Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings

[Pranter]

What’s all this ‘roll out of there relationship’ stuff people refer to. No other royal relationship I know of has had a ‘roll out’.

You date, get engaged and give an interview. That’s the extent off it.

Meghan’s fans defended her about speaking to VF about her relationship with Harry as part of a palace approved interview when there was zero evidence it was approved by anyone other than Meghan and maybe Harry.

I don't think Harry would do something to bring negativity to the family at this point in his life. He's not wanting to upset the Queen or his family. I don't think there is any way they would of gotten involved in the VF interview without running it by the folks involved in these things. And if they knew the Queen etc knew.


LaRae

 

[Rudolph]

Telling the palace is different from it being palace approved. Why would the palace think it advantageous for Meghan to speak to a non-British glossy magazine about a relationship everyone knows exists?

No other royal girlfriend has needed to speak out. Just seems like self promotion to me.

 

[AlowVera]

This is true. Meghan has been more "out there" than any previous girlfriend that Harry has had. She's also the first girlfriend that had a full and varied life in the public eye before setting her peepers on Harry.

Its just a case of that Meghan Markle is the first girlfriend that actually has a public identity of her own and being Harry's girlfriend was an added feature rather than defining who her identity is. It makes all the difference in the world IMO.

Being out their is her job. Since she has become PH's girlfriend she is barely seen...unlike the other girlfriends who had a normal social life.

 

[cepe]

Being out their is her job. Since she has become PH's girlfriend she is barely seen...unlike the other girlfriends who had a normal social life.

I think that is more to do with geography. Harry's previous girlfriends were UK based and the tabloids (as usual) were all over them.

Not so in Canada (she's very lucky)

 

[AlowVera]

Being is Canada is a plus, it would be ridiculous if she was in the UK. My original point was that if MM had a normal regular social life similar to the previous girlfriends she would be crucified even more than she is now. As it stands now her life since being outed as the girlfriend has significantly changed.

 

[Pranter]

Telling the palace is different from it being palace approved. Why would the palace think it advantageous for Meghan to speak to a non-British glossy magazine about a relationship everyone knows exists?

No other royal girlfriend has needed to speak out. Just seems like self promotion to me.

If there had been any objection by the Queen et al, they wouldn't of gone ahead with it.

As to why...perhaps they thought they could take some of the pressure off by speaking of it BEFORE the I.G. and IMO it's just part of the run-up to them announcing their engagement. No other BRF royals haven't done it this way however this is a rather different situation on several levels. Plus I think Harry (and Meghan) want to do things their way to try and control as much as they can due to past experiences/situations.

Self promotion makes no sense ..she's not gaining anything from it.


LaRae

 

[duchessrachel]

If he was picturing a wedding at a waterfall, I think he'd be picturing something more exotic like Victoria falls, considering his love of Africa.

The ridiculous story about titles

Surprised took this long. Seriously, could anyone be foolish enough to believe that it may be under discussion. The queen has never made a daughter in law, not alone Kate, a princess in her own right. Like there is any chance at all that she would do it for Meghan. Of course she will be HRH Princess Henry, Duchess of X. A lazy royal reporter trying to get hits by misleading people who don't know enough about royals to know better.

Wasn't he also the reporter who made such a hoopla over Kate being listed as "Princess of the United Kingdom" on Prince George's birth certificate? He insinuated that the palace was being misleading about her title.

 

[BlytheAnne]

Telling the palace is different from it being palace approved. Why would the palace think it advantageous for Meghan to speak to a non-British glossy magazine about a relationship everyone knows exists?

No other royal girlfriend has needed to speak out. Just seems like self promotion to me.

A self promoter would have gone on the normal press tour, which she is contractually obligated to do, and which would have involved dozens of interviews - video, print, online- over a period of weeks. It would have been an absolute minefield to navigate and would have provided months of continuous fodder for the tabloids.

That she was able to negotiate it to just one interview and, whether you agree with it or not, a few innocuous lines about Harry/their relationship is best case scenario IMO.

And I would never claim anything is done with palace approval, I'm still on a pretty steep learning curve as far as the BRF goes.
If Meghan and Harry were able to navigate the sticky situation she was in on their own, then hats off to them.

 

[duchessrachel]

About that hat, Curryong. If Kay and the Fail know what they're talking about, I'll throw in a pair of gloves and join you in eating that hat.

We could also look at this from another angle. A business one. Harry has recently been stepping up and out and going places on tour representing his monarch and the "Firm". Many places here on TRF I've seen it stated that Harry is quite the up and coming ambassador of good will for the UK. Wherever he goes, people love him and are charmed by him. He resonates with people and to me, that's a prime asset when you're in the diplomatic business.

