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  #61  
Old 07-25-2007, 08:57 AM
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Originally Posted by kimebear View Post
She can't replace Diana in their hearts, but Camilla will be standing next to Charles during these important events and it will be her that their children consider their grandmother because she will be there. It's not meant meanly, just as a matter of fact.
I don't think will encourage their future children to view or even call Camilla grandma. Diana is dead but she is still William and Harry's mother and she will be the grandmother of their children. Camilla will just be their step-grandmother. And if Diana was alive, Camilla would still be standing by Charles' side at these events Camilla on his right and Diana on his left.
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  #62  
Old 07-25-2007, 08:59 AM
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Are you being serious? William and Harry's children will be barred from seeing her and calling her Grandma? Is it cold on your planet?
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Old 07-25-2007, 09:06 AM
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Who said anything about preventing William and Harry's children from seeing Camilla where in my comment did I say that?
And Camilla won't be their Grandma so why should they call her that?
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  #64  
Old 07-25-2007, 09:10 AM
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I don't think will encourage their future children to view or even call Camilla grandma
Of course she'll be their Grandmother, step or not. I think if you ask people who have step family, they'd be quite insulted that you consider their relations to be strangers to them. I'm inclined to believe that you wouldn't feel this way if wasn't Camilla and Diana involved.
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Old 07-25-2007, 09:21 AM
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First off Camilla won't be a stranger to their children she is Charles' wife.
And personally I have a grandmother and a step-grandmother, I don't consider my step-grandmother to be my grandmother because she isn't my father's mother. It would be an insult towards my grandmother to call my step-grandmother "grandma" I call her nana out of respect for my step-grandmother and my grandmother.
So your inclination is wrong.
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  #66  
Old 07-25-2007, 09:49 AM
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Poor woman...Everyone is ready to get her to pieces. It must be very hard for her to be in the current situation she is. Every signle thing she does is compared to Lady Diana. Duchess Camilla is herself, and lady Diana was Lady Diana. The trouble here is that Prince Charles loved Camilla, not her first wife. And the medias...Oh! The medias are always there ready to make money of everyone. They needs to speak: is their work. So, if Duchess Camilla does a thing, they attacks her, and if not they does the same thing. No way...
i soooo agree with you vanessa, the poor woman has not a put a foot wrong (that i've noticed anyway) she's always kind and gracious and has stepped into a role with her own style and grace and still is cut to pieces BEFORE she even goes to the memorial. i came to this board a diana "faniac" and was surprised to find myself charmed by the duchess and now adore her. it's hard to not be happy for a couple so in love and devoted (they seem to have so much fun in their " own special world" ) she doesn't seem to need, seek, crave or gravitate to the center of attention so imo if she's there it will be to show respect and support her husband and stepsons.

if wills and harry are happy and want her there, i expect she will be respectful and dignified (its the press and some people i'm worried about, i'd be horrified if anyone booed her or caused any embarrassment to the princes

i'd like to think diana would have moved on and found happiness and so would be happy her boys to have a loving home(not palace) with supportive stepmum and step siblings and everyone would be getting along like grownups (you only need look on this forum for examples of royal couples doing whats best for the kids and being nice to each other after divorce) 10 years is a long time hopefully it will turn a page on the diana years (alto it will be interesting to see if there's a 20 year memorial service).

my thoughts on the grandmother thing only judging from my own family the children call their grandparents what the grandchildren before them does, so i'd imagine the princes children will call charles and camilla what camillas grandchildren (already on their way) calls them. i have no doubt the prince's children will consider camilla their grandmother, it is the who they will know her to be, after all she is married to their grandfather.
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Old 07-25-2007, 09:54 AM
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I'm not a moderator but I think we're going a little nowhere on the subject of Grandma Camilla so let's stay on the question which is : "Should Camilla assist to the memorial of Diana?"

Thanks alot
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  #68  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:28 AM
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Originally Posted by BeatrixFan View Post
Of course she'll be their Grandmother, step or not. I think if you ask people who have step family, they'd be quite insulted that you consider their relations to be strangers to them. I'm inclined to believe that you wouldn't feel this way if wasn't Camilla and Diana involved.
As with most families, I make no distinction between my children and my step children, nor are there any differences between my grandchildren or my step grandchildren. My husband, children and grandchildren don't seem to make any distinction either.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bbb
..... the poor woman has not a put a foot wrong (that i've noticed anyway) she's always kind and gracious and has stepped into a role with her own style and grace and still is cut to pieces BEFORE she even goes to the memorial. i came to this board a diana "faniac" and was surprised to find myself charmed by the duchess and now adore her. it's hard to not be happy for a couple so in love and devoted (they seem to have so much fun in their " own special world" ) she doesn't seem to need, seek, crave or gravitate to the center of attention so imo if she's there it will be to show respect and support her husband and stepsons.
Lovely post bbb.
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  #69  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:33 AM
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Madame Royale said it best

The Duchess of Cornwall, Charles' second wife, has been invited to the event in her capacity as the wife of the Prince of Wales, as is proper and right.

