Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings

[Biri]

As far as "princess" lessons, I really expect Harry and Meghan to be given the same consideration that Will and Kate were when they were first married. Just part time engagements and have time just for themselves to adjust to marriage and start a family. We're not going to be seeing Meghan jumping into full scale working duties the minute she removes her bridal veil. Remember after Will and Kate's wedding, they were able to live in Wales with Wills in the RAF for two years after the wedding. The "princess" lessons will be an ongoing thing after she's married with a bit of hands on experience here and there.

It just makes sense to me that the first priority this couple is going to have is to start their own family.

Especially taking into consideration Meghan's age: she is 36 and two months old now, her biological clock is already ticking in an accelerated pace; Kate was 29 and three months old when she married William, so she had time to learn princess' things and simultaneously adjusting the life of two.

 

[jacqui24]

I'm not basing my thoughts on Harry and Meghan being already engaged from any sort of media speculation but rather from knowing how it was with Will and Kate. They were actually engaged and family and friends knew about it for a while before the actual public announcement. Its very possible that this is exactly what Meghan meant by "this is our time".

The public *and* the media will be informed at the same time with an official announcement probably made at Kensington Palace. It is then that we'll probably have quite a few more details. Like Meghan's mom being at the Invictus Games, I wouldn't be surprised if we're thrown for a loop with stuff we didn't expect at all.

Its fun to sit and wait and wait and wait and think and think some more as we wait and wait and wait. Makes life interesting I think. ?

Kate and William got engaged in October, and it was announced in November. Hardly a long time. It's hard to keep secrets for long once you've already informed close family and friends. Sometimes things slip accidentally. Word will get out. Meghan said this is their time as in private time, and one day they might have to come forward and share their story. Hardly insinuating engagement right now. If anything, I took it to be that she understood they'll have to come forward and be more in front of cameras once they are engaged.

Especially taking into consideration Meghan's age: she is 36 and two months old now, her biological clock is already ticking in an accelerated pace; Kate was 29 and three months old when she married William, so she had time to learn princess' things and simultaneously adjusting the life of two.

Which is exactly why they are already on an accelerated pace. However, like you said, they wouldn't have as much time to adjust to life for two and simultaneously learn princess things once they are married. Some things need to be worked out before they just take the plunge.

 

[Pranter]

I think it's worth remembering that like all other couples, they would get engaged first and then start thinking about the wedding.

An engagement announcement is unlikely to happen with a clear, set-in-stone time-frame for the wedding - they will only have a vague idea themselves of when the wedding could be.

But I do agree, the situation is slightly different for Meghan since she does not live in Britain. Even if she and Harry have already agreed to get married or they feel it is likely to be on the cards for them to do so, I can't help but think that she will relocate to the UK first (or at least start spending more and more time here) and after a few more months if and when they are ready, then we will see an announcement.

I'm know this will not be helpful to those who wish for a quicker engagement - I'm sorry!

They aren't like other couples though in some ways....if they already have an understanding ...most likely some of the wedding details are already being worked out/planned. So when the announcement comes they can slide right into things without all the dithering about on the basics.


LaRae

 

[hel]

There's only so much pre-planning you can do before an announcement, really. It might be possible for Harry's private secretary to start a list of ideas, and plans to plan, but the moment you involve other people (picking up the phone to inquire about church availability, for example, or engaging the caterers at either WC or BP) those become potential points of leakage.

So I think that very little of the actual planning will occur until the announcement.

 

[Pranter]

Ya'll have never been around ladies who have been planning their weddings since they were 6 lol They have a whole book of ideas of how they want to see it done.

You can do a lot of planning without calling anyone. Lots of decisions can be made ahead of time if a person wants to do that.


LaRae

 

[miss whirley]

I don't think that Meghan's parents would be treated any less than the Middletons have been. For all we know, Meghan's mom may have already met the Queen, Charles and Camilla and the Cambridges. The days of a royal bride expected to give up her family on special occasions have long passed.

We'll just have to watch and see what happens.

Not less. But you seem to be theorizing that the Markles are being treated better than the Middletons. Catherine's parents didn't meet The Queen until a few weeks before the royal wedding. The idea that Meghan's mom has already met The Queen is a bit much, imo.

Kate seems most likely due mid March to early April (making her 2-2 1/2 months when they announced).

