The Duke and Duchess of Sussex with Oprah I - Pre-interview, Feb-March 2021

[Fem]

So, a more serious commentary of the subject.

Meghan feels that certain restrictions, which were explained to her since the beginning - and a group of flying elephants will not convince me otherwise - were too much for her to handle. That's a basic requirement of this job and of this family, something mentioned in hundreds of documentaries and articles. She got a taste of it even before the wedding - if it was too much for her to handle, why not call the whole thing off? Why not negotiate a different position, without a title, that would allow her to have more freedom? Why agree to be a full-time working royal, while she perfectly knew that it was too much for her?

I feel somewhat sympathetic towards that. It's hard to suddenly not be able to voice your opinion on anything, to smile and shake hands of foreign dignitaries, heads of state or diplomats that you, deep down, hate. I do understand the struggle. What I don't understand, is why she did it.

It gives a lot of credentials to the theory that she had that exit planned since day one She wanted to suffer through a few years, get her name out there, become an international star and pack up her life from UK (with her husband or not) and go back to California, to live her life as lavishly as she wants, in a mansion with 16 bathrooms, without the boundaries of the job. It's sickening in the worst way possible.

And I won't even start on Harry, who either got conned in one of the most spectacular ways in royal history or has been stupid enough to go with the plan and execute it, knowing that it'll hurt his whole family.

 

[Princess_Eleanor]

I will say one thing: if it is conclusively proven that she did bully her staff, Oprah, Gayle King and CBS will be hugely embarrassed.

 

[RandyDrx]

IMO Meghan didn't have enough time to observe and get to know the Firm. Most of their relationship she lived in Canada. With time difference and busy schedules during calls or being together H&M focused on each other. There probably wasn't enough time for Harry to talk about everyday work-life in the Palace.
To compare, Kate got years of second-hand experience of being a royal and reality of workng with palace staff. Not to mention being somebody's boss. It's much different than being an emploee or an actress on set.



Meghan was not prepared enough and didn't ease into her new role. She jumped right in.

My thoughts exactly, Harry and Meghan met in 2016 and just a year later, they announced their engagement. I think they got engaged a bit too fast compared to other royals in their generation.

 

[Nico]

I somehow feel this is just the start - is going to do ever talk show, late show in the states - maybe a few in the UK. Got to tell her truth - spread it around.
I mean she has to counter ever single thing in the UK press, on the internet and twitter somehow, to counter all that bullying and negativity of her image. I can image how the Netflix and Spotify account will be.
Today on Spotify I would like to start about how racist it was for Buckingham Palace to make me wear a hat. My special guests with be Ellen and Omid and we will show you how you can also stand up for racism with your refusal to wear head gear.

And a lot of posters experienced that first hand on this very same forum.
How many very valuable members, now gone, often experienced royal watchers, where called out as racists because they dared to raise some doubts about Ms Markle 's abilty to adjust to the Royal life.
Now she's saying it : apparently it was unbearable.
Monarchy is not a game, a part time hobby, a springboard to worldwide recognition. It's a difficult, challenging, exhausting monster with intricate rules.
And as we all know, the Crown always win.

 

[Claire]

I will say one thing: if it is conclusively proven that she did bully her staff, Oprah, Gayle King and CBS will be hugely embarrassed.

Unless there is video or a very good audio somewhere it is unlikely to be conclusively 100% believed.

However there are currently people looking for the smoking gun right now.

 

[Nico]

My thoughts exactly, Harry and Meghan met in 2016 and just a year later, they announced their engagement. I think they got engaged a bit too fast compared to other royals in their generation.

And, allegedly, that's why Wiliam told his brother that the engagement was coming too fast. And Harry was not pleased.

 

[Somebody]

Maybe that will be addressed. Perhaps she did not realize how restrictive it really was until she was in it. Knowing you cant just say whatever whenever is one thing...being handled is a different level.