With such a public role that is destined to increase as the years pass, I think the "Firm" and the government and the courtiers and anyone with eyeballs in their head realize that Harry is not only the Queen's grandson but he's also a golden ticket to reach people. People who have met him around the globe would feel "I know this guy" sitting there watching him marry on TV. Heck, a lot of us would feel that way watching. I get that Harry treasures and holds his privacy close to his vest but I don't think he'd request a strictly private wedding and leave out his "friends" all over the globe.

To make it totally a private occasion goes against the grain of the business Harry is in. You can't expect to be able to reach people in the four corners of the earth and have a reputation for being very likable and charming and then decide to go totally against the grain of your personality and shut everyone out on a day of a senior royal wedding which by tradition in the 20th century always included the public in some ways.

Sorry Richard, ain't going to happen. Quit adding whiskey to your tea. Its messing those tea leaves up badly.

Let me throw in some shoes to eat. It will definitely be televised. Just the simple fact that she is American and that will be the only way most of America can see it. People may say that the BRF do not consider those things, but if I am wrong and they don't, I'll put some socks on my menu too.

 

[wyevale]

People may say that the BRF do not consider those things

Those responsible for the planning will consider ALL facets, since they are [above all] professionals. But ultimately this will be tailored for a British audience, since it will be British Royal occasion.
HMQ will have 'the final say' and she is not one to be carried away with hysteria...

 

[Anna Catherine]

I think the British are the most important consideration if they get married. No other country really matters. Harry’s wife will be representing the British not herself or her country of origin. International interest will be covered by having the wedding televised. Beyond that I can’t see why her being an American would factor into this wedding. I say that as an American. I want to see her embrace her new country and the people she will be serving.

Also, I don’t think the Queen or Charles were consulted on the interview. Nor am I sure they would have approved if they had been. Harry and Meghan made that decision for good or bad. KP might have been aware but I doubt they had input. It’s beyond them. KP represents the royals not Meghan (yet). I don’t think it was self-promotion but I don’t think it was necessary or particularly helpful in introducing her to the British public. But that’s my opinion.

 

[csw]

I think we're best off not comparing Meghan to anyone else because, frankly, each person is totally different and their lives are like galaxies in a universe that are far, far away from each other.

Agreed. I fully expect the Daily Fail to try to play up competition between Kate and Meghan and to report on who is the more popular, etc. Any time Meghan does something differently than Kate did - DM will report it as a criticism from Meghan to Kate. I hope the two women are a great support to each other as sisters-in-law.

 

[Alliec76]

Well here's a thought. So what if Meghan is doing things differently than other royal girlfriends? Whose to say that just because something was done in the past it's the only correct way? People act like the BRF have never in their lives ever done things differently or adapted. They wouldn't have survived this long if they hadn't. So Meghan talked and Kate didn't. So? What harm was done?

And here's another thing. If the Palace was upset or displeased about any of this, we would know. Maybe not officially on the record, but the BRF has always been able to make their feelings known about certain issues. They leak just like anybody else. They have journalist they talk to on background just like any other entity. If they were so very disturbed by Meghan and Harry's handling of their relationship the whole thing probably would have been nipped in the bud a long time ago. And we'd be hearing rumblings from "palace sources" about the family's concern and displeasure. They have done it before. There would be behind the scenes pressure to tamp down any talk of engagement. Yet we've seen none of that. In fact quite the opposite.

Comparing Meghan to any other royal girlfriend doesn't make sense because she is not like any other royal girlfriend. She is a public person in her own right, who has accomplished things in her own right, so of course she's going to be more public. She's a public person. It's her job. Her job is to promote herself. What was she supposed to do? Quit working just because she was dating Harry? She does have obligations and the need to support herself. Nope. Until she has an actual commitment i.e an engagement she has every right to continue her career and her work. If she'd stopped working people would say she's lazy or using Harry for his money. Heck people are still saying now. She can't win.

 

[Anna Catherine]

They don’t comment on girlfriends. That’s always been their stance. Whatever the BRF feel is not going to be public. Yes, she’s a public figure and has to promote herself, but the VF interview was about her relationship. That’s why she did it. I can understand what she and Harry may have been trying to do, but I don’t think it was successful. Just because she has a different background than other women in the BRF does not mean she gets to do things however she wants though I’m not necessarily blaming her. Harry should already know this. I just think the BRF does things a certain way for a reason. She has the liberty to do handle things how she wants and they aren’t going to say anything because she’s a private citizen. It doesn’t mean people can’t critic nor that it’s how the BRF would like for things to happen.

Either way, this topic has been done to death. We can all have our opinions and are entitled to them. We’ll just have to agree to disagree.

