Marriage Customs of the Ruling Family

[lady blue]

it is not a law, it is like Imanmajed said only a tradition.
and Shiekh Zayed was married to a non shiekha and alot of his sons are married to non shiekhas.

 

[USGirl]

Lady blue - are you sure? The tradition would be marriage to a cousin. I'm aware many Shiekhs' are married to non-Shiekha's. Thanks for your answer but it doesn't answer the question.

 

[NGalitzine]

^^^^^
So, are you suggesting that Sheikh Zayed and a lot of his sons have broken UAE laws by marrying non-Sheikhas?

 

[USGirl]

Apparently, it's easier to argue rather than have discussions. Here's the history..I've read that Shiekh Zayed wrote a law into place requiring Shiekhs' to marry Shiekhas'. The basis of the law was bec he noticed a lot of Shiekh's were marrying non-Shiekha and it was unfair since a Shiekha can only marry a Shiekh. When this took place...I believe the 70's rather he was just a Ruler or then Ruler & President.

Now, can we "discuss" not "argue"? Geesh...it's easier for some of you to be right rather than talk. It is a blog...or am I wrong about that?
.

 

[Warren]

...I've read that Shiekh Zayed wrote a law into place requiring Shiekhs' to marry Shiekhas'

Perhaps your source was incorrect, perhaps you misinterpreted what was stated, perhaps it's a faulty recollection of what you read.
Otherwise, can you provide a source?

Before this get's too out of hand (only one offensive message deleted so far), let's summarise...

dazzling (UAE) - tradition
Imanmajed (UAE) - tradition
lady blue (Bahrain) - tradition

USGirl (USA) - law

>. I'll leave it up to members to draw their own conclusions.

It is a blog...or am I wrong about that? .

TRF is not a blog; strictly speaking it is a forum or discussion board.
.

 

[jikodi]

I do not really know on what's your point .... If HH Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid al Maktoum has also married non-emirati women, I am convinced that he sees no problem in that his sons do so. The UAE society is deeply rooted in their traditions and I like that. But still, has changed in the last 40 years a lot and it will change much more with the younger generation of leaders. The Emirates is not a traditional dynasty nor a kingdom. As long as the leader the benefit of the people in their country at heart, so long as the old traditions will continue.I'm sure any decent girl is welcomed into the family of al Maktoum as the wife of Crown Prince Hamdan or one of the other sons. But the question is rather, which girl from outside the Arab world is willing to engage with the traditions of the UAE and to respect them? Every marriage in higher circles also means to be willing to let a big piece of the usual life behind and to the personal freedom behind the interests of a state.

My point is, is it practical considering the political turbulance in the Arab world, P Haya's marriage to Sheikh Mohammed and the reaction to it for any of Sheikh Mo's sons to marry a non-Emirati, non-Arab or non-Muslim and it was known to the public. I also wonder if this applies in the Maktoum family officially or unofficially:

Like in Kuwait do you know that if the mother is non Kuwaity or the wife is non Kuwaity they can never Rule Kuwait even if it was their turn

I hope Sheikh mo's sons marry women who will be seen and photographed in public.

 

[Isotta]

For what it's worth, I never heard of Shaikh Zayed requiring Sheiks to marry only Shaikhas. He did encourage (not require only encouraged) Emiratis to marry Emiratis; and it is difficult to acquire Emirati citizenship to this day. I do believe that Zayed wanted to champion the continuation of Emirates' customs and tradition in the modern world he helped create. Correct me if I am wrong here (but my spell check has also corrected things to the point where I am not certain of which is right, so please don't bother with that).

 

[Imanmajed]

Lady blue - are you sure? The tradition would be marriage to a cousin. I'm aware many Shiekhs' are married to non-Shiekha's. Thanks for your answer but it doesn't answer the question.

Then I have a question for you: What is your question exactly?
Did you want to ask anything or make a statement?
Why you can`t understand that for your question (?) or assertion (?) is no law that force a Sheikh in a prescribed marriage?

 

[Imanmajed]

Apparently, it's easier to argue rather than have discussions. Here's the history..I've read that Shiekh Zayed wrote a law into place requiring Shiekhs' to marry Shiekhas'. The basis of the law was bec he noticed a lot of Shiekh's were marrying non-Shiekha and it was unfair since a Shiekha can only marry a Shiekh. When this took place...I believe the 70's rather he was just a Ruler or then Ruler & President.

Now, can we "discuss" not "argue"? Geesh...it's easier for some of you to be right rather than talk. It is a blog...or am I wrong about that?
.

