Royalty & How They Feel About Their Roles

[Rebafan81]

Crown Prince/Princess feelings about their role

I am reading a new non-fiction book about an European Princess who doesn't want to take over the "family" business, she just wants to be a regular person. She thinks ribbon cutting and state dinners are very boring and it got me thinking, how do most of the Crown Prince/Princess feel about one day taking on the job? I know Prince William has always said he just wants to be a regular person, what about the rest of them?
CP Haakon??
CP Felipe??
CP Victoria ??
CP Fred??
Have any of them ever expressed a desire to be "non-royal" and have a regular job??? Thanks, this is my first thread, hope this is a good one.

 

[Henri M.]

Prince Friso of the Netherlands

The only royal I know, openly disliking the idea of once being a King, is Prince Friso of the Netherlands, until 2003 the future 'reserve-King'. He is extremely gifted (graduated cum laude in aerodynamica and in economics and a post-graduate MBA) but lacks all what is need to get in touch with 'the public'.

He is the only guy who openly showed his dislike of the idea of being King. In the autobiographical book 'Alexander' by Renate Rubinstein (written with and about the Prince of Orange) a fight is described between the brothers is which Prince Friso yelled 'hit him, but don't kill him! Otherwise I have to be King!'


It is unlikely that any Heir would express openly dislike to his/her destiny because this would stir up a gigantic debate.

 

[princess leonor]

He is the only guy who openly showed his dislike of the idea of being King. In the autobiographical book 'Alexander' by Renate Rubinstein (written with and about the Prince of Orange) she described a fight between the brothers is which Prince Friso yelled 'hit him, but don't kill him! Otherwise I have to be King!'

Seriously??? Oh my God I cannot believe he would say that. Don't kill him or I'll have to be king He didn't have to though, he could just say he didn't want to, and then Constantin would become king right? Do you happen to know how old they were when they had this fight??

 

[Henri M.]

I think Prince Friso was 16 or 17 when he said that. It was in the book 'Alexander', a biographical book on the occasion of the Prince of Orange's 18th birthday. See picture (scanned and photobucketed from an old Beatrix Regina).

Until the birth of his niece Princess Catharina Amalia, Prince Friso was nr 2 in the line of succession.

 

[Lena]

He is the only guy who openly showed his dislike of the idea of being King. In the autobiographical book 'Alexander' by Renate Rubinstein (written with and about the Prince of Orange) a fight is described between the brothers is which Prince Friso yelled 'hit him, but don't kill him! Otherwise I have to be King!'

Sounds very much like something one would expect coming from them. Friso might not connect to the ppl well, but at least the brothers seem to have a great relationship.

I would say the roundabout way all mentioned crown princes (not sure about Felipe, haven´t read many iviews with him) have stated, that they wished to be an ordinary citizen at some points of their lives and for example crown princess Victoria has sometimes stated, that drawings of children, she is getting help her to get over days (in the "job") that aren´t as great as others.
But I guess none of them would ever state, that their tasks are generally boring and meaningless. And many of them seem, as if they got addicted to "mass attention"

I think Crown Prince Naruhito stated this or last year, that he would love to do a "real" job instead of cutting ribbons. Could have been out of context or made up by the press though. Maybe regular watchers of the japanese imperial house know more (?)

 

[auntie]

Sorry for not empathizing, but if Victoria or any other CPrince has problems, so just step down and let the next one (or in Holland the 3rd one ) take over! Talk about being complicated!!!

 

[Madame Royale]

Its truly not as easy as that, auntie.

And if the second isn't willing? and the third, and the fourth and so on? And that's just pointing out the most obvious possibility.

The point of hereditary monarchy, again is?

I think its perfectly normal and understandable for any persons in a position which leads into something greater than themselves, to be confronted with moments (and periods) of 'why me' and 'what if I can't'. Self doubt plagues us all at one time or another, so why should royals be the exception?

Its well known that Crown Prince Frederik went through a period by which he was often depressed at the prospect of oneday assuming the responsibilties of being King. A future he did not choose but one he is bound to by birth, by obligation and by historical significance. Something so great would rest a heavy burden on anyone shoulders and the fact that it is they, who have been "chosen" by accident of birth would definitly mean to them something we could not understand. To suggest the possibility of relinquishing the duty is as easy as passing it on, is I think, rather naïve in judgement (no offence intended )

Frederik has since accepted his future (from what we can see), is happily married, has a beautiful son and can rest easy in knowing he shall have the full support of family, friends and his subjects.

 

[auntie]

One thing I can say, Fred or most of the Crown Princes are not above average intelligence or scholastic acheivments (to put it mildly), The Royal families of Europe with the exception of UK and maybe Holland have no great fortune of what to speak of, without being born into this family Freddy darling would not be able to live the lifestyle he has currently! So they should definitly appreciate the "accident" of birth!

