Princess Mary's Personality

[adelaide]

I feel the same way. Since day 1, I just cannot warm up to this woman. I have no problems with the other CPs, but Mary...there is something very fake in her.

I don't want to be so severe but in fact I have a lot of difficluties to have some interst for Mary. It's a question of feeling and personality and only for that I can't say nothing because I'm biaised.

 

[michelleq]

I never was a fan of Mary; I admire her dress sense (most of the time). But I always said that she was very calculating. She is mimicing IMHO some of Diana but with arrogance!

 

[ysbel]

I'm far less interested in hearing whether somebody likes Mary or not (if one has been around these forums long enough, one gets a sense of who likes Mary and who doesn't so that tells us nothing new)

But I am interested to hear what people think of Mary's personality. So for example, one person can think she does not look friendly in public and I may see that same trait too. One of us may like Mary and one of us may not but it really doesn't matter, what's interesting is that we see the same thing.

I'm not a fan of trying to guess what people's intentions are for example, trying to steal the spotlight. Going by my initial impressions of the photos at the christening posted before, if I had to guess what one person would be trying to steal the spotlight from the others, I would have to say Maxima because she was wearing a vivid red dress and red is a known attention grabbing color.

However it may be that Maxima just feels comfortable in red, she looks good in it and wasn't thinking about upstaging anyone. Red is one of my favorite colors and I will wear it sometimes just because I like it not because I'm trying to upstage someone.

It may be the same thing with Mary. She may be doing something that is simply comfortable for her. As with Maxima, I think the important thing is that some people think she upstages the other royals and other people don't think she does. In the two pictures posted, she was the last royal I noticed in the group and I generally like Mary, but then again I am most drawn to contrasting color and Mary wasn't wearing a contrasting color like Maxima and Margrethe were.

 

[UserDane]

In the two pictures posted, she was the last royal I noticed in the group and I generally like Mary, but then again I am most drawn to contrasting color and Mary wasn't wearing a contrasting color like Maxima and Margrethe were.

Mary looks almost frail and very pale in these pictures - she was the last one I noticed too in the pictures.

 

[Empress]

I was going to comment on how I really both agree with those who find Mary coming across as aloof and superficial, as well as those who lean to finding Mary sympathetic but shy...but I'm having second thoughts..because I'm thinking, we don't know this person at all really.

We may get a glimpse, and a sense, but even then...Mary, and for that matter all people in the spot light, may or may totally not, in reality, resemble even an inkling of their public persona.

We just aren't able to really judge..and I know I know, I'm often the first one to be critical of a royal, but I'm trying to be a bit less judgmental these days, because I'm thinking, what if it was me, being judged by total strangers about the way I do things, the way I do anything, just based on pictures and hear-say?

If I were and in the spot light and naturally shy, as Mary may well be, all these comments would make me even more shy I think.

But ok, I'll judge her on one thing...the way we've seen her treat her dog Ziggy is really nice, kind. You can tell she considers the dog part of the family very much. The way she greeted Ziggy when they brought Christian home from the hospital, that was very cute.

Ok, I'll say one other thing: Mary could indeed step up to the plate a bit more when it comes to serious causes. I mean, I haven't seen her take up a seat on a panel on the world leaders' Davos forum the way a certain young queen, who's also into fashion and had a nose job, has done a nr. of years.

Or the way Maxima has dedicated herself to helping the cause of loans to those without a lot of collateral.

What I mean is, IF there's room for improvement as far as Mary's concerned, she could apply herself a bit more to perhaps more heavier causes..she has the brains obviously, so why not? She's been involved in too much light-hearted stuff, enough with that already. Leave the fluff to Fred!

Yes, but you have to be invited to sit on those councils. Maxima was only invited after she had been in her role for about 4-5 years. And MANY of Marys patronages are very serious charities.

 

[Polly]

Although Mary's been in Denmark for quite some time now, I must say that, after watching Isabella's christening, I'm quite impressed with her burgeoning command of Danish.

Like many Australians, I learnt Latin, French and a little German at school, although the trend these days is to teach Mandarin, Japanese and Indonesian in lieu of European languages. I also have been studying Japanese, part time, for some years, though I'm still not very proficient. In my opinion, and I really don't mean to offend anyone here, Danish sounded very difficult to me. I actually tried to reproduce some of the sounds which the television commentators were uttering but found it too hard, which surprised me, given that I don't find German pronunciation a problem (though I'm sure that I speak it with an accent: it's certain with my French as when there, they always laugh, though with a friendly pat for at least trying!).