If you set up a claim, we deny the obvious, then where will come a discussion? A Sheikha can also marry a person who is not a Sheikh. The question is whether the Sheikha would want to marry a non Sheikh?
There have been recommendations to marry a Sheikha in modern times. Since there is a difference of a law. For a long time were ALL Emirati women to marry only a Emirati man. Today, women from the UAE getting married men from other GCC states. Starting this year their children will have the opportunity to be then Emirati nationals. Previously this was only possible if the father was an Emirati.

 

[USGirl]

For what it's worth, I never heard of Shaikh Zayed requiring Sheiks to marry only Shaikhas. He did encourage (not require only encouraged) Emiratis to marry Emiratis; and it is difficult to acquire Emirati citizenship to this day. I do believe that Zayed wanted to champion the continuation of Emirates' customs and tradition in the modern world he helped create. Correct me if I am wrong here (but my spell check has also corrected things to the point where I am not certain of which is right, so please don't bother with that).

Isotta - I believe it's a Shiekha not all Shiekha. Still can't find this document. Don't know if it's in his autobiography, however, it's clearly his earlier work. He did rule several years prior to becoming President. Unfortunately, this question is taking an "inappropriate turn" so I'm going to leave it. When I find it, I'll be sure to post.

By the way, only a childish person will worry about your spelling...I understood every word. Thanks.

 

[Imanmajed]

My point is, is it practical considering the political turbulance in the Arab world, P Haya's marriage to Sheikh Mohammed and the reaction to it for any of Sheikh Mo's sons to marry a non-Emirati, non-Arab or non-Muslim and it was known to the public. I also wonder if this applies in the Maktoum family officially or unofficially:

I hope Sheikh mo's sons marry women who will be seen and photographed in public.

Sheikh Mo officially married twice. He also has other marriages that have been unofficially closed. I am aware that it is difficult for foreigners to understand our culture.

Your last point: Time will be changed! You can change the look of a city in 10 years, completely, but to change the traditions of a country, we need 100 years and more. Sometimes traditions such as these remain as they are - even if you can not understand why.

 

[Imanmajed]

For what it's worth, I never heard of Shaikh Zayed requiring Sheiks to marry only Shaikhas. He did encourage (not require only encouraged) Emiratis to marry Emiratis; and it is difficult to acquire Emirati citizenship to this day. I do believe that Zayed wanted to champion the continuation of Emirates' customs and tradition in the modern world he helped create. Correct me if I am wrong here (but my spell check has also corrected things to the point where I am not certain of which is right, so please don't bother with that).

absolutely right. He did encourage (not forced) to marry Emiratis other Emiratis; The TRADITIONS he saw as important for the future at the United Arab Emirates. Because in his words: who has no past (who can forget his roots) has no future.

 

[jikodi]

Iman, as an Emirati, do you think your fellow Dubaians/Emiratis would accept if CP Hamdan or either of Sh Mo's sons married a foreign royal, a non-Muslim, a non-Arab or a non-Emirati as his official wife? How would you rate each on a scale of 1 to 10 for adverse reaction (10 being totally unacceptable and 1 being totally acceptable)? Example: a foreign royal (your score)

 

[Imanmajed]

Iman, as an Emirati, do you think your fellow Dubaians/Emiratis would accept if CP Hamdan or either of Sh Mo's sons married a foreign royal, a non-Muslim, a non-Arab or a non-Emirati as his official wife? How would you rate each on a scale of 1 to 10 for adverse reaction (10 being totally unacceptable and 1 being totally acceptable)? Example: a foreign royal (your score)

I`m one Emirati only, I´m not a complete society with a uniform opinion. Therefore I can only answer the question on my person out.

official wife for CP HH Sheikh Hamdan
a foreign arab royal (1)
a foreign royal (4)
a non-Muslim (10)
a non Arab (7)
a non Emirati (4)

official wife for other unmarried sons of HH Sheikh Mo
a foreign arab royal (1)
a foreign royal (2)
a non-Muslim (10)
a non Arab (4)
a non Emirati (2)

For inofficial wifes all point the same - (1) for all unmarried Sheikhs, because marriage of an inofficial wife is their private affair only. There will always be those who are concerned and others who find it ok.

 

[LV_GiRL]

i am sure 100% that everyone will be surprised with CP Hamdan's choice of wife. He's what you can call it a "modern prince," therefore i can see traditions being broken and a lot of people going... "WOW"!

 

[jikodi]

Thanks Iman! Would it really be that bad if hamdan or his brothers married a non-Muslim? Why is this the case? What about a non-Muslim foreign royal (Christian or Jewish)?

