Diana and James Hewitt

[pinkie40]

Revenge is plausible enough....and greed perhaps.

 

[ysbel]

OK, allow me to play a little Devil's Advocate if I might.

I've heard that Diana did the Panorama interview in front of the whole world, that she was only telling her truth about her relationship with Charles and the Royal Family and even if it wasn't THE TRUTH, it was her truth and if she wanted to tell the world her truth and her relationships, she had every right to. And I heard that one reason was as revenge for Charles announcing on TV that his marriage was irretrivably broker and that another reason that Diana did the Panorama interview was to manoever into a more favorable divorce settlement form the Royal Family which she eventually did to the tune of $20 million.

James Hewitt had a relationship, he had his truth even though it doubtlessly wasn't THE TRUTH, he may have wanted a more lucrative financial settlement (although he didn't get anywhere near $20 million) and he may have wanted revenge for being dumped.

So my question is: Why is Diana simply a good person who was misunderstood and made mistakes whereas the general consensus is that James Hewitt is a cad, not gentlemanly and should wipe himself off the face of the planet?

I'm no lover of James Hewitt but both Hewitt and Diana divulged intimate details of their relationships in public. It sounds like a double standard.

 

[lexi4]

OK, allow me to play a little Devil's Advocate if I might.

I've heard that Diana did the Panorama interview in front of the whole world, that she was only telling her truth about her relationship with Charles and the Royal Family and even if it wasn't THE TRUTH, it was her truth and if she wanted to tell the world her truth and her relationships, she had every right to. And I heard that one reason was as revenge for Charles announcing on TV that his marriage was irretrivably broker and that another reason that Diana did the Panorama interview was to manoever into a more favorable divorce settlement form the Royal Family which she eventually did to the tune of $20 million.

James Hewitt had a relationship, he had his truth even though it doubtlessly wasn't THE TRUTH, he may have wanted a more lucrative financial settlement (although he didn't get anywhere near $20 million) and he may have wanted revenge for being dumped.

So my question is: Why is Diana simply a good person who was misunderstood and made mistakes whereas the general consensus is that James Hewitt is a cad, not gentlemanly and should wipe himself off the face of the planet?

I'm no lover of James Hewitt but both Hewitt and Diana divulged intimate details of their relationships in public. It sounds like a double standard.

Yet another example of double standards.
Lexi

 

[Lakshmi]

James Hewitt is just a rat, who wants to get as much money as possible from his affair with late princess.

 

[Roslyn]

James Hewitt is just a rat, who wants to get as much money as possible from his affair with late princess.

I disagree. I've recognised this double standard regarding James Hewitt and Diana for some time. His problem is that a gentleman isn't supposed to talk. Well that's the ideal, but few of us are perfect. And it's much easier to adhere to those high standards if the gentleman in question has plenty of money and doesn't need income to support himself. But Hewitt isn't in that position and he lost not only his reputation but also his job and position in society because of his affair with Diana. He has to work for a living, and he needs money. He has something that can be sold and people want to buy it. Within reason, why shouldn't he sell it?

I've never thought that what he has done by talking about the relationship and writing Love and War was as bad as I think most if not all other people here do. He admits it was a big mistake to talk to Anna Pasternak.

I don't mind the bloke. He's certainly not perfect, and he's made his share of mistakes, but he admits them. He's got flaws, but so do we all. I think he's a fairly simple soul and not the brightest pea in the pod and has made some momentous mistakes - much like Diana actually - but I don't think he's a "rat". What he's done is no worse than what Diana did, IMO.

If he just wanted to get as much money as possible from the affair he would have sold the letters, and he would have written a very salacious book. He's done neither.

Roslyn,
Unofficial Defender of James Hewitt and Miscellaneous Other Lost Causes

 

[TheTruth]

I disagree. I've recognised this double standard regarding James Hewitt and Diana for some time. His problem is that a gentleman isn't supposed to talk. Well that's the ideal, but few of us are perfect. And it's much easier to adhere to those high standards if the gentleman in question has plenty of money and doesn't need income to support himself. But Hewitt isn't in that position and he lost not only his reputation but also his job and position in society because of his affair with Diana. He has to work for a living, and he needs money. He has something that can be sold and people want to buy it. Within reason, why shouldn't he sell it?

I've never thought that what he has done by talking about the relationship and writing Love and War was as bad as I think most if not all other people here do. He admits it was a big mistake to talk to Anna Pasternak.