I don't see that as most likely. In 2014, she announced a pregnancy is early September (like this pregnancy), and didn't have the baby until May 2nd. Also with her previous pregnancies, KP has announced her due month after her 12 week scan. We have yet to get an announcement this pregnancy, so it seems the 12 week scan hasn't happened yet. I'm not seeing a March birth in the cards, even early April is starting to look unlikely.

 

[soapstar]

Kate and William got engaged in October, and it was announced in November. Hardly a long time. It's hard to keep secrets for long once you've already informed close family and friends. Sometimes things slip accidentally. Word will get out. Meghan said this is their time as in private time, and one day they might have to come forward and share their story. Hardly insinuating engagement right now. If anything, I took it to be that she understood they'll have to come forward and be more in front of cameras once they are engaged.

Also, the reason for the delay in Kate and Willam's engagement announcement was because Kate's grandfather had passed away.

I'm in agreement about there being no engagement yet. I think they've talked about it, but I don't believe there will be a proposal until after Meghan wraps her show and she's moved to London and settled in. I can see a January engagement with a June wedding. I just realized Trooping is in June, so maybe a July wedding.

 

[jacqui24]

I'm in agreement about there being no engagement yet. I think they've talked about it, but I don't believe there will be a proposal until after Meghan wraps her show and she's moved to London and settled in. I can see a January engagement with a June wedding. I just realized Trooping is in June, so maybe a July wedding.

Garter ceremony is also in June, so I definitely think June is out for an additional major event.

 

[miss whirley]

Garter ceremony is also in June, so I definitely think June is out for an additional major event.

June 30th is a Saturday, so June isn't totally ruled out. But yeah, I think it would have to be late June because of all the events in the earlier part of the month.

 

[Abbigail]

There are about 8 months between Suits wrapping up and the Queen leaving for Balmoral (end of July), assuming that Harry and Meghan want to be married (and start a family) it is not a rush at all to get married before August and I still haven't read a convincing argument for postponing until October or so.Evenmore, the wedding preparations can start before the official announcements. Normal people have to plan a wedding next to their day jobs, Harry and Meghan will have staff to do the actual organizing, they only need to do most of the thinking (and trying on the dress a few times, well Meghan would); which probably ends up taking the same amount of time given that theirs is larger.

Yeah, I'm just not seeing it.

Lets say Meghan moves to London in December or even January. That leaves 8/9 months where she is restricted in where she can go, what she can do, all while Harry will be out and about doing engagements and such. That'll likely result in a lot of awkwardness and loneliness for a woman who will have given up everything to move to another country. At least if they are engaged at the start, she will be able to play a more active role, instead waiting around until the engagement is announced and then eventually the wedding. As far as I can see, there is very little incentive for her to uproot her life without an official engagement.

 

[jacqui24]

Yeah, I'm just not seeing it.

Lets say Meghan moves to London in December or even January. That leaves 8/9 months where she is restricted in where she can go, what she can do, all while Harry will be out and about doing engagements and such. That'll likely result in a lot of awkwardness and loneliness for a woman who will have given up everything to move to another country. At least if they are engaged at the start, she will be able to play a more active role, instead waiting around until the engagement is announced and then eventually the wedding. As far as I can see, there is very little incentive for her to uproot her life without an official engagement.

I'm not sure where the 8/9 months of waiting around if the wedding is in October comes from. She'll start attending engagements before the wedding, and the wedding planning would be going full speed head. Keep in mind that it's only 2-3 months than prior to summer. Are you also saying she'll be sitting around for those months? I highly doubt she'd be sitting around all alone with nothing to do in either case.

The convincing argument is that Meghan has to have time to take care of things before they can announce, and the calendar is pretty packed for April, May, June, and most of July around. April 1 is Lent, so that's out. Then if Kate is due in late April/early May, they probably wouldn't have it then because it's just so close to the due date that you never know and then she'll have to recover. June has Trooping and Garter ceremony, and then the Queen leaves for Balmoral in July. Somewhere in there, you also have to factor in Royal Ascot. The staff will be stretched pretty thin if they have to add a wedding in there. I think they can definitely do August or September, but the Queen is at Balmoral. I just can't see a wedding for Harry to be anywhere else other than WA or St. George at the minimum. Even if it's at St. George, it won't be like wedding for Peter Phillips. There is more planning involved because Harry is a full time working royal and keeps a much higher profile.

