The Hypothetical Question of Prince William Living with his Girlfriend

[sapphiya]

There would be other possibilities. For example having a sexual relationship with ONE woman (who at present is Kate), but without living together (but she could live with him sometimes as a guest - I think it's different - BUT having TWO rooms OFFICIALLY).
Or - this would be the best one - having no sexual relationships at all. But perhaps this is too demanding for some people.

In any case, the reason because I don't like the idea of them living "officially" together as husband and wife is that this would be a clear statement from them: marriage is not needed. I don't think this is the right message.

Personally, I like your choices, and agree with them fully on every level (as I believe in marriage first and lived it); but you're right, it is too demanding apparently for most people, so that's why I asked the question, in response to the posts which suggested that as the future head of the Church of England William should sow some wild oats before he settles down with one person. (At least that's the impression I received from the posts, although I may have interpreted wrongly).

It just does not seem to me that the two arguments can co-exist peaceably. I was being a bit sardonic, I admit. It did strike me as a bit of a paradox. Please forgive me.

At the same time, it has just struck me that living together may not be a "clear message" that they do not need to be married. After all, if that were the case, who would least have needed to be married than Prince Charles and the Duchess of Cornwall after conducting a 30 year affair through two marriages?

Besides which, William knows that marriage is a must for him.
Personally, out of the options which seem acceptable to HIM at this point (because, as I've said, my personal standards are much higher), I'd much rather see him live with his future wife (possibly) before marriage than have dozens of affairs or even one long lasting one while observing the outward proprieties of a marriage amenable to the establishment or even the general public.

I certainly wish him, and Kate, a happier life in marriage than Princess Diana had being practically perfect according to protocol. But of course all of this is my own personal opinion.

I do love reading everyone else's opinion as well. Thats why these forums are so terrific, I think

After reading both the thread and the news, however, I don't think that Kate is officially moving in as much as she is being allowed to stay over occasionally, even often (perhaps even in a separate room, ostensibly, as you suggest), as opposed to being booted out by a curfew time every night she visits. Does anyone have clarification on this?

 

[sapphiya]

Hi sapphiya, I was the one who suggested William is too young and should sow some wild oats but I haven't suggested that he set a moral tone and other than being a basically decent human being and treating people with respect.

The problem with Kate Middleton is the public is putting pressure on a marriage and in this day and age they're too young. Royal watchers have commented that at William's age, Charles had undertaken a lot more official duties than William has. He is taking on the mantle of royal responsibility much slower than his father did. Living together would put more pressure on them to marry and not less and that's not good until William gets a feel for his role. If they are not suited for each other, it will be harder for her to pull out if she lives with him than if they live apart.

Being the heir to the throne puts a lot more pressure on getting married than for the average Joe. Adding the stress of living together just doubles the pressure.

Hi Ysabel. You're absolutely right and I like your posts. I really wasn't taking a personal swing at the argument. He is too young, for him.

I was just thinking that the Prince of Wales did sow his wild oats and everything else you said, and got married at 30, which I don't think anyone believes was too young, yet didn't do any better in spite of the fact that he did everything to benefit the role life gave him. Even the way he handled his second marriage at his more advanced age could have been done even better, according to many, particularly by one who has had responsibilities for so long and from a younger age than William. Remember that even at that age he married Diana because of public pressure?

Personally, I believe that even at his young age William certainly understands the consequences of making such monumental mistakes and will avoid them. His father is determined to help him to do so

He is lucky his father is there to help him have a better chance of success in his role as future king, his life and his future marriage. I believe that Charles' determination for his son to take things slower, balance personal and public personas better and have a better life in general may be precisely why William's unorthodox decisions may be the best thing for both the future king and the monarchy, personally and publicly.

I cannot see that there would be any sort of approval from Charles or the Queen for something they know would bring real problems for William and the monarchy. Perhaps they know best from personal experience and having had the burdens of the responsibilities the rest of us can only imagine?

What if they are letting William do what they feel they should have done to avoid the real foundation of the problems they experienced in life and the monarchy experienced in history? Is it worth considering?

I'll be looking forward to reading everyone's opinions. Thanks.

 

[ysbel]

I was just thinking that the Prince of Wales did sow his wild oats and everything else you said, and got married at 30, which I don't think anyone believes was too young, yet didn't do any better in spite of the fact that he did everything to benefit the role life gave him. Even the way he handled his second marriage at his more advanced age could have been done even better, according to many, particularly by one who has had responsibilities for so long and from a younger age than William. Remember that even at that age he married Diana because of public pressure?

Hi sapphiya,

I wasn't taking offense, I'm enjoying the discussion too. You bring up a good point. Charles was actually 33 when he married and he should have known better. The problem there lies in his character, I believe; he's the type that avoids making a decision and he pretty much avoided choosing a wife until his family decided for him. Its pretty well known that Camilla would have said yes in the early 70s IF he had asked her to marry him but he didn't. He may have had to fight his family because Camilla had had other relationships but he didn't even try.