I like weddings and the tradition, history and beauty that the Royals represent so I’m interested either way whether I agree with their decisions all the time or not.

 

[Kitty1224]

I didn't need it to be "approved" or part of a roll out but it's highly unlikely that Meghan and Harry went rogue and decided she was going to do this without at least KP knowing about it.

You never know. She could have done it without KP approval. I for one think they won't get engaged.

 

[Abbigail]

Well here's a thought. So what if Meghan is doing things differently than other royal girlfriends? Whose to say that just because something was done in the past it's the only correct way? People act like the BRF have never in their lives ever done things differently or adapted. They wouldn't have survived this long if they hadn't. So Meghan talked and Kate didn't. So? What harm was done?

And here's another thing. If the Palace was upset or displeased about any of this, we would know. Maybe not officially on the record, but the BRF has always been able to make their feelings known about certain issues. They leak just like anybody else. They have journalist they talk to on background just like any other entity. If they were so very disturbed by Meghan and Harry's handling of their relationship the whole thing probably would have been nipped in the bud a long time ago. And we'd be hearing rumblings from "palace sources" about the family's concern and displeasure. They have done it before. There would be behind the scenes pressure to tamp down any talk of engagement. Yet we've seen none of that. In fact quite the opposite.

Comparing Meghan to any other royal girlfriend doesn't make sense because she is not like any other royal girlfriend. She is a public person in her own right, who has accomplished things in her own right, so of course she's going to be more public. She's a public person. It's her job. Her job is to promote herself. What was she supposed to do? Quit working just because she was dating Harry? She does have obligations and the need to support herself. Nope. Until she has an actual commitment i.e an engagement she has every right to continue her career and her work. If she'd stopped working people would say she's lazy or using Harry for his money. Heck people are still saying now. She can't win.

Well said. I totally agree.

You never know. She could have done it without KP approval. I for one think they won't get engaged.

Odds are, KP knew about it, at the very least and I wouldn't bet against an engagement but ok...

 

[Somebody]

They don’t comment on girlfriends. That’s always been their stance. Whatever the BRF feel is not going to be public. Yes, she’s a public figure and has to promote herself, but the VF interview was about her relationship. That’s why she did it. I can understand what she and Harry may have been trying to do, but I don’t think it was successful. Just because she has a different background than other women in the BRF does not mean she gets to do things however she wants though I’m not necessarily blaming her. Harry should already know this. I just think the BRF does things a certain way for a reason. She has the liberty to do handle things how she wants and they aren’t going to say anything because she’s a private citizen. It doesn’t mean people can’t critic nor that it’s how the BRF would like for things to happen.

The VF interview was certainly not about her relationship! I calculated the percentages (posted them here, so feel free to look them up) and it was a very small percentage of the aeticle. She mainly talked about Suits, her background, charity work and life in general. And she said a few sentences about her boyfriend (not mentioned by name); no time to go public yet and they are in love. VF added some general royal information and of course zoomed in on her relationship but if the point had been to talk about her relationship, she would surely have done that extensively and she didn't

 

[Grandma828]

I think Meghan will fly to London the day after Suits finishes filming and the following day the engagement will be announced with the wedding the end of February.

 

[Somebody]

You never know. She could have done it without KP approval. I for one think they won't get engaged.

It is always interesting to hear different perspectives. What makes you think they won't get engaged?

 

[Dman]

People just have to respect that Harry isn’t dating the typical young lady. He’s dating a woman who’s got her own life and career and media presence.

Funny how everyone wanted the Wales boys to date very experienced and very accomplished women. Harry he found that and there’s still complaints?

 

[MARG]

I have no doubt that KP knew about the interview in VF. However, KP is just William, Catherine and Harry! Its CH and BP that are the more important ones and this just goes to show that if ever there was a reason for having only one Royal Media spokesperson (even if they need and staff to keep up) this is it.

The percentage of the interview about Harry was about 4% and more about how she was happy and loved life. She looked like she was and to not address the elephant in the room after Harry's KP announcement last November. would have been seen as counterproductive and silly.

William and Catherine grew up and grew in love together over 8 or so years. Harry and Meghan are two stars that collided and to be suddenly in love is a wonderful thing. Meghan was not coy about telling the world she loves her boyfriend and while Harry has said nothing, what he has done speaks volumes. He and his brother are two different people with two different ways of expressing themselves. I can't wait for the official engagement announcement.

 

[Alliec76]

I think Meghan will fly to London the day after Suits finishes filming and the following day the engagement will be announced with the wedding the end of February.

