The Duke & Duchess of Sussex and Family, News and Events 4: April-June 2021


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I think Katie makes good points...

"I think it's inevitable that every time Harry speaks out about personal family relationships, it is going to be damaging to the healing of this rift, particularly between William and Harry," she says. "I think there is a desire on the part of both of the brothers to move on, to try and heal this relationship. The problem is, when Harry sits down and gives a really personal interview like this... it really does set back that healing process."

....

"... I think there's a feeling over here in the U.K [that] no one has a problem with Prince Harry talking about mental health. I think most people think it's an important campaign [and that] raising awareness about it can only be a good thing... but a lot of people here think Prince Harry has overstepped a mark in talking so personally about his father, and his relationship with his father, in what most people have interpreted to be quite a critical way."

Nicholl adds that the perception of Harry's comments is different in the U.K. and the U.S. "I think certainly stateside there is a lot more sympathy for Prince Harry than there is here over in the U.K.," she says.

While it's unclear if Harry has spoken to members of the royal family since the podcast aired, Nicholl believes that the duke's comments may slow the progress of any reconciliation.

"I think it goes without saying that clearly some of the things that he has raised in this podcast have been hurtful to the royal family, I think particularly for the queen and Prince Charles, who are very private when it comes to their personal emotions," Nicholl says. "This idea of Harry venting, airing publicly, his private grievances is going to be problematic."

https://www.etonline.com/how-the-ro...ruman-show-comments-according-to-royal-expert
 
I listened to the podcast in full and encourage others to do so.

For me the biggest takeaway from this interview was that we can understand that whatever Harry says during his interviews, podcasts, promotions, whatever, it is not grounded in truth or even "his truth," it is grounded in whatever he needs to say to suit the message of whatever program he's on/ whatever he is trying to get across personally or for his next project. I think it is unfair to jump on everything this couple says to prove they are "lying" because no one remembers everything from their own past perfectly and recollections differ with time, but it is clear between this and the Oprah interview that Harry is telling stories to suit "the moment" and banking on the (true) hope that most people have not "followed" him long enough to realize it.

This was the most bizarre moment for me:

Dax: "What was the moment for you that led you to therapy- what was your 'moment at the bar'?"

Harry: "It was" (pausing to think) "A conversation I had with my now wife. And she saw it, she saw it straight away. She could tell that I was hurting...."

[I cannot be the only one who was stunned when this came out of his mouth.]

And in response to encouraging others to enter therapy: "Rule No. 1 is that when you actually want or feel as though someone needs help, telling them to their face ‘you need help’ is probably the best way for them to go ‘uhhh no, no I don’t."

Yet in 2017, Harry bravely and famously said that he sought therapy not only at the urging of his brother, but because his brother employed the exact method described above- repeatedly told him to his face that he needed help, something was not right, and would not take no for an answer.

So while it may be well be true that Meghan helped Harry to realize that he had particular issues to work through in therapy and urged him to do so (I applaud her for this), it is completely untrue that a "conversation with his wife" was the lightbulb moment that made him realize he needed therapy. According to him, he had successfully undergone years of therapy already due to being "told to his face" by the brother he has recently described in quite unfavorable terms. I daresay this would not have "sold" quite as well as a soundbite.

There are many other things to unpack from this podcast, but I think it all boils down to the above. I am guessing these inconsistencies come down to being on message/ on brand for his upcoming program with Oprah, and the stories will change again when necessary. (Although they may not, because he now has a massively larger audience watching that would notice.)

I will add only this: The conversation was flowing very naturally about something utterly unrelated when the co-host frog-horned in: "Let's talk about parenting really quickly." The setup was so obvious I might have physically cringed. Things like this are why I encourage everyone to listen to the full thing. In answering about the now quoted-round-the-world genetic trauma, Harry slipped in that he discusses this "at length" in his upcoming programming with Oprah. It changed my perspective on his answer to know that the entire thing was part of a teed-up response for the program.
 
Harry said very little about his grandparents’ parenting that hasn’t been said before by his father. I think Harry was speaking within Mental Health Week about how disfunction within families can occur generation after generation and that sometimes that cycle just has to be stopped by going away, trying a different way of parenting, of family life that isn’t led in a system that can be inimical to relationships.
 
I listened to the podcast in full and encourage others to do so.

For me the biggest takeaway from this interview was that we can understand that whatever Harry says during his interviews, podcasts, promotions, whatever, it is not grounded in truth or even "his truth," it is grounded in whatever he needs to say to suit the message of whatever program he's on/ whatever he is trying to get across personally or for his next project. I think it is unfair to jump on everything this couple says to prove they are "lying" because no one remembers everything from their own past perfectly and recollections differ with time, but it is clear between this and the Oprah interview that Harry is telling stories to suit "the moment" and banking on the (true) hope that most people have not "followed" him long enough to realize it.

This was the most bizarre moment for me:

Dax: "What was the moment for you that led you to therapy- what was your 'moment at the bar'?"

Harry: "It was" (pausing to think) "A conversation I had with my now wife. And she saw it, she saw it straight away. She could tell that I was hurting...."

