Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings

[jacqui24]

Dianas sons:

1. Most people don't have a soft spot for William and Harry because they are Diana's sons.

2. William has been (unfairly) criticized as never before (even more than Charles) during the last 4 years, and has been called boring, uncharacteristic, lazy, workshy and an insult to the Queen's legacy. He was also unfairly criticized for the Heads Together campaign.

3. Diana wasn't even (according to polls) one of the most admired/popular persons in UK while she was alive, and both William and Harry are in fact more popular than what Diana was. The same goes for Charles before he got married.

Meghan:

As I said above, Harry is not a low-level royal. And yes, she is going to give up her acting career, but what does she get instead?

1. She's going to be married to the grandson of QEII: the head of state of 16 countries, the figurehead of 2 billion people, the most beloved, popular, iconic and most famous person in the world.

2. She's going to be HRH the Duchess of something.

3. She's going to live a life in luxury.

4. She's going to meet some very interesting people.

5. And she's going to get opportunities that not even A-list actors get.

So she doesn't sacrifice that much, does she?

Diana while alive and Diana postmortem is not the same thing. There is a reason why Camilla and Charles took a hit in the polling in August after 20 years. As for criticism toward William, can you imagine if Charles had his numbers of engagements? Whether fairly or not, the members of royal families are judged by number of engagements they undertake, and that somewhat determines their worth to the public.

As for how much she has to sacrifice, it seems to me the gains are mostly superficial without mentions of the burdens that comes with being part of BRF. What does that mean to her as a person to be married to one of QEII's grandson exactly? Again with the Duchess of whatever? These things are fun for us to muse at, but for someone to live it everyday of their lives, it's different. As for a life in luxury, she's not doing too shabby herself. Studies show that people's happiness doesn't go up in proportion to the amount of money they make after a certain point. The amount varies based on areas, but it's middle class income. Sure she'll be able to meet interesting people, but she's not doing too shabby in that area either. One of her best friends is the daughter-in-law of a former Canadian prime minister, and she's also with the current first couple of Canada. Not to mention she's met Ban Ki Moon and the list goes on. OTOH, she'll have to sacrifice the ability to state her opinion on a number of matters publicly should she take on this role. Plus, she'll be living in a fishbowl with someone criticizing everything from her hair and clothes to her speeches, often in unfair manners. She'll have to follow all kinds of stringent rules and protocols. There is no place like BRF to make one feel less than others simply by virtual of birth with their pecking order.

So yes, she is giving up a lot for love depending on how important one considers those things I stated. It seems to be sacrifices she's willing to make, which is good for both of them. However, let's not act like it's all gains and no pains.

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

1. Charles and Camilla took a hit in the polling because the press went on and on about Diana, while her many critics were left out of the coverage.

2. I was responding to Iluvbertie's post.

3. Yes, there are burdens, but also many benefits.

 

[wyevale]

An [at best] average TV actress with a 'limited shelf life' versus a Royal Duchess as part of the most prestigious Royal House on the planet, with guaranteed fame and column inches her whole life..
For someone who clearly values fame, she has MUCH to gain from such a marriage.

 

[jacqui24]

An [at best] average TV actress with a 'limited shelf life' versus a Royal Duchess as part of the most prestigious Royal House on the planet, with guaranteed fame and column inches her whole life..
For someone who clearly values fame, she has MUCH to gain from such a marriage.

So much so that she closed down multiple projects that brought her attention and income. Do we really need to keep going down the same road?

1. Charles and Camilla took a hit in the polling because the press went on and on about Diana, while her many critics were left out of the coverage.

2. I was responding to Iluvbertie's post.

3. Yes, there are burdens, but also many benefits.

1. Do you think press coverage doesn't affect public perception? It's hard to fight a dead woman.

2. I was thinking this is a discussion on the board rather than towards one specific poster. So I responded.

3. Again, most of the benefits seems superficial while the burdens are very real.

 

[Pranter]

Much factual-errors and chaos in this so-called ''Harry and Meghan: Relationship Musings'' thread. Perhaps the mods can change the name to ''All things Harry and Meghan'' thread? (And no, it was not seriously meant)

I have (as most of you know) issues with Harry's interviews etc, but I can be objective, and here is some important facts from me to things that have been discussed here in recent days:

Minor royals:

1. Harry as the son of the heir/King isn't or will never be a low-level or co-called minor royal.

2. Beatrice, Eugenie, the Gloucesters and the Kents are the ones that belong in the so-called minor royals category.

3. Will Harry be upstaged by George and Charlotte in about 20 years time? Yes, he will, and I don't think he'll have any problems with that.

