This is my own opinion and freedom of speech. You may disagree with me. I don't mind.

[Osipi]

When it comes to the point of the British people and their acceptance of Meghan as Harry's bride, the only importance in that is that it will determine how many people line the route on the day of their wedding.

Meghan is not applying for a job. Meghan is not auditioning for role which will base her permanently in the UK. Meghan is not running for political office. Meghan is not aiming to fill the thickest scrapbook in the world of Fail articles about her.

What Meghan will do if she accepts a proposal from Harry, wear his ring and eventually walk down the aisle towards him is to promise to love, honor and cherish him. That's right. Him. Harry. He will do likewise most likely with the biggest smile ever seen on his face. That's it. Those are the vows they will make. Everything else that comes with the marriage is secondary. They will not walk into this blindly. They will be prepared. They will handle the good, the bad, the ugly and the silly together from that point forward.

So, I think looking at it this way, the reality is that outside of how Harry and Meghan feel about each other, nothing else matters when it comes to the decision they'll make on whether to travel life together as husband and wife.

Its been stated several places that perhaps Harry has found his "Kate". Just over the past year getting to know a bit more about Meghan, there is one reaction I could imagine Kate having. "Oh wonderful! A tennis partner, another sister and friend!" I think Kate and Meghan will get along like peanut butter and jelly. We'll see.

[Cocoasneeze]

I'm a bit confused, about this task about Meghan having to win over the British public. Like @Osipi said, she's not auditioning for a role or applying for a job, but dating Harry and possibly marrying him. The British public has no say in this. The British public will deal, and IMHO most of the British public couldn't care less whom Prince Harry marries, as long as they're not a career criminal.

As for them only seeing each other back and forth visiting each other, to me it seems like they've actually lived with each other quite a bit, longer periods of time than we might think, and know each other well. Also, Meghan isn't some naive little girl moving to a new country with her first boyfriend. She's an adult woman who has already moved from one country to another and adapted really well made a home for herself in that country. She's an adult woman who has a lot of life experiences behind her, and to me she seems like she's learned from her experiences a lot. She seems to like UK, and will do just fine living in the UK, and making it her home, too.

[princesslily]

This is a job, not just a marriage, sadly. She will be representing us and we are paying for it.

With all the complaining he's been doing since dating Meghan, maybe he should step down from his title and tax benefits and live off his mother's inheritance? I'm sure Meghan will stay with him. She does love him right?

[NoShades]

Originally Posted by MARG

The supposed rivalry, dislike and downright hate are being written as we speak. You Tube is full of such nasty stories. You'll find them in the same place you find the stories of Charles forbidding the marriage, Catherine appalled that the low-rent actress has her claws in her adoring brother-in-law and our drunken Queen is trying to keep an even drunker, gin-soaked Camilla, from blackmailing Charles and taking him to the cleaners in their epic, multi-million dollar, divorce!

ps: Got a ring from my sister and brother-in-law last night. They are on a golfing holiday with friends in Brisbane, Australia. They were all aghast about how evil Camilla was in the pre "divorce" money grab reported in one of the tabloid magazines on sale. He thought I could settle the debate about whether or not it was true since I belonged to that "forum thing about royals". Cracked me up no end!

Except Meghan is NOT a "low-rent" actress however much some would desperately like for her to be viewed as such. She may not have been a classically trained high profile actress but that surely doesn't classify her as low-rent. She obtained a full education and has work experience in other areas as others have already mentioned. Everyone will have their opinions though which they are completely entitled to and that's fine. Meghan's parents are not money-bags and it is actually quite an achievement what she's accomplished so far, considering...

Anyway, tabloids and a certain type of people will always be snide with their noses up in the air just as they previously were with the unkind narrative of DoC knocking her down as---'Waity Katie with her grasping social climbing mother & family desperately clinging on, hanging around for eons waiting for the ring'---.

That description was so unfair and I'm sure no one with any common sense ever gave that load of tosh any credence.

That being said, what has been happening to Meghan though is just plain nasty as well as sinister. The subliminal, underlying tones of racism & prejudice is undeniable, and most times it's just outright there.

A lot of the comments and article pieces from the DF are a complete disgrace in my opinion.

[cepe]

When you marry into any royal family, you are taking on a job - for life. Everything you say, do, don't do, did in the past, wear, yr friends and family, the marriage ALL come under minute scrutiny.

That's the point - that is the reason why, as Harry has said, its difficult to find someone to "take it all on"

[princesslily]

This is exactly what I was trying to say. It's a job not just a marriage thank you.

[Osipi]

Originally Posted by princesslily

This is a job, not just a marriage, sadly. She will be representing us and we are paying for it.

With all the complaining he's been doing since dating Meghan, maybe he should step down from his title and tax benefits and live off his mother's inheritance? I'm sure Meghan will stay with him. She does love him right?

If I'm not mistaken, the only thing that directly is paid by the taxpayers when it comes to Harry's wife would be her security. Indirectly, taxpayer funds are used to cover the cost of official royal engagements Meghan would undertake on behalf of the Queen.

Harry isn't strapped financially and their private lifestyle and any staff would be supplemented by Charles' own personal income from the Duchy of Cornwall as he now finances Camilla, the Cambridge family and Harry.

Not much to be concerned about Meghan gobbling up taxpayer funds at all if you look at the reality of it. Her job as a senior working royal comes with the marriage and not the marriage with the job of being a senior working royal.