[I cannot be the only one who was stunned when this came out of his mouth.]


I agree with this post.

It's heartbreaking that his personal feelings about his family are his new currency in Hollywood and the media. I think that BP will take a long view and wait it out until interest in him wanes, the money dries up, and he can't come up with any more content. His only content now is therapy-speak and support for his wife's hectoring about compassion communities and lenses.
 
I agree with this post.

It's heartbreaking that his personal feelings about his family are his new currency in Hollywood and the media. I think that BP will take a long view and wait it out until interest in him wanes, the money dries up, and he can't come up with any more content. His only content now is therapy-speak and support for his wife's hectoring about compassion communities and lenses.

That's all they really can do at this point, apart from ending all personal contact. If the Angela Levin report is true and Harry & Meghan really are planning a tell-all with video from "behind the palace walls" and even some conversations, they're going to eventually have nothing left to reveal. Assuming BP is able to ride out the storm, they'll endure and interest in the Sussex branch will wane, even from Hollywood & the media. They're using the Sussexes to make money and I doubt much of it will find its way to the Sussex bank accounts in the end.
 
Angela Levin hasn’t spoken to Harry since 2018 when she wrote a biography of him, and has been an unceasing critic of Meghan since she married Harry. I doubt very very much that Levin has any inside information about what sort of broadcasts the Sussexes will be doing next.

In this article Harry talks about William telling him to seek therapy years ago when he felt bad before public engagements. Nowhere here does Harry state that his brother ‘repeatedly and to his face’ told him to seek therapy. He says in quotes that William ‘and others encouraged him to ‘seek help, saying what you are feeling is not right’. That’s hardly telling him repeatedly to his face.


https://www.vanityfair.com/style/20...nt-to-therapy-to-process-princess-diana-death


We don’t know whether Harry did seek therapy on that occasion, or if he did that it lasted long enough. Meghan must have picked up on the unresolved issues.
 
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I listened to the podcast in full and encourage others to do so.

For me the biggest takeaway from this interview was that we can understand that whatever Harry says during his interviews, podcasts, promotions, whatever, it is not grounded in truth or even "his truth," it is grounded in whatever he needs to say to suit the message of whatever program he's on/ whatever he is trying to get across personally or for his next project. I think it is unfair to jump on everything this couple says to prove they are "lying" because no one remembers everything from their own past perfectly and recollections differ with time, but it is clear between this and the Oprah interview that Harry is telling stories to suit "the moment" and banking on the (true) hope that most people have not "followed" him long enough to realize it.

This was the most bizarre moment for me:

Dax: "What was the moment for you that led you to therapy- what was your 'moment at the bar'?"

Harry: "It was" (pausing to think) "A conversation I had with my now wife. And she saw it, she saw it straight away. She could tell that I was hurting...."

[I cannot be the only one who was stunned when this came out of his mouth.]

And in response to encouraging others to enter therapy: "Rule No. 1 is that when you actually want or feel as though someone needs help, telling them to their face ‘you need help’ is probably the best way for them to go ‘uhhh no, no I don’t."

Yet in 2017, Harry bravely and famously said that he sought therapy not only at the urging of his brother, but because his brother employed the exact method described above- repeatedly told him to his face that he needed help, something was not right, and would not take no for an answer.

So while it may be well be true that Meghan helped Harry to realize that he had particular issues to work through in therapy and urged him to do so (I applaud her for this), it is completely untrue that a "conversation with his wife" was the lightbulb moment that made him realize he needed therapy. According to him, he had successfully undergone years of therapy already due to being "told to his face" by the brother he has recently described in quite unfavorable terms. I daresay this would not have "sold" quite as well as a soundbite.

There are many other things to unpack from this podcast, but I think it all boils down to the above. I am guessing these inconsistencies come down to being on message/ on brand for his upcoming program with Oprah, and the stories will change again when necessary. (Although they may not, because he now has a massively larger audience watching that would notice.)

I will add only this: The conversation was flowing very naturally about something utterly unrelated when the co-host frog-horned in: "Let's talk about parenting really quickly." The setup was so obvious I might have physically cringed. Things like this are why I encourage everyone to listen to the full thing. In answering about the now quoted-round-the-world genetic trauma, Harry slipped in that he discusses this "at length" in his upcoming programming with Oprah. It changed my perspective on his answer to know that the entire thing was part of a teed-up response for the program.

It’s marketing, but it’s backed up by a good deal of genuine bitterness and instability.

The problem is this mess of a man is being held up by some as an example of a person who has successfully learned to manage mental health issues.

Harry can afford to do all the wrong things for a great deal longer than the average person. He’s not doing himself any favours in the long run, but he’s always going to be cushioned from the most severe potential consequences faced by mentally vulnerable people who don’t have his resources. It’s not like Archie will wind up in foster care even if his father crashes and burns ten times over. For other people who don’t have financial security, supportive friends and a stable family waiting in the wings it can get that bad and worse.

It’s not surprising that Oprah is involved in trying to turn Harry’s problematic behaviours into some evidence of wisdom or even authority - this is the woman who gave the world Dr. Phil, after all. But it is unfortunate that there are people out there who may get hurt as a result.
 
