Should Camilla attend the memorial service for Diana?

[Skydragon]

We are talking about excluding their stepmother whom I am sure feels uncomfortable every time she steps out the door from the majority of those of us who adore Diana. If we want to support William and Harry, we will be forgiving and gracious to their father and stepmother for this one hour IN A HOUSE OF WORSHIP they focus in remembering their mother.

I wouldn't think anyone gives the people who adored Diana any thought at all, least of all Charles or Camilla.

 

[Skydragon]

It wouldn't surprise me if a lot of the people at the service would rather have spent the day in private remembrance.

It wouldn't surprise me if half the people expected to attend, would rather be getting on with their own lives.

 

[Henri M.]

Her going is just not kosher in my opinion. Diana held a lot of animosity towards her, for whatever reason, and did not consider her a friend. IN ANY situation, I think that the people who honor your memory at such a service should be those who cared for you in life, and for whom you cared as well.

Just my opinion though.

To remain consequent in your way of thinking, it would be Prince Charles at first to remain away at the Memorial. After all it was with hím she had such a bitter and tragic marriage.

And of course also someone like The Duke of Edinburgh, who apparently couldn't stand the sight of Diana, should not then go either.

Not to mention The Princess Royal who had no any understanding whatsoever for Diana's 'wailing' when she was "for God's sake!" The Princess of Wales.

The Chapel would suddenly find a few of empty seats....

 

[milla Ca]

If we want to support William and Harry, we will be forgiving and gracious to their father and stepmother for this one hour IN A HOUSE OF WORSHIP they focus in remembering their mother.

How generous of you....!

 

[Aquarela]

To remain consequent in your way of thinking, it would be Prince Charles at first to remain away at the Memorial. After all it was with hím she had such a bitter and tragic marriage.

And of course also someone like The Duke of Edinburgh, who apparently couldn't stand the sight of Diana, should not then go either.

Not to mention The Princess Royal who had no any understanding whatsoever for Diana's 'wailing' when she was "for God's sake!" The Princess of Wales.

The Chapel would suddenly find a few of empty seats....

camilla caused the divorce of charles and diana, not the duke of edinburgh. if camilla hadnt cheat on andrew charlles wouldnt divorce diana.

its a matter of taste and manners i guess. if i caused a divorce i wouldnt be present in the womans memorial. its not kosher at all.

 

[Charlotte1]

camilla caused the divorce of charles and diana, not the duke of edinburgh. if camilla hadnt cheat on andrew charlles wouldnt divorce diana.

its a matter of taste and manners i guess. if i caused a divorce i wouldnt be present in the womans memorial. its not kosher at all.

William and Harry have acknowledged that their parents' marriage broke down due to their incompatibility, these were 2 people who never should have got married. Neither William or Harry consider Camilla the cause of their parents' marital breakdown, they have personally invited Camilla to the memorial. What is tasteless and bad manners is the way people and the various tabloids continue to ruin what should have been a solemn and respectful memorial to Diana, to nothing more than a squalid soap opera.

 

[lucien]

To remain consequent in your way of thinking, it would be Prince Charles at first to remain away at the Memorial. After all it was with hím she had such a bitter and tragic marriage.

And of course also someone like The Duke of Edinburgh, who apparently couldn't stand the sight of Diana, should not then go either.

Not to mention The Princess Royal who had no any understanding whatsoever for Diana's 'wailing' when she was "for God's sake!" The Princess of Wales.

The Chapel would suddenly find a few of empty seats....

Anne isn't going,she has another function/is abroad.As for Camilla,she is invited by Di's sons,so who are we to judge if the sons have no problem.It was confirmed today that Princes William and Harry will read the lessons during the service,and Lady Sarah Mc Corquedale will contribute as well.
Clarence House also confirmed today that the Duchess of Cornwall will be attending as she will be accompanying her husband.

Camilla was not alone in the affair,so was Charles.But Camilla or not,that marriage was bound for failure regardless,a kindergarten girl and a man that had his own world already were not inclined for a future together.And besides all that and another thing,Di certainly was no saint.

