Death of Comtesse Alix de Lannoy: August 26, 2012

[casualfan]

How terrible! My thoughts go to her and her family in this awful time.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

It is longer to recover from a sudden death like this... you are quite unprepared... two months are nothing.

How right you are. I lost my mother in Jan 2010, and I STILL miss her so intensely at times I want to curl up in a ball...yesterday I was driving around doing errands and began to sob uncontrollably. The loss of one's mother leaves an almost primitive aching grief that is impossible to describe to someone who has not experienced it. She was exactly the same age as Countess Alix.

My heart aches for Stephanie and her entire family, and Guillaume too, because he has had time to become close to his future in-laws. Thank God Stephanie has him right now. If they were a "normal" couple they could go off somewhere and have a quiet little ceremony....but of course that is not possible.

The stress of trying to prepare for a Royal Wedding in less than 8 weeks while grieving the sudden death of a parent has to be unimaginable.

 

[4Pam]

Poor Stephanie! Very tragic news. My condolences to her family.

 

[COUNTESS]

It is tragic news, but you go on. I lost my first husband and my father 1 month apart to the day. They both died, suddenly. My mother and I went on. You have to, if you believe that life goes on. The wedding should be joyful, because weddings are a beginning and joyful. Her mother would have wanted it that way.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

COUNTESS, I am sorry for your double loss in such a short space of time...you and your family must have been left reeling!

The late Countess Alix was by all accounts a woman of deep and profound faith. She belonged to at least one Catholic lay organization devoted to social justice and the poor.

I agree that she would probably want her youngest daughter to forge ahead with her wedding plans, definitely.

 

[Mariel]

This may change the type of clothing worn at the wedding meetings other than the religious ceremony. The colors at least. And it will make it not appropriate to have the narrator for television who we have heard would be doing this, a couturier. Stephanie and her family probably have plenty of clothes in the right colors for a mourning period, so it should not be a problem unless people are too concerned with style. I hope to hear no comments about her style at the pre-wedding gala or at the civil ceremony. The religious wedding--well, she will have a white dress and that's will elicit comments. And of course the other participants will need to be in subdued colors, such as Maria Teresa and all the countesses and princesses.

 

[COUNTESS]

It is their wedding. They can mourn at other times, but the wedding is a celebration of life. Color of clothes is ridiculous. You mourn in your heart, not in your dress. That has all gone out of the style. They should look back on their wedding with joy, as her mother would want, not some dreadful event. It is weeks away. Thirty days, at best, for colors and, certainly, not for a wedding.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

This is a shock. It goes to show that you never know, posters were predicting the father of the bride's demise and now this.
I don't know how she can go on with her wedding less than 2 months away.

She seems a poised and dignified young woman, and I suspect she will carry on brilliantly. But it won't make it any less painful.

What a way to begin her life as a Royal consort-talk about baptism by fire!

If I was a bride-to-be and made a list of the five worst things that could happen in the runup to the wedding, the sudden death of my mother would be at the very top of the list.

 

[claypoint2]

My heartfelt condolences to Countess Stéphanie, to her father, and to her siblings. My prayers are - and will remain - with with them over the coming weeks.

The religious wedding--well, she will have a white dress and that's will elicit comments.

In addition to being the liturgical color for celebrations of Holy Matrimony, white is the liturgical color of the Resurrection, and every Christian funeral is a reminder and a statement of belief in the Resurrection. Therefore white can be appropriately worn at most Christian funerals (even if many people don't know this and opt for black instead). For example, Queen Fabiola of the Belgians, a fervent Roman Catholic, was dressed entirely in white at the funeral of her beloved husband King Baudouin.

Not that that's the reason that Stéphanie will wear a white dress at her wedding... She will wear white because she is getting married. But white happens to be a perfectly appropriate color for Holy Matrimony and for a Christian who mourns and yet proclaims the Resurrection. So, if anyone were to "make comments" because Stéphanie is wearing a white dress, not only would they be showing a significant amount of pettiness and mean-spiritidness - they would also be wrong.