In this article Harry talks about William telling him to seek therapy years ago when he felt bad before public engagements. Nowhere here does Harry state that his brother ‘repeatedly and to his face told him to seek therapy. He says in quotes that William ‘and others encouraged him to ‘seek help, saying what you are feeling is not right’. That’s hardly telling him repeatedly to his face.


https://www.vanityfair.com/style/20...nt-to-therapy-to-process-princess-diana-death


We don’t know whether Harry did seek therapy on that occasion, or if he did that it lasted long enough. Meghan must have picked up on the unresolved issues.

Here’s a longer quote where he talks about William telling him to seek help and also a quote about how the therapy changed his life.

He turned to counseling upon the advice of his brother, Prince William. "It's all about timing. And for me personally, my brother, you know, bless him, he was a huge support to me. He kept saying, 'this is not right, this is not normal, you need to talk to [someone] about stuff, it's OK,'" he said.

"Because of the process I have been through over the past two and a half years, I've now been able to take my work seriously, been able to take my private life seriously as well, and been able to put blood, sweat and tears into the things that really make a difference and things that I think will make a difference to everybody else."

Source
 
I listened to the podcast in full and encourage others to do so.

For me the biggest takeaway from this interview was that we can understand that whatever Harry says during his interviews, podcasts, promotions, whatever, it is not grounded in truth or even "his truth," it is grounded in whatever he needs to say to suit the message of whatever program he's on/ whatever he is trying to get across personally or for his next project. I think it is unfair to jump on everything this couple says to prove they are "lying" because no one remembers everything from their own past perfectly and recollections differ with time, but it is clear between this and the Oprah interview that Harry is telling stories to suit "the moment" and banking on the (true) hope that most people have not "followed" him long enough to realize it.

This was the most bizarre moment for me:

Dax: "What was the moment for you that led you to therapy- what was your 'moment at the bar'?"

Harry: "It was" (pausing to think) "A conversation I had with my now wife. And she saw it, she saw it straight away. She could tell that I was hurting...."

[I cannot be the only one who was stunned when this came out of his mouth.]

And in response to encouraging others to enter therapy: "Rule No. 1 is that when you actually want or feel as though someone needs help, telling them to their face ‘you need help’ is probably the best way for them to go ‘uhhh no, no I don’t."

Yet in 2017, Harry bravely and famously said that he sought therapy not only at the urging of his brother, but because his brother employed the exact method described above- repeatedly told him to his face that he needed help, something was not right, and would not take no for an answer.

So while it may be well be true that Meghan helped Harry to realize that he had particular issues to work through in therapy and urged him to do so (I applaud her for this), it is completely untrue that a "conversation with his wife" was the lightbulb moment that made him realize he needed therapy. According to him, he had successfully undergone years of therapy already due to being "told to his face" by the brother he has recently described in quite unfavorable terms. I daresay this would not have "sold" quite as well as a soundbite.

There are many other things to unpack from this podcast, but I think it all boils down to the above. I am guessing these inconsistencies come down to being on message/ on brand for his upcoming program with Oprah, and the stories will change again when necessary. (Although they may not, because he now has a massively larger audience watching that would notice.)

I will add only this: The conversation was flowing very naturally about something utterly unrelated when the co-host frog-horned in: "Let's talk about parenting really quickly." The setup was so obvious I might have physically cringed. Things like this are why I encourage everyone to listen to the full thing. In answering about the now quoted-round-the-world genetic trauma, Harry slipped in that he discusses this "at length" in his upcoming programming with Oprah. It changed my perspective on his answer to know that the entire thing was part of a teed-up response for the program.

Is he saying that Meghan encouraged him to successfully seek therapy but yet they were not able to get therapy when she was suicidal? Wouldn’t Harry have just gotten in touch which his therapist and told them about his wife’s struggles? Or was that just another lie the told Oprah?
 
The Duke & Duchess of Sussex and Family, News and Events 4: April 2021 -

It’s marketing, but it’s backed up by a good deal of genuine bitterness and instability.



The problem is this mess of a man is being held up by some as an example of a person who has successfully learned to manage mental health issues.


Agreed.

I’ve found that problematic too. Harry is not- to me- a success story. That’s not how he’s coming across publicly anyway IMO. If he was- we wouldn’t be hearing him lash out repeatedly IMO.

There are ways to talk about not repeating past mistakes- and William is a good example of someone who has done it- without being hurtful and bringing up past pain so directly. Unless- of course- that’s part of the goal.
 
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Agreed.

I’ve found that problematic too. Harry is not- to me- a success story. That’s not how he’s coming across. If he was- we wouldn’t be hearing him lash out repeatedly IMO.

There are ways to talk about not repeating past mistakes- and William is a good example of someone who has done it- without being hurtful and bringing up past pain so directly. Unless- of course- that’s part of the goal.