I don't mind the bloke. He's certainly not perfect, and he's made his share of mistakes, but he admits them. He's got flaws, but so do we all. I think he's a fairly simple soul and not the brightest pea in the pod and has made some momentous mistakes - much like Diana actually - but I don't think he's a "rat". What he's done is no worse than what Diana did, IMO.

If he just wanted to get as much money as possible from the affair he would have sold the letters, and he would have written a very salacious book. He's done neither.

Roslyn,
Unofficial Defender of James Hewitt and Miscellaneous Other Lost Causes

I agree with all your points, Roslyn. He may have been too far in some of his actions although people tend to turn him in pure evil like they did for Charles and numerous persons close to Diana. Into any Di loony's mind, when she gets rid of someone it CAN'T and never be because of her. I mean, the victim role worked so well on some that it sounds impossible she could be guilty of something. Although, contrarily to what you might think, there are not enough Di loonies to convince people of his "cadness". But still, he's a man and I think when the woman population heard about what he had done, he was definitely lost. And that's what destroyed Hewitt's reputation. Quite unfair, IMO. I consider that man and woman are equal in that matter and revealing intimate details is not a thing you do, whether you're male or female. Like you said, Diana did it too, so if we blame him, in perfect logic, we might as well blame her.

 

[Jo of Palatine]

I consider that man and woman are equal in that matter and revealing intimate details is not a thing you do, whether you're male or female. Like you said, Diana did it too, so if we blame him, in perfect logic, we might as well blame her.

If we reread the "change opinion and why" and "Panorama"-thread, then it turns out that quite some people blame Diana for that.

 

[TheTruth]

If we reread the "change opinion and why" and "Panorama"-thread, then it turns out that quite some people blame Diana for that.

Well, perhaps it shows that time is the best way to see some part of "the" truth (referring to ysbel's post).

I don't catch why some fans are so tough with this guy ... He may have "betrayed" her (she did betray many more IMO) but it looks like that they had a nice time together so we can't deny this facet either. People should be thankful that he gave her some happiness for a while ... just IMO, of course.

 

[Skydragon]

I disagree. I've recognised this double standard regarding James Hewitt and Diana for some time. His problem is that a gentleman isn't supposed to talk. Well that's the ideal, but few of us are perfect. And it's much easier to adhere to those high standards if the gentleman in question has plenty of money and doesn't need income to support himself. But Hewitt isn't in that position and he lost not only his reputation but also his job and position in society because of his affair with Diana. He has to work for a living, and he needs money. He has something that can be sold and people want to buy it. Within reason, why shouldn't he sell it?

I've never thought that what he has done by talking about the relationship and writing Love and War was as bad as I think most if not all other people here do. He admits it was a big mistake to talk to Anna Pasternak.

I don't mind the bloke. He's certainly not perfect, and he's made his share of mistakes, but he admits them. He's got flaws, but so do we all. I think he's a fairly simple soul and not the brightest pea in the pod and has made some momentous mistakes - much like Diana actually - but I don't think he's a "rat". What he's done is no worse than what Diana did, IMO.

If he just wanted to get as much money as possible from the affair he would have sold the letters, and he would have written a very salacious book. He's done neither.

Roslyn,
Unofficial Defender of James Hewitt and Miscellaneous Other Lost Causes

Great post Roslyn, the only bit I disagree with is that he did try to sell the letters. Still he lost everything over the Diana affair, most of his 'friends', his career, he put it all on the line for her and then....... she dumped him. She didn't even tell him in person or by phone, just stopped taking his calls. So much for the "Yes, I adored him. Yes I was in love with him", seems to me he was just another notch on the bedpost!

 

[TheTruth]

Great post Roslyn, the only bit I disagree with is that he did try to sell the letters. Still he lost everything over the Diana affair, most of his 'friends', his career, he put it all on the line for her and then....... she dumped him. She didn't even tell him in person or by phone, just stopped taking his calls. So much for the "Yes, I adored him. Yes I was in love with him", seems to me he was just another notch on the bedpost!

Agreed but I still think she was in love with him because she had nothing to get from him (opposed to Charles's situation where it's still a controversy to know if she really loved the man or the status). He was not rich or connected to any famous people, and their "on-and-off" relationship shows that beside its instability, there was some affection that would make them stay together.

 

[Jo of Palatine]

Great post Roslyn, the only bit I disagree with is that he did try to sell the letters. Still he lost everything over the Diana affair, most of his 'friends', his career, he put it all on the line for her and then....... she dumped him. She didn't even tell him in person or by phone, just stopped taking his calls. So much for the "Yes, I adored him. Yes I was in love with him", seems to me he was just another notch on the bedpost!

