Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings

[Denville]

Nothing elitist about that...how dare the peasant speak without permission!!!


LaRae

No but what the RF say is to do with their public role. little jokes abuot their children or Dad, is a recongnsed way of being informal. Meghn is not royal, she's not in that job yet, so why not confine herself to talking about her career as actress and philanthropist? Why not say that she's not going to talk about her private relationships? Harry should have done the same
She has liberty to speak, but if she does speak in public about Harry, she's got to face the fact that she will attract both gushy adoration AND criticism.

 

[Queen E]

I am a fan of the couple but I can readily admit that some of the pitfalls from this VF interview could have been avoided if it were handled better PR wise. All public figures after all depend on good PR & the royals are no exception.

If the aim was to counter the criticisms that Meghan has been unfairly getting, Harry should have been the first one to come forward & talk about his love/admiration for Meghan, which would have softened the landing for her to then give this VF interview. For months the couple have refused to talk about their relationship, but to have Meghan be the one to break the silence I think was the wrong choice PR wise. As it now stands the accusations about Meghan being indiscreet, pushy etc, is now only getting louder.

 

[Osipi]

They wont be equal partners. She will be his support act, just as Kate is for William and Camilla is for Charles.. and Philip is for the queen.

Perhaps I should clarify my remark. They will be equal partners in their private relationship. If a wife is a doctor and the husband is a technician in the radiology department, that separates them in their professional lives as would the "job" within the BRF define Harry and Meghan.

@wyevale: As far as the VF interview intended to introduce Meghan to the British public, I think that kind of narrows things too much. I would say it was meant to introduce Meghan to the global public. Like it or not, along with being a prince of the UK, Harry is also a figure on the world stage and is known around the world. This relationship isn't exclusive to the UK.

 

[Abbigail]

No but what the RF say is to do with their public role. little jokes abuot their children or Dad, is a recongnsed way of being informal. Meghn is not royal, she's not in that job yet, so why not confine herself to talking about her career as actress and philanthropist? Why not say that she's not going to talk about her private relationships? Harry should have done the same
She has liberty to speak, but if she does speak in public about Harry, she's got to face the fact that she will attract both gushy adoration AND criticism.

I'm pretty sure she is aware of this and in fact, wouldn't have spoken at all if she were so concerned about criticism.

And why shouldn't she speak about her own relationship, a relationship that affects nearly every aspect of her life?? The idea that royal girlfriends should keep their mouths shut is...well, lets just say this is one "royal rule" I'm glad to see broken.

 

[Pranter]

IF her piece in VF was mean't to 'introduce her' to the British Public, why was a publication the virtually no-one reads here chosen?

'Tatler', British Vogue or 'Elle' would make more sense, as Women actually read them here

Since several members of the BRF have done pieces with this same magazine...surely it can't be that unknown to the Brits?


LaRae

No but what the RF say is to do with their public role. little jokes abuot their children or Dad, is a recongnsed way of being informal. Meghn is not royal, she's not in that job yet, so why not confine herself to talking about her career as actress and philanthropist? Why not say that she's not going to talk about her private relationships? Harry should have done the same
She has liberty to speak, but if she does speak in public about Harry, she's got to face the fact that she will attract both gushy adoration AND criticism.

If there was a legitimate reason for the criticism then I would agree (I myself have criticized her early on).

However this antiquated idea that she shouldn't speak unless Harry has first or not at all is beyond me. I'm hardly a feminist however this is not 1950 and the BRF jumped the shark about being proper and following the rules a long long time ago. People can forget pretending this family is some sort of moral bastion that we common folks are supposed to look up to for how to behave or what to do.



LaRae

 

[wyevale]

https://www.statista.com/statistics/381013/vanity-fair-monthly-reach-by-demographic-uk/

'Minority' to say the least...

 

[Pranter]

https://www.statista.com/statistics/381013/vanity-fair-monthly-reach-by-demographic-uk/

I refer you back to the Queen, William, Kate etc who all thought the magazine worthy enough to appear in it.