Dianas sons:

1. Most people don't have a soft spot for William and Harry because they are Diana's sons.

2. William has been (unfairly) criticized as never before (even more than Charles) during the last 4 years, and has been called boring, uncharacteristic, lazy, workshy and an insult to the Queen's legacy. He was also unfairly criticized for the Heads Together campaign.

3. Diana wasn't even (according to polls) one of the most admired/popular persons in UK while she was alive, and both William and Harry are in fact more popular than what Diana was. The same goes for Charles before he got married.

Meghan:

As I said above, Harry is not a low-level royal. And yes, she is going to give up her acting career, but what does she get instead?

1. She's going to be married to the grandson of QEII: the head of state of 16 countries, the figurehead of 2 billion people, the most beloved, popular, iconic and most famous person in the world.

2. She's going to be HRH the Duchess of something.

3. She's going to live a life in luxury.

4. She's going to meet some very interesting people.

5. And she's going to get opportunities that not even A-list actors get.

So she doesn't sacrifice that much, does she?

Not being able to leave your home and do anything without the media around, anything you wear in public subject to comment, anything you do (or don't do) subject to comment, not being able to speak in public on certain topics, not being able to get involved in political issues ...there's a hefty price for that HRH title.


LaRae

 

[Osipi]

An [at best] average TV actress with a 'limited shelf life' versus a Royal Duchess as part of the most prestigious Royal House on the planet, with guaranteed fame and column inches her whole life..
For someone who clearly values fame, she has MUCH to gain from such a marriage.

Sure there are pros and cons to any major changes in life but regardless, in the case of Harry and Meghan, I think the thing she stands to gain the most is that she'll get the man she loves.

 

[wyevale]

she closed down multiple projects that brought her attention and income

Presumably on the basis she was moving on to 'greater things'...

 

[jacqui24]

Presumably on the basis she was moving on to 'greater things'...

And where are the facts supporting that presumption? I can presume that I would win the lottery, but that doesn't make it remotely likely.

 

[Cocoasneeze]

Presumably on the basis she was moving on to 'greater things'...

And what are those greater things? Has she got any new projects lined up? I haven't read of any.

 

[wyevale]

what are those greater things?

You and others here are on tippy-toes in daily expectation [fuelled by the VF article] that the couple are already affianced and that an announcement is soon to be made accordingly...

 

[jacqui24]

You and others here are on tippy-toes in daily expectation [fuelled by the VF article] that the couple are already affianced and that an announcement is soon to be made accordingly...

Yes, based on the fact that Harry released a statement last November, and it's likely that his advisers have been advising her since last year when the amount of her interaction media and social media changed, and that this unusual interaction with media (VF) is likely to be signal of things to come. People don't just go rogue all of sudden if they've been following advice of Palace advisers. BTW, I've never said they are already engaged and an announcement is soon to follow. I do think those are premature, but I can see where they get that from and certainly I don't see actions that either takes that would make reality completely opposite of their speculations. However, your presumption was completely out of thin air and contrary to the actions we've seen her take. There is an element of common sense here.

 

[wyevale]

I apologise if I wrongly 'lumped' you together with those who think they are already engaged and that an announcement is imminent, [it is hard to keep track] !

 

[ROYAL NORWAY]

1. Do you think press coverage doesn't affect public perception? It's hard to fight a dead woman.

2. I was thinking this is a discussion on the board rather than towards one specific poster. So I responded.

3. Again, most of the benefits seems superficial while the burdens are very real.

What I meant was that the Meghan part of my post was me responding to Iluvbertie, It wasn't me saying there are no burdens to royal fife.

Not being able to leave your home and do anything without the media around, anything you wear in public subject to comment, anything you do (or don't do) subject to comment, not being able to speak in public on certain topics, not being able to get involved in political issues ...there's a hefty price for that HRH title.


LaRae

Yes, there's many burdens, but as I said also many benefits.

Some of the the things I listed up in post 608 + some more.

1. She's going to be married to the grandson of QEII: The head of state of 16 countries, the figurehead of 2 billion people, the most beloved, popular, iconic and most famous person in the world. What does that means? That she will be representing her (great honor).