LaRae

I am sure that experiencing and hearing about it are different (although prior to the engagement she had staff already nod her in the right direction, so she had some experience). However, in her South Africa-interview she herself told that when people tried to warn her about her new life (regarding the media in that specific case), she was fast to dismiss it and not willing to hear anything about it. So, that could very well apply to the limitations placed on royals in terms of sharing their points of view as well; I am quite sure she was told about it but she may have chosen to ignore it as it did not align with her goal of marrying her prince.

 

[Pranter]

I am sure that experiencing and hearing about it are different (although prior to the engagement she had staff already nod her in the right direction, so she had some experience). However, in her South Africa-interview she herself told that when people tried to warn her about her new life (regarding the media in that specific case), she was fast to dismiss it and not willing to hear anything about it. So, that could very well apply to the limitations placed on royals in terms of sharing their points of view as well; I am quite sure she was told about it but she may have chosen to ignore it as it did not align with her goal of marrying her prince.

Her goal of marrying a prince? Do you have info I have not seen?

She dis not dismiss the comments and ignore them just for the sake of not wanting to hear it, she did not understand it would be as bad as it was.


LaRae

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

I fear that history is repeating itself but not the way Harry was referring to.
if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all
Panorama burnt all bridges and the same will happen here.
And the relation to the BRF is the one thing that is interesting about Harry and Meghan.
Once this is gone, the Hollywood scene has many philanthropic people who have a much more interesting appeal.

They will be lose cannons soon, and possibly Harry will repeat history indeed, being torn between two worlds, like his great-great uncle David.

 

[HighGoalHighDreams]

Here's the problem, IMO, about saying things now like you didn't have the "right and privilege" to speak to Oprah back in 2018. No, you surely did not.

You had the "right and privilege" to:

• Have a horse-drawn carriage pull you down closed streets
• Have the flowers of the Commonwealth embossed on your veil as a symbol that you represented those people
• Wear clothes and jewels of immense price purchased by your husband from monies afforded to him and his family only due to their rank and position
• Wear a crown on your head representing the favor of HM The Queen as representative of the people of the United Kingdom
• Be entrusted with a Commonwealth role as representative of HM The Queen
• Your husband, as a gift upon his marriage to you, being granted a hereditary royal ducal title that all educated commentators understood 100% without question was granted to him in exchange for a life of service to the Crown

If this trade-off was a problem, the Sussexes never should have accepted any of the above. And they continue to live every day of their lives reaping the benefits of accepting the above.

What was the Sussex team line? "Let's call this what it is"?

I don't believe for one moment that the Sussexes did not know the exchange, or "what they were getting themselves into." So, if they knew the above "trade-off" wasn't acceptable to them, why take it in the first place? If it was going to be a problem to not have the "right and privilege" to give an interview to Oprah, why make the trade-off above in the first place?

Because without doing it, they never get where they are today.

TRF friends, this line from the Oprah interview is absolutely a huge revelation. Despite many denying it could possibly be the case when others said it was, the couple has, in fact, been planning to sit down with Oprah since the wedding. They invited her there with the intention of sitting down with her. And they knew if that happened, they would be out... and invited her anyway, and took the "exchange" anyway. There was never any good-faith intention to have this work. "Let's call this what it is," and it's becoming clear with every line that Oprah drips from this interview.

 

[MaiaMia_53]

I'm sure, as in life generally, there were a lot of things that went on behind-the-scenes in the gilded cage. We will have to wait and see the entire interview in context to gain a full gist of the thrust of the interview. So far, we've only seen snippets. In the latest excerpt, I see an acknowledgement by Meghan that she was used to being independent, and that the reality of the institution behind-the-scenes is not the vision that most of us on the outside might harbor. All of that sounds reasonable to me.