 

[Madame Royale]

One thing I can say, Fred or most of the Crown Princes are not above average intelligence or scholastic acheivments (to put it mildly), The Royal families of Europe with the exception of UK and maybe Holland have no great fortune of what to speak of, without being born into this family Freddy darling would not be able to live the lifestyle he has currently! So they should definitly appreciate the "accident" of birth!

But even Queen Elizabeth was not born to be monarch, so even she would have lived a life (had Edward not abdicated) much the same as her Kent and Gloucester cousins and her children would have held some sort of mainstreem employment. The Queen is not Queen by way of birth, but by way of Abdication which is again, a different circumstance and one which must not be forgotten.

Academically, the Danish Royal Family aren't to bad. I advise you read up on their education.

Crown Prince Frederik studied Science of Government at Harvard from 1992 - 93 and then went on to graduate in 1995 with his Master Political Science. All the while he was fulfilling his military interests and various other UN and political obligations in the US and France. He may not be the most academic royal but he does quite ok I think.

I'm sure they do appreciate their positions and the magnitude of what they are apart of.

 

[IloveCP]

Its truly not as easy as that, auntie.

And if the second isn't willing? and the third, and the fourth and so on? And that's just pointing out the most obvious possibility.

The point of hereditary monarchy, again is?

I think its perfectly normal and understandable for any persons in a position which leads into something greater than themselves, to be confronted with moments (and periods) of 'why me' and 'what if I can't'. Self doubt plagues us all at one time or another, so why should royals be the exception?

Its well known that Crown Prince Frederik went through a period by which he was often depressed at the prospect of oneday assuming the responsibilties of being King. A future he did not choose but one he is bound to by birth, by obligation and by historical significance. Something so great would rest a heavy burden on anyone shoulders and the fact that it is they, who have been "chosen" by accident of birth would definitly mean to them something we could not understand. To suggest the possibility of relinquishing the duty is as easy as passing it on, is I think, rather naïve in judgement (no offence intended )

Frederik has since accepted his future (from what we can see), is happily married, has a beautiful son and can rest easy in knowing he shall have the full support of family, friends and his subjects.

He was really deppressed?If he was than how sad.

 

[AristoCat]

The Sense of Self Imposed Martyrdom Of Royalty

All the time, the royals treat becoming King/Queen like it's some massive martyrdom.

I don't know why royals are so miserable about being royalty. Unlike their ancestors they don't have to make decisions that will affect millions of lives, they don't have to accurately conduct war, they don't have to plot strategies to increase trade, and they don't have to even marry other royals or aristocrats. I don't know why they think their lifestyles are so controlled, as opposed to how their ancestors lived.

It's not like they have to stay on palace grounds only and that they are restricted from meeting other people their age, aside from say, ladies in waiting. They go to school with their peers, they go to work, they get to jet set, they see more of the world than most will in a lifetime, and they have no real responsibilities other than to throw a well put together banquet and look decent. They don't have to even be moral. They screech about how 'their lives are not their own,' while at the same time, running the lives of their staff/courtiers.

At what point do they let themselves be happy and truly enjoy the life they have?

 

[Diarist]

I can remember reading a newspaper article a few years ago [written by a republican, and, from memory, in either The Guardian or The Observer] who took the view that the syndrome you have described above was no more than a 'clever' plot in order to divert people away from considering what a wonderfully privileged life members of the BRF have. In other words, if you are thinking 'poor old Queen with all those duties', you are carefully being steered away from thinking about the enormous mind-boggling wealth etc.

IIRC, Prince Charles particularly was singled out for criticism: the phrase from the article I remember went somewhere along the lines of: ''with all those millons from the Duchy of Cornwall, with a beautiful country house and all those Polo ponies, an Aston Martin and dozens of staff to take care of your every need, what is the only response you can make to having such good fortune? Answer: to pull a long face and look as miserable as possible, so that the peasants (sic) don't notice that whilst they are slaving, you are living a life of the utmost comfort' etc etc. You get the picture.

As for whether a Royal Life is onerous, I suspect it is in one way, but not in others. And you only have to look at how some people fight to marry into the BRF to see that it cannot be so bad.

True, you are often on display and have to carry out royal duties, but this has to be balanced against the advantages. When I was younger, I was always told that the whole point of the Royal Family's advantages was to equip them to 'cope' with their life of public service so that they had as straightforward a time as possible: thus they had the financial means to patronise the couture houses, so that they did not expend too much enegery traipsing from shop to shop and that they had the money to purchase exclusive clothes, so that there was no danger of turning up at an event only to find 3 other people in the same dress [which often happens with Designer Clothed ladies at Royal Ascot!!]. You live in well-guarded palaces and castles, so that you are safe and well-protected. You have a Civil List or equivalent allowance so that you do not have to go to work etc etc. and therefore have time to perform your royal duties. Private Secretaries take care of all the admin. so that you have no worries on that score. Staff keep your home clean and tidy so that you don't have to rush about with the vacuum cleaner etc etc. People do your shopping and your cooking, so you don't have to worry on that score. A Chauffeur drives you everywhere so that you do not have to worry about your route etc etc. You get the picture.