Ofcourse the press,again,will hype all this to boost the sale,sickening nobodies,as they hyped anything and everything regarding the dead Lady and others,squeezing every penny out they can get their hands on,and a country full of going for the craze of the day,what?People?No,cattle.If they hadn't bought the darn rags then,we probably wouldn't have a Di to remember now.They never learn.

 

[Empress]

I can understand why Charles would be going. They did have children together, and whether or not Diana cared for him in the end, they did both have joy in their children. I think that Charles should go simply as a support for his children. I think that it would be the same in any situation such as this.

I just think that it is in poor taste for Camilla to go, simple beacuse of the way that Diana felt about her. Good for the princes that they are moving on, but the fact of life is, they, their mother, and Camilla, as well as their father are public persons. There are certain things that they have to do to maintain their station in life, and certain things that the world expect of them because of that station.

Is that fair? Probably not, but it is the way it is. I wonder if we asked the parties involved what they would rather, what they would say? I would rather be a private person with all the privacy, problems and misery as well as happiness and mundane every day issues that a private person has, or would they rather be just as they are with the issues, problems, and priveledges that come with their position?

We will never know, but we can express our opinions here, and my opinion is that she should not go, or if she does, she should jkeep a very low profile. The memorial should not be about her, her attendance or the unholy mess the three of them created, but about Diana.

 

[Henri M.]

camilla caused the divorce of charles and diana, not the duke of edinburgh. if camilla hadnt cheat on andrew charlles wouldnt divorce diana.

Sorry, in my very humple opinion Diana's mathematics have not been her best feature.
"There were three in the marriage. A bit crowded."

I actually did count -at least- four persons in that marriage, making Diana losing her rights to complain too hard about this.

 

[ysbel]

Good for the princes that they are moving on, but the fact of life is, they, their mother, and Camilla, as well as their father are public persons. There are certain things that they have to do to maintain their station in life, and certain things that the world expect of them because of that station.

Is that fair? Probably not, but it is the way it is.

An interesting point you bring up here Empress. This is an occasion where it seems that that an action that is good for the inner relations for the members of the British Royal Family is not so welcome from certain areas of the public. And you are right it is not fair.

The question is how the BRF decides to handle this particular fact of life. Do they opt to support the family at the expense of public support or do they opt to bow down to public opinion and disrupt the family that is remaining?

I think we all know the answer of how the BRF decided to proceed; only time will tell if it was the right decision.

I think though after so many decisions where the BRF decided to sacrifice the family for the sake of public opinion, it is perhaps time for them to move a bit in the other direction.

 

[Regina]

Just because William and Harry want Camilla in the ceremony it doesn't mean we have to agree with their decison.
If Charles and Camilla are happy, good for them, I (honestly) wish them the best. Camilla was not "the" cause of charles and diana's divorce but of course she played an important role. Since the beggining of the marriage (even before) she was always there as the third person and she didn't seem to care about it. Charles is so guilty as Camilla but he had 2 children with Diana so I understand his presence in the ceremony.
As lucien said, Diana was not a saint, she had very bad sides on her personality, but it's her memorial and at least here camilla should leave Diana in peace.

 

[Regina]

Sorry, in my very humple opinion Diana's mathematics have not been her best feature.
"There were three in the marriage. A bit crowded."

I actually did count -at least- four persons in that marriage, making Diana losing her rights to complain too hard about this.

This thread is about Camilla's presence in memorial service for Diana, not about if Diana had lovers or not (everyone know she did). But if Charles had died instead of Diana, Diana's lovers (like Hewit or Dodi) wouldn't be present in his memorial service, right?

 

[Empress]

I hope against hope that Camilla is a person that would not do something just to spite Diana. I hope that she is going to support her new family, I just don't think that it is the best decision. Were I in her shoes, I think that I would find it a very difficult choice.

None the less, perhaps this family becoming more approachable by showing that they are in fact human as everyone else, and that they are starting to focus on their family will bring them more sympathetic press. I hope as Henri M says, that their making a decision for family rather than for public will help rather than hurt.

There should be a balance. I just wish that they had perhaps found a different way to start out showing this. Maybe this is a harbinger of what Williams reign will bring.

