The Royal Forums Coat of Arms


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
 
  #41  
Old 10-10-2018, 09:50 AM
Duke of Marmalade's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
TRF Author
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Frankfurt am Main, Germany
Posts: 14,146
Thanks for your effort, Muhler! This is what I meant, it would have been better to have chosen the shorter option to look into the whole issue and leaving if not suitable instead of committing and dropping out after a short time.
Reply With Quote
  #42  
Old 10-10-2018, 10:13 AM
Archduchess Zelia's Avatar
Heir Apparent
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
Posts: 3,187
Joachim has no right to be disappointed in Nikolai. Nor does anyone else. It's Nikolai's life and military is not for everyone. Doesn't mean he has a weak character and it definitely won't affect his future (aside from maybe positively – you won't be happy if you force yourself through something you don't have your heart in). For what it's worth, it always seemed very forced. Especially in the way Nikolai himself worded it: "it was a wish within the family". A military career never seemed to be his own dream as much as it was a wish to appease his family's dreams for him. The world would be a lot easier if parents stopped living through and installing a looming threat of disappointment over their children if they fail to succeed their expectations.
__________________
"Hope is like the sun. If you only believe it when you see it you'll never make it through the night."
Our Princess

Reply With Quote
  #43  
Old 10-10-2018, 10:36 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
Well, I happen to believe in commitment.

If you commit yourself to anything you do your very best to go through.
Quitting is another world for personal defeat. And it damages your self-esteem.
Sometimes you have to grit your teeth and carry on. Doing that you win a victory and that's good for your self-esteem, even if you hate it while it goes on.

I didn't volunteer for conscription. In fact I wasn't even that keen on serving in the military and I sure didn't like it at first! But I grew to like it, I learned to appreciate that the way the military did things perhaps made sense after all.
And I won a string of little personal victories and earned the respect of my comrades. I learned to feel proud about myself - something you really weren't supposed to be back in the 80's BTW.
That was a personal development I would have missed, had I had the opportunity to opt out after a few weeks.
Reply With Quote
  #44  
Old 10-10-2018, 10:44 AM
Somebody's Avatar
Majesty
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Somewhere, Suriname
Posts: 8,310
I agree that if you commit yourself, you should do your utmost to make it work. If Nikolai doubted from the start he should have chosen the shorter program of 3-4 months, so he still had some military experience without committing himself for 2 years and dropping out very early on.

It will be interesting to see what he ends up doing.
Reply With Quote
  #45  
Old 10-10-2018, 10:47 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
Alexandra has issued a statement about why Nikolai decided to leave the military: https://www.bt.dk/royale/grevinde-al...lai-droppet-ud

Årsagen til, at han er stoppet, er, at han ikke føler, han er kommet på den rette hylde
The reason why he stopped is that he doesn't feel that he ended up on the right shelve.

Det har intet at gøre med uddannelsen eller folkene, der er der. Han har været meget glad for det, og det har været som forventet, men han føler altså bare ikke, at han er kommet på rette hylde.
It has nothing to do with the education or the people who are there. He has been very fond of it and it has been as expected, but he simply doesn't feel he has ended up on the right shelve.