In sum, and from my own limited experience, I applaud Mary for what I can only imagine is her hard work and application in learning her country's language. It can't have been easy for her, particularly when every thing that she said or did was scrutinized so closely and open to so much criticism.

The Scots, we know, are renowned for their hard work and tenacity; Australians for relentlessly striving to overcome even the most difficult of of problems to succeed. My view is that Denmark is very lucky in their Crown Princess, just as she is lucky to have been so welcomed and has become so valued by so many Danes, and with such palpable generosity of spirit..

 

[princess olga]

Yes, but you have to be invited to sit on those councils. Maxima was only invited after she had been in her role for about 4-5 years. And MANY of Marys patronages are very serious charities.

Yes that's true. I also have to say I don't follow which charities Mary endorses too closely for some reason. I get the sense that we all think that Mary is so into fashion because of her early days as a CP when she posed for Vogue as well as the sheer fact the lady has some sense of how to put herself together.

It is entirely possible that by now, she has utterly moved on from her so-called clotheshorse-y days and is into substance, but her reputation at this point, judging by some of the comments, seems sealed. Maybe it's time for Mary to up the publicity on those serious charities a bit, so that her reputation will match reality?

 

[princess olga]

..and you know what too, when you'd go to the thread about Fred's former girlfriends, you realise one thing: it could have been so much worse, than Mary! I wonder though if the Danes think that her personality fits, well, the personality of the Danes?

 

[tabbitha]

I guess we all see different things in people. i don't see a calculating or fake person at all-just the opp- i see a confident , happy person with herself and she's in love with her husband and children. I think she has carried herself extremely well both prior to their wedding and now- you never heard any scandals breaking or her talking to the press and that goes for her family too and she's NOTHING like Diana...... Mary is Mature, caring and whilst i have nothing against Diana ,Mary is content with her own self and it shows when she meets people and they warm to her. To me they are nothing alike....What reputation !!!!! How can liking clothes be a crime-she looks good- no one wants to see an ordinary Princess no matter how we try- she gives the people what they want surely without sounding arrogant either.
i think she has found her niche now and she should be given credit. just my 2 cents worth...She has been here long enough now to hold her own and she does so with great aplomb...

 

[crisscross1]

What reputation !!!!! How can liking clothes be a crime-she looks good- no one wants to see an ordinary Princess no matter how we try.

I agree with everything you have said tabbitha and espcially your comment about her fashion. Yesterday after watching the beautiful christening of Princess Isabella I was surprised, but not shocked, to read all the comments about Mary and how boring she looked. Had she worn an expensive, designer outfit she would have been criticised for over spending.
And for what it's worth, I happen to think that what she wore was perfectly beautiful and appropriate for a summer Christening.

 

[Jo of Palatine]

This is a really interesting discussion about the question if the media has a right to interviews. I, being a journalist myself, must say: no. I like the way Mary and Fred behave in public. I watched most videos provided through links from DRW and always liked the way Mary interacts with other people. She is quick to smile back, she winks, she's polite and says thank you if she is offered help from someone, eg. if someone opens a door for her.

IMHo she gives the danish public the image of an approachable Royal. I've seen video coverage of them walking in the royal park and greeting other people walking there. They are just not amused if they are filmed doing that. They communicate via their homepage on eg. saying thank you. They can't do that to each and everybody personally because it's too much, there are too many people interested in them. They try to give insights in their lifes through the private pictures they publish there. But they obviously have a clear idea where their private sphere starts and this is important. Important for them but important to respect as well.

Why should they give a "big" interview now? They answer questions if asked during their public duties. What is it that we don't know about them? That they are still in love and adore their kids? Come on, we all know that.
How Mary feels in her new position? Do really think she would not give a "suitable" answer? That said, I don't think Mary is a "fake" - she is just a person cast in a special role she tries to fulfiill.

There are only a few people who can live like they want, without bothering about other's opinions. As a lot posters said before: in private they are different than in their professional life. They behave like they have to in their professional life. Are they fakes because of it? No, they only behave according to the social role they have to fulfill at any given time. That's how life is. Queen Margrethe probably feels more an artist than a politician. But because of the role life has cast her in, she most of the time deals with the political situation of her country. Is she a fake then? Because she concentrates on being the souverain instead of following her artistical nature? I don't think so.