As for the racist comments, they are something that isn't allowed here and would have been long deleted by now. If you're that interested, Google is your friend.

[Helen6010]

Originally Posted by princesslily

This reply is not directed to anyone's post. Just sharing my updated opinion on this matter which isn't important, just freedom of speech.

I do believe Harry will marry Meghan because he feels she's the only one that will take on the duties and he really wants to be married and have a family of his own.

But just visiting each other back and forth after just over a year of dating and proposing is crazy. I'm not saying it won't or has happened as I understand the supposed rush because of Meghan's age, but they really need to live together for one year while Harry introduces her to the BRITISH public gradually before an official engagement is announced. This rushing is nuts!

PS: Anyone that says "well I met my husband and we got engaged after only a few months" is not understanding this is not a normal simple life marriage. Meghan will be taking on a highly public job where she will be representing the British public and we will be paying her to do so.

My own opinion, Meghan is not suitable because of her reputation, involving sexualised scenes and photos. Sorry, but this is just my opinion and a lot of BRITISH public opinion. We are the ones paying the taxes and this is what we feel.

Harry will still marry her though because honestly, it's his choice and he's not going to be King. Still, she's unsuitable to be a member of the senior Royal family.

This is my own opinion and freedom of speech. You may disagree with me. I don't mind.

I agree - I do not understand the push for any marriage to happen so quickly. As you say she would be taking on a job, and the entire BRF, not just Prince Harry. She would need to understand how the whole systems works and the part she would be expected to play, and that is to be supportive and not upstage the BRF. There is no "Princess School " and Diana and Sarah suffered as a result. Catherine and Sophie had the benefit of very long courtships in which to observe and learn. After all, this is the way the royals themselves learn the job.

I also agree that British public opinion is important. If there is to be a marriage, Meghan needs to be properly introduced and this takes time. The sort of publicity they are attracting at the moment is not IMHO terribly helpful. A longer courtship, with time in the UK, is needed.

[princesslily]

Isn't Prince Charles' income funded by the public?

I understand we are going off topic here, but their palaces (including Prince Harry's accomodation), transport, everything is funded by the public as well as the Queen's investments.

I'm sure it isn't only her security. Their future country home's renovations will be funded by the public. Her lifestyle is paid by us, including her private holidays once she marries.

Right, it would be better for them to live together for one year and during that time gradually introduce her to the British public.

I still believe she's not appropriate for the job because of her sexualised career. Though I have no say apparently as a member of the tax paying British public.

I also thought Harry inherited millions from his mother? He could happily live without a title and royal duties, join the army, and visit Africa as often as he likes. He would love that. Would Meghan?

It must seem romantic going back and forth visiting each other, but living together for one year and getting into the routine of a "married" couple would really prove they are compatible. I don't believe they are compatible, but again just my opinion. Harry loves the safari camping holidays, Meghan loves the luxury resort holidays. I hope I'm wrong and Meghan isn't just putting up with these holidays.

All in all, I truly hope it works out for Harry.

[Mirabel]

I don't think it would surprise anyone that the tabloids will dredge up all kinds of mean-spirited stories, should Harry and Meghan get engaged!

(One example: the "feud" between the Yorks and the Middletons; that one lasted until a beaming Eugenie strolled into Pippa's wedding!)

There will be all kinds of such inventions by the press. The best thing the RF can do is simply ignore the criticisms, and carry on.

[Cocoasneeze]

Originally Posted by cepe

When you marry into any royal family, you are taking on a job - for life. Everything you say, do, don't do, did in the past, wear, yr friends and family, the marriage ALL come under minute scrutiny.

That's the point - that is the reason why, as Harry has said, its difficult to find someone to "take it all on"

This is very true.

My point was mainly, that the British public still has no say. That would be insane. Let's have a public vote whom Harry should marry.

[Denville]

Yes of course the RF own many properties and one will be given to Harry when he gets married.

[Osipi]

Originally Posted by princesslily

Isn't Prince Charles' income funded by the public?

I understand we are going off topic here, but their palaces (including Prince Harry's accomodation), transport, everything is funded by the public as well as the Queen's investments.

I'm sure it isn't only her security. Their future country home's renovations will be funded by the public. Her lifestyle is paid by us, including her private holidays once she marries.

Charles' personal income is from the interest earned by the Duchy of Cornwall which he pays income tax on and does not rely on any taxpayer monies. A suggestion would be to read and understand where all the taxpayer funds go as far as the royal family is concerned. The Queen's personal income comes from the interest earned from the Duchy of Lancaster which the Queen uses to aid and support other members of the royal family outside of Charles'. There is a dedicated thread to this.

http://www.theroyalforums.com/forums...s-9826-53.html

https://www.royal.uk/financial-reports-2016-17

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/ukne...come-from.html

As far as homes, we've seen with W&K's Apt. 1A that the necessary renovations to the building itself (Kensington Palace) was paid for by the Sovereign Grant (see link above) and the personal choices of decorating at KP and at Amner Hall were funded privately.

William and Kate's Home Refurbishment Cost More Than $6.5 Million

Sorry for going off topic but when it comes to Harry and Meghan's relationship and who's going to be financing this couple, its important to realize that Meghan will not be dependent or rely on taxpayer funds for her own personal lifestyle. As the tabloids keep pushing articles that are filled with Fail commentators screaming "spongers!", its good to dispel these rumors with cold, hard facts.

There is a lot of information here Princesslily, that will tell you everything you need to know about how the royal family works, where their money comes from and who pays what. Its well worth reading.