Should Camilla attend the memorial service for Diana?

[ysbel]

I mean, her only contribution to Diana's life was to make her miserable by consistently sleeping with her husband, thats not up for debate it's fact.

Well a lot of Diana's miserableness came about when she and James Hewitt broke up and Camilla really can't be blamed for that.

I think the sources of Diana's misery was varied and many and I think William, as Diana's confidant, is wise enough about the sources of Diana's pain not to blame it on any one person.

William's and Harry's memories of Diana and Charles are different than ours because their relationship was different. So it follows that their memorial to her would be different than if any of us had done it.

Everybody thinks they knew Diana and a lot of people are strongly attached to her memory but the only people who really own her memory to carry it forward are her sons and her immediate family.

 

[Lakshmi]

I know it might be not exactly on the topic, but I'm unpleasantly surprised that William & Harry invited Al-fayed family member. Dodi Al-fayed happened to be just a short term liaison for their mother. It's sort of tacky to invite his family member, even maybe immoral, or I am too old fashioned...

 

[TheTruth]

I know it might be not exactly on the topic, but I'm unpleasantly surprised that William & Harry invited Al-fayed family member. Dodi Al-fayed happened to be just a short term liaison for their mother. It's sort of tacky to invite his family member, even maybe immoral, or I am too old fashioned...

Well they probably thought it was time to stop the 'war' between the Al-Fayed and the RF. They wanted maybe for people to not forget that in this car there was Diana of course but some other persons who are also terribly missed by their families.

 

[Lakshmi]

Well they probably thought it was time to stop the 'war' between the Al-Fayed and the RF. They wanted maybe for people to not forget that in this car there was Diana of course but some other persons who are also terribly missed by their families.

It supposed to be private, family event, not occasion for showing the public that there were other people in the accident and not the demonstration of peace between parties involved. Just quiet family service. Such demonstrations, including inviting Camilla brings of course more media attention, something, I guess, both princes wanted to avoid.
I also agree that it might be too early for memorial service. There are a lot of people who remember tragedy, too much pain and controversy. And Again I hope Camilla will not come. I am not against the duchess, I just think it would bring too much unnecessary media attention.

 

[TheTruth]

It supposed to be private, family event, not occasion for showing the public that there were other people in the accident and not the demonstration of peace between parties involved. Just quiet family service. Such demonstrations, including inviting Camilla brings of course more media attention, something, I guess, both princes wanted to avoid.

I agree but what I meant by this is that the grief was and is still shared by different families. It's a memorial for Diana but IMO it would be inappropriate to not allow the Al-Fayed family to take part of it. Diana's death has touch the world but what about Dodi ? OKay he's not as 'important' to the view of the public but a life is a life, there's no distinction in that.

 

[User0501]

I would like to start a poll on this question but it's a little controversial so if the moderators think it's a worthless thread that could cause some fight then delete it, no problem with me .

Camilla should not attend Diana's memorial service as she was the cause of her marriage breakup and death.

 

[ysbel]

Camilla should not attend Diana's memorial service as she was the cause of her marriage breakup and death.

Are you saying that Camilla caused Diana's death, srivishnu? That is a pretty serious thing to say. What are your reasons for saying that?

 

[love_cc]

It supposed to be private, family event, not occasion for showing the public that there were other people in the accident and not the demonstration of peace between parties involved. Just quiet family service. Such demonstrations, including inviting Camilla brings of course more media attention, something, I guess, both princes wanted to avoid.

So let Diana rest in peace. Never accuse Charles, William, Harry and the royal family anything if they want to remeber Diana in their own way without any public demonstration. Nothing about Diana is a private matter espiecally for this ten year anniversary thing. Individuals can remeber Diana in their private ways but as royal family members, William and Harry have a lot of things to think about when they remember their mother and remember Diana as a royal family member. Camilla is not there to court attention but the media will make a fuss on her about everything. Camilla is there not to change anything but Prince William and Prince Harry will be there to lead the service. Camilla is just there to support them and they probably want her there to see them achieving things.
The princes use the memorial occasion to remeber their mother and pass the message about love, compassion, forgiveness, peace, happiness,kindness. I think these are the things that people like about Diana and these are things what she brought to the people. If rembering Diana is a really private matter, it will be easier for everyone but it is impossible. Personally I hope that this time people will be more understanding and respect the royal family's way to do things not their way.