ADDED:
If I may be permitted to speculate I cannot help wondering whether this was Nikolai's first big personal challenge. He is a very bright young man! There is no question about that.
And sometimes very bright young people float through the school-system, getting very good grades without that much of an effort. And when they are faced with a novel situation where it's more hard work and sheer determination, rather than just relying on intelligence, they experience a shock!
Again, this is speculation.
However, I have over time met quite a few very intelligent people who ended up in low-skilled jobs, because they did not have the psychological strength to grit their teeth and work hard and determined to reach a goal, all through their lives.
Having said that, most such people do however take such a personal defeat, which quitting basically is, as a valuable lesson that benefits them later on. I sincerely hope that will be the case for Nikolai.
Reply With Quote
  #46  
Old 10-10-2018, 12:11 PM
LibrarianDaisy's Avatar
Aristocracy
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Leicester, United Kingdom
Posts: 185
Quote:
Originally Posted by Archduchess Zelia View Post
Joachim has no right to be disappointed in Nikolai. Nor does anyone else. It's Nikolai's life and military is not for everyone. Doesn't mean he has a weak character and it definitely won't affect his future (aside from maybe positively – you won't be happy if you force yourself through something you don't have your heart in). For what it's worth, it always seemed very forced. Especially in the way Nikolai himself worded it: "it was a wish within the family". A military career never seemed to be his own dream as much as it was a wish to appease his family's dreams for him. The world would be a lot easier if parents stopped living through and installing a looming threat of disappointment over their children if they fail to succeed their expectations.
I agree Archduchess Zelia. Rather than seeing it as a weakness I think it takes a lot of courage to admit that your choice in life was the wrong thing especially considering Nikolai's family background where all males have had some form of military career so family expectations would have been high.
__________________
'I have always had a dread of becoming a passenger in life' Queen Margrethe II of Denmark
Reply With Quote
  #47  
Old 10-10-2018, 12:25 PM
Somebody's Avatar
Majesty
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Somewhere, Suriname
Posts: 8,310
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler View Post
Det har intet at gøre med uddannelsen eller folkene, der er der. Han har været meget glad for det, og det har været som forventet, men han føler altså bare ikke, at han er kommet på rette hylde.
It has nothing to do with the education or the people who are there. He has been very fond of it and it has been as expected, but he simply doesn't feel he has ended up on the right shelve.
The way it is phrased is interesting: it was as expected but still he realized that he didn't want what he signed up for. So, that mainly shows that the decision process wasn't a good one. If it was different than expected, it would at least make some sense, but given that according to Alexandra it was what he expected, he knew beforehand that this wasn't where he wanted to be but he apparently felt pressured to completely go against his own judgment.
Reply With Quote
  #48  
Old 10-10-2018, 12:36 PM
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: san diego, United States
Posts: 10,073
Im sorry to see him drop out after only 2 months. I got a little hint of it after seeing him get some time away after a short period.
I do think Joachim is disappointed, he has said he very much expected Nikolai to do some time in the military. But of course he loves his son 100%. The two can go together.
https://www.billedbladet.dk/kongelig...ais-beslutning

I hope the best for Nikolai. Showing commitment is important. He is a bright young man and I hope he makes the right decisions.

Do we know if he will move back home with Alexandra?
Reply With Quote
  #49  
Old 10-10-2018, 06:46 PM
HereditaryPrincess's Avatar
Heir Apparent
Royal Blogger
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: London, United Kingdom
Posts: 13,871
Quote:
Originally Posted by Archduchess Zelia View Post
Joachim has no right to be disappointed in Nikolai. Nor does anyone else. It's Nikolai's life and military is not for everyone. Doesn't mean he has a weak character and it definitely won't affect his future (aside from maybe positively – you won't be happy if you force yourself through something you don't have your heart in). For what it's worth, it always seemed very forced. Especially in the way Nikolai himself worded it: "it was a wish within the family". A military career never seemed to be his own dream as much as it was a wish to appease his family's dreams for him. The world would be a lot easier if parents stopped living through and installing a looming threat of disappointment over their children if they fail to succeed their expectations.
I agree. I was in a similar situation to Nikolai around this time last month after I had to defer from university for a year, since I just wasn't ready for it at this point having had a long struggle with anxiety. I pressured myself to apply now since it was what everyone else thought was best, though deep down I knew that it wasn't the right choice for me at this point in time. Someone later told me that realising this is a strong sign of maturity and determination, and I think that this is very true for Nikolai too. I hope he manages to find something that he enjoys in the near future. It will be interesting to see what path he chooses to take.
__________________
"For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone". Audrey Hepburn

