General News about Frederik, Mary and Family 8: March - May 2011

[mellie]

Originally Posted by Muhler

This is from the family walking at Kastellet.

BB says he was cleanshaven when they went sailing in Copenhagen harbour Sunday.

Thanks Muhler. Look forward to see some pictures then.

[Juliette2]

I read on the Royal Correspondent Blog (a new website for me) that in the past Frederik has been admitted to suffering from depression. Honestly, I had never heard of it. Is there any substance to this claim?

Originally Posted by gerry

we all need to get out once in a while

Well, I have to say that after seeing the video of Frederick at the nightclub dancing with the blond girl I was a bit disappointed. Not by the girl but by the fact that he seemed REALLY drunk! Now, on thing is to go out and have fun (even when your wife is at home with 4 kids...) but getting wasted like that is...bah...irresponsible. Maybe it's just the way I think but I found the video a bit disturbing (for lack of a more tame word!)

[Sternchen]

The word depression was never really mentioned iirc. He said, that he was in a dark mood for a period. But I am sure, that Muhler has some direct quotes, IIRC, it was mentioned in the book for Fred's 40th Birthday?

[Muhler]

Originally Posted by Juliette2

I read on the Royal Correspondent Blog (a new website for me) that in the past Frederik has been admitted to suffering from depression. Honestly, I had never heard of it. Is there any substance to this claim?

Yes, from the horse's own mouth, so to speak.

When he was in his late teens and early to mid twenties, it was very obvious that Frederik was not enthusiastic about the prospect of becoming king and that the royal duties was just that. Duties, not an experience or a pleasure.
It was in that period that many felt Joachim would make a better future king. (Myself included).
Anyway, Frederik was then interviewed (I can't remember by who, was it Bodil Cath?) and in this very personal and frank interview, he talked about how he had big problems getting to terms with the fact that he was destined to become a king. It wasn't the life he really wanted.
That caused a huge debate at the time, and I'd say it was the beginning of turning people's perception of him, from the impression of him being immature and yes, spoiled, to giving people an insight into the sensitive and reflecting personality he has.
One of the things that naturally caused a big stir, because it made good headlines, was that he talked about whether it wouldn't be better "if he ended it all". Everybody who has been down are probably familiar with the thought of suicide going through your mind, but there is a very big leap from that, to actually seriously contemplating suicide and I doubt Frederik ever reached that stage.
So, yes, I'd say he suffered from a depression to at least some extent. Or a lengthy identity or personality crisis, if you will. Whether he is still prone to suffering at least minor depressions, I cannot say.
What is my firm impression is that he in Mary found his mental rock, his mental support. - Just as his grandfather, Frederik IX, found his "rock" in Queen Ingrid.

[missMaryanne]

Originally Posted by Muhler

This is from the family walking at Kastellet.

BB says he was cleanshaven when they went sailing in Copenhagen harbour Sunday.

well, i have to see it to believe it...are there any pics of federik on that sailing day????

[MARG]

Originally Posted by Juliette2

Well, I have to say that after seeing the video of Frederick at the nightclub dancing with the blond girl I was a bit disappointed. Not by the girl but by the fact that he seemed REALLY drunk! Now, on thing is to go out and have fun (even when your wife is at home with 4 kids...) but getting wasted like that is...bah...irresponsible. Maybe it's just the way I think but I found the video a bit disturbing (for lack of a more tame word!)

Okay, we have already discovered that the Nightclub was in fact, hired by Frederik and Mary to entertain their many guests from all over the world.

Frederik, Joachim and Marie picked up the hosting duties as, let's face it, with a house full of kids, a big dinner and breastfeeding twins prior to the morning's Christening, I really don't think Mary would have enjoyed a late night party either at home or at the Nightclub.

So, no moral high ground on that score but on the strength of a few minutes of grainy mobile video with multi-coloured strobe lights flashing you are Disappointed and can tell that Fred was Wasted, Irresponsible and the whole video was Disturbing?

You're darned, right it was disturbing! In that someone violated their privacy at a private function, undoubtedly made a tidy sum of money selling it to the media who have been having a field day inferring Frederik abandoned Mary to go partying (never mind the mysterious "Blonde"), so that credulous people can vilify him at will, without even bothering to verify the facts!