 

[Pranter]

If she moves without an announcement it will come soon after I'm thinking. They already know what the plan is on that.


LaRae

 

[Abbigail]

I'm not sure where the 8/9 months of waiting around if the wedding is in October comes from. She'll start attending engagements before the wedding, and the wedding planning would be going full speed head. Keep in mind that it's only 2-3 months than prior to summer. Are you also saying she'll be sitting around for those months?I highly doubt she'd be sitting around all alone with nothing to do in either case.

The convincing argument is that Meghan has to have time to take care of things before they can announce, and the calendar is pretty packed for April, May, June, and most of July around. April 1 is Lent, so that's out. Then if Kate is due in late April/early May, they probably wouldn't have it then because it's just so close to the due date that you never know and then she'll have to recover. June has Trooping and Garter ceremony, and then the Queen leaves for Balmoral in July. Somewhere in there, you also have to factor in Royal Ascot. The staff will be stretched pretty thin if they have to add a wedding in there. I think they can definitely do August or September, but the Queen is at Balmoral. I just can't see a wedding for Harry to be anywhere else other than WA or St. George at the minimum. Even if it's at St. George, it won't be like wedding for Mark Phillips. There is more planning involved because Harry is a full time working royal and keeps a much higher profile.

No, I'm saying instead of spending 2-3 months at the start being restricted in what she can do as a girlfriend, she can play a more active role as a fiancee.You argue that she has to have time to take care of things, as if that will take months and she will be so overwhelmed that she can't do anything else? Also, there are not many engagements she can attend pre-marriage, so I'm not seeing the benefits of delaying until Oct/Nov.

The calendar is not packed in either April, May or July. If you want to argue that April/May is out because of Kate's pregnancy, fine. That still leaves early/mid-July. A wedding could most certainly happen before the Queen leaves for Balmoral.

 

[Molly2101]

I don't know why people are saying that June is not a possibility for a wedding as there are too many things happening. Sophie and Edward married in June the week after Trooping the Colour, Order of the Garter and Ascot...the Queen had no issue with their wedding date choice or the month so I can't see her having a problem with it now.

 

[Pranter]

Yeah they can marry in June easily. They can marry in May easily ...April might be tricky due to the Cambridge baby.


LaRae

 

[Cocoasneeze]

I simply don't see her moving to UK without being engaged and a wedding date set. I think, that once she moves to UK, soon after they'll announce their engagement, and a few weeks from that a wedding date will be announced. I'm one of those, who thinks, that they're actually engaged already. This is not just a simple, everyday normal relationship, with an early engagement announcement, it'll open so many doors for Meghan, whereas there'd be loads of restrictions without an official engagement announcement. We saw it at the IG games. I bet it would've been much easier, comfortable and all around normal, had Meghan been able to sit with Harry. If she's 'just' a girlfriend, these restrictions would happen all the time.

 

[miss whirley]

No, I'm saying instead of spending 2-3 months at the start being restricted in what she can do as a girlfriend, she can play a more active role as a fiancee.You argue that she has have time to take care of things, as if that will take months and she will be so overwhelmed that she can't do anything else? Also, there are not many engagements she can attend pre-marriage, so I'm not seeing the benefits of delaying until Oct/Nov.

The calendar is not packed in either April, May or July. If you want to argue that April/May is out because of Kate's pregnancy, fine. That still leaves early/mid-July. A wedding could most certainly happen before the Queen leaves for Balmoral.

The 5th-in-line's Christening will also happen in early/mid July before The Queen leaves for Balmoral. I'm not sure The Queen will want these two religious ceremonies bunched together, and overshadowing each other. I think at least a 3 week buffer between the two is preferable. It'll be a very tight squeeze to fit in everything.

 

[Pranter]

I simply don't see her moving to UK without being engaged and a wedding date set. I think, that once she moves to UK, soon after they'll announce their engagement, and a few weeks from that a wedding date will be announced. I'm one of those, who thinks, that they're actually engaged already. This is not just a simple, everyday normal relationship, with an early engagement announcement, it'll open so many doors for Meghan, whereas there'd be loads of restrictions without an official engagement announcement. We saw it at the IG games. I bet it would've been much easier, comfortable and all around normal, had Meghan been able to sit with Harry. If she's 'just' a girlfriend, these restrictions would happen all the time.