To be fair, William has been resentful of his father as well, and has no doubt hurt Charles, even if not publicly. Of course, just like with Charles and Philip, it doesn’t mean that William didn’t love his father....I think the big difference is that he didn’t deliberately set out to publicly humiliate his father, nor damage him in the public eye. Maybe he’s naturally more mature than Harry, maybe it’s being married to such a solid woman - who I see as a healer- with a loving family, but I agree that William overall has dealt with his issues as well as can be expected. I think it helps that Charles does understand why his sons may have had complicated feelings to him given all that’s happened, and he seems to just have let them feel as they do without pressuring them. Charles is showing Harry unconditional love, and I hope Harry will understand that one day, but if he keeps on as is, I hold little hope of a reconciliation
 
To be fair, William has been resentful of his father as well, and has no doubt hurt Charles, even if not publicly. Of course, just like with Charles and Philip, it doesn’t mean that William didn’t love his father....I think the big difference is that he didn’t deliberately set out to publicly humiliate his father, nor damage him in the public eye. Maybe he’s naturally more mature than Harry, maybe it’s being married to such a solid woman - who I see as a healer- with a loving family, but I agree that William overall has dealt with his issues as well as can be expected.


Agreed. I was really only addressing William’s behavior in public versus Harry’s.
 


She might make them, but we all know that Katie Nicholls is not a reliable source, that tabloids are spinning stories, mostly out of Royals percieved hurt, that this is what Harry has always hated - and still a lot of people treat this as the truth?


We have no idea what Charles thinks about his son who obviously is trying to get a grip on his life now that he has his own family (and not necessarily on his Royal life, just the parts of the past that resulted in deep hurt and anger).


Harry is the second son, so the monarchy is not in danger. Charles, just like Harry, has deep understanding how the papers work and the queen wants to understand what made life so terrible for a loved grandson. Both are compassionate people whose life has been dictated by duty - I could understand if they try to hear what Harry is telling.


William follows the way his birthright and the duty of it needs him to follow, he has found a wife who can live this life and support him and maybe (hopefully so) Charlotte and Louis will have different options once they are adults. But still there is the fact that when the children have some problems and someone is telling on them, everything will be splashed out in the papers for the whole world to know. Quite a daunting thing to know.


Harry is now in a position where the papers can write about him without having to resort to silently payed "sources". Though they do, of course. But anyone can go and listen to this podcast, we will all be able to watch documentaries that of course tells his side. But I'd like to listen to him rather than read what the papers say, because, as Harry said, they are complicit with the institutions of the monarchy and see Harry as a public enemy rather than an unhappy family member.


If you like what Harry has to say, if you pity him or his family because of him, if you enjoy his development or are sad or even frightened by what his telling might endanger in the Uk: it doesn't matter. Harry has decided that telling his story might help others cope with their own hurts, he uses his freedom of speech to openly tell about his emotions and what has happened to him (which includes the interactions with his family). Some of it might hurt Charles as Harry's father but I think we as the public audience, should better forget that this is about "The Royal family" but just about a family we are interested in.Harry talks about Charles, his father and the way he was raised and how that led to the way he raised his son Harry. That can lead to all kind of discussions about the way to deal with kids, but should not (IMHO) lead to a discussion about HRH The Prince of Wales and his hurts etc. Harry has a deeply-rooted problem with his father, he does not want to have one with his son and daughter. But it is all about that, about a son having problems with the way he was raised by his father and others, it's not about how HRH The Duke of Sussex feels about HRH THe Prince of Wales in the context of the British monarchy.
 
Angela Levin hasn’t spoken to Harry since 2018 when she wrote a biography of him, and has been an unceasing critic of Meghan since she married Harry. I doubt very very much that Levin has any inside information about what sort of broadcasts the Sussexes will be doing next.

In this article Harry talks about William telling him to seek therapy years ago when he felt bad before public engagements. Nowhere here does Harry state that his brother ‘repeatedly and to his face’ told him to seek therapy. He says in quotes that William ‘and others encouraged him to ‘seek help, saying what you are feeling is not right’. That’s hardly telling him repeatedly to his face.


https://www.vanityfair.com/style/20...nt-to-therapy-to-process-princess-diana-death


We don’t know whether Harry did seek therapy on that occasion, or if he did that it lasted long enough. Meghan must have picked up on the unresolved issues.


Angela levin has been very careful in saying that Harry and Meghan "might" do this and that, like including videos of "places" and then she says even more diffuse that there "could" be "even conversations" in a documentary. And I want to follow that with the idea that Harry "might even" jump naked in his swimming pool or "might" show himself having sexual intercourse with his wife an you can all come and cry that you can't believe me (and you shouldn't) but then: why do you believe one word by Angela Levin or Katie Nicholl or Piers Morgan or whoever?? They "might" know something but they won't use it to tell you as their readers the truth but to stir up conflict in order to sell tomorrows papers. Nothing else.


And could we at least try to listen to Harry for the chance that what he experienced could help us, too instead of dithering for scandalous tidbits about Royal life???
 
Angela levin has been very careful in saying that Harry and Meghan "might" do this and that, like including videos of "places" and then she says even more diffuse that there "could" be "even conversations" in a documentary. And I want to follow that with the idea that Harry "might even" jump naked in his swimming pool or "might" show himself having sexual intercourse with his wife an you can all come and cry that you can't believe me (and you shouldn't) but then: why do you believe one word by Angela Levin or Katie Nicholl or Piers Morgan or whoever?? They "might" know something but they won't use it to tell you as their readers the truth but to stir up conflict in order to sell tomorrows papers. Nothing else.