[Muhler]

Originally Posted by missMaryanne

well, i have to see it to believe it...are there any pics of federik on that sailing day????

Yes, from the paper version of Billed Bladet.

Frederik has lost his beard. So depending on how you feel choose the appropriate smiley:

[Juliette2]

Originally Posted by Muhler

Yes, from the horse's own mouth, so to speak.

When he was in his late teens and early to mid twenties, it was very obvious that Frederik was not enthusiastic about the prospect of becoming king and that the royal duties was just that. Duties, not an experience or a pleasure.[...]
So, yes, I'd say he suffered from a depression to at least some extent. Or a lengthy identity or personality crisis, if you will. Whether he is still prone to suffering at least minor depressions, I cannot say.
What is my firm impression is that he in Mary found his mental rock, his mental support. - Just as his grandfather, Frederik IX, found his "rock" in Queen Ingrid.

Muhler - Thank you so much! This was very helpful. I absolutely agree with you in thinking that Mary was instrumental in helping him found some serenity. Lately, however, he seems to be a bit "down," beyond the obvious fatigue due to the twins. In the months preceding their birth he gave the impression of being a bit "lost."

P.S. Maybe "ending it" referred to the possibility of abdicating?

[I edited the quote just to take up less space...!]

Originally Posted by MARG

Okay, we have already discovered that the Nightclub was in fact, hired by Frederik and Mary to entertain their many guests from all over the world.

Frederik, Joachim and Marie picked up the hosting duties as, let's face it, with a house full of kids, a big dinner and breastfeeding twins prior to the morning's Christening, I really don't think Mary would have enjoyed a late night party either at home or at the Nightclub.

So, no moral high ground on that score but on the strength of a few minutes of grainy mobile video with multi-coloured strobe lights flashing you are Disappointed and can tell that Fred was Wasted, Irresponsible and the whole video was Disturbing?

You're darned, right it was disturbing! In that someone violated their privacy at a private function, undoubtedly made a tidy sum of money selling it to the media who have been having a field day inferring Frederik abandoned Mary to go partying (never mind the mysterious "Blonde"), so that credulous people can vilify him at will, without even bothering to verify the facts!

Marg -

1) I didn't know that the nightclub was booked by M&F to entertaining the guests but it makes little difference. I'm just sorry because I guess that it must have been one of their "friends" or a nightclub employee who sold the video.
2) I agree that Mary would have had little desire to spend an evening partying !
3) Even with the grainy images and the lights it really did look like Frederik was quite drunk (loosing his balance for a moment, too) therefore the use of the word "wasted." Anyone getting drunk is "irresponsible" in my opinion. I couldn't find a lighter word instead of "disturbing" and I said so.
4) I agree that it is very sad that his privacy was violated
5) I absolutely disagree with those who think that Frederick "abandoned" Mary to go partying. Obviously, that's rubbish.
6) Again, the fact that he was dancing with a girl (whoever she is I couldn't care less) makes no difference to the opinion I have about drinking too much. I said so.
7) You seem to put a lot of weight on my choice of words but...shouldn't words be a "little wild, for they are assaults of thoughts on the unthinking"?

[Muhler]

Originally Posted by Juliette2

Muhler - Thank you so much! This was very helpful. I absolutely agree with you in thinking that Mary was instrumental in helping him found some serenity. Lately, however, he seems to be a bit "down," beyond the obvious fatigue due to the twins. In the months preceding their birth he gave the impression of being a bit "lost."

P.S. Maybe "ending it" referred to the possibility of abdicating?

[I edited the quote just to take up less space...!]

You are welcome.

No, Frederik referred specifically to ending his own life.
That was mentioned in a long interview and not en passant as such, but almost. Which to me indicates that it wasn't something he considered doing in earnest, not even as a cry for help. More as a thought, and unfortunately not an uncommon thought.

His personal crisis was indeed mentioned in the portrait book, which Sternchen refers to and if there is an interest I may dig up some more. That is when I find the time to do it. The weather is great, so the garden calls.

[missMaryanne]

Originally Posted by Juliette2

Muhler - Thank you so much! This was very helpful. I absolutely agree with you in thinking that Mary was instrumental in helping him found some serenity. Lately, however, he seems to be a bit "down," beyond the obvious fatigue due to the twins. In the months preceding their birth he gave the impression of being a bit "lost."