Wow! That's a quick turn around time. I'm all about an engagement and wedding, but I'm not sure how I'd feel about it being so fast. I'm afraid people would think it was a shotgun wedding! LOL!

Can I ask what makes you think that might be the timeline. Genuinely curious!

 

[Empress Merel]

People just have to respect that Harry isn’t dating the typical young lady. He’s dating a woman who’s got her own life and career and media presence.

Funny how everyone wanted the Wales boys to date very experienced and very accomplished women. Harry he found that and there’s still complaints?

Because people are far too invested in the very close, personal lives of these people

 

[Grandma828]

I just look at the degree of commitment and their ages. My husband and I had a 3 month time line and I know it can be done. We also faced the questions about a shotgun wedding and it wasn't true.
There are rumours about the palace preparing an engagement announcement and I just don't think they will wait. Since I have never met either of them I don't really know. As a retired office manager I think a lot of prep work has been done. She has had time to take care of the certificates for her dogs. She has cancelled her car lease. I'll bet she has started paperwork on her visa. Her house is rented and all she has to do is have things put in storage and tell her landlord she is leaving. It is not so complicated. The timeline for a royal wedding is the only sticking point,but if they want something small and private it could be done. They just simply aren't young. I don't think they will wait.

 

[Alliec76]

People just have to respect that Harry isn’t dating the typical young lady. He’s dating a woman who’s got her own life and career and media presence.

Funny how everyone wanted the Wales boys to date very experienced and very accomplished women. Harry he found that and there’s still complaints?

Did people want that though? I'm asking genuinely. I know I wanted that. But I'm American, and as has been explained ad nauseum we apparently "just don't get the monarchy". So I don't know. Maybe that's what people in America wanted.

But honestly what truly matters is what the boys wanted. William got to marry who he wanted, conducted the relationship the way he wanted and got married and started his family the way he wanted. And there were people who complained about every bit of that. Now Harry is doing the same thing, and doing it slightly differently and there are people complaining about that. And will probably complain about how the engagement is handled, the wedding, Meghan's role etc. Because some people can't be made happy.

I fully expect for Meghan to never be fully accepted by a portion of the British public. I'm sure she and Harry will handle it just fine and they probably know it themselves.

 

[Kitty1224]

It is always interesting to hear different perspectives. What makes you think they won't get engaged?

I have a feeling.

 

[Alliec76]

I just look at the degree of commitment and their ages. My husband and I had a 3 month time line and I know it can be done. We also faced the questions about a shotgun wedding and it wasn't true.
There are rumours about the palace preparing an engagement announcement and I just don't think they will wait. Since I have never met either of them I don't really know. As a retired office manager I think a lot of prep work has been done. She has had time to take care of the certificates for her dogs. She has cancelled her car lease. I'll bet she has started paperwork on her visa. Her house is rented and all she has to do is have things put in storage and tell her landlord she is leaving. It is not so complicated. The timeline for a royal wedding is the only sticking point,but if they want something small and private it could be done. They just simply aren't young. I don't think they will wait.

I can see your points. I completely agree about the level of commitment. And yes, relationships in your 30's definitely move at a different pace. Especially when you both want a family. The problem usually comes in if one person isn't on the same page, but that doesn't seem to be an issue here. I still think we're looking at a summer wedding after Cambridge baby #3 is born, but I think you are right that it is possible all of the wheels are already in motion.

 

[Dman]

Because people are far too invested in the very close, personal lives of these people

Exactly! Far too invested indeed.

You’d think some women would like the fact that Harry is in a relationship with someone that have her own life, experiences and accomplishments.

 

[MARG]

Well Harry has only had three girlfriends of significance between the ubiquitous blonds. Chelsey when he was young, Cressida who never seemed to make him smile and used him to raise her profile.

Meghan is an adult woman, an educated woman, a woman with a successful career, a self-motivated charity worker and self-avowed feminist. That Harry has met such a woman and they have a relationship is pretty good going because I believe both of them were of a mind that "true love" was never going to be an option and then they met.

I can't wait to see what comes next!

 

[Royal Newbie]

The VF interview was certainly not about her relationship! I calculated the percentages (posted them here, so feel free to look them up) and it was a very small percentage of the aeticle. She mainly talked about Suits, her background, charity work and life in general. And she said a few sentences about her boyfriend (not mentioned by name); no time to go public yet and they are in love. VF added some general royal information and of course zoomed in on her relationship but if the point had been to talk about her relationship, she would surely have done that extensively and she didn't

Respectfully, IMHO, the ONLY reason VF asked her to do that interview was because she was willing to talk about her relationship with Harry (whether specifically named or not).

An actress in her situation would maybe get a page, or blurb, on the inside of the magazine, not the cover. Again, just my opinion.