Despite Meghan's mature independence and difficulty in adjusting to life behind palace walls, I believe M&H were willing to do everything they could to make things work, short of continuing to be abused in the media; or expected to give the media full access for favorable stories; or expected to put up with slights and lies, and being marginalized due to apparent misgivings in some quarters regarding their popularity as the newest young married royals. The intense over-interest in the Sussexes could have been modulated and handled had a united front been presented, with mutual understanding of the difficulties on all sides. Meghan has already said that she expected life as a royal to be a huge challenge, but that she also expected fairness.

The important thing to remember is that Meghan & Harry endured a lot of negative press stories in silence while still working senior royals. When they stepped back to carve out a new life, they remained silent and minded their own business. The U.K. media termed them irrelevant, yet kept writing often made-up and misleading stories about them. Then there began a litany of stories describing Harry as looking sad, and calling for him to come back to the royal fold. The stories in the media have been non-stop, while M&H have often not been seen for weeks at a time over the last year. M&H did everything they could to set boundaries with the media and to try and stop leaks by obtaining private representation. Yet the press negativity continued. The negative coverage of the wreath laying denial; the untrue slams about Harry neglecting the U.K. military; the malicious stories about Archie's bc; plus the briefing against Meghan to the Mail Online by a palace source which was revealed during the legal battle -- all of this combined apparently pushed M&H to where they decided to take the step of finally talking to Oprah.

In part, I think the interview will cover news about their new lives and some details about the projects they are working on. There was also previously an indication that Archie would make an appearance. So the snippets we've seen so far do not give us a full picture of the overall tone of the interview, nor do we yet know exactly how much they will bring out into the open. In presenting the latest clip, Gayle King said that while no questions were off limits and M&H were forthcoming on everything, they also declined to answer a few questions, and explained why.

Interesting details presented in the below article regarding M&H's mindset on deciding to give a 'sit-down interview':
https://www.glamour.com/story/megha...itter&utm_social-type=owned&utm_medium=social

 

[lady of hay]

The heart has it's reasons, and love knows none , as the saying goes .
She was made welcome , as far as we know, Christmas at Sandringham , tour of the U K. Day trip with the Queen .
I don't think you understand the life until you live it, or at least take the advice of those who have .
The whole thing is very sad .

 

[Hallo girl]

Her goal of marrying a prince? Do you have info I have not seen?

She dis not dismiss the comments and ignore them just for the sake of not wanting to hear it, she did not understand it would be as bad as it was.


LaRae

To be fair the poster said " her prince".

 

[Nico]

She dis not dismiss the comments and ignore them just for the sake of not wanting to hear it, she did not understand it would be as bad as it was.


LaRae

For a woman of the world, successful actress, philanthropist, wolrdwide public figure etc, as she was sold to us by her fans, you have to admit this is rather bizarre :
"I"m sorry, i didn't FULLY understand all the implications".
C'mon ...

 

[Pranter]

To be fair the poster said " her prince".

The implication of agenda is what I refer to. Its usually pretty openly said in this group that she had an agenda to catch Harry and live the life of a jet setter....no proof given of course and then hiding behind “its just my opinion”. So over it.


LaRae

 

[Pranter]

For a woman of the world, successful actress, philanthropist, wolrdwide public figure etc, as she was sold to us by her fans, you have to admit this is rather bizarre :
"I"m sorry, i didn't FULLY inderstand all the implications".
C'mon ...

I did not say that she didn't have an idea but no, I think she said herself she had no idea it would be that bad.

 

[Somebody]

Her goal of marrying a prince? Do you have info I have not seen?

She dis not dismiss the comments and ignore them just for the sake of not wanting to hear it, she did not understand it would be as bad as it was.


LaRae

Please read carefully. I wrote 'marrying HER prince' - whether him being a prince was part of her attraction for him is for her to answer (not literally - we may all have our own thoughts about it but noone can proof it either way).

 

[Biset]

I did not say that she didn't have an idea but no, I think she said herself she had no idea it would be that bad.

Well, William warned them and he was made out to be the bad guy. They’ve said over and over they didn’t get enough support from the palaca. But from their own words we see that they were offered support, they just didn’t take it.