Regina, unfortunately we will never know what will have happened had the situation been reversed. Henri M is completely within the scope of this discussion to mention what he did, as it does have bearing on whether or not Camilla should go. Diana was not a saint by any means, nor was she the devil incarnate. The fact of the matter is though, that it is her memorial and the way she felt about Camilla should have some factor in whether Camilla goes. I think that Henri was simply trying to make sure that this did not turn into a "Camilla is the only one in the wrong"

 

[Henri M.]

This thread is about Camilla's presence in memorial service for Diana, not about if Diana had lovers or not (everyone know she did). But if Charles had died instead of Diana, Diana's lovers (like Hewit or Dodi) wouldn't be present in his memorial service, right?

Yes.

I think that Mr. Dodi Al-Fayed & Lady Diana Al-Fayed, or Mr. Hewitt & Lady Diana Hewitt, or dr. Hasnat Khan & Lady Diana Khan, would have attended a memorial service for Prince Charles.

 

[hornsen]

This thread is about Camilla's presence in memorial service for Diana, not about if Diana had lovers or not (everyone know she did). But if Charles had died instead of Diana, Diana's lovers (like Hewit or Dodi) wouldn't be present in his memorial service, right?

The "lovers" wouldn´t be. But, the husbands would be.

 

[hornsen]

BBC NEWS | UK | Camilla pulls out of Diana event

I´m without words. Wrong decision to me but, who knows...

 

[branchg]

I think she made the right decision. It is too controversial, stirred up unpleasant memories and clearly was not supported entirely by The Queen.

 

[hornsen]

I think she made the right decision. It is too controversial, stirred up unpleasant memories and clearly was not supported entirely by The Queen.

Why do you know she wasn´t support by the Queen? Who did say that?
I hope the press will leave Camilla alone now. I think it was all very hard for her. I´m looking forward to a (again) frozen Charles at the service. Imagine he is very angry of the "press pack".

 

[love_cc]

I am shocked about this news but it is probably better for everyone. I hope that the newspaper now stops the negative publicity about the service. I always think being there is very difficult for Camilla because this was the place where she married Andrew Parker Bowles.I am not looking forward to watch a forozen Charles during the service.

 

[sirhon11234]

I actually feel a little bit sorry for Camilla, thats a first. Well the memorial must go as planned but I must say that the Diana Circle's behaviour is an embarrassment to the rest of the Princess' fans.

 

[Empress]

Dickie Arbiter, former press secretary to the Queen, told the BBC the Duchess of Cornwall should have acted earlier.
"It could have quite simply been done right at the very beginning when the idea was first mooted to have a service, with a short statement saying the Duchess of Cornwall would love to support her husband, would love to support William and Harry, but she feels that it was inappropriate to attend. "That would have been the story of the day. It would have been done and dusted ... without all this shilly-shallying, all the way up to the memorial service, which is literally five days away."

I have to say that I quite agree with this sentiment. Her doing this at the last moment, while I think the right decision, certainly brings more attention to the situation.

 

[HMQueenElizabethII]

Why do you know she wasn´t support by the Queen? Who did say that?

Wasn't there several reports at early that The Queen believed the Duchess should not attend and should state with diplomatic matters. As the wife to the heir to the throne, she should accompany him on his engagements, in the role to support him and represents the Royal Family. But if we like the Duchess, we need to save her from this. It is a really sensitive matter, the Duchess was thought to be the person who broke the marriage down, and now attending the Memorial Service of Diana, it would bring an uncomfortable feeling for the Duchess, and bring various comments about her days after that i'm sure with you. She would not feel comfortable after that when seeing magazines, newspapers, public comments on her. They would say something like Charles and Camilla now dancing on the grave of Princess Diana or something like that. I think Camilla has done quite well since she became a member of the Royal Family, but after this Memorial Service, it could draw unwell attitudes towards her, so better to keep her in good reputation.

 

[Skydragon]

BBC NEWS | UK | Camilla pulls out of Diana event

I´m without words. Wrong decision to me but, who knows...

I also think it is a wrong decision, many people would have supported her if she attended. The Diana circle need to realise that for many Diana is no longer an important part of their lives. We had to stop at one of the large supermarkets and the 'free' magazine about Diana which came with one of the papers today, was being left on the shelves. The sales assistant said people don't want them.

As for Dickie Arbiter, *********, ***********

Wasn't there several reports at early that The Queen believed the Duchess should not attend and should state with diplomatic matters.