LaRae

 

[Osipi]

https://www.statista.com/statistics/381013/vanity-fair-monthly-reach-by-demographic-uk/

That takes care of the UK. What about the rest of the global population?

 

[jacqui24]

IF her piece in VF was mean't to 'introduce her' to the British Public, why was a publication the virtually no-one reads here chosen?

'Tatler', British Vogue or 'Elle' would make more sense, as Women actually read them here

I don't know if it's to introduce her to the British public rather than public in general. I believe the Duchess of Cornwall has been featured in VF as well as the Queen last year. People read online these days, the word will get back. However, American and Canadian public will the more friendly scene as she is not an official member of the BRF yet.

Also, I do want to point out one interesting thing. I remember Lainey wrote an analysis piece back when the November statement is released. She did mention that the if British press continue their nonsense, Harry might chose to let something out through US media. Apparently that was a page out his brother's old playbook? Not sure if that's actually true since I don't pay that much attention to the Cambridges. But this did remind me of that.

https://www.statista.com/statistics/381013/vanity-fair-monthly-reach-by-demographic-uk/

'Minority' to say the least...

I don't think that's a fair assessment as the internet dominates these things today. How many people actually buys magazines anymore? I think more of actually magazine readership comes from subscription. Clearly, it reached the British public even if it's Vanity Fair. Just look at the overreaction and the actual magazine only hits the stands TODAY.

It's okay for everyone to agree to disagree with each other. I'm glad the thread was cleaned up and it should stay clean.

We are in 2017 and about to embark on 2018, Gods will. The idea of the woman shouldn't speak before the man; just too old school for today.

I think a lot of this is down to outsiders feeling they know exactly how all royal relationships should be run. When Harry made his statement back in November, the media and folks online came down on him as well. In fact, some people felt like Harry was badly advised by his Palace team, and it was all done without the royal family input.

The Duke of Cambridge's backing was publicly stated afterwards.

These are mature adults in a mature relationship. They know what they're doing.

I read something in one of the UK papers yesterday that said while some were appalled by Harry's disclosure of his own struggles and seeking help, 80% of those under 35 had no problem with his disclosure. So that's an interest number. I get that the BRF has their ways, but times are changing, and if the situation warrants it, they've made changes in the past as well. What Kate did worked for her, but Meghan should do what she feels is best for her situation.

 

[wyevale]

The reality is, the opinion formed on Ms Markle [in the UK] will be created by 'The Fail', 'The Sun', 'The Mirror' and other newspapers..
'Puff pieces' in 'Glossies' [either online, or in print], will have practically no impact.

 

[jacqui24]

I am a fan of the couple but I can readily admit that some of the pitfalls from this VF interview could have been avoided if it were handled better PR wise. All public figures after all depend on good PR & the royals are no exception.

If the aim was to counter the criticisms that Meghan has been unfairly getting, Harry should have been the first one to come forward & talk about his love/admiration for Meghan, which would have softened the landing for her to then give this VF interview. For months the couple have refused to talk about their relationship, but to have Meghan be the one to break the silence I think was the wrong choice PR wise. As it now stands the accusations about Meghan being indiscreet, pushy etc, is now only getting louder.

See that's just it. I don't think that was the primary purpose. The purpose was to introduce her as her own person and who she is. Aside from the attention grabber headline, the article did show a lot about just Meghan. It's just the public choose to focus on the relationship, which is expected. Nevertheless, they got her out there. And those accusations were out there in the first place, and they aren't going away even if she didn't do this. This actually gives her more freedom. It was kind of silly how she has had to avoid the giant elephant in the room that was obvious to everyone.

I'm glad she didn't go to the gutter and fight all the rumors and things that's been said about her. It just present her as a person.

