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  #541  
Old 03-05-2021, 09:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lilyflo View Post
Here's an example of how I think she's shooting herself in the foot with this interview. She thinks she sounds reasonable by saying how restricted she was before, versus how liberated she now is to speak for herself. She doesn't sound reasonable at all actually because that's the deal when you become a working member of the BRF. That's the deal. She signed up to those restrictions, that protocol and that system without anyone forcing her. In return for the influential position and the huge privileges, you relinquish your right to voice an unvetted opinion for years until you reach the status of 'National Treasure' or become heir to the throne.
Yes, exactly! She chose to marry into the Royal Family. No one forced her. And, when you marry into the RF, you agree to abide by certain rules. Given the difficulties that Diana and Sarah had, I cannot imagine that those rules were not explained to her. I believe she just thought she could change them, but you don't change a 1000 yr old institution who has been successful because they have abided by those rules.
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  #542  
Old 03-05-2021, 09:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pranter View Post
Maybe that will be addressed. Perhaps she did not realize how restrictive it really was until she was in it. Knowing you cant just say whatever whenever is one thing...being handled is a different level.


LaRae
Why is she complaining about it then? Why is she making it seem like they royal family tortured her something? Is it the fault of “the firm” that she didn’t know the rules of the job?
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  #543  
Old 03-05-2021, 09:49 AM
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I do have to ask with all this overburdening and restrictive handling by her staff how was she able to write letters instructing her friends to release letters to the press and Omid Scobie.
Also the visit by Hillary Clinton, also trips to US for baby showers, tennis tournament were allowed, how?
  #544  
Old 03-05-2021, 09:54 AM
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I really don't get it. All the royals are handled, they all lead relatively limited lives. There personal freedom is impinged for their own safety most of the time. - is this an infringement on their human rights.
Is Meghan and Harry's newest charity to Free the royals of the world. Will they were organizing marches and getting Bono and Elton to release a single.
  #545  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:15 AM
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Could the handling also be an element of guidance and protection . Meghan was new to the family/firm , new to living in the UK.
  #546  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hallo girl View Post
Could the handling also be an element of guidance and protection . Meghan was new to the family/firm , new to living in the UK.
Perhaps she really doesn't get that all the royals have restricitions... and that the deal/bargain is that you marry into great wealth and a social position.. but you lose your freedom to do "just what you like"..
and I doubt if Oprah really understands the differences and restricions of royal life, so it is not going to be hard hitting type of interview....
  #547  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:19 AM
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I wonder if part of this I I review will be how different the reality is from little girl Princess dreams.

I mean I will drink to that.
  #548  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:34 AM
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I think Meghan was expecting a lifestyle of a mega celebrity or uber rich and then realized you are a civil servant living in a drafty castle with low water pressure.
  #549  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Biset View Post
Why is she complaining about it then? Why is she making it seem like they royal family tortured her something? Is it the fault of “the firm” that she didn’t know the rules of the job?
Don't recall her indicating she felt tortured, until we see the actual interview kinda hard to know. I also have not seen her assessing fault to The Firm about not knowing the rules. However knowing something and living it are two separate things.


LaRae
  #550  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:42 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
I think Meghan was expecting a lifestyle of a mega celebrity or uber rich and then realized you are a civil servant living in a drafty castle with low water pressure.
Ah in fairness the homes are gorgeous.

But FF kept referring to the smallest of Harry's house in Kensington.

I think she didn't realise that they are like as a family, laid back and outdoorsy but the job aspect is highly controlled.

They spent exactly complement who she was.
  #551  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:43 AM
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From the BBC website:


"So, as an adult who lived a really independent life to then go into this construct that is different than I think what people imagine it to be, it's really liberating to be able to have the right and the privilege in some ways to be able to say, yes, I'm ready to talk, to say it to yourself.



"To be able to just make a choice on your own and to be able to speak for yourself."