Was it that way? I didn't know it but as I know your sources are impeccable (or at least you have kept more up-to-date than I have done with the media) it is a sad story, really. Was he the first "real" affair of Diana? And how was that received in the army, by his brothers-in-arms, I wonder? Did they believe in the fairytale, so he was the one to "steal the prince's bride"? Well, if I think at the consequences judging by the code of the German officers as I'm from a Prussian officer's family from one side and was interested in the past, so asked my uncle about it - he was awarded the knight's cross of the Iron Cross in WWII - not the first in the family but unfortunately for fighting for the Nazis - well, different story - they were really hard, ostracising but worse still the open contempt of fellow officers and their families. There have been things that simply "were not done". Tampering with a fellow officer's wife (or the Princess of Wales?) being one of them.

 

[TheTruth]

Wasn't there a scandal about Charles sleeping with Camilla while she was married to a fellow army man ? That would probably be the same thing with Hewitt since he was major, right ?

 

[Jo of Palatine]

Wasn't there a scandal about Charles sleeping with Camilla while she was married to a fellow army man ? That would probably be the same thing with Hewitt since he was major, right ?

So far, I haven't heard of it. A lot of things happen in closed circles and as long as the parties involved are "discreet", nothing unpleasant happens. But with Hewitt/Diana alot of things became public and that changes the atmosphere with a circle. Call it doube standards and you're right on target, but that's the way mankind works. As for Charles/Camilla: I doubt that that many people were "in the know".

 

[TheTruth]

So far, I haven't heard of it. A lot of things happen in closed circles and as long as the parties involved are "discreet", nothing unpleasant happens. But with Hewitt/Diana alot of things became public and that changes the atmosphere with a circle. Call it doube standards and you're right on target, but that's the way mankind works. As for Charles/Camilla: I doubt that that many people were "in the know".

Even if they've faced some obstacles, I doubt Diana would have let down Hewitt just because we had told her it was not tolerated by the army rules to sleep with an army fellow of your husband's. She was far to rebellious to do what she was told. So I believe we'll never figure out why she ditched him ...

 

[Roslyn]

Great post Roslyn, the only bit I disagree with is that he did try to sell the letters.

As I understand it, he hadn't made their existence public in the 7 years before they were stolen from the safe in his home while he was overseas by his then girlfriend, aided and abetted in the burglary by the Mirror after she'd offered to sell them to it for 150,000 pounds. The Mirror then double-crossed her though, and gave the letters to Kensington Palace and Hewitt had to endure a legal battle with the Estate and Diana's family and the Palace, as well as the press and public opinion, to get them back.

He talked about the letters in an interview with Larry King, and I've also seen another interview with him where he discussed them but I can't remember who that was with. I don't think he wants to sell them and I don't think we'll see them on E-bay, but I also think he would consider it if someone offered him enough money and he really needed money at the time. They are, after all, his property to do with as he wishes.............. except publish the contents! That's the thing. Neither he nor anyone he sells them to can publish them, because the Estate owns the copyright and woe betide anyone who does publish the contents.

The bottom line is that Diana shouldn't have written love letters to someone while she was married to Charles. She was sending these intimate letters to the Gulf during the War! Silly, silly girl.

Basic rule: Never commit to writing and send to someone else (thereby relinquishing control) something you wouldn't be happy to see produced in Court in answer to a subpoena, or printed on the front page of a newspaper.

 

[tan_berry]

Harry still doesn't look anything like his father.

Lucky boy, he looks like his handsome uncle.

 

[Skydragon]

Was it that way? I didn't know it but as I know your sources are impeccable (or at least you have kept more up-to-date than I have done with the media) it is a sad story, really. Was he the first "real" affair of Diana? And how was that received in the army, by his brothers-in-arms, I wonder? Did they believe in the fairytale, so he was the one to "steal the prince's bride"? Well, if I think at the consequences judging by the code of the German officers as I'm from a Prussian officer's family from one side and was interested in the past, so asked my uncle about it - he was awarded the knight's cross of the Iron Cross in WWII - not the first in the family but unfortunately for fighting for the Nazis - well, different story - they were really hard, ostracising but worse still the open contempt of fellow officers and their families. There have been things that simply "were not done". Tampering with a fellow officer's wife (or the Princess of Wales?) being one of them.