 

[BeatrixFan]

That's not what's happening though is it? We're having it rammed down our throats so that it's unavoidable which is getting to alot of people, especially when the attacks on individual members of the Royal Family are becoming more and more frequent.

 

[Madame Royale]

It also depends on how 'we' wish to percieve it, not just having it 'rammed down our throats', so to speak.

Some like Camilla or Diana, some like both, some don't like either and some just don't care. So it's very little wonder this occasion shall be of interest to some, disgust for others and not even a flicker of appeal for the rest.

 

[BeatrixFan]

But you can't deny that by broadcasting it on BBC One and ITV and filling the remainder of the day with Di documentaries, it's taking over the entire day and thus being rammed down how throats? There's simply no way to get away from it, especially when I hear Radio 1 and Radio 4 are now going to broadcast as well. Thank Goodness I thought ahead and booked a week in the sun.

 

[Madame Royale]

...it's taking over the entire day and thus being rammed down how throats?

Again, it's how you wish to look at it, which shall determine consequently what it is you make of it. You aren't that fond of Diana, nor her memory, I'd venture to say so it's no surprise that you shall look upon the broadcasting as an overkill of sorts.

One day, you said? Then it is but one day of the year...I'm sure you shall survive, 'BF'!

If you're finding it dreadfully hard, make sure to stock up on you're Bollinger! A self enduced alcoholic coma would be sure to make the day go quick for you..haha

 

[love_cc]

But you can't deny that by broadcasting it on BBC One and ITV and filling the remainder of the day with Di documentaries, it's taking over the entire day and thus being rammed down how throats? There's simply no way to get away from it, especially when I hear Radio 1 and Radio 4 are now going to broadcast as well. Thank Goodness I thought ahead and booked a week in the sun.

Just pick up a book you like not about Diana at all. And watch a DVD not about Diana at all. BeatrixFan, I think we will go through the day very soon and everything will be normall again. I don't find this summer as what I thought. Just find things to do and fill the day. It will be not as bad as you thought and probably you will find some fun. I am quite looking forward to watch the unity of the royal family,the Spencer family, and the Al Fayed family and ladies' hats during the event. We will have more news to know who will attend the services and probably we can really have a better guess about how the event will probably be.

 

[User0501]

Are you saying that Camilla caused Diana's death, srivishnu? That is a pretty serious thing to say. What are your reasons for saying that?

If Camilla didn't have an affair with Charles, Diana wouldn't go after other guys especially. If Diana didn't go after other guys, she wouldn't be dead now. Indirectly and invisibly Camilla is main cause of Diana's divorce and death.

 

[BeatrixFan]

To say Camilla caused Diana's death is totally ridiculous. Her drunk driver caused her death. By your logic, Scott Thorson killed Liberace, not AIDS.

 

[love_cc]

If Camilla didn't have an affair with Charles, Diana wouldn't go after other guys especially. If Diana didn't go after other guys, she wouldn't be dead now. Indirectly and invisibly Camilla is main cause of Diana's divorce and death.

It is very illogical to say such things. Diana was HRH The princess of Wales. I would like to admit there was a double standard for her but she should have not taken any lover if she still wanted Charles. Charles was her husband for sure but he was her future king as well. If Diana truly wanted Charles as what she said, she definitely had to keep her exclusive to Charles for all her life no matter what. Taking any lover undermined his confidence in Diana and in the marriage itself. Being the wife of a future king, Diana had to live by his standards to keep him.

 

[Charlotte1]

If Camilla didn't have an affair with Charles, Diana wouldn't go after other guys especially. If Diana didn't go after other guys, she wouldn't be dead now. Indirectly and invisibly Camilla is main cause of Diana's divorce and death.

Hmm following this logic then, Diana was the main cause of her death. If she had not done the Panorama interview then the Queen would not have written to her ( and Charles) telling them to divorce. If she were not divorced she would have had the protection of the Royal Protection squad.

Also where's the part that Diana is responsible for her own actions? Ok so Charles had an affair, Diana could have taken the moral high ground and not gone after other guys, but she didn't. Therefore following your logic she's indirectly and invisibly the cause of her death.