The reality is, the opinion formed on Ms Markle [in the UK] will be created by 'The Fail', 'The Sun', 'The Mirror' and other newspapers..
'Puff pieces' in 'Glossies' [either online, or in print], will have practically no impact.

So would it have been better if she gave the interview to those you stated? Of course those daily papers can print whatever they want, but at least anyone who is interested can easily have access to the article as well.

 

[Osipi]

I think most intelligent people see the Fail and other publications like them for what they are. Hunters of the proverbial cash cows. (chants MOO). The opinions that spawn from these publications are to the people they write about like no-see-ums at a picnic. They're annoying but don't disrupt the general enjoyment of the picnic.

Although these types of publications are rampant throughout the world, it seems that the UK has more than their share of them. Then again, we live in an age where even the most reputable of news reporting can been prone to be called "fake news". Go figure.

 

[Pranter]

They wont be equal partners. She will be his support act, just as Kate is for William and Camilla is for Charles.. and Philip is for the queen.

How does that mean they aren't equal partners? As far as the job goes we see all those couples supporting each other. I've even seen Camilla and Kate walking (gasp) NEXT TO their spouse at an official event!


LaRae

 

[Sister Morphine]

They wont be equal partners. She will be his support act, just as Kate is for William and Camilla is for Charles.. and Philip is for the queen.

You can provide support AND be equal to your partner. My mother supports and helps my father, but she is by no means unequal to him. Granted, my parents aren't royals, but that doesn't matter. Each person helps, supports, and loves the other. Harry and Meghan may not be equal in status right now, but even then they are equal as human beings. I don't think Harry wants a wife who will walk 10 steps behind him and constantly defer to him about everything.

 

[Cocoasneeze]

The reality is, the opinion formed on Ms Markle [in the UK] will be created by 'The Fail', 'The Sun', 'The Mirror' and other newspapers..
'Puff pieces' in 'Glossies' [either online, or in print], will have practically no impact.

The few hundred or thousand comments DF articles get hardly represent the views of wider audience. DF are know for their hateful, factually incorrect articles, and often get called out on it. Tabloids are the gutter fudder, the people who form their opinions based on them already had a negative viewpoint, and were never going to change it.

 

[duchessrachel]

Cepe - I ageee, but give it time. Either they'll break up and this thread'll fade to obscurity, or they'll marry and most of the people who hate the relationship'll jump on board (if it can happen for Sofia of Sweden, it can happen for Meghan), and we can resume our regularly scheduled bickering about Diana/Charles/Camilla.

 

[AlowVera]

The few hundred or thousand comments DF articles get hardly represent the views of wider audience. DF are know for their hateful, factually incorrect articles, and often get called out on it. Tabloids are the gutter fudder, the people who form their opinions based on them already had a negative viewpoint, and were never going to change it.

I do think the British press is mainly upset because they feel slighted that American Press gets the scoop. I do think that MM and PH will have to throw them a bone and they need to tread carefully because they will twist their words and create negative headlines. The royal correspondents are not the worst its their editors who set the tone.

The issue with Daily Fail is that they attract an audience that is rarely kind regarding Americans in the first place. They will take benign facts and turn them into clickbait hence the Straight Outta Compton hit piece...of course they hide their disdain with code words but the message is clear and judging from the comments of that piece it hit its intended audience.

 

[jacqui24]

I do think the British press is mainly upset because they feel slighted that American Press gets the scoop. I do think that MM and PH will have to throw them a bone and they need to tread carefully because they will twist their words and create negative headlines. The royal correspondents are not the worst its their editors who set the tone.

The issue with Daily Fail is that they attract an audience that is rarely kind regarding Americans in the first place. They will take benign facts and turn them into clickbait hence the Straight Outta Compton hit piece...of course they hide their disdain with code words but the message is clear and judging from the comments of that piece it hit its intended audience.

