A Potential Wife for Prince Harry

[Anna Catherine]

Thanks for filling me in. Honestly, I'd be surprised if Harry has a girlfriend or gets a girlfriend anytime soon. So anyone will surprise me. However, I do so love a good surprise!

[AfricanAUSSIE]

Originally Posted by AdmirerUS

I think Harry, if anyone, understands the Mike and Zara union. There are many layers there. I do hope Harry will hold off until he finds a friend, as well as a lover, to marry. I hope that his mom taught him that. Or, maybe his dad did!

Interesting you mention this (bold text). Considering his mother had to deal with her husbands infidelity, one would think Henry would be more respectful and caring towards woman. He would have suffered first hand the effects of the Camilla/Charles thing. Yet he let his one true love down many times and appears to continue to treat himself and women with little respect.

I think Henry did find a friend and lover...to marry, but his lack of maturity and ability to learn from mistakes (his or others) got in the way.

I think Chelsy may have negotiated the fishbowl effect had Henry been more "grown up".

[julliette]

Originally Posted by AfricanAUSSIE

I think Henry did find a friend and lover...to marry, but his lack of maturity and ability to learn from mistakes (his or others) got in the way.

I think Chelsy may have negotiated the fishbowl effect had Henry been more "grown up".

I agree with the last part, though obviously this is all speculation from our part

Harry's main problem seems to be what you mentioned: lack of ability to learn from mistakes. That's why he is so immature, IMO

[Grandma828]

War experience will mature a person. Maybe we should wait and see. Personally, I don"t think we will know anything about 'the real one' until the relationship is well along. It won't be public.

[Roslyn]

Originally Posted by AfricanAUSSIE

Interesting you mention this (bold text). Considering his mother had to deal with her husbands infidelity, one would think Henry would be more respectful and caring towards woman. He would have suffered first hand the effects of the Camilla/Charles thing. Yet he let his one true love down many times and appears to continue to treat himself and women with little respect.

I think Henry did find a friend and lover...to marry, but his lack of maturity and ability to learn from mistakes (his or others) got in the way.

I think Chelsy may have negotiated the fishbowl effect had Henry been more "grown up".

Harry also had to deal with his mother's infidelity with James Hewitt, at least, and we don't know what effect that had. It could be Hewitt was the cause of the army career, though this is, of course, only speculation.

I happen to take the view that both Diana and Charles were faithful till their marriage had irretrievably broken down. After that they both were unfaithful to their spouses and I reckon that's just fine. I think once that stage was reached they were both then free to find happiness elsewhere.

Harry did grow up during a very volatile period in his parents' lives though, and probably saw and heard some things that might have had an effect on his ability to keep a relationship working. We can only speculate about the advice his parents might have given him and William about seeking suitable partners to marry. If Diana did give her sons the advice to hold off till they found a friend as well as a lover to marry, she had clearly learnt from her own mistake of hastily entering into marriage with an incompatible stranger. The advice actually sounds to me like something he would more likely have received from his father.

I think it's a shame it didn't work out with Chelsy. Perhaps they'll get together again in a few years when he's grown up a bit.

[NGalitzine]

Originally Posted by AdmirerUS

I think Harry, if anyone, understands the Mike and Zara union. There are many layers there. I do hope Harry will hold off until he finds a friend, as well as a lover, to marry. I hope that his mom taught him that. Or, maybe his dad did!

I hope to God neither child ever took relationship advice from their mother.

[Anna Catherine]

Honestly while I think Chelsy was nice, I think it's just something that didn't work out regardless they both grew up and were young and immature when they met. Regardless of whether he was a royal or not, I don't know if it would have worked out anyway. I always believe people break up for a reason and don't think their reason was just because of him being a royal. She probably just wasn't the one. There are more fish in the sea besides Chelsy; someone better suited for Harry.

[AfricanAUSSIE]

Originally Posted by julliette

I agree with the last part, though obviously this is all speculation from our part

Harry's main problem seems to be what you mentioned: lack of ability to learn from mistakes. That's why he is so immature, IMO

Ola Juliette de Lisboa. Any Portuguese prospects for Henry?

[Elenath]

Originally Posted by AfricanAUSSIE

I think Henry did find a friend and lover...to marry, but his lack of maturity and ability to learn from mistakes (his or others) got in the way.

That is a big thing to say about someone you don't know... Most men I know have several relationships before they meet "the one". Harry was in his early twenties dating someone several years younger. To me, the fact that they did not marry, doesn't mean much. They both will at some point.

