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  #341  
Old 08-06-2013, 08:12 PM
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We will never know if Diana fell for anyone (or for that matter, whether everyone has the same definition of love). There are people we enjoy and can tolerate being around, and if that's all you know, you might mistake being able to stand someone for being in love.

Like many people, both Diana and Dody had other things on their mind (suitability, power, money) in addition to "falling for each other." Indeed, it's possible both thought that those other things were more plausible/probable (just like a lot of other people).

Lots of people are confused about what love means and many never figure it out - nor can anyone else say whether they have or not.
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  #342  
Old 08-06-2013, 08:29 PM
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Originally Posted by PrincessKaimi View Post
Lots of people are confused about what love means and many never figure it out - nor can anyone else say whether they have or not.
Perhaps Charles was right on the money then when he said "whatever in love means". Its really a personal journey and is different for each person.

All we really can do when discussing the lives and times of people that are of interest to us and will probably never really know personally is to give our own views and ideas on what may have or may not have been. It does make for some interesting insights and discussions though and that's what we're here for.
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  #343  
Old 08-06-2013, 08:42 PM
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Diana wanted to be loved, so badly, she never felt loved. She had a plethora of men, none of them, including Charles that loved her before themselves. In fact, most of them used her, including Charles, brood mare, show piece, were personally selfish. Diana never had the security within herself or to love herself, so that she could go forward and be herself. Today, she would know that her sons love her, unconditionally, but it is too late.
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  #344  
Old 08-06-2013, 08:50 PM
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Originally Posted by Mirabel View Post
Yes!! I've always thought the same thing.

With Dodi Fayed, I felt she was truly scraping the bottom of the barrel. But even before that, her choices were bizarre.

Many men seemed to see her as a trophy; I can't think of a single one with whom she could have had a deep, loving relationship (and that goes double for Khan, because there is something very creepy about him. I suspect he's a narcissist of the first rank).
Of all the different kinds of men she had to choose, she invariably picked the loser. I read on "Diana on the Edge" that she picked men with wives or fiancées or serious girlfriends because psychologically she enjoyed humiliating the women in the relationships and this gave her the greatest satisfaction. According to one of the pyschiatrists, a lot of this was about hurting her mother for leaving her. It is a very interesting book.
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  #345  
Old 08-06-2013, 08:51 PM
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I really do think Diana would've found love in her life, had she lived. Some of her friends think she was still in love with Charles (so did I) and would've went back to him, if, he'd given up Camilla and wanted to put their family back together.

I just feel bad Diana got involved with that Fayed family. Then again, I have to show some respect for that family because Dodi also lost his life. I just don't think they were in love and was going to get married. I think that was a fantasy created by his father and part of his grief.
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  #346  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:02 PM
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Originally Posted by PrincessKaimi View Post
Diana appears to remain an irresistible focus for posthumous and amateur psychoanalysis.
She is an interesting person. A tragic figure. And she is historic. Read Diana on the Edge. It is a psychological analysis of Diana done by professionals. It wipes away the cobwebs of her mythology. It's very sad story. It was published in the year or two before her death.
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  #347  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:17 PM
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I just feel bad that so many people have made a great deal of money and careers made off of Diana's private life. There's been endless books and articles published about her marriage and the affairs. There's been documentaries and movies made about it too.

While Charles has moved on with his life and re-married, the media continues to paint Diana has a total tragic figure and as a total mistake. I like that William & Harry have tried to make the world remember her as a good mother and humanitarian.
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  #348  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:20 PM
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I think what is awful is that some many believe that they have to be in one camp or the other. Life isnt that cut and dried.

They should learn from the two sons and move on.
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  #349  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:33 PM
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Originally Posted by cepe View Post
I think what is awful is that some many believe that they have to be in one camp or the other. Life isnt that cut and dried.

They should learn from the two sons and move on.
It's why I think if we're going to talk about the affairs, it should be done fairly. I don't believe it's fair to lay some much blame on Diana and make it seem like Diana was just a total mess.

I too think it's best to move on because I think Diana is now in a place full of love and passion. She may not have found personal love here on earth but I think she found it where she is now.
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  #350  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:37 PM
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...the media continues to paint Diana has a total tragic figure...
This may be somewhat off-topic, but I really don't think that the media has portrayed her as a totally tragic person - I think much of the coverage of her is often positive, maybe sometimes overly so. She's very much remembered for her humanitarian work, for being a loving mother (and seeming to bring some warmth to the royal family), not to mention her style, etc.

Of course, there have been plenty of people who have made money off her personal life, but that's often what happens with public figures these days (e.g. this year is the 50th anniversary of the assassination of JFK's death, and there are books coming out that are continuing to dissect his private life in a tabloid manner). I think some friends and family write books or give interviews because they want to set the record straight on what they knew of Diana, though certainly many do it just for money. And of course, there will always be a lot we will never know, because some people have kept things private.
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  #351  
Old 08-06-2013, 09:55 PM
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There has been some praise for her and sometimes they over do it but I just think the focus is on her private life a bit much.