He can form meaningful relations with women but he always stopped at asking them to marry him. It puts a woman in an awkward position; its hard for a woman especially a commoner to say the heir to the throne, hey let's get hitched.

I hope that William does not have that indecisiveness in his character as Charles does. If so, he's in for a bumpy ride.

 

[Mapple]

I agree with sappiya that an example of his father can show William how not to handle his private life. Indeed, in this day and age the tabloids will be happy to report the possible 'sowing of wild oats' by William in most racy terms.

If he has truly found the love of his life, it's better for him and Kate to marry as soon as possible. If not--he must not be pressurised into matrimony by mass media, and there will be no alternative to separation (the likelihood of another behing-the-scenes, three-decades-long relationship is against the theory of probability ).

They'll have to decide--unfortunately, the attention of the press isn't going to wander.

 

[ysbel]

Indeed, in this day and age the tabloids will be happy to report the possible 'sowing of wild oats' by William in most racy terms.

As long as he's not married they can report the racy stuff but it won't really damage him. If he is married and he's still frolicking around, there could be problems.

 

[Mapple]

As long as he's not married they can report the racy stuff but it won't really damage him. ...

Yes, except the further 'celebritification' of monarchy.

 

[Duchess]

I'm sure many people would agree with you, but the fact is, they were already living together in Scotland, albeit with another couple. Prince William remains extremely popular with the public, so it's likely that he will get away with continuing the arrangement.

Who knows if the Sovereign will remain Head of the Church of England after the death of the Queen? There have been reports that Charles feels very strongly the Church should be deinstitutionalized from the Crown so as to more accurately represent a diverse society of many religions. There have been suggestions he would like to be crowned as "Defender of All Faiths" to represent all of the British people. This would be very controversial though.

all well and fine if the monarch is no longer the head of the church but for now the monarch is and william should be abiding by the teachings of the church. as for the fact that he lived with kate in scotland it was a bad idea then and it's a bad idea now.

 

[ysbel]

Yes, except the further 'celebritification' of monarchy.

ah mapple, there's a problem. Oh well, I'd just rather William have all his fun with the ladies now rather than wait till he's married like Charles and find out he can't live with the woman everyone believes is his fairytale princess. That's a disaster that the royal family can't afford to have happen again.

 

[tiaraprin]

ah mapple, there's a problem. Oh well, I'd just rather William have all his fun with the ladies now rather than wait till he's married like Charles and find out he can't live with the woman everyone believes is his fairytale princess. That's a disaster that the royal family can't afford to have happen again.

Yes that would be a disaster that the Royal Family cannot go through again. Right now, William is treading in waters between duty to himself and duty to his country. In order for William to do his duty to his country, he has to give himself some happiness and experience. The problem lies in judging how far can/should he go in seeking that personal happiness. It is a minefield. We can't have him be as his father, but yet we can't have tread too far into a public relations fiasco. This is an uphill battle for William.

 

[polop]

Yes that would be a disaster that the Royal Family cannot go through again. Right now, William is treading in waters between duty to himself and duty to his country. In order for William to do his duty to his country, he has to give himself some happiness and experience. The problem lies in judging how far can/should he go in seeking that personal happiness. It is a minefield. We can't have him be as his father, but yet we can't have tread too far into a public relations fiasco. This is an uphill battle for William.

Yes,very true.But at the same time something like this could've been done without upsetting so many people.Kate could've gotten an apratment somewhere near where ever they live now.It seems like the royal family just wants to make itself happy,public relations is something that they have to deal with.They should realize that people they are upsetting are the same people who pay for their vacations,parties,cars etc.

 

[Elspeth]

Depending on Kate's financial situation, if she did get an apartment near Clarence House it'd have to be subsidised by William or Charles anyway. Real estate in that part of London is too expensive for most of us to have a hope of affording.

 

[polop]

I think it is still speculation, have not read a thing about it in the english press.

But to speculate further: it is possible that she will get her own set of rooms in Clarence House.

Rooms?? When and why?????

 

[polop]

I hope they don't get married.It seems like she is using him,to me.

 

[Idriel]

I hope they don't get married.It seems like she is using him,to me.

Why do you have this impression?

 

[polop]

Why do you have this impression?

Well,she has come a long way,from thinking about him[william]in her fancies,to living with him for more than 2 years?I do understand this could be her luck and fate,but half of fate is choice.She has made many choices that have lead her to where she is today.Right after they graduated,Kate had no where to go except with William?It seems like she is "avaliable" for him whenever he needs her.Ofcourse she seems like the perfect girlfriend now,because she is a girlfriend.I know it seems like a negative comment,but if she really is making him happy,then I wish both of them nothing but good luck.

 

[Aussie Princess]

I think it's a bit of a non issue, William and Kate couldn't possibly reach the same level of scandal as Charles and Camilla could they?

 

[tiaraprin]

I think it's a bit of a non issue, William and Kate couldn't possibly reach the same level of scandal as Charles and Camilla could they?

Let's hope not!!