I also wonder why people all of a sudden say Harry is immature.. Is it the Las Vegas thing?? The falling out off clubs he used to do (which I haven't seen in a while)? The interview in Afghanistan? To me he has done a lot of growing up in the past several years so I wonder what the difference is between him and most other men of his age.

[AfricanAUSSIE]

Originally Posted by Elenath

That is a big thing to say about someone you don't know... Most men I know have several relationships before they meet "the one". Harry was in his early twenties dating someone several years younger. To me, the fact that they did not marry, doesn't mean much. They both will at some point.

I also wonder why people all of a sudden say Harry is immature.. Is it the Las Vegas thing?? The falling out off clubs he used to do (which I haven't seen in a while)? The interview in Afghanistan? To me he has done a lot of growing up in the past several years so I wonder what the difference is between him and most other men of his age.

Elenath, it is a big thing to say but to answer your questions, my perception of his immaturity comes from all of the things he has done that have earned him backlashes, especially of late. He is nearly 30 and although full of potential he continues to make the same mistakes. Vegas and Interview are the latest 2.

The comments I make (or you make) are not from personally knowing him, of course, but from what I have heard HIM say and from images of HIM that I have seen.

He has been a celebrity from birth, he is surrounded by a powerful PR machine and whatever other costly help you can imagine, and yet he shows little advancement in mastering the marketing or damage control of himself, why? I for one don't believe he is unintelligent. So why? Judging by the interview and Vegas, I would say he is immature, even spoilt.

My thoughts on his relationship came from a comparison of her life (uni and job) and how it has progressed versus his. She is maturing, he is not (same old, same old). I also noticed she finally left the relationship after she attended the wedding. More maturity on her side. Throughout their relationship I viewed many images of Henry flirting with young woman, and from that I also though...not encouraging for someone to compromise on the fishbowl effect if there is also that on the table. His intense pursuit of her throughout the relationship (by the way, something we did not publicly witness with Will and Kate) tells me that she was more than special. And don't forget the phone tapping that gave us intimate information we should not have had.

Naturally there is a lot more I could add...not enough time or space, but rest assured that I (and others who call him immature I am sure) do wish him the best. He is, to me and by far, the most interesting Royal in England.

[julliette]

^^great post, AfricanAUSSIE, I wouldn't have said better

Originally Posted by AfricanAUSSIE

Ola Juliette de Lisboa. Any Portuguese prospects for Henry?

Well, good question! I've never thought about that before, how can it be?
But now that you raised the question I'll try to search for some ladies, who knows if Harry is reading this thread and may like one of the girls

It would be a good match, english and portuguese have many ties, old allies, many english living and holidaying in Portugal, English upper classes love port, etc etc

[AfricanAUSSIE]

Muito obrigado Julliette. When you find the girl or girls, don't forget to add photos. Henry and I would love to see what they look like.

Your English is good.

[GracieGiraffe]

Originally Posted by AdmirerUS

I think Harry, if anyone, understands the Mike and Zara union. There are many layers there. I do hope Harry will hold off until he finds a friend, as well as a lover, to marry. I hope that his mom taught him that. Or, maybe his dad did!

The Mike and Zara union.. many layers???? I suppose this is the wrong thread, but I'm intrigued.

As for Harry, I think anyone who has his best interests at heart wants him to find a friend as well as lover. It's what we all want.

Who can say where he learned that from - I think his mother wanted a great love, but never found one. Not sure about Hasnat Khan - I think that the fact that they broke up just prior to her death, and her time on earth was arrested, lends itself to the image that he was her great love. Had Diana lived to old age like the rest of us, the notion that this was her great love might not have born out.

Not all of us find great loves and even when we do not all of us are able to marry those great loves - to say that this part of life is complicated is an understatement.

As for Charles, yes, Camilla is his great love. And yes, it caused a great deal of chaos for a lot of people. I'm sure Harry has learned a lesson through that relationship, but unlike Charles, I don't think there's any pressure, let alone enormous pressure to marry. Which is a good thing, as we certainly don't want a repeat of that whole mess.

[Elenath]

Originally Posted by AfricanAUSSIE

Elenath, it is a big thing to say but to answer your questions, my perception of his immaturity comes from all of the things he has done that have earned him backlashes, especially of late. He is nearly 30 and although full of potential he continues to make the same mistakes. Vegas and Interview are the latest 2.

The comments I make (or you make) are not from personally knowing him, of course, but from what I have heard HIM say and from images of HIM that I have seen.

He has been a celebrity from birth, he is surrounded by a powerful PR machine and whatever other costly help you can imagine, and yet he shows little advancement in mastering the marketing or damage control of himself, why? I for one don't believe he is unintelligent. So why? Judging by the interview and Vegas, I would say he is immature, even spoilt.