 

[UserDane]

Jo, this is one of the best and most sensible posts I have read for a long time. Thank you

 

[tabbitha]

Thanks crisscross & Excellent post JOP.
What more do they want of her- she does what is asked of her and if they did give a BIG interview then others would say she's wanting MORE attention etc etc- she can't WIN either way- there are some who will NEVER be happy with whatever she does or doesn't do. :ron:The one character trait that I admire in Mary is that you never hear her say a bad word about anyone- she is always faithful to her past and present..She's never caused any scandal or brought shame onto the Danish Royal family. You never hear of her getting into any trouble.I really can't understand what more she can give of herself..

 

[GrandDuchessOlga]

Yesterday after watching the beautiful christening of Princess Isabella I was surprised, but not shocked, to read all the comments about Mary and how boring she looked. Had she worn an expensive, designer outfit she would have been criticised for over spending.
And for what it's worth, I happen to think that what she wore was perfectly beautiful and appropriate for a summer Christening.

But she DID wear a designer outfit

IMO and apparantly on the contrary to everone else´s opinions, I thought she looked stunning and absolutly ravishing. the dress suited her dark hair very well and was just appropriate for the small but at the same time formal occasion. I also have to applaude Fred and Mary for their upbringing of Christian. He was so sweet and quiet. Never making any fuss. I know a little boy who is the same age (they were actually born the exact same day) and he would NEVER have been able to sit still for at least 30 seconds unless he was sleeping. I remember Nikolai being very impatient at Felix´s christening 5 years ago.

 

[royal pauper]

I guess we all see different things in people. i don't see a calculating or fake person at all-just the opp- i see a confident , happy person with herself and she's in love with her husband and children. I think she has carried herself extremely well both prior to their wedding and now- you never heard any scandals breaking or her talking to the press and that goes for her family too and she's NOTHING like Diana...... Mary is Mature, caring and whilst i have nothing against Diana ,Mary is content with her own self and it shows when she meets people and they warm to her. To me they are nothing alike....What reputation !!!!! How can liking clothes be a crime-she looks good- no one wants to see an ordinary Princess no matter how we try- she gives the people what they want surely without sounding arrogant either.
i think she has found her niche now and she should be given credit. just my 2 cents worth...She has been here long enough now to hold her own and she does so with great aplomb...

I second that! I think P Mary is very natural, lovely woman and totaly in love with her husband. Wouldn't you like to look good when you know that "all the world" is looking at you.

 

[royal pauper]

But she DID wear a designer outfit

.

As she should! She is a Princess after all and I don't expect her to wear K-Mart clothing just to show how simple and humble she is.

 

[MissSaga]

I agree with everything you have said tabbitha and espcially your comment about her fashion. Yesterday after watching the beautiful christening of Princess Isabella I was surprised, but not shocked, to read all the comments about Mary and how boring she looked. Had she worn an expensive, designer outfit she would have been criticised for over spending.
And for what it's worth, I happen to think that what she wore was perfectly beautiful and appropriate for a summer Christening.

I agree with your last sentence ! She looked absolutely beautiful.

About the rest of your post, She can't win either way ...

 

[Jo of Palatine]

I agree with your last sentence ! She looked absolutely beautiful.

About the rest of your post, She can't win either way ...

IMHO she doesn't have to. Her husband obviously loves her, her in-laws look kind and friendly when they watch her, she has healthy kids and the danes in their majority seem to either like her or be uninterested. Why should she care what people critizise her for? She has already won those hearts which are important: her family's and her countrymen's.

 

[GrandDuchessOlga]

As she should! She is a Princess after all and I don't expect her to wear K-Mart clothing just to show how simple and humble she is.

Come on. I´m not saying she shouldn´t. It´s part of her role as a crown princess to represent the fashion and design of Danish designers.

 

[Regina]

IMHO she doesn't have to. Her husband obviously loves her, her in-laws look kind and friendly when they watch her, she has healthy kids and the danes in their majority seem to either like her or be uninterested. Why should she care what people critizise her for? She has already won those hearts which are important: her family's and her countrymen's.

I couldn't agree more. I live in a Republic, but if my country was a monarchy I would pick Mary as my Crown Princess She's lovely and very professional in everything she does.

 

[Madame Royale]

Great post on the previous page, Jo. An Invaluable and level headed contribution I thought! And one I agree with wholeheartedly.