 

[Amina]

Yes that would be a disaster that the Royal Family cannot go through again. Right now, William is treading in waters between duty to himself and duty to his country. In order for William to do his duty to his country, he has to give himself some happiness and experience. The problem lies in judging how far can/should he go in seeking that personal happiness. It is a minefield. We can't have him be as his father, but yet we can't have tread too far into a public relations fiasco. This is an uphill battle for William.

I agree with you. The press are putting far too much pressure on Wills and Kate to marry. As for her getting royal security if she moved into Clarence house. I believe that the Duchess of Cornwall did not get any security until she married Charles. Even now she has just one bodyguard. I heard this on the Radio in London. Diana did not get any security until she was officially engagded to Charles. So Kate would not become a financial burden to England. Personally i think if they want to live together - why not?

People here are saying that Wills would be setting a bad example by living together before marriage as future head of the Church of England. The fact is he has already lived with Kate. Yes, they shared a house with other people but they still holidayed together. I believe that they will live together somewhere in London. Whether or not they will marry is another issue. Personally i don't see them getting married. This is Wills first serious relationship, he'll probably want to date other women etc before settling down.

 

[sara1981]

William and Kate can share house at Clarence house because she had clothes at William's apartments and both still holidays but what you think her parents of William? and Prince Charles and HM Queen really adores of Kate very much!

Sara Boyce

 

[CasiraghiTrio]

William and Kate's relationship

I don't agree with it and I hope it is not true. unfortunately, thanks to the great example dad and wife have set, these are the kinds of things that will be allowed in the RF. I hope it is not true. Why would the Queen allow it? Yes Kate is a wonderful girl, but we need (and do) to see that she can live on her own not be immeditaly under the auspices of Clarence House andthe BRF. Personally, I think living together b/f marriage takes out the excitement of seeing how life is after marriage. But I hope this is not true. They need to take the relationship a bit slower if William still wants to wait to get married until 28-30

They have been taking the relationship on a reasonable speed! Goodness, they lived together for what, 3-4 years while they got their degrees. Their relationship is something like 2 years old. I don't call that "rushing things" exactly. If they lived together before, what's the difference now?

 

[polop]

They have been taking the relationship on a reasonable speed! Goodness, they lived together for what, 3-4 years while they got their degrees. Their relationship is something like 2 years old. I don't call that "rushing things" exactly. If they lived together before, what's the difference now?

Quite personally,I think the difference now is that,before people could handle them living together since they were sharing the apartment with another couple,but now,it's just them too,going out of there ways to live together.Again,this is how I view the situation,so I could be wrong.

 

[Feberin]

I'm surprised they're telling everyone that they are living together. I don't see anything wrong with it but I would think the Royal Family would want this to be hush hush to prevent upsetting any church officials.

 

[tiaraprin]

I'm surprised they're telling everyone that they are living together. I don't see anything wrong with it but I would think the Royal Family would want this to be hush hush to prevent upsetting any church officials.

Compared to his father and numerous ancestors, what William is doing is a drop in the bucket compared to them!!!

 

[segolen]

True. But we really don’t need to compare them both

 

[Feberin]

Compared to his father and numerous ancestors, what William is doing is a drop in the bucket compared to them!!!

Agreed and I don't think there is anything wrong with it at all. But sadly I bet there are people who do.

 

[segolen]

...and " sadly" we have some people who belive we should.


So…according to you Wills can mess up in the future, but as long the mess is not as big as his father's was it is acceptable….hmmm ….
i 'm trying to see your logic in here.

 

[tiaraprin]

Quote:
Originally Posted by segolen
...and " sadly" we have some people who belive we should.


So…according to you Wills can mess up in the future, but as long the mess is not as big as his father's was it is acceptable….hmmm ….
i 'm trying to see your logic in here.

What William is doing is considered by many to be a normal thing these days. This is not the 1950's. He and Kate are no longer protected by being at St. Andrew's, far away from the paparrazzi. They will have a chance of privacy and continuing to get to know each other better if they have a place that they cannot be disturbed in. If she had a place somewhere in London, the paparrazzi would be sitting on her doorstep in time shifts!!

 

[segolen]

Fine.
All of us said our opinion and we agreed to disagree about this issue. I just found it very funny that someone compared Wills with Charles on this matter. It is nothing to compare.

 

[segolen]

Quote:
They will have a chance of privacy and continuing to get to know each other better if they have a place that they cannot be disturbed in. If she had a place somewhere in London, the paparrazzi would be sitting on her doorstep in time shifts!!

Does it mean , that every girl Wills date in the future will move to the Clarence house( or the Palace, or whatever) just because for the seek of privacy. It is a very good deal then. I believe , that every girl committed to date William should know that the paparazzi would be part of her life. If she wants a normal life she should not date the heir of the throne then.

 

[tiaraprin]

Does it mean , that every girl Wills date in the future will move to the Clarence house( or the Palace, or whatever) just because for the seek of privacy. It is a very good deal then. I believe , that every girl committed to date William should know that the paparazzi would be part of her life. If she wants a normal life she should not date the heir of the throne then.

Segolen, I think it just better to agree to disagree. You aren't going to change your opinion, and I am not going to change mine. I am not in a mood for a war of words.