My thoughts on his relationship came from a comparison of her life (uni and job) and how it has progressed versus his. She is maturing, he is not (same old, same old). I also noticed she finally left the relationship after she attended the wedding. More maturity on her side. Throughout their relationship I viewed many images of Henry flirting with young woman, and from that I also though...not encouraging for someone to compromise on the fishbowl effect if there is also that on the table. His intense pursuit of her throughout the relationship (by the way, something we did not publicly witness with Will and Kate) tells me that she was more than special. And don't forget the phone tapping that gave us intimate information we should not have had.

Naturally there is a lot more I could add...not enough time or space, but rest assured that I (and others who call him immature I am sure) do wish him the best. He is, to me and by far, the most interesting Royal in England.

Then I'm afraid we have different glasses on while seeing the same thing (and no mine are not pink ) To me he seems like someone who doesn't really care what other people think of him while he, at the same time, finds it extremely irritating he can never seem to get it right. To me this was especially apparent in the interview. I wouldn't want to live in that fishbowl. You can be the most responsible person alive, but when you do one thing "wrong" everything that has happened in the past 10 years is dragged out and put under the microscope once more.
I'm 38 years old now and I can honestly say I have done things even in my early/mid twenties that would make me cringe now. I was supposed to be mature and responsible back then... I wouldn't want to be reminded of these things every other week now (or so).

No matter what the DM and it's readers might say, Harry could have died in Afghanistan. I can't blame him for letting off steam in Las Vegas. I can also imagine his protection officers don't have the authority to take away peoples mobile phones. So.. while trusting complete strangers might have been naive it's hardly the end of society and no reason to call someone immature, irresponsible and spoilt.

Funny thing is, I always thought William was the more spoilt one..

[EIIR]

So not only are we assessing the mental health of Prince Harry, about whose inner thoughts and feelings we know almost nothing, but we're now apparently making judgements on Chelsy's mental capacity, about which we know even less.

My feeling on Chelsy is that she'll move back to South Africa at some point. Her legal training in the UK will enable her to get work in SA in the same field, given the commonalities in the two systems. I think that, along with her reluctance to become a public figure, doomed her relationship with Harry.

Listening to people attack Harry for his immaturity, I must admit, makes me pretty uncomfortable. I'm about 6 months younger than he is and I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. Unlike Harry, I have no idea what I want to do career-wise. He's found a job that he loves and finds rewarding, and which he is also exceptionally good at. I've had different jobs but that's only taught me what I don't want to do. I'm ambivalent on marriage and children. I'm nowhere near getting married as I've not yet found someone I could bear attaching myself to.

According to some people here, all this means I'm evidently emotionally stunted in some way and unable to grow up. That's pretty depressing.

[blauerengel]

Oh,I fully understand your feelings of anger when people remark Prince Harry´s immaturity.In my view he has improved a lot over the last few years,he has decided that he wants to do military service and finished his helicopter training with good results.
I also share your views about Chelsy-she is very sensible because she knows the restrictions and nasty side of being a public figure and decided that she doesn´t want to change her way of living for her boyfriend.
Everybody is constantly picking on Catherine because she has not had a significant payed job or career-and here´s a goal-oriented young lady who decides that career and her own happiness are more important than marriage or glamourlife as a princess and she gets criticism as well...no matter what you do you will always find someone who will disagree!

[GracieGiraffe]

Originally Posted by Elenath

Then I'm afraid we have different glasses on while seeing the same thing (and no mine are not pink ) To me he seems like someone who doesn't really care what other people think of him while he, at the same time, finds it extremely irritating he can never seem to get it right. To me this was especially apparent in the interview. I wouldn't want to live in that fishbowl. You can be the most responsible person alive, but when you do one thing "wrong" everything that has happened in the past 10 years is dragged out and put under the microscope once more.

Given the fact that his family's position depends in great part upon their image, I would hope he very much cares about what others think of him.

[julliette]

Originally Posted by EIIR

So not only are we assessing the mental health of Prince Harry, about whose inner thoughts and feelings we know almost nothing, but we're now apparently making judgements on Chelsy's mental capacity, about which we know even less.

My feeling on Chelsy is that she'll move back to South Africa at some point. Her legal training in the UK will enable her to get work in SA in the same field, given the commonalities in the two systems. I think that, along with her reluctance to become a public figure, doomed her relationship with Harry.