Unfortunately for Major Hewitt, he was ostracised once the affair became known by his fellow officers, instead of just strong suspicion. I expect that when he swore 'on his honour' that nothing was going on, people believed him, preferring to see an innocent friendship rather than a betrayal of all they held dear. His membership to many of his Clubs was also withdrawn. To a lot of officers they were committing an act of Treason and they didn't want to be seen as aiding and abetting them!

I do believe that Mannakee was her first affair, but it was nipped in the bud pretty quickly, another reason for Diana to be upset. people also seem to forget about Gilbey. I do think that she was really taken with James Hewitt, the dashing officer, but when she was made to really think about the consequences of continuing the affair, she preferred to follow Princess Margarets lead.

 

[Skydragon]

The bottom line is that Diana shouldn't have written love letters to someone while she was married to Charles. She was sending these intimate letters to the Gulf during the War! Silly, silly girl.

Basic rule: Never commit to writing and send to someone else (thereby relinquishing control) something you wouldn't be happy to see produced in Court in answer to a subpoena, or printed on the front page of a newspaper.

Very good advice, the same goes for emails, you never know who might get to read them!

 

[Mermaid1962]

Maybe...or something....

That they are not knives and forks?

 

[Mermaid1962]

He has Charles's close-set eyes, eyebrows, and a similar voice.

Harry still doesn't look anything like his father.

 

[emmalisa]

I have seen many photos of Harry looking very much like prince Charles. If you take a picture of Harry, cover the hair area so that only face can be seen, you will see the similar facial structure as of his father. It will be even more obvious when he gets older.

 

[TheTruth]

Very good advice, the same goes for emails, you never know who might get to read them!

Absolutely .

Although, I don't know how she could have talked to him not via writing letters ... . I've heard she had phoned him once but I'm interested to see how we could know that.

To come back to Gilbey, their affair went on from 1988 to 1989 approximately, which means just after Hewitt had left for Germany. But I've never understood how she jumped from Gilbey to Hewitt again. It was much easier to keep the car salesperson and avoid all the problems linked to the army by having an affair with a major. Moreover, he has still left for the Gulf war after coming back from Germany. Was she so in love to tolerate another goodbye ?!

 

[zembla]

Despite how much he is looking like his father, I'm sure the doubt will always nag him.

 

[LadyCat]

I think perhaps the doubt will nag others far more than Harry. I imagine he is quite comfortable in the knowledge that Charles is his father.

Cat

 

[zembla]

I think perhaps the doubt will nag others far more than Harry. I imagine he is quite comfortable in the knowledge that Charles is his father.

Cat

There has been a lot of reports to suggest it does bother him at times. The After Diana book really details his trauma over the rumors...

 

[MARG]

There has been a lot of reports to suggest it does bother him at times. The After Diana book really details his trauma over the rumors...

These reports were where? By whom? Not Harry!

 

[LadyCat]

There has been a lot of reports to suggest it does bother him at times. The After Diana book really details his trauma over the rumors...

I haven't read the book but based on most of the reviews the author, Christopher Anderson, was another of those to rely heavily upon "anonymous sources." I also believe that particular book was said to be hardly flattering to anyone but Diana. If this is the only source of Harry's trauma regarding his paternity I would have to accept it with a healthy pinch of salt.

I personally think it was rather tacky of the author to include anything regarding Harry's paternity in his book since that can only be based on speculation, gossip and rumor.

Cat

 

[zembla]

These reports were where? By whom? Not Harry!

...then we should completely ignore anything by "sources"...these threads exist on the discussion of articles like that. Of course he won't publicly talk about this......his family would freak on him!

 

[Thomas Parkman]

Well, good people, the subject is just plain tacky. The fact of the matter is from all reports Charles and his sons are close to each other. There is one wonderful picture I think that they sent out at Christmas that indicated not only great humour but great affection.

As for Harry not looking like his father, well my brother does not look at bit at all like my late father. One is rather short and stocky and the other tall and rather slender. Etc. Does this mean my brother, who takes very much after my mother, is not my father's son. How silly can you get. What the point of all these speculations is is beyond me. Except perhaps to cause embarrasment and pain where there has been enough already. It is quite obvious that both Charles and Diana, whatever their shortcomings, both loved and cared deeply about their sons and these emotions were reciprocated by their children. What more need be said??? Cheers.

 

[Lord of Cowley]

Sorry to disappoint you, but Tan Berry's picture is not a picture of Charles Spencer; it is a picture of Prince Harry as a child.