 

[highpriestess]

I am not a fan of Mary. I understand why some people feel she's "fake", "shallow", "arrogant" etc.

Mary is probably the one who changed the most after dating/marrying her prince. She changed her accent, skin (thanks to a well-published skin consultant), style (thanks to a well-published stylist), lost weight etc. in order to look more royal. Sure, other princesses also become more polished with more money. But Mary changed the most. That gave the impression of her being fake. She's no longer the a bit chubby, sporty, tan Australian woman in tank top. She's now a creation all the money can buy.

As for being shallow, this has a lot to do with all the "fashion icon" business. She did much more than just attending several fashion shows "in support of Danish fashion industry". She's actively hyped as a fashion icon by Danish, Australian press and perhaps, Danish court. She modeled foreigners' clothes and posted for fashion magazines. No other princesses in recent memory have ever done that. (Diana did the fashion shoots after her divorce. Plus, if I remember correctly, Diana wore her own clothes for the shoot.) When she acts more like a celebrity than a royal, it's not surprising that a lot of people have the impression of a shallow person. The fact that she was shown as "turing it on" for the camera but no interest in the event she's attending doesn't help.

Mary also has a very haughty body language. The chin-in-the-air is well noted, even by the painter of her portrait. She also extended her hand in this very hauty way that I just found very offputting. She would hold her hand out in a 45 degree angle down from her wrist. It seems to show her superiority or reluctance to shake the other person's hand. She's caught on photos like that often before.

I personally don't think she's arrogant. I do think she's very insecure. A confident person wouldn't have changed so much after marriage. She seems to think the haughty body language is how a princess supposed to be and she wants to be seens as a true princess. It's another new thing she adapts after marriage. She's the most at ease interacting with children because she knew children were star-struch and wouldn't judge her poor Danish or lack of intellectual capacity. I don't think she has much intellectual depth from all the interviews she gave. She's inarticulate even in her native English. But again, since Fred isn't exactly an intellectual giant himself. Mary suits him just fine.

These are just from my observations. I don't mean to offend any Danes or Aussies.

 

[Madame Royale]

Mary is probably the one who changed the most after dating/marrying her prince. She changed her accent, skin (thanks to a well-published skin consultant), style (thanks to a well-published stylist), lost weight etc.

Changed her accent? When you're an Australian and you start learning a second language which is to become, officially, your first and having studied it for 5 or so years, perhaps then you would better understand the reasons as to why her voice is relatively 'changed', but given you aren't and can't grasp the Australian lingo...

Her skin? I know, isn't it flawless. Like cream and not a visible pore in sight!

Style? Well, the dishevelled onion sack wasn't exactly the look they were going for I'd imagine.

Lost weight? Now where did that 'musn't lose weight if your a Crown Princess' commandment get too?!

She's now a creation all the money can buy.

I attribute Mary's creation to her parents myself.

The chin-in-the-air is well noted

And what a lovely chin it is!

even by the painter of her portrait

Of course, her fault. And to which portrait do you refer? the one where HRH is looking directly 'at you', or the one where she is looking out the window?

She also extended her hand in this very auty way that I just found very offputting.

'auty'? Perhaps you meant haughty?

She would hold her hand out in a 45 degree angle down from her wrist

You even know the angle?.lol.

It seems to show her superiority or reluctance to shake the other person's hand.

Or perhaps it's more reflective of a court portraiture style.

She's caught on photos like that often before.

I've never once seen her reluctant to shake someones hand. Young, old, disabled...infact on two occasions whilst pregnant with Christian, Mary was not phased by the attempts of a young girl and a mentally disabled teenager to touch her stomach, Infact, she took their hands and placed them on her tummy.

I personally don't think she's arrogant.

Come again?

I do think she's very insecure.

Interesting...

She's the most at ease interacting with children because she knew children were star-struch

Saying it how it "is" I see...in the 'know' are we?

and wouldn't judge her poor Danish or lack of intellectual capacity.

And how is your Danish coming along? As for her intellectual capacity, that is very much a brazen insult about someone you do not know.

These are just my observations and I do not mean any offence by them

 

[Regina]

I don't see why the lost of weight or a regal look can be bad things... I prefer the elegance of Mary to the heavy make up or the boring look that some crown princesses show all the time.