I hope that you didn't use the first paragraph as a critique to anyone since what you did in the 2nd one was exactly the thing you're criticising

You know, we're all here trying to enter their minds and get to know what they think. Some of us at least wouldn't mind to have that power. BUT of course none of us really knows what goes on in their lives, let alone their minds; we're just here sitting behind a computer and gossiping a bit and getting conclusions from the small pieces of information we're giving about them and I think it doesn't hurt anyone as long as everyone has in mind that we know nothing for sure at the end of the day. The secret is Don't take it so serious

Originally Posted by EIIR

Listening to people attack Harry for his immaturity, I must admit, makes me pretty uncomfortable. I'm about 6 months younger than he is and I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. Unlike Harry, I have no idea what I want to do career-wise. He's found a job that he loves and finds rewarding, and which he is also exceptionally good at. I've had different jobs but that's only taught me what I don't want to do. I'm ambivalent on marriage and children. I'm nowhere near getting married as I've not yet found someone I could bear attaching myself to.

According to some people here, all this means I'm evidently emotionally stunted in some way and unable to grow up. That's pretty depressing.

No, it doesn't. I think you misunderstood what is being criticised about Harry. No one said he's immature for not having an idea of what he wants to do career-wise. In fact, as you said, he made a choice, so it would be full to criticise something that doesn't exist.
No one said he's immature because he's not about to tie the knot yet.
People (including me) think he's immature because of his actions and reactions to the consequences of his actions.
Nothing to do with his career or the fact that he hasn't find THE girl yet.
So no one is going to conclude that you're immature because you have no idea of what to do with you're life. You're in a process of searching, analysing the options, excluding the ones you don't like and trying to find the way you want to pave. There's nothing immature about it, but the opposite: to this process is called growing up, and if you're able to analyze the possibilities and exclude some, it shows you're quite mature

Originally Posted by blauerengel

Oh,I fully understand your feelings of anger when people remark Prince Harry´s immaturity.In my view he has improved a lot over the last few years,he has decided that he wants to do military service and finished his helicopter training with good results. !

I think he has improved a lot over the last few years, too. And after 4 months in Afghanistan, he's probably more mature now as well.
But he still as a long way to pave for me to say that he's a mature guy

Originally Posted by blauerengel

I also share your views about Chelsy-she is very sensible because she knows the restrictions and nasty side of being a public figure and decided that she doesn´t want to change her way of living for her boyfriend.
Everybody is constantly picking on Catherine because she has not had a significant payed job or career-and here´s a goal-oriented young lady who decides that career and her own happiness are more important than marriage or glamourlife as a princess and she gets criticism as well...no matter what you do you will always find someone who will disagree!

I think the people who usually criticise Kate for those reasons you stated (and that includes me) are not the same who criticise Chelsy for having followed her way without Harry.
People may think it's sad they're not together anymore but that's not a critique to her, it's just lamenting something we wished was different

[AfricanAUSSIE]

Wow, mental health? Immaturity is what, lack of good mental health? Does that mean if one is immature one is mentally unstable?

I am a little immature by my standards but I hope I am not mentally unstable. Should I see a medico? But I am responsible and I do learn from my mistakes (for the most part)...Mmm.

[cepe]

Originally Posted by EIIR

So not only are we assessing the mental health of Prince Harry, about whose inner thoughts and feelings we know almost nothing, but we're now apparently making judgements on Chelsy's mental capacity, about which we know even less.

My feeling on Chelsy is that she'll move back to South Africa at some point. Her legal training in the UK will enable her to get work in SA in the same field, given the commonalities in the two systems. I think that, along with her reluctance to become a public figure, doomed her relationship with Harry.

Listening to people attack Harry for his immaturity, I must admit, makes me pretty uncomfortable. I'm about 6 months younger than he is and I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. Unlike Harry, I have no idea what I want to do career-wise. He's found a job that he loves and finds rewarding, and which he is also exceptionally good at. I've had different jobs but that's only taught me what I don't want to do. I'm ambivalent on marriage and children. I'm nowhere near getting married as I've not yet found someone I could bear attaching myself to.

According to some people here, all this means I'm evidently emotionally stunted in some way and unable to grow up. That's pretty depressing.

Some common sense - at last. I get peeved with amateur psychologists laying out Harry's problems. He's young, he was in combat mode, the interviews should never have happened, he spoke as army people speak.
IT's been chewed over for nearly 2 weeks and has made no progress.

My candidates are:

Lady Mary Luise Wellesley (b. 16 December 1986).
Lady Charlotte Anne Wellesley (b. 8 October 1990)

These are daughters of the Marquis of Douro, heir to the Duke of Wellington. Thier aunt Jane (Lady Jane Wellesley) was once put forward as a potential wife of Prince Charles.

I know mothing about them apart from the fact that Charlotte atteneded Oxford University.