2. She's going to a member of the most prestigious and famous institution/family in the world (enormous prestige).

3. She's going to be HRH the Duchess of something (enormous prestige).

4. She's going to live a life in luxury in a palace with staffers etc.

5. She will have security guards 24/7.

6. She's going to meet some very interesting people.

7. And she's going to get opportunities that not even A-list actors get.

8. She will also get the opportunity to take on many charities and can therefor make a real difference in people's lives.

9. And as Osipi wrote, she'll get the man she loves.

And I really think she can live with that.

 

[Cocoasneeze]

You and others here are on tippy-toes in daily expectation [fuelled by the VF article] that the couple are already affianced and that an announcement is soon to be made accordingly...

So an engagement ring is her moving onto better things, after she gives up her own career, income etc? I want thinking it was more personal kind of 'better things', which were for her benefit, for her fame.

 

[NoShades]

Meghan & Harry will continue to ignore the nasty rabid "NOISE" emitting from vitriolic vipers everywhere and that's more than enough for me......

 

[Osipi]

Now lets be honest here. None of us, and I mean *none* of us know what classifies as "better things" in Meghan's mind.

For some people "better things" are actually having a car that works. Some people think "better things" are being cancer free. Some people think that no matter how much they have, they can do better. Its all perspective and how one looks at things.

 

[NoShades]

She's bringing attention to the fact that she'll soon be Harry's wife. ? If she were merely or mainly in this to garner attention for herself, then surely she would have been doing a better job of this over the last few months? She has had to give up so much of what has made her successful because of this relationship but one interview/photoshoot is suddenly all the proof some need that she is in this for attention? As far as I'm concerned, she earned this cover and interview. I don't see anything wrong with it at all (save the sensational headline, perhaps).

I have to add that it's quite hilarious that many of her critics spent months complaining about Harry "hiding" and protecting her, insisting that this was proof of her not being able to handle royal life. And now, we're back to calling her an attention seeker? Which one is it?? It can't be both!

I find it strange that people dislike a person despite not knowing them personally or what actions or words were said to warrant the dislike.

As a fan of Suits, Meghan has done an adequate job of playing her role. Through her social media, she comes across as a well rounded individual with many interests in philanthropy and social justice in addition to her more 'frivolous' pursuits like travel and food. All in all, an impressive woman who has made a life for herself.

I think Meghan and Harry are grown people who know what they want out of this relationship and the interview while polarizing has done a job in letting the world know who she is and what next is to come.

As for the three vultures at E! Bromley needs to pick a lane and stay in it because she sings a different tune every time the couple appear. Ken Baker has always disliked Meghan and has been consistent in his negativity and the other one has no clue so should keep quiet.

? Bib: quoted for truth.

 

[royal rob]

I'm bit over it all ready to be honest there has been nasty posts from both sides
I'm not sure why the photo spread and I'm not sure it's going to be a happy ever after. But I hope Harry is happy and has the family he wants. Don't think I will bother with this thread much as it's become pretty nasty

 

[cepe]

This is turning into the saddest thread on the Forum as it appears to be so divisive.

 

[Curryong]

It becomes divisive IMO when some posters (including some who are known not to be great fans of Harry's) come on this thread merely to be negative and disruptive. Plus, Harry's and Meghan's is a new romance and feelings are apparently running high about it.

After Harry and Meghan become engaged, and I'm sure they will, no doubt things will calm down somewhat, IMO. People tend to have strong feelings about Harry, as they did and do about Diana, and sometimes the Diana threads get heated too. However, most of it is just a strong exchange of opinions.

 

[jacqui24]

What I meant was that the Meghan part of my post was me responding to Iluvbertie, It wasn't me saying there are no burdens to royal fife.


Yes, there's many burdens, but as I said also many benefits.

Some of the the things I listed up in post 608 + some more.

1. She's going to be married to the grandson of QEII: The head of state of 16 countries, the figurehead of 2 billion people, the most beloved, popular, iconic and most famous person in the world. What does that means? That she will be representing her (great honor).

2. She's going to a member of the most prestigious and famous institution/family in the world (enormous prestige).

3. She's going to be HRH the Duchess of something (enormous prestige).

4. She's going to live a life in luxury in a palace with staffers etc.

5. She will have security guards 24/7.

6. She's going to meet some very interesting people.

7. And she's going to get opportunities that not even A-list actors get.

8. She will also get the opportunity to take on many charities and can therefor make a real difference in people's lives.

9. And as Osipi wrote, she'll get the man she loves.

And I really think she can live with that.