Any other Emiratis want to add their input?

 

[dazzling]

i am sure 100% that everyone will be surprised with CP Hamdan's choice of wife. He's what you can call it a "modern prince," therefore i can see traditions being broken and a lot of people going... "WOW"!

Being modern doesn't mean he has to break from tradition.
Hamdan seems like a very traditional person, he is very into tradition and tradition habits, sports etc. Hamdan does not seem like a person who will marry a non-emarati as a first wife and if he marries a an Emarati commoner that will be fine as many Sheikh's do.

 

[dazzling]

A lot of Sheikha's on their wedding day do wear tiaras which are later kept and handed do their children on their wedding day or converted into a necklace.

 

[LV_GiRL]

Being modern doesn't mean he has to break from tradition.
Hamdan seems like a very traditional person, he is very into tradition and tradition habits, sports etc. Hamdan does not seem like a person who will marry a non-emarati as a first wife and if he marries a an Emarati commoner that will be fine as many Sheikh's do.

Thanks for your opinion Dazzling. i still think that Hamdan will surprise everyone out with his choice of future wife.

 

[Imanmajed]

Thanks Iman! Would it really be that bad if hamdan or his brothers married a non-Muslim? Why is this the case? What about a non-Muslim foreign royal (Christian or Jewish)?

It is not really bad. But we love our traditions. It is acceptable in the eyes of many Emiratis when he marries a Muslim. But I think that an official marriage with a non-muslim would be difficult for the wife. Sometimes the sheikh more than one wife. Do you believe that a Christian woman would accept that? If the couple has children, then these Muslims and would grow in that faith. Can a Christian or Jewish woman do this?

We have a saying in Arabic: The stranger is blind, although he can see. This explains that for a non-emiraty it would be very difficult to come to terms with our traditions unconditionally. And just this absolute respect and acceptance of our traditions for the future wife of a CP is very important if she want to exist in our society.

 

[Imanmajed]

Being modern doesn't mean he has to break from tradition.
Hamdan seems like a very traditional person, he is very into tradition and tradition habits, sports etc. Hamdan does not seem like a person who will marry a non-emarati as a first wife and if he marries a an Emarati commoner that will be fine as many Sheikh's do.

That is absolutely correct. I think his first official wife will be a UAE national or at least an Arab Mulim. That will be good for the future of our country. Should he marry more women unofficially, it does not matter where those come from or what religion they have. This is his personal private matter only.

 

[Kalila18]

That is absolutely correct. I think his first official wife will be a UAE national or at least an Arab Mulim. That will be good for the future of our country. Should he marry more women unofficially, it does not matter where those come from or what religion they have. This is his personal private matter only.

Personally I think it would be the best for the good of the UAE too. Sometimes it's just hard for outsiders to fully incorporate themselves. Not saying that it is impossible, it would just be very hard.

 

[ZuluPrincess]

It is not really bad. But we love our traditions. It is acceptable in the eyes of many Emiratis when he marries a Muslim. But I think that an official marriage with a non-muslim would be difficult for the wife. Sometimes the sheikh more than one wife. Do you believe that a Christian woman would accept that? If the couple has children, then these Muslims and would grow in that faith. Can a Christian or Jewish woman do this?

We have a saying in Arabic: The stranger is blind, although he can see. This explains that for a non-emiraty it would be very difficult to come to terms with our traditions unconditionally. And just this absolute respect and acceptance of our traditions for the future wife of a CP is very important if she want to exist in our society.

That is absolutely correct. I think his first official wife will be a UAE national or at least an Arab Mulim. That will be good for the future of our country. Should he marry more women unofficially, it does not matter where those come from or what religion they have. This is his personal private matter only.

Greetings Iman,

What is your take on a marriage between HH Sheikh Hamdan and a Zulu Princess (Christian, of course)? Obviously the bride would have to adjust, but would the population tolerate it?

 

[CalifornianLady]

"Unofficial" wives

It is true that it can be very difficult for outsiders to understand Emirati or other Arab countries' customs. For example, would someone give me a definition of an "unofficial" wife? What rights does she have? Can she initiate a divorce? Can she own her own property? Does she have rights to inherit a portion of her husband's estate when he dies? What rights to support does she have if her husband divorces her? Does she have a right to keep her children with her? Do they have rights of inheritance? In what way do the "unofficial" wives rights, duties and responsibilities differ from those of the "official" wives? This is definitely an area where there is likely to be a great deal of misunderstanding on the part of non-Muslims and/or non-Arabs.