And could we at least try to listen to Harry for the chance that what he experienced could help us, too instead of dithering for scandalous tidbits about Royal life???

I think most of us are looking at Harry's direct quotes. He needs a Scandal template to pay the bills.

There is nothing Harry can possibly say that will help me or anyone I know, outside of absorbing his woke-speak through an entertainment "lens"
 
For me, the bad taste is that Harry and Meghan want to make a career out of all this, talking about deeply personal matters in public.
Harry could have left the BRF and dealt with his shortcomings in private and quietly. Yes, you can speak about your mental health in public and encourage other people to address their problems but you don't need to discuss every detail in podcasts or in high profile interviews.
Your freedom ends when you enter the other people's freedom. To mention other people, like Kate or Charles or the grandparents, what they have done or not done, is trash talking, pure and simple. Even worse, when you do it in order to get money or attention of an audience you want to use for paying for your lifestyle in the long run.
Nobody's family is perfect, especially parents, but in most cases they do their best or have best intentions.
In the long run, it won't end well, I am sure.
 
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The feeling that one is trapped in The Truman Show as well exposed in the Zoo seems a honest and pretty accurate description of what life is like for a senior member of the royal family.

The quite mild little criticism is that his grandparents and his father made him "get on with it Harry, it is as it is" while he probably thought that being in the Truman Show + the Zoo for the rest of his life is a horror scenario.

On itself there is nothing wrong with acknowledging this. In no any way he was attacking anyone. Just his resumé of royal life.
 
The feeling that one is trapped in The Truman Show as well exposed in the Zoo seems a honest and pretty accurate description of what life is like for a senior member of the royal family.

The quite mild little criticism is that his grandparents and his father made him "get on with it Harry, it is as it is" while he probably thought that being in the Truman Show + the Zoo for the rest of his life is a horror scenario.

On itself there is nothing wrong with acknowledging this. In no any way he was attacking anyone. Just his resumé of royal life.

Mild criticism? I don't think it was from his own quotes "breaking the cycle of genetic pain" seems very loaded and his own previous bitterness on Oprah. It wasn't meant to be mild and doesn't take into account Charles actually doing different things like sending him to a different school and trying to get him to go to therapy and taking him to a rehab centre when he was caught doing weed. Clearly he made mistakes and was often busy but I don't think he deserves this (after he closed the bank of Dad) in public. He also came to regret the Dimbleby interview and Harry is following down that unwise path they both took.

I think Royal life can be a Zoo but I don't see how their new life isn't as well. We used to go months without an interview or quote from PH and rarely saw him in between engagements, now he's everywhere talking about A) how much he doesn't like his family and B) how much he doesn't like the media. Which seems like a torturous way to make money to me.

He said he was doing this to help other people, which is how they justify a lot of things, but I don't think it's going to help anyone, especially him. He's yet again not taking any responsibility for his own actions, either.

Has he really "broken the cycle"? He's currently estranged from his family and Meghan is estranged from most of hers and they seem fairly isolated. And he doesn't sound happy, he sounds like he not only can't let it go, that he's actively finding more reasons to be angry and then monetizing them. Not to mention when it's convenient it's now Meghan than convinced him to go to therapy for his anger not his brother many years ago. William also seems like he changed the way he's raising his kids from how he was raised and trying to get Charles more involved as a grandfather and these things are public but without breaking family privacy.

And lets not forget him calling free speech "bonkers". The US Constitution was written specifically to break with the UK and the Monarchy.

I was also not impressed that he admitted to not liking royal engagement visits with people who were much less advantaged than him but were "free" because they weren't royal. I'm sure many don't find them fascinating at all times but come on, you didn't do hundreds for no recognition like many members of the family.

He was asked if he felt like he was in a "cage" while in his royal duties, having to make his way around the Commonwealth comforting others with a smile on his face, while he himself was also going through a rough time.

"It's the job right? Grin and bear it. Get on with it. I was in my early twenties and I was thinking I don't want this job, I don't want to be here," Prince Harry said. "I don't want to be doing this.'

Penny Junor has a good article in The Times:

So, although it was not the happiest of childhoods, Harry was never abused; he always had a roof over his head, clothes to keep him warm; he never had to wonder where the next meal would come from; and he had the best education money could buy. He had luxurious holidays and beautiful horses to ride. And most important of all, Harry was loved. He was loved by his mother, his father, his brother, his aunts and uncles, and his grandparents. He also had stable and loving nannies. He was surrounded by love. And love is infinitely more valuable than money, privilege or fame.

https://archive.ph/cjfbc
 
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I

For me the biggest takeaway from this interview was that we can understand that whatever Harry says during his interviews, podcasts, promotions, whatever, it is not grounded in truth or even "his truth," it is grounded in whatever he needs to say to suit the message of whatever program he's on/ whatever he is trying to get across personally or for his next project. I think it is unfair to jump on everything this couple says to prove they are "lying" because no one remembers everything from their own past perfectly and recollections differ with time, but it is clear between this and the Oprah interview that Harry is telling stories to suit "the moment" and banking on the (true) hope that most people have not "followed" him long enough to realize it.