 

[Meraude]

This may change the type of clothing worn at the wedding meetings other than the religious ceremony. The colors at least. And it will make it not appropriate to have the narrator for television who we have heard would be doing this, a couturier. Stephanie and her family probably have plenty of clothes in the right colors for a mourning period, so it should not be a problem unless people are too concerned with style. I hope to hear no comments about her style at the pre-wedding gala or at the civil ceremony. The religious wedding--well, she will have a white dress and that's will elicit comments. And of course the other participants will need to be in subdued colors, such as Maria Teresa and all the countesses and princesses.

I don't know what etiquette rules there is in Belgium and Luxembourg when it comes to wearing mourning dress/colours at a wedding, but in Sweden proper etiquette says that "wedding breaks mourning" and thus it would be wrong to wear mourning colours at a wedding. As for mourning colours, white was the colour of deepest mourning for European queens for a long time and queen Fabiola of Belgium did wear a white dress at her husband's funeral, and queen Elizabeth, the queen mother, had a white wardrobe at a state visit to France after her mother's death in 1938. Mourning - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I wouldn't be surprised if there will not be a pre-wedding gala dinner, as it's not a necessary part of a wedding, and that there will only be a civil and religious ceremony.

 

[Moonmaiden23]

But Meraude, I am certain there will be some type of reception otherwise it would be pointless to invite all the foreign Royalties and heads-of-State that I am sure will be invited.

They can't just invite them to witness the two ceremonies and then send them to the airport with a wave good-bye.

What will probably happen is that the Gala that was to follow the civil ceremony has been downgraded from a ball to a dinner-with no tiaras.

Then after the Nuptial Mass the following afternoon there will be a luncheon/reception.

Many of the European Royals who will be attending this wedding are not only family but close friends, and they are all undoubtedly deeply saddened for Guillaume and his bride.

 

[jaysonbautista]

too bad..
would the wedding continue despite of the sad event?

 

[Meraude]

But Meraude, I am certain there will be some type of reception otherwise it would be pointless to invite all the foreign Royalties and heads-of-State that I am sure will be invited.

They can't just invite them to witness the two ceremonies and then send them to the airport with a wave good-bye.

What will probably happen is that the Gala that was to follow the civil ceremony has been downgraded from a ball to a dinner-with no tiaras.

Then after the Nuptial Mass the following afternoon there will be a luncheon/reception.

Many of the European Royals who will be attending this wedding are not only family but close friends, and they are all undoubtedly deeply saddened for Guillaume and his bride.

Yes, the gala dinner will most likely be only dinner and no ball afterwards. An other alternative could be that only the families of the bride and groom attend the civil ceremony on Friday and the royal guests attend the religious ceremony with a reception afterwards on Saturday, so that the wedding will only be a one-day event for most of the royal guests, as I think the Belgian royal family will attend both ceremonies as being close relatives.

 

[Hendrik-Jan77]

too bad..
would the wedding continue despite of the sad event?

I think plans will go ahead unchanged at the moment.
If, God forbid, Stephanie's father would also die before the wedding, plans will change probably.
Maybe a postponement untill next spring would be likely.

 

[leidi]

Such sad news, poor Stephanie, I can't even imagine the pain she's into

I just hope people don't go all judgmental on her if she's smiling at her wedding day, like someone said earlier here, a wedding is a celebration of life and I think the Late countess would have loved to see her daughter happy.

Is it known when the Funeral is taking place and where?

 

[SLV]

Poor Stéphanie.
She, Guillaime and the families have my condolences.
What a horrible thing to happen, especially just before the wedding.

 

[Mirabel]

I think plans will go ahead unchanged at the moment.

I think so too.
After all, at this point all of the arrangements have most likely been made; I can't see them leaving anything to the last minute (and really, as far as wedding plans go, it is the last minute!)

And I believe the Countess would not want any changes made for her youngest child's wedding.

 

[Kataryn]

I think plans will go ahead unchanged at the moment.
If, God forbid, Stephanie's father would also die before the wedding, plans will change probably.
Maybe a postponement untill next spring would be likely.