P.S. Maybe "ending it" referred to the possibility of abdicating?


[I edited the quote just to take up less space...!]

well, the spanish version of that interview says "cuando me miro al espejo y pienso en mi vida, siento tentaciones de quitarmela" ("when i look at myself in the mirror and think about my life, i have a temptation of
taking it off")... i don't know, maybe it's just to sell magazines... anything is possible...

Originally Posted by Muhler

Yes, from the paper version of Billed Bladet.

Frederik has lost his beard. So depending on how you feel choose the appropriate smiley:

i like him with or without beard, that's no problem for me...aren't there any pictures online yet?

that beard, was a promise or something like that? beacase he stopped shaving when he found out mary was pregnant, and after the twins' christening, he decided to shave again...

thanks for answering my question;-)

[Duke of Marmalade]

I agree with what Muhler said earlier about Frederik and his troubled character.

I am sure Mary knows exactly who she is dealing with and that it is part of the package that parts of Frederik are beyond her control so to say. Therefore, what happend with the blonde is not important at all. Mary is Frederiks wife, has 4 children and is very aware and ambitious re her position as CP and future Queen meaning that there is no question that she will put up with any downsides there may be. Frederiks "flaws" are there to stay, only this time the public got to notice and it fits that Danes are not really interested because its Frederik as they know him and he has always been honest about it.

Would be a different matter if Joachim was concerned who, I agree, has more of an image problem than his brother as his perception is very different, not in a positive way.

[Muhler]

Originally Posted by Duke of Marmalade

I agree with what Muhler said earlier about Frederik and his troubled character.

I am sure Mary knows exactly who she is dealing with and that it is part of the package that parts of Frederik are beyond her control so to say. Therefore, what happend with the blonde is not important at all. Mary is Frederiks wife, has 4 children and is very aware and ambitious re her position as CP and future Queen meaning that there is no question that she will put up with any downsides there may be. Frederiks "flaws" are there to stay, only this time the public got to notice and it fits that Danes are not really interested because its Frederik as they know him and he has always been honest about it.

Would be a different matter if Joachim was concerned who, I agree, has more of an image problem than his brother as his perception is very different, not in a positive way.

Eeh, what flaws?

He had serious problems coming to terms or rather accept his predestined role, that is beyond dispute.
He has, as he has matured, accepted his future role and according to what he says himself, he is now ready to do his very best, when his time comes. And indeed he has started. You can say that Mary has gone further, but she is in the position that she is younger, more glamourous and the interest in her as a consequence is much bigger. As a Crown Princess she has also more space to commit herself in various issues, instead of Frederik, who to put it brutally is in a waiting position, before he can put his particular mark on things in earnest.

As for the nightclub. Frederik did nothing wrong in my eyes. The woman has been positively identified as someone he personally know through very close friends indeed. Frederik's friends were present. Mary's brother was present. I cannot imagine he would go to a nightclub with his brother-in-law if Mary would be upset about that.
Palle Hvenegaard, a member of the outer circle of friends who were invited to the afterparty, joked to the journalists when he left and said the: "Frederik has snatched all the blondes". I cannot imagine either that a friend of M&F would crack such a joke if there was anything remotely true in that. You just don't, that would be extremely poor taste. Normally you keep your mouth shut, if you suspect an aquiantace of yours is fooling around.
Now, one of the things where I feel I can relate to Frederik is how he is as a family man. I strongly believe he is a devoted husband and father and should his and Mary's marriage at some point be strained, it will not be because Frederik is fooling around with another women, whether he is under influence of alcohol or not. Period! You just don't do that to the woman you consider your "rock".

Is it appropriate to go to a nightclub, a discreet nightclub at that, when your wife is breastfeeding twins? Yes. Your wife is most likely pretty wasted in the evening and you relieve her by taking care of her family and friends who are visiting. And that can include taking them to town.
What if you get drunk? Well, if you are surrounded by good and genuine friends, you will not be allowed to embarrass yourself. That's the mark of a true friendship.
Is it okay for husband and wives to go to town alone from time to time? I believe so. If my wife and I sat home every night or only went out together, our marriage would slowly die. We need to spend time with our friends from time to time and tell dirty jokes or whatever. We husbands take turn in picking up our wives, and they take turn driving us husbands home as well. Works fine.
My point is: you cannot prevent your husband/wife from having an affair by being with him/her constantly in your sparetime. Nor can you ensure he/she will continue to love you just as much as when you got married, by being together all the time. Forget that.
What's important is the affection and attention you give each other, when you are together. And the trust you show each other, when you are not.
I believe and hope M&F have found a similar balance in their marriage.

