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  #121  
Old 02-03-2009, 01:31 PM
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You know, if you really have such little knowledge of the relationship between the Spencer family and the royals, I think you should be finding & reading some good biographies of Diana. Start with "Princess" by Robert Lacey & then move on to some of the later ones. You need to understand a lot more about the background of the family to really see the dynamics involved - and great as these boards are there is a lot of information that you should catch up on.
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  #122  
Old 02-03-2009, 04:12 PM
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The MIL/DIL dynamic is a difficult one at the best of times...even if one's MIL only THINKS she's The Queen. ;-P
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  #123  
Old 02-07-2009, 03:29 PM
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I think that Diana was very different from the Royals themselves, and very different from most people that they knew. I think they enjoyed her in the beginning, but in the end neither they, nor Diana understood each other. I think they were fonder of her than she was of them, because they had a lot of real compassion, and not the phony compassion that she sometimes trumpeted to the press. I wonder if we will ever really know the real Diana. I don't think that they did, but they saw more of it than we did. The irony is that they had more of what people perceived that she had. They felt badly for her, but found her difficult to deal with.
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  #124  
Old 02-08-2009, 08:26 AM
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I think Diana was a marvellous person in an awful family.I think all the royal family envy her very much because of her beauty,charisma,elegance,all her kindness etc.They did not deserve her.They must feel remorse of their behaviour with Diana.Diana was an angel ,Camilla and all the family destroyed her life.It is outrageous to criticize Diana.She was an extraordinary good person,with bad luck.
I will always defend her memory.Rest in peace dear Diana.
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  #125  
Old 02-08-2009, 09:10 AM
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Originally Posted by ZUBIAUR View Post
Diana was an angel ,Camilla and all the family destroyed her life.
Well, I suppose that's one way of looking at it, although far removed from reality.
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  #126  
Old 02-08-2009, 09:15 AM
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Well, it's totally subjective to express things this way Zubiaur. I really don't believe a whole family can be true evil and just a person true angel. Many facts prove your theory wrong: the Panorama interview is fair enough. I believe there were very good moments shared in the RF with Diana, as there were very bad ones. The family made of individuals can not be completely negative, and Diana can't be positive as you seem to think. A manichaean point of view is rarely demonstrative, at least concerning human beings.
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  #127  
Old 02-09-2009, 01:00 PM
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I think Princess Diana was a wonderful person but I beleive the British Royal Family was jealous of her popularity and also was jealous with her kindness and caring toward people and children that she cared deeply about. That's what the British Royal family lacked.

{deleted off-topic on Camilla}
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  #128  
Old 02-09-2009, 01:44 PM
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Wrong on so many counts!
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  #129  
Old 02-09-2009, 02:08 PM
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Originally Posted by ChantalC View Post
I think Princess Diana was a wonderful person but I beleive the British Royal Family was jealous of her popularity and also was jealous with her kindness and caring toward people and children that she cared deeply about. That's what the British Royal family lacked. {deleted off-topic on Camilla}
{deleted off-topic answer on Camilla}


I also don’t think that the Royal Family were ever jealous of her, I think it was more a case of not know what to do with her. She didn’t seem to fit in with them, which isn’t all that uncommon in families between in-laws but the fact that this family is who it is meant that it all became a bit of a public spectacle.
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  #130  
Old 02-09-2009, 02:22 PM
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Much can be said about the relationship between Diana and the rest of the royal family but we will never know exactly how things were between them. It is easy to look back over many years with a clouded judgement and even at the time of all the problems no-one outside their circles would really know or understand. Certainly those who have sought to gain financially by "spilling the beans" or writing un-authorised biographies cannot be entirely relied upon. I know that Diana was only 19/20 when she married in to the royal family, but she did know them well through family connections and would have some idea of what to expect in terms of relating to them. Of-course, it is undoubtable that she was probably the most popular royal ever and always will be but I simply cannot believe that her life was made hell because of jealousy on the part of the royal family. Surely, most jealous people try to gain what the object of their jealousy has by way of popularity etc and try and act and be like that themselves. It's very complex indeed and I only wish things had been handled better all round like the Joachim/Alexandra divorce.
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  #131  
Old 02-09-2009, 02:40 PM
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Originally Posted by ChantalC View Post
I think Princess Diana was a wonderful person but I beleive the British Royal Family was jealous of her popularity and also was jealous with her kindness and caring toward people and children that she cared deeply about. That's what the British Royal family lacked.