*
"Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy". Anne Frank
Reply With Quote
  #50  
Old 10-11-2018, 03:29 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
https://www.bt.dk/royale/her-er-prin...fremtidsplaner

Alexandra, through her private secretary, has elaborated on Nikolai's future plans.
"He will take care of/pursue his modelling career until next year, where he will begin studying. As the plan is right now he will start studying after the summer holidays."
Han vil passe sin modelkarriere indtil næste år, hvor han vil læse videre. Som planen er lige nu begynder han på et studie efter sommerferien,«

However, the secretary can't say what he is going to study as Nikolai hasn't applied yet:
"But he will study in Denmark."
Hvilken uddannelse sætter hun dog ikke ord på, idet prinsen endnu ikke har søgt ind.
»Men det er et studie i Danmark
,

"He will until then take those modelling jobs he can get, says the private secretary.
»Han vil indtil da tage de modeljobs, han kan få,« fortæller Helle von Wildenrath Løvgreen.
Reply With Quote
  #51  
Old 10-11-2018, 03:46 AM
Heir Presumptive
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: alpine village, Germany
Posts: 2,932
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler View Post

I sincerely hope he will not end up as a rich spoiled kid. With a lot of potential but without the will to go through. - That lapel is very difficult to get rid of!

He is the grandson of an artist, so maybe this is the way he wants to go. He always gave me some vibes that he was not really interested in "proving" to be a real man (which is what Henrik IMHO enforced in both his sons). And let's face it: he was born into a role that won't pay for him in his adulthood. So IMHO it is his personal right to interpret this role as he sees fit.



Maybe he found something in the fashion industry that this course in the military could not give him. It happened to Prince Edward as well. Maybe he wants to become a designer himself, he might even start to learn how to sew. His grandmother is a good example and she knows how much it costs her to have a full-time job that did not allow her to follow a career in art herself. I don't think he dropped out of the military without having talked to his grandmother the queen about it. So let's just see what he will decide on.
Reply With Quote
  #52  
Old 10-11-2018, 05:15 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
Well, the thing I fear is that he will end up in the gossip mags as another jet-set kid with too much time and too much money on their hands - or, which is more likely, will be portrayed as a rich jet-set kid with too much...
Because I happen to believe Joachim and Alexandra will have no qualms about cutting his allowance, should he actually misbehave. I.e. You wanna party? Go earn the money first!

Nikolai can't run away from his royal background. Especially if and when he makes mistakes. The medias will make sure of that!

Okay, upon reflection I think most of us can agree he should never have signed up for the NCO/reserve officers school. His heart obviously wasn't in it otherwise he wouldn't have quit after such a short time. Probably made worse by the fact that he would have been surrounded by other young people who were determined to become officers.
Volunteer conscription would have been more manageable and he would still have done "his duty to his country" so to speak. And more importantly he would have won a victory both personally and publicly.

I do sympathize with PH in him instilling in his sons to become "real men" (f/m) in the sense that a stint in the military is character building and instills a sense self-discipline and carrying on with your duty, also when it isn't fun at all!

Does Nikolai have an artistic streak? I don't know. I don't recall having read or heard anything suggesting that he should have a particular creative talent.
He is however a very intelligent young man, so it will be interesting to see what he will end up studying. - Provided of course he can gain entry to his preferred education. I am pretty certain he will prefer to study in Copenhagen, otherwise Southern Danish University, where our Marie is heavily involved, would and could be an alternative.