A few years ago, Prince Charles, in one of his introspective moods, complained that 'his life was mapped out for him every day of the year for ever' and that no one ever had any idea of what this was like. He was then immediately 'shot down' by a somewhat robust social commentator, who said that that was exactly the same as most other people, who had a life of contantly going out to work each weekday and then returning to their home day and day, week after week, month after month etc. IF they were still fortunate enough to have a job'. This must have struck a chord with Prince Charles, because he never whinged again like that in public.

I think those of us who 'feel sorry for the BRF because of their work' sometimes forget that royal duties are instead of not in addition to the sort of work and lifestyle that makes up our own lot! I've got some work to do later today and also have/ had to factor in rushing into Windsor to do a bit of shopping, picking up the children from school, taking my car in for a service and cooking tonight's dinner. Rushing off to undetake a Royal Duty on top of all that - e.g. opening a ward at our local hospital - would be tricky to schedule, but then of course, if I were Royal, I would not have had to worry about all the domestic tasks I have to perform. If you see what I mean!

Alex

 

[Lumutqueen]

All the time, the royals treat becoming King/Queen like it's some massive martyrdom.

I don't know why royals are so miserable about being royalty. Unlike their ancestors they don't have to make decisions that will affect millions of lives, they don't have to accurately conduct war, they don't have to plot strategies to increase trade, and they don't have to even marry other royals or aristocrats. I don't know why they think their lifestyles are so controlled, as opposed to how their ancestors lived.

I completely disagree with what you're saying. Could you point out how the royals have treated their lives like some 'massive martyrdom'?

Unlike their ancestors, they now have nothing to do with the day to day running of their own country - that makes life IMO a lot harder because to the public, they simply spend the taxpayers money and cut a few ribbons every year. Ancestors of old didn't face criticism like, they were worshipped like gods. King and Queens of old had it easy compared to the modern ways of life. Their lifestyles are controlled by the public, if the royal family are seen to be partying all year round, skiing, hunting, shopping an the like there would be outrcries every where because they are not representing their country. Yet when they do represent their countries, they are accused of simply 'ribbon cutting'. Currently, there is an on going battle about Prince Caril-Philips choice of girlfriend, if the royals weren't controlled. The battle would not be occuring and Sofia would be free to marry CP if he chooses. Complete opposite to the old days, when a King or Queen could marry whoever they liked, a King had more freedom than a Queen. Look at Henry VIII, he married one royal then went on to marry four commoners and he never recieved any complaints.

It's not like they have to stay on palace grounds only and that they are restricted from meeting other people their age, aside from say, ladies in waiting. They go to school with their peers, they go to work, they get to jet set, they see more of the world than most will in a lifetime, and they have no real responsibilities other than to throw a well put together banquet and look decent.

They get to 'jet set' don't make me laugh, when was the last time you saw QEII holiday outside of Balmoral? They fly around the world, on official business. I wouldn't call that jet setting. I'm sorry but, when has any royal complained about these things? I have never heard anyone say that they cannot meet people their own age, moaned about their education (which btw, they choose themselves).

The fact that they have no real responsibilities is the problem, they are two steps away from being an ordinary person which is a problem those ancestors you speak of NEVER faced. If you think personally think royals do nothing more than throw a banquet and dress nicely, why are you even on this forum?

They don't have to even be moral. They screech about how 'their lives are not their own,' while at the same time, running the lives of their staff/courtiers.

At what point do they let themselves be happy and truly enjoy the life they have?

They don't even have to be moral, oh my god how wrong you are. They are human beings after all, and when was the last time you saw a royal being 'immoral'? Please enlighten me? They screech do they? I haven't heard anyone screech in a while?

The people who work in royal palaces all over the world, choose to be there. They are not forced, they are not slaves. They get paid to do a job, they have chosen to do. If they don't like their job, they can leave. Simple as. Many people in palaces are actually volunteers.

I'm sure every royal enjoys the life they have to the extent that it can be enjoyed. If they had a problem, there is a very simple solution I believe.

 

[EmpressRouge]

A very interesting and informative video about the costs of the monarchy
The True Cost of the Royal Family Explained - YouTube

 

[KittyAtlanta]

Thank you for posting the video above. I also enjoyed the other videos by the same producer.