 

[Jo of Palatine]

Plus let me trow in my memories of the times hwen I was both young and vain: I had a book by Eileen Ford about how they changed young girls to "Ford models". I my youth that was something you aspired to become. Mary obviously follwed similar advices when she decided to model for Danmark. Good for her and perfect for Danmark.

As for her "poor Danish" - the native Danish speakers on this forum have the opinion that Mary is pretty good in speaking Danish. Who but they can pass judgment on that?

 

[UserDane]

Highpriestess, you are definitely entitled to your opinion of Mary - as we all are
As to the part about her changed looks; I cannot see how it can be helped. I would have done exactly the same - even finally shed my excess weight - if I were constantly photographed, followed, analysed and discussed.
Even though we as spectators may find it quite endearing that our CP fell in love with an ordinary, non-insect-thin girl who preferred a very casual dress-code, I doubt that we would continue to find it charming if our CPss' appearance didn't get more polished over time. The fact that Mary quickly realised that does not, IMO, reflect negatively on her personality. As I have often said before she is a natural at her 'job' - but by some that seems to be perceived as a negative trait - which I do not understand. I way I see the institution of royalty today, a great amount of professionalism is required and if Mary has that good for her - and not least good for us Danes. I don't see it as a necessarily positive quality trait if she had had to use X years stumbling and fumbling her way into her new life.

 

[Duke of Marmalade]

Mary is a great ambassador for Denmark and being a spotlight or fashion person doesn't make her shallow or stupid. She does a lot of "serious" work too, indeed, has given birth to two kids in three years and seems to have a happy family life.

I prefer her active role much more to the role model of being in the husband's shadow all the time w/o any own activities and wearing boring and uninspired clothes - wearing designer wear doesn't make you more superficial and wearing old fashioned stuff doesn't make you more serious as a Crown Princess - so why not dressing up in the appropriate way Mary does.

And in terms of changing her personality - maybe apart from Maxima I don't see any CP who has NOT changed very much since marrying into a Royal House.

 

[lise]

As for being shallow, this has a lot to do with all the "fashion icon" business. She did much more than just attending several fashion shows "in support of Danish fashion industry". She's actively hyped as a fashion icon by Danish, Australian press and perhaps, Danish court. She modeled foreigners' clothes and posted for fashion magazines. No other princesses in recent memory have ever done that. (Diana did the fashion shoots after her divorce. Plus, if I remember correctly, Diana wore her own clothes for the shoot.) When she acts more like a celebrity than a royal, it's not surprising that a lot of people have the impression of a shallow person. The fact that she was shown as "turing it on" for the camera but no interest in the event she's attending doesn't help.

Okay Mary does attend fashion shows but several isn't the word I'd use. Go back and read this thread there's information already posted about Mary and the Danish fashion industry. I don't think the hype surrounding Mary as a fashion icon is something that should be held against her. The press write alot of hyped up nonsense about pretty much everyone, not alot of it is creditable. (Well they do in Australia, I can't speak for Denmark) She posed for those fashion mazagines two years ago and hasn't done it since. Are people going to hold that against her forever?

 

[ysbel]

One particular trait I noticed with Mary during the christening was how many times she easily and effortlessly laughed with others. Some times she seemed to catch eye contact with someone that was out of camera range and break open a big open smile and quiet laugh. She appeared a lot more open and unguarded than she appears in still photos. I love the regal, haughty look, don't get me wrong. I'm tired of princesses trying to act like my best friend but I was pleasantly surprised at how natural and unguarded Mary looked.

So I may have to re-vamp my opinion of Mary's personality.

 

[highpriestess]

Okay Mary does attend fashion shows but several isn't the word I'd use....
I don't think the hype surrounding Mary as a fashion icon is something that should be held against her. The press write alot of hyped up nonsense about pretty much everyone, not alot of it is creditable.

Checked back Mary's calendar for these past three years. She's attending more than a couple fashion shows.

All the Danish press and Australian press would all of a sudden decided together to hype Mary as a "fashion icon" if she hasn't done those fashion shoots/modeling at the very beginning of her marriage or if the designer, stylist who work for her or even Danish court didn't hype her up as such? There's nothing wrong to dress designers' gear. It's the hype, with her cooperation/contribution, that was the problem. There's no way she's a fashion icon. Wearing designers' outfit right off the runway or ad doesn't make a fashion icon. Yes, the modeling and fashion shoots are two years ago. Have you ever heard that first impression registers with people?