I won't blame Edward for dropping out of the Royal Marines. Which is in a totally different league from a two year course to be an officer of the reserves or even becoming a regular officer at Sandhurst for that matter.
Reply With Quote
  #53  
Old 10-11-2018, 05:27 AM
Duke of Marmalade's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
TRF Author
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Frankfurt am Main, Germany
Posts: 14,146
It is obvious that his family wants him to have a serious job, military didn't work now university will be on the card, I understand from Alex' comments that he can do now what he wants (modelling) until next summer when he starts studying.
Joachim is very elitist too, I don't believe the parents are very happy but what can they do. Nikolai has pushed the boundaries once by dropping out of the military I believe the parents will now make it very clear to him that they want to see finished studies at university. Joachim is infamous for snobbish behaviour like insisting that his sons are called Princes, I doubt he lets Nikolai have his way in the long term doing modelling.
Reply With Quote
  #54  
Old 10-11-2018, 05:36 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
Agree.

I imagine Joachim and Alexandra will have or have had a little chat with Nikolai asking: "Now what?!?"

And while his mother may find it endearing I too very much doubt that Joachim, who is pretty conservative, is that impressed with Nikolai's modelling career. It's fine for earning some extra money while studying but as a living? No way Joachim is going to accept that.
And career is to be generous, because it's hard work to be a serious and successful model! Nikolai after all hasn't even attended a modelling school. He's just a "fresh-faced" amateur - and that will only take him so far.
Reply With Quote
  #55  
Old 10-11-2018, 05:47 AM
eya eya is offline
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: -, Greece
Posts: 24,829
Very interesting we see what Nikolai doing next. I hope don't be rush to make a desicion again.
Reply With Quote
  #56  
Old 10-11-2018, 05:56 AM
Marengo's Avatar
Administrator
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: São Paulo, Brazil
Posts: 24,626
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler
Nikolai after all hasn't even attended a modelling school
Uhm… is there such a thing as modelling school ? What on earth do they teach?

Out of curiosity: is it customary that questions about the princes are not directed at prince Joachim's secretariat or the one of the royal family but that they contact Css Alexandra? And is it customary for her to write statements about her sons on her own, without the father signing in?
__________________
TRF Rules and FAQ
Reply With Quote
  #57  
Old 10-11-2018, 07:34 AM
Muhler's Avatar
Imperial Majesty
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Eastern Jutland, Denmark
Posts: 15,655
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marengo View Post
Uhm… is there such a thing as modelling school ? What on earth do they teach?

Out of curiosity: is it customary that questions about the princes are not directed at prince Joachim's secretariat or the one of the royal family but that they contact Css Alexandra? And is it customary for her to write statements about her sons on her own, without the father signing in?
Oh yes!

They are taught about make up and lighting. About posing and presentation and also how to represent. Models after all don't just walk up and down catwalks or stand in front of a camera. They are also very much used at events. - The girls who at least used to adorn the hoods on new car-models springs to mind not to mention the Tour de France girls - they are all professionals.
They also learn about dieting and skin-care.
Professionals spend a lot of time in the gym, on the road, going to endless auditions and dealing with dirty old pigs - of both sexes...
So it's hard work, and just like athletes, only a minority will end up being able to live from being a model.

I can't say why Alexandra decided to issue a statement. Perhaps she was getting a lot of calls and decided to deal with it this way? And I imagine those from the press optimistic enough to call Joachim's private secretary would simply get a "no comments"
Customary... Well, it all depends on how you look at Nikolai.
He is royal, with title and all, but has officially decided not to have a royal role and on top of that he mainly lives with his mother who is divorced from a royal.
So he is a bit in a limbo.
Alexandra's statement is IMO clearly private, whether it has been co-ordinated with Joachim, let alone the court is an open question.

Quite a few of the comments I have seen from the public are not that impressed with Nikolai having his mother speak on his behalf.

But apart from that, this is already very much yesterday's news.
Reply With Quote
  #58  
Old 10-11-2018, 07:40 AM
moby's Avatar
Serene Highness
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 1,210
Oh that was quick. I understand commitment but can sort of relate to what it's like to be told by parents to do something you don't want to do. In my case, I ended up working really hard to pursue my interests just to prove my parents wrong and that was a personal triumph in itself lol.