I'm not sure what she hopes to achieve by saying this. A lot of people are in this position: because of your job, you have to be careful what you say in public. And I find it very hard to believe that she didn't understand that a member of the Royal Family can't just say whatever they want. I can quite see that it must be difficult to move from an independent lifestyle to that sort of lifestyle, but, if she didn't want to do that, then she should have either ended her relationship with Harry, as Chelsy Davy and Cressida Bonas did, or else told Harry that he was going to have to choose between the Royal Family and her.


If you start dating a senior member of the Royal Family, this is what you're letting yourself in for. Unless you're either very stupid or you've been living on Mars, neither of which apply to Meghan, you must know that. It's not very fair to join any sort of institution and then start complaining that you didn't want to abide by its rules and systems.


On a more basic level, it's like taking a job which requires you to work evenings and weekends, and then complaining that it's very difficult to do that when you're used to working 9-5, and that you want your evenings and weekends free. You took the job.
  #552  
Old 03-05-2021, 10:47 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Alison H View Post
From the BBC website:


"So, as an adult who lived a really independent life to then go into this construct that is different than I think what people imagine it to be, it's really liberating to be able to have the right and the privilege in some ways to be able to say, yes, I'm ready to talk, to say it to yourself.



"To be able to just make a choice on your own and to be able to speak for yourself."


I'm not sure what she hopes to achieve by saying this. A lot of people are in this position: because of your job, you have to be careful what you say in public. And I find it very hard to believe that she didn't understand that a member of the Royal Family can't just say whatever they want. I can quite see that it must be difficult to move from an independent lifestyle to that sort of lifestyle, but, if she didn't want to do that, then she should have either ended her relationship with Harry, as Chelsy Davy and Cressida Bonas did, or else told Harry that he was going to have to choose between the Royal Family and her. If you start dating a senior member of the Royal Family, this is what you're letting yourself in for. Unless you're either very stupid or you've been living on Mars, neither of which apply to Meghan, you must know that. It's not very fair to join any sort of institution and then start complaining that you didn't want to abide by its rules and systems.
You really hit the nail on the head. All of this demonstrates that she was either extremely unprepared for the role she was coming into OR she knew what would be required but somehow thought she would be exempt to the rule or that she would come in and single-handedly modernize the monarchy to change it to be more open. Speaking her truth is obviously something that is very, very important to her, but she should have known she wouldn’t be able to do that anymore. Either you accept that it’s something you’ll have to give up OR it’s a dealbreaker and you walk away.
  #553  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:06 AM
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IMO Meghan didn't have enough time to observe and get to know the Firm. Most of their relationship she lived in Canada. With time difference and busy schedules during calls or being together H&M focused on each other. There probably wasn't enough time for Harry to talk about everyday work-life in the Palace.
To compare, Kate got years of second-hand experience of being a royal and reality of workng with palace staff. Not to mention being somebody's boss. It's much different than being an emploee or an actress on set.



Meghan was not prepared enough and didn't ease into her new role. She jumped right in.
  #554  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:18 AM
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Another clip. I am not sure if it has been posted yet.

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-56293793
  #555  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RoyalNight View Post
IMO Meghan didn't have enough time to observe and get to know the Firm. Most of their relationship she lived in Canada. With time difference and busy schedules during calls or being together H&M focused on each other. There probably wasn't enough time for Harry to talk about everyday work-life in the Palace.
To compare, Kate got years of second-hand experience of being a royal and reality of workng with palace staff. Not to mention being somebody's boss. It's much different than being an emploee or an actress on set.