I think they have come to the decision that yes they are getting married ...whatever someone wants to call it. I don't know if he has formally proposed or not but they have a plan in place.


LaRae

 

[Abbigail]

I don't know why people are saying that June is not a possibility for a wedding as there are too many things happening. Sophie and Edward married in June the week after Trooping the Colour, Order of the Garter and Ascot...the Queen had no issue with their wedding date choice or the month so I can't see her having a problem with it now.

I mostly have doubts in relation to the venue. For instance, if Edward and Sophie were married at WA, would they have had a June wedding? If Harry and Meghan were married at St George's then yeah, it seems June wouldn't be out of the question.

 

[jacqui24]

No, I'm saying instead of spending 2-3 months at the start being restricted in what she can do as a girlfriend, she can play a more active role as a fiancee.You argue that she has to have time to take care of things, as if that will take months and she will be so overwhelmed that she can't do anything else? Also, there are not many engagements she can attend pre-marriage, so I'm not seeing the benefits of delaying until Oct/Nov.

The calendar is not packed in either April, May or July. If you want to argue that April/May is out because of Kate's pregnancy, fine. That still leaves early/mid-July. A wedding could most certainly happen before the Queen leaves for Balmoral.

So you think all the princess lessons are just a walk in the park? In her case, they'll probably have to add some historic lessons in there for good measures since it's not taught as much in the US school systems. Believe it or not, those behind the scenes stuff do take a long time. Kate had a much longer period to adjust and absorb all of it. Plus, I'm sure her citizenship will be expedited, but there are probably still steps to go through and will take a little bit of time there.

 

[Abbigail]

You think she's going to learn it all in matter of months? No, either way, she's going to be learning "on the job" presumably even beyond her first year of marriage. In that sense, I don't think delaying a few months will make that much of a difference.

And as has been stated, I'm sure there are some things that are already in motion, including her visa/citizenship.

 

[miss whirley]

I mostly have doubts in relation to the venue. For instance, if Edward and Sophie were married at WA, would they have had a June wedding? If Harry and Meghan were married at St George's then yeah, it seems June wouldn't be out of the question.

I agree. I can't think of a large London royal wedding that has happened in June. At least not amongst the descendants of George V and Mary.

I suppose next year could be an exception as Trooping is happening relatively early in the month, June 9th. If they got married June 30th, 3 weeks later, it might be feasible, but even then I'm dubious.

 

[Pranter]

Some folks are pretty knowledgeable on their own because they study various things...history is something some folks do on their own too. So we really don't know Meghan's knowledge of British history or the BRF ..although I'd say she's been studying up on the BRF and I'm sure Harry and she have talked about the various items.

She's going to have time after they marry too....I would imagine she will get a grace period just as Kate did. I doubt they will be expected to marry and hit the ground running in the manner his parents did.



LaRae

 

[jacqui24]

You think she's going to learn it all in matter of months? No, either way, she's going to be learning "on the job" presumably even beyond her first year of marriage. In that sense, I don't think delaying a few months will make that much of a difference.

And as has been stated, I'm sure there are some things that are already in motion, including her visa/citizenship.

Is she going to learn everything in matter of months? No. Should all the important stuff before covered though? Yes.

Nothing is going to be put in motion until they are officially engaged. And I just don't buy that they are already officially engaged. Hence, I think there'll be longer time in between when they actually get engaged to an announcement. And like someone has already said, it's unlikely the actually planning would be starting until after an official announcement to prevent leaking.

 

[Pranter]

I don't think anyone here is claiming they are officially engaged. You can call it whatever...but I think what most people believe is that they have come to an understanding...they have a plan to marry. Has he asked her formally? No one knows.

LaRae

 

[jacqui24]

I don't think anyone here is claiming they are officially engaged. You can call it whatever...but I think what most people believe is that they have come to an understanding...they have a plan to marry. Has he asked her formally? No one knows.

LaRae

There has been plenty comments from posters that said they believe they are officially engaged and thus paperwork have started. Then using that as a basis that the announcement can be made soon after Suits is done. My point is that nothing would be put in motion in terms of her citizenship until they are engaged regardless of what their understanding regarding the direction of relationship.

 

[miss whirley]

Some folks are pretty knowledgeable on their own because they study various things...history is something some folks do on their own too. So we really don't know Meghan's knowledge of British history or the BRF ..although I'd say she's been studying up on the BRF and I'm sure Harry and she have talked about the various items.