 

[ysbel]

If Camilla didn't have an affair with Charles, Diana wouldn't go after other guys especially. If Diana didn't go after other guys, she wouldn't be dead now. Indirectly and invisibly Camilla is main cause of Diana's divorce and death.

Well thanks for answering my question srivishnu but I kinda agree with Charlotte on this one. Diana could have done a lot of different things to respond to Camilla and Charles' affair and 99 out of a 100 hundred of them wouldn't have killed her.

 

[User0501]

Hmm following this logic then, Diana was the main cause of her death. If she had not done the Panorama interview then the Queen would not have written to her ( and Charles) telling them to divorce. If she were not divorced she would have had the protection of the Royal Protection squad.

Also where's the part that Diana is responsible for her own actions? Ok so Charles had an affair, Diana could have taken the moral high ground and not gone after other guys, but she didn't. Therefore following your logic she's indirectly and invisibly the cause of her death.

Even Sarah Ferguson gave interview and even appeared in a magazine and on TV but she is not dead. I am pretty sure The Queen told both of them to divorce not because of the interview but some other reasons which we as the public not aware of.

 

[User0501]

Well thanks for answering my question srivishnu but I kinda agree with Charlotte on this one. Diana could have done a lot of different things to respond to Camilla and Charles' affair and 99 out of a 100 hundred of them wouldn't have killed her.

Diana was a revengeful & hot-tempered person not a calm & patience person as Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York.

 

[Iluvbertie]

Even Sarah Ferguson gave interview and even appeared in a magazine and on TV but she is not dead. I am pretty sure The Queen told both of them to divorce not because of the interview but some other reasons which we as the public not aware of.

But Sarah didn't publicly condemn the Queen's son as being incapable of doing the job he has been trained to do all his life - that would be a reflection of the training the Queen had given him herself and thus could be seen as a direct attack on the Queen.

Diana brought about the divorce the instant she co-operated in the Morton book through washing her dirty linen in public. Once she had made her marriage difficulties public (and she made a conscious decision to make it all public) divorce was inevitable. It could have been more amicable if done like the Yorks but she wanted to have all the status of being a member of the RF, wanted to destroy her husband's future, and was just a plain nasty piece of work over her dealings with the RF in the early 90s. It is no wonder that the Queen insisted on a divorce.

Diana was responsible for putting herself in the position of getting in the car with a drunk driver who went too fast and killed himself and two of his passengers. To blame anyone else for her death besides those involved that evening is just plain silly IMHO.

 

[CasiraghiTrio]

Everybody thinks they knew Diana and a lot of people are strongly attached to her memory but the only people who really own her memory to carry it forward are her sons and her immediate family.

We should all take a moment to absorb these words. They express the crucial point perfectly. The memorial service is perfect because it is as it should be, organized by the two people who arguably knew her best, and therefore, it follows that the entire guest list is perfect as well.

 

[Charlotte1]

Even Sarah Ferguson gave interview and even appeared in a magazine and on TV but she is not dead. I am pretty sure The Queen told both of them to divorce not because of the interview but some other reasons which we as the public not aware of.

When Sarah and Andrew separated the announcement was "they were to separate and divorce". When John Major announced that the Prince and Princess of Wales were to going to separate it was "a legal separation and there were no plans to divorce" It was left open for Diana to remain in the royal family, ( not Sarah). The Panorama interview was in late November 1995, the Queen wrote to Charles and Diana in early December 1995 telling them to divorce. The Panorama interview was the last straw as far as Diana was concerned and therefore there was no chance of her remaining as a member of the royal family. ( Therefore indirectly, following your logic, she contributed to her death)

 

[User0501]

But Sarah didn't publicly condemn the Queen's son as being incapable of doing the job he has been trained to do all his life - that would be a reflection of the training the Queen had given him herself and thus could be seen as a direct attack on the Queen.

Diana brought about the divorce the instant she co-operated in the Morton book through washing her dirty linen in public. Once she had made her marriage difficulties public (and she made a conscious decision to make it all public) divorce was inevitable. It could have been more amicable if done like the Yorks but she wanted to have all the status of being a member of the RF, wanted to destroy her husband's future, and was just a plain nasty piece of work over her dealings with the RF in the early 90s. It is no wonder that the Queen insisted on a divorce.

