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  #2641  
Old 04-17-2017, 12:31 PM
hel hel is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duke of Marmalade View Post
I heard first of no ring, no bring over 25 years ago, when my husband and I were invited to my husband's friend wedding. I was 'lucky' that I was already the wife back then and not the girlfriend, so we went together anyway, my husband later mentioned that he would have declined the invitation without me (not that I would have forced him to). But already back then I thought this this 'rule' was so outdated - and now, in 2017, even more so. This cannot be serious. But maybe can somebody enlighten me, is this a thing of the English upper class? Because you honestly cannot chose your guests from having a ring or not but from the human being you want to have around you on the day.
What's bizarre to me is that "no ring, no bring" is being described in some papers as "your spouse is your plus 1" which I do not understand. Because where I grew up, the people whose names are on the invitation are the invited guests, and married couples are invited together. Alternatively, a long established couple who are both known to the bridal couple would be invited together and addressed as "Mr. Bob Noname and Miss Anne Whoisshe". In that case, Anne would be an invited guest, not a plus one.

A "plus one" or "and guest" is just that... "mr. bob noname and guest" and is used when you're encouraging your single guests to bring someone whom you may not know. It's done for the comfort of the guest or when you don't know if the person is dating someone at the moment.

But the idea that you would know who someone was involved with and then put "and guest" is very rude; suggesting that the other half of a married couple is a "plus one" as bad as asking for money on the invitation. SMH

Victoria Arbiter, in an interview I saw recently, said that the concept of "plus one" isn't really all that in vogue in Britain.. is that actually the case? Is it possible that its just a concept that the press is explaining badly because it's not a thing over there?
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  #2642  
Old 04-17-2017, 12:35 PM
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Now that's it's confirmed Harry is going to Pippa's wedding, it makes sense (to me) that Meghan will also go, providing she is not filming Suits.
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  #2643  
Old 04-17-2017, 12:51 PM
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I don't think "plus ones" are all that common in high society UK, unless the couple has been dating a long time, or the bride/groom are friends with both parties. Look at Pippa, when she dated Nico for 3 years, during those 3 years she attended several weddings, to the point that the media mocked her constant attendance, yet Nico was only brought as a "plus one" to two of those weddings. Same with Alex Loudon, his attendance with her was the exception not the rule. If Pippa has strict guidelines for plus ones at her wedding, it looks like she will just be following the same protocol that she followed as a guest in the past.
  #2644  
Old 04-17-2017, 12:56 PM
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Originally Posted by hel View Post
What's bizarre to me is that "no ring, no bring" is being described in some papers as "your spouse is your plus 1" which I do not understand. Because where I grew up, the people whose names are on the invitation are the invited guests, and married couples are invited together. Alternatively, a long established couple who are both known to the bridal couple would be invited together and addressed as "Mr. Bob Noname and Miss Anne Whoisshe". In that case, Anne would be an invited guest, not a plus one.

A "plus one" or "and guest" is just that... "mr. bob noname and guest" and is used when you're encouraging your single guests to bring someone whom you may not know. It's done for the comfort of the guest or when you don't know if the person is dating someone at the moment.

But the idea that you would know who someone was involved with and then put "and guest" is very rude; suggesting that the other half of a married couple is a "plus one" as bad as asking for money on the invitation. SMH
When a married couple is invited to a wedding, it is stated Mr. and Mrs. Smith. When an engaged couple is invited the invitation reads Mr. John Smith and Miss Sarah Jones. That also means that if Sarah can't attend, John does not have the liberty to bring any only drinking buddy instead. The plus one is used when you actually don't know the invited person's situation. I was told by a cheeky nephew that the plus one was started as many couples just live together anymore and changed partners as one does their socks. The plus one was originated so the invited wouldn't be embarrassed. This is really only important with a proper "sit down and served reception", with place cards and sitting arrangement for all tables. If a buffet, the extra one or 10 really makes no difference as much more food must be prepared for the event.
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  #2645  
Old 04-17-2017, 01:35 PM
hel hel is online now
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Originally Posted by Winnie View Post
When a married couple is invited to a wedding, it is stated Mr. and Mrs. Smith. When an engaged couple is invited the invitation reads Mr. John Smith and Miss Sarah Jones. That also means that if Sarah can't attend, John does not have the liberty to bring any only drinking buddy instead. The plus one is used when you actually don't know the invited person's situation. I was told by a cheeky nephew that the plus one was started as many couples just live together anymore and changed partners as one does their socks. The plus one was originated so the invited wouldn't be embarrassed. This is really only important with a proper "sit down and served reception", with place cards and sitting arrangement for all tables. If a buffet, the extra one or 10 really makes no difference as much more food must be prepared for the event.
Well, it looks like you, me, and Emily and Peggy Post are all on the same page. It's too bad that the british press corps seem to be a bit confused.
  #2646  
Old 04-17-2017, 01:48 PM
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To be honest, whether or not Meghan attends Pippa's wedding on Harry's arm doesn't matter one bit. If, and its a big if, Meghan has requested time away during this period, it may point to her being in the UK but then again, there's a bazillion other possibilities for requesting a breather. I seriously doubt that Pippa's going to be reaching for the smelling salts or feel her day will be ruined unless Harry has someone on his arm for her day.

A couple attending a wedding is just that. A couple. Two people there to celebrate and witness a marriage of two people. Its not an indication of Harry being next to marry nor is there any meaning should Harry go solo. People very easily can put two and two together and come up with ABC.
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  #2647  
Old 04-17-2017, 02:30 PM
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Time to get back on topic - let's not fill this thread with talk about Harry and his current girlfriend. Thanks.
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  #2648  
Old 04-17-2017, 03:48 PM
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I wonder if Pippa will have any adult attendants, or stick to children?