 

[Akilah]

An official wife of a sheikh or Arab prince would be a Muslim. An unofficial wife may have the option to convert or not to convert, if she is not already a Muslim. If she is aboard, it may not be an issue, but if she is living within the respective country, she will have to convert and the children will be raised as Muslims within the country.

The likelihood of an official wife being a non-Muslim is not plausible. A Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, or Catholic would have to convert and learn the tradition and social/cultural norms to exist within the social constructs of a Muslim society. It would be very challenging for a non-Muslim to adjust, especially if they are use to (acclimated to) Western norms.

It is true that it can be very difficult for outsiders to understand Emirati or other Arab countries' customs. For example, would someone give me a definition of an "unofficial" wife? What rights does she have? Can she initiate a divorce? Can she own her own property? Does she have rights to inherit a portion of her husband's estate when he dies? What rights to support does she have if her husband divorces her? Does she have a right to keep her children with her? Do they have rights of inheritance? In what way do the "unofficial" wives rights, duties and responsibilities differ from those of the "official" wives? This is definitely an area where there is likely to be a great deal of misunderstanding on the part of non-Muslims and/or non-Arabs.

To answer your questions:

An unofficial wife would not have any official/public role other than "private wife." In the event of a divorce, the wife may be given a settlement or she might not. If it is an amicable split, she may get a nice settlement. As for children, it depends on the sheikh or prince (look at the Sultan of Brunei, his children with the second wife, whom he divorced, they live in London primarily with their mother). If the sheikh/prince wants his children to remain with him in his country, the woman probable would not get primary custody of the children. She would have to come visit or she not have access to her children at all.

In the event that sheikh/prince dies and there are official wives, they would be provide for first and their offspring, unless, the sheikh/prince has made provisions before his death, you might be out of luck.

 

[NGalitzine]

What is the difference between an "unofficial wife" and a mistress or concubine? I assume that these unofficial wives are in addition to the 4 wives a Muslim man can have at the same time. Do official wives 1-4 have equal status or is it better to be wife #1 than wife #4?

 

[Akilah]

What is the difference between an "unofficial wife" and a mistress or concubine? I assume that these unofficial wives are in addition to the 4 wives a Muslim man can have at the same time. Do official wives 1-4 have equal status or is it better to be wife #1 than wife #4?

An unofficial wife is is a women whom a sheikh or prince has married but he has not announced the union. It would be the same as getting married but not announcing in a newspaper or sending formal announcements associates/friends/co-workers.

No, unofficial wives are included in the 4 wives that a Muslim man is allowed to have according to the Quran. All wives are to be treated equally. However, that is not allows the case. For example, Sheikh Mohammad of the UAE has acknowledged Shiekha Hind and Princess Haya, but he has not acknowledged the union he had with Maitha and Christina's mother.

 

[LV_GiRL]

I respect the UAE traditions and culture. However, i believe that it is inevitable for the whole world to go through changes and modernization and UAE not be affected by it. Wether the UAE people like it or not change will come. I have emirate friends and i was actually speaking to one of my friends and she said that emirate people are actually changing their views on having multiple wives. Especially with this economy, everyone i mean literally the whole world has been affected by it and we all know that the bigger your family is the more $ you spend. I believe that things are changing even if its slowly but things are changing in the UAE society. It's IMPOSSIBLE to stay the same with all respect to my emirate brothers and sisters.

 

[Imanmajed]

I respect the UAE traditions and culture. However, i believe that it is inevitable for the whole world to go through changes and modernization and UAE not be affected by it. Wether the UAE people like it or not change will come. I have emirate friends and i was actually speaking to one of my friends and she said that emirate people are actually changing their views on having multiple wives. Especially with this economy, everyone i mean literally the whole world has been affected by it and we all know that the bigger your family is the more $ you spend. I believe that things are changing even if its slowly but things are changing in the UAE society. It's IMPOSSIBLE to stay the same with all respect to my emirate brothers and sisters.

Thank you for your openness my european sister. Of course, our society is changing steadily in the UAE as well as all forms of society constantly changing in the world. Society is not static. Many Sheikhs have more than one wife at the same time. But the normal local in more than 80% of cases have only one wife. There is nothing so that all Emirati men have two, three or four wives. The possibility of several women comes from the Quran. But there is this from the religion of clear rules, under which circumstances this is possible. One of them is that they all women in the same way has to supply. This means you must have, of course, a good financial status. It therefore does not change the tradition - you have the opportunity to marry several women continue- but only the financial situation of individuals prevented such multible marriage.

 

[Isotta]

My husband once observed, "In the West we are polygamous, too, only we have one spouse at a time, get rid of them and take another. So we practice serial polygamy."