I personally don't think so, as surely Stephanie needs her fiancé very much in such a situation and best as her husband. They could get married civilly and then have a short religious ceremony and marry again at their first anniversary (with mourning over) in a great religious ceremony. Things like that have been done before.

 

[Mariel]

When I spoke of Stephanie's white wedding dress, I was not saying it was inappropriate, certainly not. I meant that people would comment on the style, as they usually do, which is fine. I just meant that comments on other clothes worn to the civil wedding or the "gala", or whatever meetings there are, would be inappropriate. They may wear more subdued clothes which they already have in their closets, and no one should comment on this. Yes, it is grand that white is a color of resurrection as well as of marriage.

My mother didn't come to my wedding because she disapproved of me and of my new husband. My husband turned out to be a "prince", as my father said. Many heartaches in this world, and the resurrection is a wonderful thought to have now in our hearts.

 

[suztav]

Has anyone received official word that the two-day wedding has been scaled back to one day or is it just speculation on this board?

I think the wedding should go on ... I have to imagine Stephanie's mother would want her daughter to bask in all the happiness possible.

I have a neighbor whose father-in-law-to-be died on the morning of the wedding. They had the ceremony and reception ... just didn't go on a honeymoon.

 

[Princess BellyFlop]

About 50 yhears ago, after a long illness my grandfather died exactly one month before my mother's wedding. She still got married (didn't HAVE too in case some are wondering). They just scaled down the parrty after and had it at the house - they lived on the country side. They probably didn't have music out of respect - which is something that would have been done here. Looking at the pictures, it looks like a very happy picnic. Wind blowing, sincere smiles, all the families from both sides.

I believe the countess should do the same and enjoy - on a lower scale - her moment of happiness with her new hubby.

 

[Blue_]

Such a sad news! Praying for Stéphanie and her family.
I don't think they'll postpone the wedding, I wouldn't do it anyway, Stéphanies mother was happy for her, and Stéphanie knew that. I just hope her dad won't pass away, this happens often, sadly...
I think it will be really hard to not see her mother at her wedding, but I don't think that changes if you mother died since 2 months or 2 years...
Wishing her much strenght!

 

[Meraude]

Has anyone received official word that the two-day wedding has been scaled back to one day or is it just speculation on this board?

It's all speculations, and I don't think there will be any official word if there will be any changes made to the wedding plans until after the funeral of comtesse Alix, there will be time to discuss eventual changes when the de Lannoy family have made their final farewells to a beloved wife and mother.

 

[DukeOfAster]

I would like to say I extend my sympathies to the Countess. On to what happens with the wedding that is truly up to the Countess. Everyone must decide these things on their own. Right now we should be concerned with a young lady who lost her mother.

 

[Lindy]

I don't think that most of the guests are invited to the civil ceremony. Usually this is only for the immediate family and attendants. For Louis and Tessy, it was family only.

 

[maria-olivia]

The Countess was 20 years younger than her husband who is 91 years old. All my wishes are to him , he must have had a terrible shock !
It is not possible for the Grand Ducal Court to postpone the wedding , and I think they will have to avoid all extra Glitter .

 

[Moonmaiden23]

The website of the Grand Ducal Court says that the Countess's funeral rites will be held "dans la plus stricte intimite de la famille" meaning that it will probably take place in the Chapel that adjoins the de Lannoy family castle at Anvaing.

It doesn't get more private than that.

 

[Breffney]

My sincere condolences to Stephanie and all of her family at this very sad time.

Her wedding day will be tinged with great sadness but hopefully she will also find it loving and joyous and full of memories to treasure.

 

[Saschana]

Luxarazzi reports that the funeral will take place on Friday in Anvaing, it will be a strictly private occassion.

Luxembourg: Funeral Arrangements

 

[Marijke]

It is in this paper, hope the link is working.


inmemoriam.be - Alix de Lannoy et du Saint-Empire († 26/8/2012)