Very true. But everyone in the UK's "followed" Harry since the moment it was announced that Charles and Diana were expecting their second child, but he's only interested in the American market now, and that seems to be exactly how he sees the American public - as a market. Nothing he says even makes sense. You can't actually have "genetic pain" unless you've inherited a medical condition!

There are people whose lives have been made hell by their families because they've been physically or sexually abused, because their families have refused to accept that they are gay or transgender, or because they've been submitted to mental cruelty and made to feel that they're worthless. I can understand people who've suffered any of those things criticising them in public. But what exactly is Harry supposed to have "suffered" that's so bad that it justifies saying things like this, especially when his grandfather has just died, and his 95-year-old grandmother, who keeps saying that he's a much-loved member of her family, is grieving?

And if he didn't want to be a working Royal in his 20s - when he wasn't a working Royal anyway, because he was in the Army - then why didn't he do anything about it then?


Everyone comes from somewhere, no-one asks to be born into any particular situation, and all families deal with the situations that they're in. If Harry had been born into a very poor family and had had to struggle for that reason, would he be saying that it was the fault of his parents and grandparents and that it was all about "genetic pain" ... I'm just thinking Tracy Chapman singing "Fast Car" now.
 
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Very true. But everyone in the UK's "followed" Harry since the moment it was announced that Charles and Diana were expecting their second child, but he's only interested in the American market now, and that seems to be exactly how he sees the American public - as a market. Nothing he says even makes sense. You can't actually have "genetic pain" unless you've inherited a medical condition!

There are people whose lives have been made hell by their families because they've been physically or sexually abused, because their families have refused to accept that they are gay or transgender, or because they've been submitted to mental cruelty and made to feel that they're worthless. I can understand people who've suffered any of those things criticising them in public. But what exactly is Harry supposed to have "suffered" that's so bad that it justifies saying things like this, especially when his grandfather has just died, and his 95-year-old grandmother, who keeps saying that he's a much-loved member of her family, is grieving?

And if he didn't want to be a working Royal in his 20s - when he wasn't a working Royal anyway, because he was in the Army - then why didn't he do anything about it then?


Everyone comes from somewhere, no-one asks to be born into any particular situation, and all families deal with the situations that they're in. If Harry had been born into a very poor family and had had to struggle for that reason, would he be saying that it was the fault of his parents and grandparents and that it was all about "genetic pain" ... I'm just thinking Tracy Chapman singing "Fast Car" now.

To be fair, if he left the royal family at that time, how would he make money? It's also interesting how he seems to have no problem with the PERKS of royalty with all those skiing holidays and going to safaris in Africa.
 
To be fair, if he left the royal family at that time, how would he make money? It's also interesting how he seems to have no problem with the PERKS of royalty with all those skiing holidays and going to safaris in Africa.

If he had been determined to leave, I'm sure the RF would have come to some arrangement. He could have gone on with his army career, Charles would have helped out financially....If he had stayed in the UK and the army, security would have been cheaper - nad possibly in later life, Charles might have given him an estate to retire to..
 
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Mild criticism? I don't think it was from his own quotes "breaking the cycle of genetic pain" seems very loaded and his own previous bitterness on Oprah. It wasn't meant to be mild and doesn't take into account Charles actually doing different things like sending him to a different school and trying to get him to go to therapy and taking him to a rehab centre when he was caught doing weed. Clearly he made mistakes and was often busy but I don't think he deserves this (after he closed the bank of Dad) in public. He also came to regret the Dimbleby interview and Harry is following down that unwise path they both took.

I think Royal life can be a Zoo but I don't see how their new life isn't as well. We used to go months without an interview or quote from PH and rarely saw him in between engagements, now he's everywhere talking about A) how much he doesn't like his family and B) how much he doesn't like the media. Which seems like a torturous way to make money to me.

He said he was doing this to help other people, which is how they justify a lot of things, but I don't think it's going to help anyone, especially him. He's yet again not taking any responsibility for his own actions, either.

Has he really "broken the cycle"? He's currently estranged from his family and Meghan is estranged from most of hers and they seem fairly isolated. And he doesn't sound happy, he sounds like he not only can't let it go, that he's actively finding more reasons to be angry and then monetizing them. Not to mention when it's convenient it's now Meghan than convinced him to go to therapy for his anger not his brother many years ago. William also seems like he changed the way he's raising his kids from how he was raised and trying to get Charles more involved as a grandfather and these things are public but without breaking family privacy.

And lets not forget him calling free speech "bonkers". The US Constitution was written specifically to break with the UK and the Monarchy.

I was also not impressed that he admitted to not liking royal engagement visits with people who were much less advantaged than him but were "free" because they weren't royal. I'm sure many don't find them fascinating at all times but come on, you didn't do hundreds for no recognition like many members of the family.



Penny Junor has a good article in The Times:



https://archive.ph/cjfbc

Very well said.