At some point, they are going to throw them a bone. I think they'd prefer that bone to be a joint interview moreso than just MM? It's a fine line to walk with rewarding and punishing. I do the outside consultants at my job. It's an interesting relationship. I highly doubt they'll completely alienate them, but it's a warning. I think they can all take a cue from Camilla Tominey.

 

[AlowVera]

I'd just prefer them to keep schtum UNTIL they announce their engagement...

In the age of Social media there is a failure to draw a line between the Public and the [deeply] Personal.

I think they should keep quiet and let the pictures do the talking, perhaps go to some horse show with Zara and Mike and the kids. Be seen walking on a beach, go to a local pub. Be seen but not heard until the engagement.

 

[jacqui24]

I think they should keep quiet and let the pictures do the talking, perhaps go to some horse show with Zara and Mike and the kids. Be seen walking on a beach, go to a local pub. Be seen but not heard until the engagement.

I think it'd be easier on all of us if they kept quiet. Just look at the last few days.

But if they want to say something, I'd be happy to listen as well.

 

[AlowVera]

At some point, they are going to throw them a bone. I think they'd prefer that bone to be a joint interview moreso than just MM? It's a fine line to walk with rewarding and punishing. I do the outside consultants at my job. It's an interesting relationship. I highly doubt they'll completely alienate them, but it's a warning. I think they can all take a cue from Camilla Tominey.

Yes it is a love hate relationship and they both need each other so they are in the same boat. Throw them a bone once in a while just to keep them busy until the official engagement. I do think that celebs like Beyonce who retain their privacy yet use social media to release pictures is a good model.

 

[O-H Anglophile]

This interview was clearly a joint decision by H&M. My point is that she is the one getting all the criticism & he needs to speak up so it doesn't appear one-sided.

I think their actions over the next few months will speak louder than words. This is clearly a step in a process.
It is very sexist to say Meghan is not allowed to speak for the both of them as a couple.

 

[Cocoasneeze]

The thing is, that DM and other tabloids have tried to set the tone and tell the story for Meghan from the start. She has her own voice, she told a bit of her own story herself, and IMHO it was the right approach for her (and Harry). She set it down how and when they met. She set down, that they're a serious relationship and will soon come together to the public.
The British media have been a bit bitter from the start, because they got called out for the tone they did set re Meghan. Emily Andrews has got the exclusive pics, but that's not enough, she's still whining on twitter. The Sun has got the scoop often, but that's not enough. Harry and Meghan will soon give a bone to the British tabloids, but DM will be left hanging as long as they follow meghan's mother around to laundromat.

 

[O-H Anglophile]

They wont be equal partners. She will be his support act, just as Kate is for William and Camilla is for Charles.. and Philip is for the queen.

Maybe in their public roles, but (only from observation) I think William and Kate are equal partners at home. They are a team and support each other.
I think Meghan and Harry are developing or have developed their own team.

 

[jacqui24]

The thing is, that DM and other tabloids have tried to set the tone and tell the story for Meghan from the start. She has her own voice, she told a bit of her own story herself, and IMHO it was the right approach for her (and Harry). She set it down how and when they met. She set down, that they're a serious relationship and will soon come together to the public.
The British media have been a bit bitter from the start, because they got called out for the tone they did set re Meghan. Emily Andrews has got the exclusive pics, but that's not enough, she's still whining on twitter. The Sun has got the scoop often, but that's not enough. Harry and Meghan will soon give a bone to the British tabloids, but DM will be left hanging as long as they follow meghan's mother around to laundromat.

Emily's sour grapes about Harry's November letter is just so strong still. Part of it is because she and her paper participated in a number of headlines that were either purposefully misleading or complete untrue. She actually called the break in at Meghan's house as a "perception" problem. I enjoy their exclusive pics, but that made me a bit nauseous.

 

[O-H Anglophile]

Yes it is a love hate relationship and they both need each other so they are in the same boat. Throw them a bone once in a while just to keep them busy until the official engagement. I do think that celebs like Beyonce who retain their privacy yet use social media to release pictures is a good model.