She should not attend, due to the many reasons stated previously on this site and others, by sane and reasonable parties (not frothing maniacs as some of the Duchess' equally rabid admirers pontificate.)

I agree with whoever said that she is damned if she does and damned if she doesn't. The best solution for her would be to stay home with a nice cuppa, and send an appropriate greeting. Perhaps a spray of flowers, perhaps a card. Perhaps a prayer or two for her predecessor.

Personally, I think a tremendous gesture on her part would be to take a piece of jewelry from the personal collection bestowed on her by the POW and offer it for auction - the proceeds going Diana of Wales' foundation.

And veering to the "Granny Camilla" sub-topic: my father's father remarried under circumstances remarkably similar to those experienced by this branch of the Royal Family. We never called my grandfather's second wife by any other name than her first name, Betty. We were not disrespectful to her, but we had exactly one paternal grandmother, who was laid in her grave in 1960. My grandfather's second wife (his partner in adultery) was not my grandmother, and not my father's mother.
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  #70  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:44 AM
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Regarding Camilla and her presence at the memorial service. In reading all of these posts, a familiar refrain was heard about Camilla's relationship with Diana and how she caused Diana so much pain and tragedy. We seem to have glossed over Charles' role in Diana's unhappiness, haven't we? Should he also not attend? If we're pinpointing who really made Diana miserable, then the real blame would have to Charles', don't you think? Camilla didn't make Diana miserable--Camilla was discreet and tried in the beginning to be a friend to the young princess. What made Diana miserable was that Charles did not love her as he loved Camilla --so if we're following the line of reasoning that whoever made Diana miserable should not be there, well, Charles should be at the head of the line.
However, Charles, as the father of the boys, will be there and in doing so honors Diana as an exceptional mother. Camilla is his wife, and they appear to have a very happy marriage. Secondly, Camilla is also the boys' stepmother (and they love her, they've said so themselves) and they have invited her to the event not as one of the senior members of the royal family, but as a member of their family. That is the bottom line, as I see it.
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  #71  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:51 AM
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a rabid admirer pontificating

Quote:
Originally Posted by NotAPretender View Post
I agree with whoever said that she is damned if she does and damned if she doesn't. The best solution for her would be to stay home with a nice cuppa, and send an appropriate greeting. Perhaps a spray of flowers, perhaps a card. Perhaps a prayer or two for her predecessor.
Personally, I think a tremendous gesture on her part would be to take a piece of jewelry from the personal collection bestowed on her by the POW and offer it for auction - the proceeds going Diana of Wales' foundation.....
And veering to the "Granny Camilla" sub-topic: my father's father remarried under circumstances remarkably similar to those experience by this branch of the Royal Family. We never called my grandfather's second wife by any other name than her first name, Betty. We were not disrespectful, but we had exactly one paternal grandmother, who was laid in her grave in 1960. My grandfather's second wife (his partner in adultery) was not my grandmother, and not my father's mother
It's a memorial service, what on earth would she send a card for and to whom? The flowers will have been organised and arranged by the guards chapel and again, it is not something you would do for a memorial service.
Why does she need to make any gesture and again to who.

Lets hope your grandfathers wife had a bigger capacity of love for her husbands children and grandchildren, than they seem to have had.
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Old 07-25-2007, 10:54 AM
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The bottom line is that William and Harry, who know Camilla better than anyone on here and have more right to decide or comment, want and have asked their 'wonderful' stepmother to attend this event.