She's going to have time after they marry too....I would imagine she will get a grace period just as Kate did. I doubt they will be expected to marry and hit the ground running in the manner his parents did.



LaRae

Diana didn't hit the ground running. She also had a grace period. If you look at the Diana's royal engagements thread, they have these listed.

1981

February, 24 : Announcement of the engagement
February, 27 : Visit to Cheltenham

March, 09 : Reception to raise funds for the Royal Opera House
March, 13 : Grand Military Gold Cup

May : Visit to Tetbury

June, 06 : Polo Match
June, 10 : Banquet for the King of Saudi-Arabia
June 13 : Trooping the Colour
June 15 : Order of Garter
June, 28 : Polo Match

July, 08 : Polo Match
July, 11 : Polo Match
July, 12 : Polo Match
July, 24 : Premiere "For Your Eyes Only"
July, 25 : Polo Match at Tidworth
July, 26 : Polo Match at Smith's Lawn
July, 29 : Wedding

November, 04 : Visit to Splenders of the Gonzagas Exhibition
November, 12 : Visit to Chesterfield

1982

March, 04 : Night of the Knights
March, 18 : Cheltenham Races
March, 29 : Visit to Leeds

April, 03: Grand National Horse Races

May, 02 : Polo Match
May, 15 : Polo Match
May, 22 : Polo Match
May, 30 : Polo Match

June, 04 : Polo Match
June, 06 : Polo Match
June, 12 : Trooping the Colour
June, 13 : Polo Match
June, 15 : Polo Match
June, 21 : Birth of Prince William
June, 22 : Leaving the hospital with William

August, 04 : Christening of Prince William

September, 04 : Braemar Games

November, 18 : Banquet for statevisit of Queen Beatrix and Prince Claus of the Netherlands

December, 08 : Visit to the opera


So not much at all. Especially, since I doubt most of those polo matches actually counted in an official capacity. Meghan is not a future Queen so she'll have even less expectations. If she spends the first few years of her marriage focused on starting a family, with the occasional royal duty, then she'll be falling in line with those before her.

 

[Abbigail]

I agree. I can't think of a large London royal wedding that has happened in June. At least not amongst the descendants of George V and Mary.

I suppose next year could be an exception as Trooping is happening relatively early in the month, June 9th. If they got married June 30th, 3 weeks later, it might be feasible, but even then I'm dubious.

We will see. I honestly hesitate to rule anything out, especially given the couple we're talking about. Fortunately, I do think the picture will be clearer come January, at the latest.

Is she going to learn everything in matter of months? No. Should all the important stuff before covered though? Yes.

Nothing is going to be put in motion until they are officially engaged. And I just don't buy that they are already officially engaged. Hence, I think there'll be longer time in between when they actually get engaged to an announcement. And like someone has already said, it's unlikely the actually planning would be starting until after an official announcement to prevent leaking.

Eh. I can believe they are engaged. But even if they aren't, I doubt they aren't already planning out the necessary steps and preparing Meghan for what she has to do and expect in making the move to London. That's what I mean by putting things in motion. Fear of leaking won't stop planning, especially for someone who has to make a move from one country to another.

I agree that all the important stuff should be covered and I see no reason why she wouldn't be able to balance that with her transition to London.

 

[wyevale]

There is NO need for her to learn/know Constitutional stuff [since she is never going to be other than a peripheral figure] ,unlike Catherine. Obviously she needs to know the boundaries of what she may, and may not say and do, precedence, SOME history and details of British mores and manners.
Six months of guidance from Prince Harry and whichever Courtier assigned to the task should be sufficient.

 

[Pranter]

There has been plenty comments from posters that said they believe they are officially engaged and thus paperwork have started. Then using that as a basis that the announcement can be made soon after Suits is done. My point is that nothing would be put in motion in terms of her citizenship until they are engaged regardless of what their understanding regarding the direction of relationship.

I just don't recall seeing anyone say they are officially engaged. Just because they have started the paperwork doesn't mean he's gone down on the knee yet. Much like Kate and William..they had discussed it and knew they were going to marry. She just didn't know exactly when he was proposing.

Personally I think they have an agreement they are going to marry. I expect an official announcement anytime from Dec thru Feb.

That's how I view it.


LaRae