By no means was this mild criticism - this is less a bomb that Harry threw than daggers, specifically meaning to damn his father and grandparents. He literally said he escaped to America to “break the cycle”, a term associated with abuse, to make sure he didn’t raise his son the same way. Of course he still wanted his father to dole out the big bucks...so was Harry implying that if Charles hadn’t “cut him off”, he would have been ok with how he felt he was treated ? If Charles had continued to fund Harry in order to keep him happy, would Harry have spoken out? I don’t think so - he very pointedly spoke about being “cut off”, wanting the world to know about how his father had done him wrong.

Charles parented how he knew, which means that, as much as he loved his sons, he was a “workaholic” and may not have realized how much William and Harry needed him to be even more present than he was. William mentioned in the Charles at 70 special that he was a “brilliant” grandfather, and the kids - well, the entire family- wanted to see more of him. I suspect he even mentioned that in private, and based on reports, Charles has made the effort, which is paying off in his renewed closeness with W and his very clearly loving relationship with Kate and the children.

Harry seems to me to be running away from his problems, not dealing either them. I believe he equates money and position with love, since much of his anger seems to stem from not getting what he wanted (his and Meghan’s own “court”, more money, etc..). I recognize that as insecurity - being insecure myself. That’s not a bad thing, but then why not actually talk to his father about it, especially if he wanted to “break the cycle” ? Does he intend never to try and have a relationship with Charles again ? Like Meghan doesn’t have with Thomas ?

I have to also wonder why Harry and Meghan wanted initially to be half in/half out if H was so keen since his 20’s to leave the life entirely ? I think not getting what they wanted triggered this plan to “Escape to Another Country”, and everything follows from that: the bombshell exit, the book, openly supporting the Crown (tantamount to agreeing that their portrayal of Charles as the villain is the truth), the interview, the podcast...some new series with Oprah, etc...In all this, H is pushing the narrative that Diana was the perfect mother, and Charles a bad father...



I read the Junor article earlier...agree, good piece.
 
To be fair, if he left the royal family at that time, how would he make money? It's also interesting how he seems to have no problem with the PERKS of royalty with all those skiing holidays and going to safaris in Africa.

That's not a specifically royal problem though and he had more opportunities than others. Lots of people have to figure out what they're going to do if they don't want to work in the family business.

He could have stayed in the army and it was reported at the time that his father and family would be quite happy if he was a career soldier and were surprised when he quit.

He could gone to Africa for several years working for charities. Zara went to Australia for a few months when her eventing career was stalling because of injury and her relationship collapsed (and she met Mike there).

He could have taken over a farm, (heh) or retrained as a commercial pilot or retrained as anything else - there are programmes for ex servicemembers or even just lived on his inheritance. It seems like Charles might have bankrolled him if he stayed in the UK. Plenty of his cousins and other non heirs work.

Sure there would have been restrictions, upsets and public grumbling but he wasn't forced into being a full time working royal and he wasn't until he turned 30 anyway and in the beginning was carrying out 100 engagements or less per year and placing below the Gloucesters and Kents not to mention his own grandparents, father and aunts and uncles.
 
If he had been determined to leave, I'm sure the RF would have come to some arrangement. He could have gone on with his army career, Charles would have helped out financially....If he had stayed in the UK and the army, security would have been cheaper - nad possibly in later life, Charles might have given him an estate to retire to..

That is true but I think he simply felt tie-wrapped in royal life. It is difficult for outsiders to feel what he (or William) feels. I still remember the deafening screams of wild teenage girls, almost fainting when seeing William or Harry. As if they were Michael Jackson. And why? Because they were the sons of "England's Rose"? I remember the sight of these wild screaming hoards simply scared me.

The confusing fact here is that Harry does not -alike his European peers- engage into something anonymous as being an investment banker or to have a seat in the Board of a Unilever or BP (probably because his education is insufficient) but exactly chooses for the floodlights of Hollywood, that is what baffles me.

The Prince of Wales could have given him a senior position in the management of the Duchy of Cornwall, in the upkeep of Highgrove. But it is probably not his (and Meghan's) aspriration to be buried into British countryside.

But that a royal prefers a life outside the royal family, that must be open for consideration and indeed always a possibility. It should not be a taboo or "treason" to opt out of royal life.
 
But that a royal prefers a life outside the royal family, that must be open for consideration and indeed always a possibility. It should not be a taboo or "treason" to opt out of royal life.
Yes but Harry wanted the best of both worlds, what is not possible. Either you leave with all consequences, or you don't. What you can't do in any case is bite the hand that feeds you.
 
I am happy that Harry is speaking out. The more he complains, the more tired people are going to become. When you say the same thing over and over again, it doesn't have the same shock value. N that is why, the Panorama interview had such an effect, coz it happened only once and not "tap, tap, tap..."
 
That's not a specifically royal problem though and he had more opportunities than others. Lots of people have to figure out what they're going to do if they don't want to work in the family business.

He could have stayed in the army and it was reported at the time that his father and family would be quite happy if he was a career soldier and were surprised when he quit.


He could have taken over a farm, (heh) or retrained as a commercial pilot or retrained as anything else - there are programmes for ex servicemembers or even just lived on his inheritance. It seems like Charles might have bankrolled him if he stayed in the UK. Plenty of his cousins and other non heirs work.