Unless of course they invited her because Charles asked them to and they are doing it to please their father. They can talk the party line about how "wonderful" she is in public because it makes Charles happy and they love their father, but actions speak louder than words and Harry's absence from her big 60th birthday bash speaks volumes to me. JMHO.
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Old 07-25-2007, 10:55 AM
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Originally Posted by jcbcode99 View Post
Regarding Camilla and her presence at the memorial service. In reading all of these posts, a familiar refrain was heard about Camilla's relationship with Diana and how she caused Diana so much pain and tragedy. We seem to have glossed over Charles' role in Diana's unhappiness, haven't we? Should he also not attend? If we're pinpointing who really made Diana miserable, then the real blame would have to Charles', don't you think? Camilla didn't make Diana miserable--Camilla was discreet and tried in the beginning to be a friend to the young princess. What made Diana miserable was that Charles did not love her as he loved Camilla --so if we're following the line of reasoning that whoever made Diana miserable should not be there, well, Charles should be at the head of the line.
However, Charles, as the father of the boys, will be there and in doing so honors Diana as an exceptional mother. Camilla is his wife, and they appear to have a very happy marriage. Secondly, Camilla is also the boys' stepmother (and they love her, they've said so themselves) and they have invited her to the event not as one of the senior members of the royal family, but as a member of their family. That is the bottom line, as I see it.
Now that, IMO, is a brilliant post!
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  #74  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:56 AM
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OH, and the whole Grandma thing. . . I am a step-parent, and thusly, a step-grandmother to a beautiful three year old girl (she really is beautiful). My husband's ex-wife (the child's biological grandmother) is Grandma. I was very concerned about what the child would call me, and didn't want to offend anyone. Eventually, Morgan settled the quandry by simply calling me "Ma" because my own son calls me "Mama" and she just shortened it. The child will pick the title in many cases.
I would also like to say that problems and issues that arise between spouses who divorce and the subsequent involvement of their children in the issues and messiness involved (who must hate your father because I do!, You're mother is evil--you must hate her) should always be frowned upon. The grandchildren should not be used as tools to futher create problems by feeding off issues that had nothing to do with them. It is a juvenile way to behave. Let the child decide, and don't cloud the child's judgement with unnecessary previous history.
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  #75  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:57 AM
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Regarding Camilla and her presence at the memorial service. In reading all of these posts, a familiar refrain was heard about Camilla's relationship with Diana and how she caused Diana so much pain and tragedy. We seem to have glossed over Charles' role in Diana's unhappiness, haven't we? Should he also not attend? If we're pinpointing who really made Diana miserable, then the real blame would have to Charles', don't you think?
Very right !

We know that the boys have invited her, so the question is quite closed, maybe we should change it a little :

Do you think it's wise for Camilla to attend this memorial ?

I mean by that, she's going but do you think it's wise for her ?
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  #76  
Old 07-25-2007, 10:57 AM
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A rabid admirer pontificating? That's a very uncivil statement in what is supposed to be a civil board. I would have expected better.
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  #77  
Old 07-25-2007, 11:00 AM
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Now that, IMO, is a brilliant post!

Why THANK YOU Skydragon! I always love reading your posts and hearing you compliment mine is a true honor--thank you!
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  #78  
Old 07-25-2007, 11:06 AM
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Unless of course they invited her because Charles asked them to and they are doing it to please their father. They can talk the party line about how "wonderful" she is in public because it makes Charles happy and they love their father, but actions speak louder than words and Harry's absence from her big 60th birthday bash speaks volumes to me. JMHO.
He is in the army, his leave is limited and I am sure Camilla would have been the first to say, get your holiday with your girlfriend.

Harry wasn't towing the party line, when he told Sky and the beeb that they thought Camilla was wonderful. The questions had already been seen and approved and if Harry hadn't wanted to say anything like that, he wouldn't have approved the question that led to it.

As with most people, IWT, I have missed many birthday/anniversary parties because they clashed with my husbands leave and we were going away. Perhaps I should be upset that my son missed my birthday party because he was on leave from Afghanistan and went on holiday with his wife and my grandchildren!
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Old 07-25-2007, 11:09 AM
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TheTruth---

I do think that is would be unwise for Camilla to not attend the service. I know there is a damned if she does, damned if she doesn't feeling about it (and rightly so). This is truly a Catch 22 situation. I think she should because to not do so looks furtive and cowardly, and history will remember her that way. In some ways, her appearance her will help define how history sees her--the woman who continued to admit guilt and stayed away amid public speculation and insulted her step-son's by not attending OR the Duchess who attended, at the request of the Princes', a strong and courageous lady who put the wishes of her family ahead of some die-hard fanatics public opinions. Frankly, I know that much be said either way, but if she goes it makes her look like a true family person, who will support her family no matter what. I cannot see her not going--she will be there.
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Old 07-25-2007, 11:11 AM
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A rabid admirer pontificating? That's a very uncivil statement in what is supposed to be a civil board. I would have expected better.
I suggest you take that up with
Quote:
Originally Posted by NotaPretender
not frothing maniacs as some of the Duchess' equally rabid admirers pontificate.)
post 70.
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