But when KP releases photos the UK press whines about all of them mot being able to send their own photographer to take their own pictures.

 

[Osipi]

It really isn't surprising that over time, with less and less credibility being given to the British tabloid press that if there's something that anyone, be it the royal family, well known personages and such, will gravitate to get their information out in other ways than including the tabloids. The Cambridges are beginning to release their own photos taken by Kate through their social media. To me, its a process of totally eliminating those publications which looks for cash cows rather than present legitimate reporting. Some very good royal reporters are caught in this fishnet but they remain working for who they work for. Their choice.

Its a case of the tabloids being less than reputable by what they report and now having to live with the consequences. If a friend is known to be one that twists and exaggerates things you tell them, they're the last people on earth you trust to tell things to and relegate them to the ancient history folder.

Its not a good feeling to be made to feel obsolete and that is what is happening to tabloids but the reality of it all is that they don't do anything to change it.

 

[Queen E]

I never once said that Meghan should be stifled. If she had been speaking to VF about her charities, social issues or her work, I would have loved that & rejoiced! That would have gone a long way in presenting her as a modern woman & someone of substance who isn’t defined by her relationship. But let us not pretend that this VF interview does that. I would argue that it does the opposite.

Talking about being in love when you have yet to be properly introduced to the public was not a wise choice & slightly jumping the gun. There were better ways that Meghan could have been presented to the public. What has this interview really accomplished & how does it define Meghan as a person? If the most groundbreaking piece of her rollout interview is a declaration that they're in love, how does this make Meghan look any different from the other celebrities out there? She or KP could have at least insisted that a large chunk of the VF interview would be about her charity work instead there wasn't any mention of this.

As a fan of Meghan’s I think the VF interview was somewhat of an own goal, missed opportunity & doesn’t do her any favors.

 

[Pranter]

It really isn't surprising that over time, with less and less credibility being given to the British tabloid press that if there's something that anyone, be it the royal family, well known personages and such, will gravitate to get their information out in other ways than including the tabloids. The Cambridges are beginning to release their own photos taken by Kate through their social media. To me, its a process of totally eliminating those publications which looks for cash cows rather than present legitimate reporting. Some very good royal reporters are caught in this fishnet but they remain working for who they work for. Their choice.

Its a case of the tabloids being less than reputable by what they report and now having to live with the consequences. If a friend is known to be one that twists and exaggerates things you tell them, they're the last people on earth you trust to tell things to and relegate them to the ancient history folder.

Its not a good feeling to be made to feel obsolete and that is what is happening to tabloids but the reality of it all is that they don't do anything to change it.

Exactly..well said. I think it a brilliant move by the Cambridges to release photos. When they are doing the media (Kate and the mental health piece or an article in VF with all her pics) they are being very smart about who they work with. The fact that Meghan picked VF, IMO, is another indicator the palace et al knew about this and okay'd it.

The tabloids have cooked the goose that laid the golden eggs. I would be happy to see them all go bankrupt.


LaRae

 

[Cocoasneeze]

It really isn't surprising that over time, with less and less credibility being given to the British tabloid press that if there's something that anyone, be it the royal family, well known personages and such, will gravitate to get their information out in other ways than including the tabloids. The Cambridges are beginning to release their own photos taken by Kate through their social media. To me, its a process of totally eliminating those publications which looks for cash cows rather than present legitimate reporting. Some very good royal reporters are caught in this fishnet but they remain working for who they work for. Their choice.

Its a case of the tabloids being less than reputable by what they report and now having to live with the consequences. If a friend is known to be one that twists and exaggerates things you tell them, they're the last people on earth you trust to tell things to and relegate them to the ancient history folder.

Its not a good feeling to be made to feel obsolete and that is what is happening to tabloids but the reality of it all is that they don't do anything to change it.

Very well said. The way these same tabloids now whining have been reporting about Meghan, it should come as no surprise she and Harry chose another publication for this interview.