As the queen has never been known to make her thoughts public, even through an unnamed source, I think we can discard all of those reports.

 

[Empress]

Skydragon - I am not well acquainted with the British press. Is there something wrong with Dickie Arbiter?

 

[NotAPretender]

I think Camilla should try to do something restful and peaceful that day, perhaps relax with a nice cuppa. (A suggestion I made far upthread and was roundly mocked for having made, btw.)

I think whoever the Firm has had advising them in this should be sacked without delay. It's a worse debacle than the "where's my wedding?" one of two years ago, and it was entirely preventable. Unecessary harshness on both sides of the equation have exacerbated an impossible situation, and the advisors on this matter to Charles and Camilla should be bundled out the back door with a boxed lunch and a check for their remaining vacation time.

 

[Skydragon]

Skydragon - I am not well acquainted with the British press. Is there something wrong with Dickie Arbiter?

Dickie Arbiter is one of those ex royal press aides, that because they were once employed in the job, still believe they have a right to speak for the family. If he is excluded (as he was with C & C's wedding), he becomes quite bitchy. He is on the same level as Burrell. I have to say, I was never sure whether he jumped or was pushed.

New Statesman - Diary - Jennie Bond

I scan the text and discover that it's another "old mate", Dickie Arbiter (or Arsebiter, as he's known), who is singing for his supper. And they've told him to have a go at me.
A former royal correspondent himself, Dickie turned gamekeeper for a while and worked in the palace press office. These days they beg us not to use him as a commentator because they say he doesn't know anything. Always hopelessly over-exuberant, he reportedly once got so excited in his radio days that - faced with a breaking news story - he rushed into the studio and announced breathlessly: "I'm an oil tanker. Dickie Arbiter has just sunk in the North Sea

 

[xtan]

put it this way, when i die, i make sure that in my will, i will state it very carefully that my husband's mistress must never attend my furneral/memorial... i don't want to see when even when i am dead!

 

[Elspeth]

Well, this really is the worst of all worlds. Looks as though Charles and Camilla are bowing to the worst sort of public opinion stirred up by the most strident Diana partisans and fanned by the Daily Mail, and it seems as though they're running scared of the very people they should be ignoring. This isn't the same sort of general public feeling that was prevalent right after Diana's death, this has been a carefully orchestrated attack on Camilla, and she's publicly admitting defeat.

I think that either she should have refused the invitation at the time it was issued, for the reasons she gave today, or she should have gritted her teeth and gone through with it. Her absence won't make a lot of difference to the press and public opinion, which will be dissecting this latest development rather than concentrating on the service itself even though she won't be there. Instead, it's just sent the message that the tabloid press calls the shots where the royal family is concerned.

I think we can expect to see an unremitting campaign now from the Mail and its cohorts to make sure that the law is changed to stop Camilla becoming Queen and even, if they're bold enough, to step up the campaign to have William take his father's place in the line of succession.

Whoever came up with today's development is exercising the sort of short-term thinking that's potentially very damaging to an institution like the monarchy. Really, the royal advisors have made some blunders in their time, but this is right up there with the worst of them. I think this is asking for a very serious problem down the road, although I hope I'm wrong.

 

[Empress]

Well, I have to say that while I think that this is the right decision, and although I think that she should have made that decision in the first instance, I am dissappointed in Camilla. For two reasons, number one, by doing this she is making it more of a spectacle than need be, BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY:

I am dissappointed because while I thought her going was a bad decision, I found it admirable that she was able to make that decision, knowing the controversy it was likely to cause. I am dissappointed because she does not have the courage to stand by her decision. I think that once she made the decision it was her decision and she should have kept it.

Her doing it this way has made her take a step back in the positive forward movement that she had made for me.

Anyway, again, just my opinion.

 

[Elspeth]

I actually feel a little bit sorry for Camilla, thats a first. Well the memorial must go as planned but I must say that the Diana Circle's behaviour is an embarrassment to the rest of the Princess' fans.

But they've just scored a major victory, so I think you can expect to see them get bolder and bolder. Now they've achieved their first aim, they and their friends at the Mail and in the Murdoch press will never shut up about Charles stepping aside to let William become the Queen's heir.