Again, other than the opportunity for her to work on issues that matters to her and the man she loves, it's superficial stuff that wears out after awhile and won't really bring happiness to life.

No one is saying she can't live it. In fact, I've pointed out that she seems willing to make the sacrifices. However, let's not try to act as if she's not making significant sacrifices for a long list of benefits. Most of those "benefits" don't necessarily lead to a happy life.

 

[AlowVera]

So an engagement ring is her moving onto better things, after she gives up her own career, income etc? I want thinking it was more personal kind of 'better things', which were for her benefit, for her fame.

If MM was really a social climber she could marry athletes, producers, businessmen who have more money and also the freedom to spend that money anyway they see fit and still keep her job. PH can't even take a vacation without people whining about it.

 

[cepe]

If MM was really a social climber she could marry athletes, producers, businessmen who have more money and also the freedom to spend that money anyway they see fit and still keep her job. PH can't even take a vacation without people whining about it.

If she was a social climber then you cant get much higher than grabbing a prince and becoming an HRH

if she was into money THEN she would chase athletes, producers, businessmen who have more money than Harry who is only worth c. £10m. Chickenfeed for wealthy AMericans.

Money and status are 2 very different things. H has more status than you can buy in the US. But his wealth doesn't compare with most US sports people

 

[Ish]

This is turning into the saddest thread on the Forum as it appears to be so divisive.

Cepe - I ageee, but give it time. Either they'll break up and this thread'll fade to obscurity, or they'll marry and most of the people who hate the relationship'll jump on board (if it can happen for Sofia of Sweden, it can happen for Meghan), and we can resume our regularly scheduled bickering about Diana/Charles/Camilla.

It becomes divisive IMO when some posters (including some who are known not to be great fans of Harry's) come on this thread merely to be negative and disruptive. Plus, Harry's and Meghan's is a new romance and feelings are apparently running high about it.

In defence of those posters (although I do 100% agree that some people are here just to be negative and disruptive), there are also some posters here who are huge fans of Meghan/this relationship who are just as inclined to be disruptive, particularly if anything negative is said - not even just in a sense of "someone says something negative about Meghan/Harry/the relationship" sense, but also in a "someone points out that this relationship has very legitimate obstacles to face" sense.

 

[Pranter]

Oh dear. ��

Actually I believe it was the other way round and it was Harry who did the dumping as he eventually grew tired of her hysterics and found her to be so immature. He'd obviously concluded she wasn't equipped to take on the duties that becoming his wife would entail. And wasn't up to the job. There were many reports of frequent rows between them in the press at time and she was often pictured looking miserable with a face on her. But to be fair to her, no one could blame her one bit seeing as Harry still carried a bit of a rep as the playboy about town and he wasn't about to settle down any time soon. This at a time during which her camp & family were busy vigorously shipping for a marriage to occur.

There used to be regular stories/rumours flying about of 'impending announcements' and the like.

Now, there is no doubt in my mind whatsoever that's Harry was genuinely infatuated with Cressida at the start of the relationship and he did go some way in tying to woo her initially. I just think he outgrew her and got fed up of the drama. He is that much of a gentleman though and allowed the narrative to flourish that she walked away when the reality was he spared her blushes.

It was quite a different scenario with Harry & Chelsy they were both adventurous and in love but clearly too young to settle down but he did propose to her at one point. Together they enjoyed raucous fun and there were many episodes of splitting up & making up soon after. They both possessed similar temperaments. I think she finally decided to walk away in the belief that he'd grow up one day then go running back to her as was usually the case with those two. Only he has now grown up and it doesn't appear he will be going back, but who knows?

I strongly believe H&M have met each other at the right time. They are both mature and have experienced life at its fullest. They're also fully equipped and prepared to weather any storm that crosses their path. They were individually on a journey before this point in their lives.

There is something very deep between them, that much is obvious.

I tend to agree about Cressida/Harry...at first I think there was that attraction but they were never really in sync for long term...she was several years young and focused on a career and I always got the impression she was a bit immature/flighty. I never thought she really matched him.

The relationship with Chelsea/Harry was very immature and unstable ...they were both too volatile and too young to deal with each other. That said, I don't think they would fit together 10 plus years forward either.

Meghan/Harry is really the first relationship I've seen develop into something that could really go the distance. They seem well suited and both at the right place in life.

Time will tell.


LaRae

 

[Countessmeout]

If she was a social climber then you cant get much higher than grabbing a prince and becoming an HRH

if she was into money THEN she would chase athletes, producers, businessmen who have more money than Harry who is only worth c. £10m. Chickenfeed for wealthy AMericans.