Sure there would have been restrictions, upsets and public grumbling but he wasn't forced into being a full time working royal and he wasn't until he turned 30 anyway and in the beginning was carrying out 100 engagements or less per year and placing below the Gloucesters and Kents not to mention his own grandparents, father and aunts and uncles.

I dont think that Harry really knew HOW to leave the RF in his 20s. he didn't want to stay as a career soldier because that entailed taking on a desk job, and AFAIR that was when he quit the army....
If he had chosen to devote himself privately to charity work whether in the UK or Africa, it would have been fine for a bit, but I think he would have begun to miss the public notice.. and begun to feel isolated if he'd chosen to settle somewhere abroad where he wasn't known as a prince. Being one of the lads, working with animals or something would have palled...
I think that there were attempts during hte first year of his marriage, to arrange for him and Meghan to have some kind of partial breaks from royal life.. but they weren't what he or Meg wanted...
 
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For me, the bad taste is that Harry and Meghan want to make a career out of all this, talking about deeply personal matters in public.
Harry could have left the BRF and dealt with his shortcomings in private and quietly. Yes, you can speak about your mental health in public and encourage other people to address their problems but you don't need to discuss every detail in podcasts or in high profile interviews.
Your freedom ends when you enter the other people's freedom. To mention other people, like Kate or Charles or the grandparents, what they have done or not done, is trash talking, pure and simple. Even worse, when you do it in order to get money or attention of an audience you want to use for paying for your lifestyle in the long run.
Nobody's family is perfect, especially parents, but in most cases they do their best or have best intentions.
In the long run, it won't end well, I am sure.
I totally agree with you.
 
For me, the bad taste is that Harry and Meghan want to make a career out of all this, talking about deeply personal matters in public.
Harry could have left the BRF and dealt with his shortcomings in private and quietly. Yes, you can speak about your mental health in public and encourage other people to address their problems but you don't need to discuss every detail in podcasts or in high profile interviews.
Your freedom ends when you enter the other people's freedom. To mention other people, like Kate or Charles or the grandparents, what they have done or not done, is trash talking, pure and simple. Even worse, when you do it in order to get money or attention of an audience you want to use for paying for your lifestyle in the long run.
Nobody's family is perfect, especially parents, but in most cases they do their best or have best intentions.
In the long run, it won't end well, I am sure.

I cannot actually listen to the podcast and hear Harry speak for himself (videos are better because they're closed captioned :D) but I feel I'm getting a good grasp at where Harry is in his mind from the quotes I've seen here recently.

Harry never seems to mention that there is someone accredited behind the scenes that is guiding him through his mental health issues. Hence, why I get the "armchair" angle coming from Harry. Does he actually feel that he's "woke" and able to solve his problems all by himself?

There's a big difference between seeking therapy and working on oneself to make changes within and using one's mental issues and woes of the world around him to capitalize on them to draw in an audience ala The Jerry Springer Show where you know the antagonists you're pointing fingers at will never, ever agree to "duke" out the problem on live TV.

A huge part of successful therapy comes from the realization that you can't change anyone else besides yourself. Happiness is an inside job and nobody else is going to make you happy until you're happy with yourself. The person Harry meets in the mirror is the *only* person I think he should be addressing right now. Not his father. Not his brother. Not his wife and children. Himself. Privately. Quietly.
 
Penny Junor has a good article in The Times:



https://archive.ph/cjfbc


I can't listen anymore to those journalists and authors who tell him to be quiet as he was priviledged. it's the same as to tell your own kids to eat everything because the little children in India go hungry, but you do nothing about hungry kids elsewhere at all. And then you tell your kids they should stop eating so much because they are getting fat! (I'm quite glad those poor people around the world are at least no poor examples of getting fat, otherwise they would be taken out of their box to be shown to the kids.



My God, what Penny Junor wrote here is some sort of abuse! Every one has a right to tell about their experiences. Privileged people have hurts, too. And being surrounded by love??? There are more people around a young prince than just his family (who all worked hard, btw.) And not all are loving! Even Royal servants can be envious. Paul Burrell comes to mind, he does not appear to be an overly loving butler when he stole Diana's things from her sons.



Just be realistic for one. Harry feels hurt or angry and he tells of his feelings. I guess he will even write a memoir one day. He "might" even call it "Memories of a privileged sufferer". Who knows. But could you please stop to just make him the victim of his name/birth/public interest in him on dessecting his character? He is trying the best he can to cope. He obviously can find it in him to go on a podcast/TV etc. telling "his" story. Yes, poor Charles and poor queen. But isn't it better to hear from a (and I think he still is) loving family member and then form your own opinion than to just believe what the papers come up with?


Harry did not say Charles didn't try. He just sees Charles as a product of his own upbringing trying to parent. That's not a new theory and one helpful when you try to cope with your own feelings about your childhood. Honestly: we all knew that Charles was a loving father, but one who couldn't spend too much time with the children because of his duty. Now Harry states he want to make growing-up different for his children. That's okay. I hope he succeeds.
 
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