I've read no references to any other members of the wedding party except for George, Charlotte, and Spencer Matthews.
  #2649  
Old 04-17-2017, 03:58 PM
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I'm waiting to see if Kate will be part of the wedding party.


LaRae
  #2650  
Old 04-17-2017, 04:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pranter View Post
I'm waiting to see if Kate will be part of the wedding party.


LaRae
I think there is a strong possibility that she might be. Even if the communiquè didn't say so.

I also think that, at this point, Meghan Markle will be there.
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  #2651  
Old 04-17-2017, 04:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pranter View Post
I'm waiting to see if Kate will be part of the wedding party.


LaRae

I don't think that would be appropriate given Kate's current rank.
  #2652  
Old 04-17-2017, 04:16 PM
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When it comes to family weddings, I seriously doubt that public rank and file and titles mean very much. First and foremost at this wedding, Kate will be Pippa's sister. In this case I think sister trumps all.
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  #2653  
Old 04-17-2017, 04:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Marty91charmed View Post
I think there is a strong possibility that she might be. Even if the communiquè didn't say so.

I also think that, at this point, Meghan Markle will be there.

I hope Kate is a matron of honor. They are very close as sisters and I don't think they would let anything like 'status' interfere with her being in the wedding. The thing that would make sense that she wouldn't be in the party is because of George & Charlotte being in the party and she would be needed to help sort them out.

I said all along Harry was going to be invited. Now..I am still not sure he will bring Meghan...actually I will be kinda surprised if he does simply due to it being a smaller venue.

Hmmm maybe he'll bring her to the reception.....


LaRae
  #2654  
Old 04-17-2017, 04:59 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Osipi View Post
When it comes to family weddings, I seriously doubt that public rank and file and titles mean very much. First and foremost at this wedding, Kate will be Pippa's sister. In this case I think sister trumps all.


Princess Margaret was a bridesmaid to Elizabeth but Elizabeth then Queen was not a bridesmaid for her sister. Kate is still the future Queen. She isn't going to be standing next to her sister like the Best Man would. That's Mike's job. Kate would be stuck holding the flowers and carrying the train if there is one.

Since we know George and Charlotte are in the wedding, maybe Kate just wanted to be at the top of the aisle, in case the kids need some prodding to move up the aisle.
  #2655  
Old 04-17-2017, 05:22 PM
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I think the big difference here is that Margaret's wedding was a very publicized national event as she was the sister of the Queen. All stops pulled out, order of precedence in force and rank and file and titles mattered.

The public is not "invited" to Pippa's wedding. Pippa is a private citizen and this is a family wedding albeit a family wedding with public interest. Once they're all in that church and the doors are closed, the public is out in the cold and they are family and friends there to witness Pippa and James start their life together. I don't see rank, file and titles having any chutzpah for the ceremony. If Pippa wants her sister as her Matron of Honor, I don't see anything preventing Kate from obliging her.
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  #2656  
Old 04-17-2017, 08:41 PM
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The format of the day appears to be

1.morning wedding (11:00 has been mentioned)
2.reception in marquee at the Middletons
3.evening party

I think if Meghan is invited, it will be to the party.
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  #2657  
Old 04-17-2017, 09:04 PM
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We probably won't see pictures from the reception or the evening party. Unless there is car drive by shot. We aren't going to know if someone went to the reception or party if they aren't pictured going or leaving the church.
  #2658  
Old 04-17-2017, 09:05 PM
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Meghan Markle Will Attend Pippa Middleton's Wedding

If these overly intrusive and gossipy media stories are to be believed, many of you have hit the nail on the head. Supposedly Harry will be bringing Meghan to the after-reception, not the wedding ceremony. It makes sense to me. I really don't see what all the fuss is about in the media to begin with, aside from them trying to sell their publications.

Likely Pippa is not that overly concerned about the girlfriends of close family members attending either her wedding or the after-ceremony. She's probably more concerned about other logistics and details. There's a lot involved in putting a wedding together. The intense media interest is purely because Pippa is Duchess Kate's sister and because Harry has a new American girlfriend (and there's also some flak in the media about other relatives' girlfriends). Oy vey!

It's Pippa's wedding and her family will ensure that it's special and about her. No one either during the ceremony or at the reception are going to be ogling other invited guests' girlfriends to extent of overshadowing or ignoring the bride! I can't say the same for the media, of course. But hopefully, paps will not get intrusive pictures of Harry and his girlfriend to broadcast all over the media after the fact.
  #2659  
Old 04-17-2017, 09:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cepe View Post
The format of the day appears to be

1.morning wedding (11:00 has been mentioned)
2.reception in marquee at the Middletons
3.evening party

I think if Meghan is invited, it will be to the party.
What's the point of going if you're just going to the reception or party? I would think if Meghan is invited and she can make it, she's going to the wedding and reception and party.
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  #2660  
Old 04-17-2017, 09:20 PM
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Very simple reasoning here. The church only holds so many people. The marquee at the Middletons will probably hold a lot more people hence Meghan attending the reception and not the ceremony. I've seen this done quite a few times both ways. Invited to the ceremony but not the reception as its a smaller venue or there is a ban on children and not invited to the church but to the reception to celebrate.

It makes a lot of sense to me actually. Meghan isn't close to Pippa and those are the people she wants at the actual ceremony.
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