[Juliette2]

Originally Posted by Muhler

Eeh, what flaws?

He had serious problems coming to terms or rather accept his predestined role, that is beyond dispute.
He has, as he has matured, accepted his future role and according to what he says himself, he is now ready to do his very best, when his time comes. And indeed he has started. [...]
My point is: you cannot prevent your husband/wife from having an affair by being with him/her constantly in your sparetime. Nor can you ensure he/she will continue to love you just as much as when you got married, by being together all the time. Forget that.
What's important is the affection and attention you give each other, when you are together. And the trust you show each other, when you are not.
I believe and hope M&F have found a similar balance in their marriage.

Muhler: You are so WISE!!!! Great post.

About the issue of depression, it is a topic that interests me personally and although I've always thought that Frederick is a vulnerable and sensitive man, I was not aware of his difficulties. But I think that it's good that he was open about it. Many consider his role a privileged one, but it can certainly be stressful to be "forced" into a role you have not chosen. It also reminds me of the difficulties Princess Victoria had when she was younger with eating disorders. It is not an easy place to be.

[Frelinghighness]

Thank you Muhler and Juliette for your wise posts.

[iceflower]

__________________


Here's the BB online article about the walk the day after the christening:


** Billeder: Mary på spadseretur med familie og venner ** translation **

[dazzling]

Originally Posted by iceflower

__________________


Here's the BB online article about the walk the day after the christening:


** Billeder: Mary på spadseretur med familie og venner ** translation **

Thanks for the links, it looked like a nice day and they did some sightings with the family & friends. Its nice to see them together taking pictures and hanging out. Mary & Patricia look so much alike.

[dazzling]

All posts on the Royal family series has been move to the
Danish TV series "The Monarchy Inside" by DR
thread

[Carminha Stalker]

I sincerely hope that CP Frederick is not an irresponsible husband and father. That he is truthful and still in love with his wife and proud of his four lovely children.However, it´s not the first time one reads about his "absences".If it´s true or not that he was dancing with a blonde, one thing is for sure, his lovely wife does not deserve this kind of thing. As a matter of fact, No wife deserves this kind of attitude.

[Muhler]

Originally Posted by Carminha Stalker

I sincerely hope that CP Frederick is not an irresponsible husband and father. That he is truthful and still in love with his wife and proud of his four lovely children.However, it´s not the first time one reads about his "absences".If it´s true or not that he was dancing with a blonde, one thing is for sure, his lovely wife does not deserve this kind of thing. As a matter of fact, No wife deserves this kind of attitude.

That your husband is in a nightclub with your own brother and some of your friends? And that he is dancing (if you can call that dancing) with someone you know, who also happens to be a personal friend of some of your best friends?

If that is a major issue for Mary, she would have been better off marrying a monk.

Try turn the table around.
Mary is photographed in say three months from now in a nightclub a few days before a major event in the DRF. Seemingly dancing with a young blonde man, who happens to be a friend of say Caroline and Peter Heering. In the precense of friends and with Joachim present as well.
Frederik is at home with the children.

How many of you would feel that's no way to treat a husband? Or even raise an eyebrow?

[antonieta]

Originally Posted by Muhler

That your husband is in a nightclub with your own brother and some of your friends? And that he is dancing (if you can call that dancing) with someone you know, who also happens to be a personal friend of some of your best friends?

If that is a major issue for Mary, she would have been better off marrying a monk.

Try turn the table around.
Mary is photographed in say three months from now in a nightclub a few days before a major event in the DRF. Seemingly dancing with a young blonde man, who happens to be a friend of say Caroline and Peter Heering. In the precense of friends and with Joachim present as well.
Frederik is at home with the children.

How many of you would feel that's no way to treat a husband? Or even raise an eyebrow?

In my own opinion, the reaction would be the same,
Obligations, duties, responsabilities, call it what you want, are equal, no matter if the person in question is a prince, or a princess, an anonimous...it's equall.