 

[Lucy Scot]

If Meghan thinks this interview will give her the chance to "speak her truth' then she must also be prepared for the BRF to speak theirs and the result will be increasingly heightened emotions and a deeper rift.

No, the BRF should not speak their truth. They should stick to their "Never complain, never explain" way of doing business. They never spoke up when Meghan was being brutalized in the press, so they should not speak up now.

 

[Hallo girl]

The implication of agenda is what I refer to. Its usually pretty openly said in this group that she had an agenda to catch Harry and live the life of a jet setter....no proof given of course and then hiding behind “its just my opinion”. So over it.


LaRae

Her goal of marrying a prince is in my eyes different to her goal of marrying her prince.
Wording can be so misconstrued in posts. We need to take care not to become over sensitive and read what isnt there in posts.
Some posters are not writing in their first language or using words and phrases that have slightly different interpretation in different
Countries.

 

[Pranter]

Her goal of marrying a prince is in my eyes different to her goal of marrying her prince.
Wording can be so misconstrued in posts. We need to take care not to become over sensitive and read what isnt there in posts.
Some posters are not writing in their first language or using words and phrases that have slightly different interpretation in different
Countries.

Oversensitive? Yeah a scrolling back over the past months disproves that one. Continual dog pile on her every move.


LaRae

 

[Mbruno]

The heart has it's reasons, and love knows none , as the saying goes .
She was made welcome , as far as we know, Christmas at Sandringham , tour of the U K. Day trip with the Queen .
I don't think you understand the life until you live it, or at least take the advice of those who have .
The whole thing is very sad .

There was a time, not so long ago, when royals only married other royals (usually from another country). That was in part international diplomacy; partly a reflection of the class system (royalty being a special social class separated from the nobility as well as the commoners); and partly a consequence of the belief that only people who grew up as royals would adapt to royal life.



Nowadays, however, that is no longer the case and there are tons of outsider women and men who are not even from the nobility, much less royalty, but who married nonetheless into RFs: Sonja Haraldsen, Silvia Sommerlath, Maria Teresa Mestre, Mette-Marit Tjessem Høiby, Daniel Westling, Sofia Helqvist, Letizia Ortiz Rocasolano, Mary Donaldson, Máxima Zorreguieta, Marie Cavalier, Sophie Rhys-Jones, Catherine Middleton, and so on. Some of those like Mary, Máxima and Marie also had to move to another country and even take up another language and culture. Yet, none of them, sometimes despite getting very negative press and vicious social media attacks (e.g. Letizia, or even Kate at times), failed to understand the life they were marrying into and the liabilities. as well as the perks, that came with the job.



I know that the mods frown upon comparisons between different royals, but was Meghan handled in a way that differed significantly from other women in similar positions? Was she "silenced" or somehow restricted in her personal freedom more than anybody else who is supposed to do the same kind of job? Or, putting it in a different way, why did she expect to receive special treatment or get an extra freedom that was never given to any of her royal peers, not even the Head of State herself?

 

[Lucy Scot]

I don't think they regret doing the interview. Everything coming out now from the allegations and accusations is precisely why they needed to do the interview.

Oh, I agree with you. I didn't say that they regret doing the interview. I don't think they regret it. I think they might regret that they didn't go far enough in what they said, or speak with more candor in light of what has come out after the interview was recorded. I wish that Oprah would interview them again so that they could respond. Although they are probably in territory now where their legal team is telling them not to respond.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

I have to say I really REALLY hate hearing the BRF referred to as "The Firm". I know the DoE is the one who first coined the phrase but my understanding is that it was a jokey, one off sort of thing.

Hearing the DoS refer to what is essentially her family by marriage that way...during an Oprah Winfrey interview clip no less....made me cringe.

 

[lady of hay]

Did she expect it ? I don't know ,but I do know that it appears the BRF did everything they could to make her welcome.

This is one interview I will not be watching. I shall just look forward to reading the comments here.?