{deleted off-topic on Camilla}
sorry chantal , all what you say is wrong i think no one can know the reality of the relation betwen the RFand diana , we didn't live with theme and also we don't know the true personality of diana

{deleted off-topic answer on Camilla}
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  #132  
Old 02-09-2009, 05:33 PM
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i think the relationship between diana and the RF was ok...not perfect by any stretch but ok. totally different personalities and family dynamics...diana and her siblings had things pretty easy...not much emphasis on education for the girls and we all know the marital situation between her parents. as for the RF...more emphasis on education (certainly for the men, not sure about anne) but also a bit more family oriented (as strange as that sounds). while the HM and the DoE may not have been the most hands on parents prone to public displays of affection, the family certainly seems devoted to one another. i think these contrasts made it hard for the RF/diana or diana/RF to understand one another. but no question that there was mutual respect in terms of the roles they played).
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  #133  
Old 02-10-2009, 08:28 AM
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Once again, every time there's a subject on Diana it needs to be turned into a debate over Camilla. Please, read the title again: Diana's relationship with the Queen and and other members of the Royal Family. This was before Camilla married Charles, and so before Camilla being a member of the RF. Logically, she has no place in the conversation, even less when mentioning her starts yet another fight.

Any other post of this nature will be deleted immediately.

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  #134  
Old 02-10-2009, 01:06 PM
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IMHo there were two kinds of relationships Diana had with the queen and the DoE. There was the private one: mother-in-law and father-in-law to daughter-in-law and there was the more formal one of souverain and consort with the wife of the heir to the throne.

These were mixed of course. But while I think in the beginning the queen had a lot of understanding for Diana and if she couldn't understand her, at least had sympathy for her, while the DoE is known to have a very soft spot for younger ladies of the aristocracy and the way they enjoy life. But the longer Diana worked actively and sometimes aggressively for her own ends, not content with the place the souverain had given her in the Royal sphere but wanting to create her own "court", no matter how, the queen surely must have started to see the danger Diana posed for the monarchy and that the successor of Elizabeth I and Mary Stuart could not condone. That surely had an influence on their private relationship.
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  #135  
Old 02-10-2009, 04:58 PM
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Your post makes a lot of sense to me, Jo. There came a point where the Queen's role as Her Majesty had to take precedence over any sense of affection for Diana or a desire to keep the Wales marriage going as it was.

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IMHo there were two kinds of relationships Diana had with the queen and the DoE. There was the private one: mother-in-law and father-in-law to daughter-in-law and there was the more formal one of souverain and consort with the wife of the heir to the throne.
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  #136  
Old 02-28-2009, 12:27 PM
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It's been said The Queen had serious reservations about Diana from the beginning, including the fact she was very young, hadn't really done much with her life yet and was known to be quite willful. But she didn't press her case and did like Diana personally, so the marriage proceeded.

I think The Queen was very sympathetic to Diana and made a lot of effort to accomodate her (some have said too much), but at the end of the day, the monarchy had to come first. Diana became very bitter and angry and lost her sense of perspective and that damaged the monarchy.
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  #137  
Old 02-28-2009, 03:36 PM
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It's been said The Queen had serious reservations about Diana from the beginning, including the fact she was very young, hadn't really done much with her life yet and was known to be quite willful. But she didn't press her case and did like Diana personally, so the marriage proceeded.

I think The Queen was very sympathetic to Diana and made a lot of effort to accomodate her (some have said too much), but at the end of the day, the monarchy had to come first. Diana became very bitter and angry and lost her sense of perspective and that damaged the monarchy.
i think you've hit the nail on the head. i think that just because she didn't the kind of appreciation "she" thought she deserved she felt she didn't get any.
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  #138  
Old 02-28-2009, 05:02 PM
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I think that Diana had a personality that goes along with her bulimia. She was a very "all or nothing" type. I remember one of her friends saying in an interview something to the effect that you were either one hundred percent on her side or she considered that you were against her. I think that this is why she had such trouble sustaining relationships -- she was too quick to throw in the towel if she perceived "disloyalty." This may have been one of the problems that she had with the Queen. The Queen may have been extremely supportive and sympathetic, but if she did not take Diana's side completely, Diana would have viewed the Queen as "against her." I know several people with this kind of all or nothing personality, and it really ends up very sad.
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  #139  
Old 02-28-2009, 08:47 PM
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This would be a hard way to live, I think. It's certainly a perfectionistic view of people.

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I think that Diana had a personality that goes along with her bulimia. She was a very "all or nothing" type. I remember one of her friends saying in an interview something to the effect that you were either one hundred percent on her side or she considered that you were against her.
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  #140  
Old 02-28-2009, 09:36 PM
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Diana was young, insecure and headstrong. I once knew someone like that, but I grew up, because I had a loving husband and a wonderful family. Charles was a zero for anyone, but himself and the others really didn't deal with this kind of "stuff". Stiff upper lip and all that. So, in the end what could have been good ended in tradgedy. The stiff upper lip crowd continued after the blip in their lives disaapeared and Charles got what he wanted in the first place.
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