Money and status are 2 very different things. H has more status than you can buy in the US. But his wealth doesn't compare with most US sports people

Agreed. And even for status there really is only so much to gain.

Honestly if she was just out for wealth and prestige, a wealthy aristocrat, politician or athlete would be better. A non royal duchess with all the parties, money, jewels and lifestyle but without the duties that go along with being a royal and speculation, has far more perks.

If I was out for a title and tiara, Id rather be the future duchess of Northumberland, living in Syon house and Hogwarts, and enjoying immense wealth as a private citizen then marrying a royal. But that's just me.

 

[royal rob]

Oh dear. ��

Actually I believe it was the other way round and it was Harry who did the dumping as he eventually grew tired of her hysterics and found her to be so immature. He'd obviously concluded she wasn't equipped to take on the duties that becoming his wife would entail. And wasn't up to the job. There were many reports of frequent rows between them in the press at time and she was often pictured looking miserable with a face on her. But to be fair to her, no one could blame her one bit seeing as Harry still carried a bit of a rep as the playboy about town and he wasn't about to settle down any time soon. This at a time during which her camp & family were busy vigorously shipping for a marriage to occur.

There used to be regular stories/rumours flying about of 'impending announcements' and the like.

Now, there is no doubt in my mind whatsoever that Harry was genuinely infatuated with Cressida at the start of the relationship and he did go some way in tying to woo her initially. I just think he outgrew her and got fed up of the drama. He is that much of a gentleman though and allowed the narrative to flourish that she had simply walked away when the reality was he spared her blushes.

It was quite a different scenario with Harry & Chelsy they were both adventurous and in love but clearly too young to settle down but he did propose to her at one point. Together they enjoyed raucous fun and there were many episodes of splitting up & making up soon after. They both possessed similar temperaments. I think she finally decided to walk away in the belief that he'd grow up one day then go running back to her as was usually the case with those two. Only he has now grown up and it doesn't appear he will be going back, but who knows?

In between all that were the Funtime girls, one nighters, the temporary flings that are recently crawling out of the woodworks without a hint of shame claiming to have 'meant something' to him. And yet there are no photographic evidence to shed more light on these claims. These women were hidden away out of sight for a reason.

I strongly believe H&M have met each other at the right time. They are both mature and have experienced life at its fullest. They're also fully equipped and prepared to weather any storm that crosses their path. They were individually on a journey before this point in their lives.

There is something very deep going on between them, that much is obvious.

Why bring ex girlfriends into it ? Again no need to rubbish his ex with unproven talk.There is need to do this at all.

 

[jacqui24]

Why bring ex girlfriends into it ? Again no need to rubbish his ex with unproven talk.There is need to do this at all.

To be fair, it started with a poster saying how Harry has all kinds of issues and thinks Meghan is the best he could do because his ex-gf dumped him or something like that. But granted, that's not a conversation that needs to go any further.

 

[cepe]

Agreed. And even for status there really is only so much to gain.

Honestly if she was just out for wealth and prestige, a wealthy aristocrat, politician or athlete would be better. A non royal duchess with all the parties, money, jewels and lifestyle but without the duties that go along with being a royal and speculation, has far more perks.

If I was out for a title and tiara, Id rather be the future duchess of Northumberland, living in Syon house and Hogwarts, and enjoying immense wealth as a private citizen then marrying a royal. But that's just me.

In reality no. When we had floods a couple of yrs ago, the only way the D of Northumberland could do repairs was to sell off treasures. Wealthy in assets; poor in cash. That's the problem with UK aristocratic wealth that many don't understand.

Same with HMQ - lots of assets, not £300m in cash!

 

[jacqui24]

In reality no. When we had floods a couple of yrs ago, the only way the D of Northumberland could do repairs was to sell off treasures. Wealthy in assets; poor in cash. That's the problem with UK aristocratic wealth that many don't understand.

Same with HMQ - lots of assets, not £300m in cash!

This is veering off topic. I don't think she's really looking for status based on two very obvious facts. First, she married a normal guy after a long relationship the first time and then she was involved with another normal guy between that marriage and this relationship. Second, she was caught in a fire question answer months before she met Harry. The interviewer actually asked her Prince William or Prince Harry. That's the one question where her answer gives the feeling like I don't care enough to have an opinion on this. She finally did say Harry because the interviewer was giddy about Harry. It was quite funny actually.