Meghan was not prepared enough and didn't ease into her new role. She jumped right in.
From the beginning I felt like she needed more time in a “pre-Royal” phase: moving to the UK and living there for a year or two before getting married to get used to the cultural shift and discovering if she even liked living in the UK (I think a big part of them leaving was that Meghan didn’t like living in the UK and didn’t really seem to mesh with Harry’s circle of friends and never seemed to form a close circle of friends of her own who were solely based in Britain) , or even taking a few years to ease into the full-time royal role. She went through a lot of major life changes in a short period of time. Within one year she moved countries, got married, got pregnant, and had a baby, which is all a lot in and of itself without even factoring in immediately jumping in as a full-time working royal. If you look at Kate, she had 8 years of being a royal girlfriend and then years after they were married to ease into the royal role, marriage, motherhood, etc. before being a full-time royal. I don’t think anyone would have begrudged Meghan if she had wanted to wait, but in the engagement interview she said it was her decision to jump right in and that she was excited to hit the ground running.
  #556  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:22 AM
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I am sorry - if this is the unbearable situation, she is pulling at straws. Many many people will happily trade their civil liberties to have an inch of what the royals have.
And as far as the preparation goes - she was the most trained princess in history, not a cost was spared or lesson not given. The only thing that could have gone wrong was Harry did not give the correct information or any information. Again a longer engagement or dating situation would have avoided that. And if that was the case - I would firmly unequivocally blame Harry.
  #557  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:25 AM
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Listening to the clip IMO the actress and drama came into it about , people in the room listening when she was trying to speak to Oprah on the phone. All very dramatic I am hoping that in the fuller piece she says she realises they were there to help and shield her from the media.
Harry issued statements asking for privacy but she wanted to do an interview with Oprah. The alarm bells must have been ringing.
  #558  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire View Post
I think Meghan was expecting a lifestyle of a mega celebrity or uber rich and then realized you are a civil servant living in a drafty castle with low water pressure.
Precisely.
The word "civil servant" is really important here, because it is REALLY the case. You don't belong to yourself, you belong to the People and yes, in exchange of an insanely privileged life, paid directly or indirectly by the taxpayer, you have to shut up, carry on and do whatever some bureaucrat decide you have to do.

I mean, that's not a mystery, this is precisely what the Monarchy is all about, what the Queen, Charles, Anne etc have done all their lives.
Of course this is not everyone's cup of tea, but at least when you sign for it, you know what to expect !

So i find rather extraordinary, to say the least, that now the duchess of Sussex is somewhat complaining that she felt constrained, unable to speak for herself, unable to be "free". But Darling, you were not supposed to do that ! It's a Monarchy, not a course of personal development.

How many girlfriends, potential wives etc left because they perfectly knew, because it's common knowledge, that the Royal life is all about duty, duty, duty with almost no room for maneuver. But Meghan, who is not stupid, seems to have discovered that almost by surprise. It doesn't make any kind of sense !

From day one i thought it would be very difficult for her to adjust, because, precisely, she would have to tone down from her previous life.

But now, she seems to act like an employee who is complaining afterwards about the terms of the contract she signed for, in full knowledge. That's a bit rich.
  #559  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:31 AM
Majesty
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hallo girl View Post
Listening to the clip IMO the actress and drama came into it about , people in the room listening when she was trying to speak to Oprah on the phone. All very dramatic I am hoping that in the fuller piece she says she realises they were there to help and shield her from the media.
Harry issued statements asking for privacy but she wanted to do an interview with Oprah. The alarm bells must have been ringing.
I thought that it said she couldn't have a personal conversation with Oprah? But that's something different. If she wanted to chat to Oprah... on a friend's level. I can't imagine anyone objecting to that.. but if she wanted to talk to Op about doing an interview.. surely she realised she could not do that.. She wasn't an actress promoting a TV show...
  #560  
Old 03-05-2021, 11:35 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mbruno View Post
Another clip. I am not sure if it has been posted yet.

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-56293793
As someone who works in the diplomatic world, I find that what she's describing, about not being able to speak and make particular choices on her own--it isn't anything new for people working in government, especially those occupying high positions as public officials. To always have the 'communications team' when one speaks to a media person (in her case, Oprah), that's also nothing new. It's to protect the principal, to make sure there's a witness to things said and to have deniability should the principal be falsely quoted. I find it utterly naive for her to be surprised about all these! This arrangement isn't unique to royal life, it's literally how it is for a LOT of public servants.

Then these particular lines, '"We have the ability to make our own choices in a way that I couldn't have said yes to then," she said. "That wasn't my choice to make."' She married Harry, of course that's a choice she made. Unless, as many have said here, she had zero clue what royal life is like. Now I wish she spent a couple of months reading these forums before she got married, she'd have had a wholistic idea of royalty...
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