I just hope her memory won't be totally on who slept with who but on the fact that Diana was a hard working member of the royal family, a nice wife and mother. She wasn't perfect but she did what she had to do, despite everything.
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  #352  
Old 08-06-2013, 10:21 PM
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^^^^
I think the "nice wife" bit is very much open for debate.
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  #353  
Old 08-06-2013, 10:37 PM
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She, probably, wasn't a "nice wife" as she had an awful husband. They were both so concerned with themselves, no one got anything from either.
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  #354  
Old 08-06-2013, 10:58 PM
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...I really don't think that the media has portrayed her as a totally tragic person...
It's only natural to portray someone as tragic when she died when she was so young. But one of the reasons that so much has been written about her personal life is she made it a public issue. In fact, I think the media gives her too much credit as both a humanitarian and a mother.

I am not disparaging her charity work. She felt strongly about helping people, raised a lot of money, and educated many people about land mines and AIDS. But even when she really was involved with her charities (and that was only a few years), it never rose to the level that most of us would consider a full-time job. She often made more than one appearance in a day, so she only worked no more than 6 months out of the year. This is understandable because she had children, but the comparison to Mother Theresa is offensive.

With regard to her children, she was in many ways a wonderful, hands-on mother, but she also did things that were very hurtful.

Moreover, she is not the only member of the royal family who was actively involved in charity work. What sets Diana apart from the rest of the family was her style and her revelations about her personal life. Like it or not, those are the two facets of her character that most people will remember.
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  #355  
Old 08-06-2013, 11:59 PM
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When I said "nice wife" I meant that despite the failure of their marriage, I think Diana did her job in supporting Charles as his wife (The Princess of Wales). I think she was did a pretty good job in her royal role. I also think Camilla is now doing a great job in the role. It looks glamorous but I don't think it's easy.
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  #356  
Old 08-07-2013, 12:07 AM
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Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
Perhaps Charles was right on the money then when he said "whatever in love means". Its really a personal journey and is different for each person.

All we really can do when discussing the lives and times of people that are of interest to us and will probably never really know personally is to give our own views and ideas on what may have or may not have been. It does make for some interesting insights and discussions though and that's what we're here for.
Very well put and very wise.
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  #357  
Old 08-07-2013, 12:44 AM
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I think Diana did her job in supporting Charles as his wife (The Princess of Wales). .
Have to disagree with you on that one too. I think she went out of her way to do quite the opposite.
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  #358  
Old 08-07-2013, 01:43 AM
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Well, she did help Charles represent The Queen, UK and Commonwealth. She accompanied Charles on endless official engagements and conducted a great deal on her own. She was basically doing her job.
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  #359  
Old 08-07-2013, 02:43 AM
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Dear countess, I am not a Diana-hater. But let us see your thoughts in the other perspective also..

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Originally Posted by COUNTESS View Post
She had a plethora of men, none of them, including Charles that loved her before themselves. In fact, most of them used her, including Charles, brood mare, show piece, were personally selfish.
Well, even Diana used all of these men for something or the other. She used Charles the most. For the title, fame and position of a Princess. She would be nothing but a best-forgotten-aristocratic-kindergarten-nanny if not for Charles, right.. Even if she didnt marry Charles the only thing she was fit to do was a to be a show-piece-wife and a brood mare..Thanks to Charles atleast now she show-pieced british monarchy and brooded the future King..
And who knows for what she must have used other men in her life..
So we cannot say she is not selfish right..

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Diana wanted to be loved, so badly, she never felt loved.
Huh every human being on this planet wants to be loved "soo badly".. It depends on how much love they give others and how they chose others. If they make bad choices and have other priorities, they have no right to complain of not being loved "so badly"

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Originally Posted by COUNTESS View Post
She, probably, wasn't a "nice wife" as she had an awful husband.
And he, probably, wasnt a "nice husband" as he had an awful wife.

Hope you can see things both ways..
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  #360  
Old 08-07-2013, 11:02 AM
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I think Diana accepted Khan's image of himself; I suspect he had this mindset where he saw himself as a noble, almost saintly healer. I don't think he was a compassionate humanitarian, I think that's how he wished to be viewed, which is why I called him a narcissist.

(At least that's the impression I get with him. And I think Diana bought into that self-image, at least initially).
I see what you are saying. By nature, most doctors, particularly surgeons and cardiologists have healthy egos. But every doctor I have met is also driven by a desire to help others.

Khan has opened a clinic in Pakistan that serves people who otherwise would not be able to afford care. I think he qualifies as a real compassionate humanitarian, and I don't think it is terrible that he wants other people to view him as such. We all want other people to think the best about us.

I've seen nothing in his behavior that has made me think that he is a decent human being. I don't think the relationship with Diana would have worked out even if she had sought real treatment for her illness. I don't think Diana would have been able to live in Pakistan as the wife of a doctor.
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