 

[REAL COUNTESS]

Wow so far there are 588 post's and the interview is not out until the 7th on Sunday. After this interview made it's way around the world I believe 68 countries bought the rights to this farce, so the world can see and hear how she was silenced and buckle under poor little privileged young women, who didn't get her way, so throw a tantrum fit for a 3 year old. There is no excuse for Harry to act in this manner, he know how to conduct himself as a member of this family, since he was born into it. I am almost certain Diana told them, Harry and William the yes and no's, within the boundary's of the family structure. With Title and privilege comes Responsibility. The Title and Name opens doors who would otherwise not be opened, when you are on the other side of the door, you are the deciding factor, if this door stay's open for you or close for ever? Maybe after this interview there will be a Reality show in the works, maybe all about them or share the spotlight with Andrew Cuomo, to see who can play the role of Victim better H/M or the Gov???

 

[Hallo girl]

Why are assumptions being made that everything Meghan says is absolutely correct but anybody from the UK or the palace must be speaking falsely and trying to discredit her.
We don't know the truth. Only the people involved know.
I love that expression ' her truth " , why not the truth.

 

[Mbruno]

Why are assumptions being made that everything Meghan says is absolutely correct but anybody from the UK or the palace must be speaking falsely and trying to discredit her.
We don't know the truth. Only the people involved know.
I love that expression ' her truth " , why not the truth.

As discussed before, "speaking your truth" is now a cliché expression in the US. I don't know about the UK or in Europe in general.

 

[US Royal Watcher]

In part, I think the interview will cover news about their new lives and some details about the projects they are working on. There was also previously an indication that Archie would make an appearance. So the snippets we've seen so far do not give us a full picture of the overall tone of the interview, nor do we yet know exactly how much they will bring out into the open. In presenting the latest clip, Gayle King said that while no questions were off limits and M&H were forthcoming on everything, they also declined to answer a few questions, and explained why.

Interesting details presented in the below article regarding M&H's mindset on deciding to give a 'sit-down interview':
https://www.glamour.com/story/megha...itter&utm_social-type=owned&utm_medium=social

I edited your excellent post for space but although I appreciate your point that the full interview may contain some very positive information about their current goals, it doesn't address my concerns about whether they should be complaining about the palace staff at all.

It is fair for Meghan and Harry to complain about the media because the media can respond. Similarly, Meghan and Harry could have criticized members of the family (and still might), but members of the family have access to platforms to respond (they wouldn't but they could). But by criticizing palace staff, Meghan and Harry are giving credence to the allegations of bullying.

Harry and Meghan can get an Oprah and air their allegations on an international stage - the staff can't. The staff may be able to anonymously leak some information to sympathetic journalists, but it hardly the same. Even responding anonymously carries the risk of losing their livelihoods. And responding publicly would certainly result in losing their jobs and risking future employment.

It is really the staff who are voiceless. Why do Meghan and Harry feel the need to attack the most vulnerable, least powerful players in this drama? Harry and Meghan didn't like their roles and walked away. They could have limited any public criticism those who could effectively respond but apparently have not.

The faceless "men in gray suits" are human beings with feelings. Those who insist that we give Meghan and Harry the benefit of the doubt should do the same for the staff. The staff were probably very excited about working with Harry and Meghan, worked hard and did their best. I can't believe they didn't care about Meghan's feelings and wanted her to fail.

As the supervisor, I have a lot more power than my staff. I would never publicly criticize them. It's just unseemly and unkind. I'm very disappointed.

 

[US Royal Watcher]

Oh, I agree with you. I didn't say that they regret doing the interview. I don't think they regret it. I think they might regret that they didn't go far enough in what they said, or speak with more candor in light of what has come out after the interview was recorded. I wish that Oprah would interview them again so that they could respond. Although they are probably in territory now where their legal team is telling them not to respond.

Would Oprah then give the people making the allegations the opportunity to respond to Harry and Meghan's response?