I think it's too soon to judge whether Nikolai is committed or not, but for sure he has to figure out what he wants and devote himself to it. Whatever he does, I hope he recognizes and acknowledges the immense privilege he has and do something worthwhile with the endless opportunities he was born with.
Reply With Quote
  #59  
Old 10-11-2018, 07:47 AM
Heir Apparent
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Waterford, United States
Posts: 3,177
We make many mistakes throughout life, and ideally, we learn from them. The military was, apparently, not totally Nikolai’s decision. He may be very wary of allowing himself to be pushed again. Maybe he wants to try to make it on his own for a bit, modeling, living in a funky flat with friends, being a young person in today’s world. You can only enjoy the freedom of youth when you are young.

Many people find themselves with big responsibilities at 40, and realize that they never had that freedom. A man with a mid-life crisis (or a woman), may try to get that freedom, divorce, abdication of family responsibilities...

Nikolai is 19. He should be allowed to mature at his own pace. He’ll likely come around eventually and settle into grown up life.
__________________
"If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will.”

Abraham Lincoln
Reply With Quote
  #60  
Old 10-11-2018, 08:40 AM
Majesty
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Pittsburgh, United States
Posts: 8,504
Quote:
Originally Posted by Muhler View Post
https://www.bt.dk/royale/her-er-prin...fremtidsplaner

Alexandra, through her private secretary, has elaborated on Nikolai's future plans.
"He will take care of/pursue his modelling career until next year, where he will begin studying. As the plan is right now he will start studying after the summer holidays."
Han vil passe sin modelkarriere indtil næste år, hvor han vil læse videre. Som planen er lige nu begynder han på et studie efter sommerferien,«

However, the secretary can't say what he is going to study as Nikolai hasn't applied yet:
"But he will study in Denmark."
Hvilken uddannelse sætter hun dog ikke ord på, idet prinsen endnu ikke har søgt ind.
»Men det er et studie i Danmark
,

"He will until then take those modelling jobs he can get, says the private secretary.
»Han vil indtil da tage de modeljobs, han kan få,« fortæller Helle von Wildenrath Løvgreen.
It is pretty much in line with what I expected then. He is prioritizing his modeling career in the near future, which seems to be something he enjoys and is presumably profitable. The next step will be a university degree, which does’t prevent him from taking occasional modeling jobs while studying. Given his royal background and his parents’ ( especially his mother’s) connections, it should be relatively easy for him to land a good job in the private sector after he graduates from university.
Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Nikolai and Felix: Future Possibilities and Options Julia Prince Joachim, Princess Marie and Family 90 02-12-2022 02:44 PM
Princes Nikolai, Felix, Henrik & Princess Athena, Part 1: February 2012 - July 2018 iceflower Current Events Archive 593 07-15-2018 09:24 AM
Prince Nikolai, Prince Felix and Prince Henrik, News 1: July 2009 - February 2012 Mandy Current Events Archive 256 02-05-2012 09:00 AM
Prince Nikolai and Prince Felix, Current Events 1: September 2005 - July 2009 Josefine Current Events Archive 556 07-26-2009 02:23 PM




Popular Tags
abdullah ii africa albert prince consort all tags america arcadie claret austria braganza british royal family caribbean caroline castile charles iii claret congo current events danish royal family death de la cerda denmark duchess of kent duke of cambridge elizabeth ii emperor naruhito empress masako espana garsenda genealogy grimaldi guzman hamdan bin ahmed history identifying india introduction ivrea jordan royal family king charles king edward iii king henry iii king philippe king willem-alexander louis mountbatten maria ii matrilineal monarchy need help official visit order of precedence orleans-braganza pedro ii prince albert monaco prince andrew prince charles queen camilla queen elizabeth queen margrethe ii queen mathilde queen maxima queen victoria republics restoration royal initials spain spanish history spanish royal family state visit switzerland visit wine glass


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:47 PM.

Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2022
Jelsoft Enterprises