Diana was responsible for putting herself in the position of getting in the car with a drunk driver who went too fast and killed himself and two of his passengers. To blame anyone else for her death besides those involved that evening is just plain silly IMHO.

When a person is sad, disappointed, frustrated and angry he / she says anything under the sun without realizing that the effects after that.

 

[User0501]

When Sarah and Andrew separated the announcement was "they were to separate and divorce". When John Major announced that the Prince and Princess of Wales were to going to separate it was "a legal separation and there were no plans to divorce" It was left open for Diana to remain in the royal family, ( not Sarah). The Panorama interview was in late November 1995, the Queen wrote to Charles and Diana in early December 1995 telling them to divorce. The Panorama interview was the last straw as far as Diana was concerned and therefore there was no chance of her remaining as a member of the royal family. ( Therefore indirectly, following your logic, she contributed to her death)

Diana blamed Camilla and the royal family blamed Diana for the divorce but one thing I am sure is that HM The Queen as the Head of The Church of England is still not happy of Charles marrying a divorcee although The Queen pretends that she is happy which is a typical motherly feeling and attitude.

 

[ysbel]

Diana was a revengeful & hot-tempered person not a calm & patience person as Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York.

Well Diana did have her moments of hot-tempered revenge but I've never thought of Sarah being a calm and patient person.

But even so, srivishnu, I think you and I are saying the same thing and we're saying that certain personality traits of Diana led to some behavior that played a factor in her death (for example, I think her engaging personality made the press more interested in her, and her desire to make a former boyfriend jealous induced her to start up with Dodi. Others who know more than I may well disagree with me.)

But then its hard to focus on Camilla as the cause of Diana's death and give that as a reason that she shouldn't attend Diana's memorial.

If you say that Camilla had an affair with Diana's husband and then she shouldn't attend because the woman who cheated with Diana's husband when she was married should not go to Diana's memorial service, then people would agree with you on the facts of the affair and your reasons would be understandable though others would disagree with you whether that would be a valid cause for Camilla not to go to the memorial service.

If you're saying that Camilla shouldn't go because she caused Diana so much pain, well; I think also that would be understandable - the affair had to have caused Diana some pain and it is strange to see people that caused a person's pain sitting at their memorial service. Though I would question whether the affair was the source of ALL Diana's pain and wonder whether the criteria of only inviting people that didn't cause pain to Diana would mean that most of the Royal Family and some of Diana's own family would be excluded from the memorial service which would also look strange.

Its just your saying that Camilla should not go because you think Camilla caused Diana's death is what does not make sense.

 

[BeatrixFan]

Diana blamed Camilla and the royal family blamed Diana for the divorce but one thing I am sure is that HM The Queen as the Head of The Church of England is still not happy of Charles marrying a divorcee although The Queen pretends that she is happy which is a typical motherly feeling and attitude.

And do you think she feels the same way about Andrew and Anne or does she only feel this way about Charles because it will add another reason to the people to have him duped out of his crown?

 

[ysbel]

Well if its all the same to the rest of you British forum regulars, I'd like to get the thread back on track to why Camilla should or should not attend and explanations for your reasons.

Asking srivishnu or any other members about their reasons for wanting or not wanting Camilla to attend the memorial service is well and good but I'd rather not see the discussion turn to something totally unrelated to the memorial or the fact that Camilla is attending.

 

[milla Ca]

Camilla should not attend Diana's memorial service as she was the cause of her marriage breakup and death.

Sorry, but i´m absolutely shocked that it is allowed for a member of TRF to say that Camilla is guilty of Diana´s death! This statement is the worst i read in this forums!

 

[Elspeth]

As long as nobody's accusing Camilla of being directly behind the alleged murder of Diana and Dodi, an opinion that Camilla was an indirect cause of Diana's death by helping create an atmosphere which led to the breakup of the Wales marriage and Diana's subsequent activities is a valid opinion. Certainly one with which many if not most people would disagree, especially in the terms it was originally stated, but that's why ysbel asked for clarification.