 

[AristoCat]

the Romanovs and French royals were in a cage, with the Romanovs facing REAL assassination attempts, but they still enjoyed their role and did their duties and lived up to them. Destiny and life isn't fair and never has been; instead of looking at what you don't have, they should look at what they DO have. They obviously aren't realizing that. They constantly want more and mor and mor and more out of their people and family and go figure, ask for a bit more on the side.

All the time, it's the old fashioned "My life isn't my own, WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" complaint that is supposed to let them marry women that US politicains wouldn't dream of bringing home to mother/father, they jet set more than most entertainers even, and their wives keep messing up their role and constantly look inappropriate for their role and the occasions.

It's a total infection; I mean, movies propagandize how evil it would be to marry another royal, the only happiness that exists is shirking your duty, humiliating your (royal) intended, and that it's cute to make a fool of yourself at an age when you should be past childish antics. It's tiring seeing young royal adults make a public committment and then end up shirking it, humiliating someone literally in the eyes of the world, seeing them act up, bring trouble, and hearing the usual "we don't belong to ourselves" and seeing them get away with all sorts of things.

It's a complete lack of respecting boundaries and a lack of simply letting themselves be happy. They should be happy with their life and not push themselves to change the world. Duty is the price of rewards and it's not like the duties themselves are too onerous.

They are by birth in a cage, but a very comfortable one and they also have it all going for them at birth to launch themselves to do great things. The Japanese royals have their own interests and pursuits and it's not like they have it easy. If for one, FOR ONCE royals would take a look at all they have, they would likely realize and appreciate all they had.

It's always an annoying irony that so many of these commoner women go for the prince, do whatever it takes to get the ring and then the wedding, and then start moaning and groaning and then withering before our very eyes because they can't stand the protocol, staying by their husband, walking two steps behind, being 'reduced' to being ornamental, and being 'forced' to pop out babies and 'breed' heirs and spend time at 'stuffy' banquets and 'boring' receptions, and standing at attention at 'long' parades and doing constant 'tours,' as if for some sick reason, they didn't have any choice in the matter. They go after the ring, enjoy the perks, but at the same time, balk at paying the small price of serving the public and making an effort to appreciate the institution that they've married into. I mean, these days you can find out exactly what to expect if you marry in.

Complaining about being royalty seems to come from the West more than the East. The Romanovs revelled in being royalty, as their lifestyle showed and until Alexandra, each and every single Tsarina who was Consort adored their role and partied and socialized and were happily the leaders of fashionable Court society. Then other Eastern royals loved every bit of their status and in some aspects literally killed each other to get to the role of Sovereign. You don't see the Saudis complaining about being royalty, they love it and make no bones about enjoying themselves. I think the reason that there has been success is because the royals go out and enjoy their role and life as royalty. The problems keep popping up once the royals for some reason look at their opportunity as a burden, rather than something to really enjoy.

Fergie, for all of her faults, clearly enjoyed being royalty and enjoyed the gowns, jewels, and the balls.

I cannot feel sorry for people who cannot see the debit in their life and see how much more they have than what they really sacrifice. Serving the nation from the perch of such security is a huge privilege. They don't have to run for reelection, they don't have to really do anything too strenuous, and they don't have to worry about bills. There is a bit of sympathy for born royals, but as the Romanovs have shown, there's a lot of fun in being royalty if you know how to adjust and make things work in your favor and even enjoy public duties and life.

 

[BeatrixFan]

the Romanovs and French royals were in a cage, with the Romanovs facing REAL assassination attempts, but they still enjoyed their role and did their duties and lived up to them. Destiny and life isn't fair and never has been; instead of looking at what you don't have, they should look at what they DO have. They obviously aren't realizing that. They constantly want more and mor and mor and more out of their people and family and go figure, ask for a bit more on the side.

I think your view of royalty is a little one sided AristoCat. Every royal house is different and every monarch is different, so to make quite sweeping statements stunts the debate a little. For example, the Romanovs didn't enjoy their role all of the time, they didn't do their duty every time it was expected - just as commoners don't always do their job to the best of their ability all of the time. I've never heard any monarch ask for "more and more".

All the time, it's the old fashioned "My life isn't my own, WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" complaint that is supposed to let them marry women that US politicains wouldn't dream of bringing home to mother/father, they jet set more than most entertainers even, and their wives keep messing up their role and constantly look inappropriate for their role and the occasions.

Again, when has that ever been said? There's only one example I can think of over the past 100 years and that was Prince Henrik of Denmark when he had a mini flip-out over his lack of position in the Danish Court. Monarchy isn't about how people look, how they dress etc - it's how they fit into society and what they bring to the table.

It's always an annoying irony that so many of these commoner women go for the prince, do whatever it takes to get the ring and then the wedding, and then start moaning and groaning and then withering before our very eyes because they can't stand the protocol, staying by their husband, walking two steps behind, being 'reduced' to being ornamental, and being 'forced' to pop out babies and 'breed' heirs and spend time at 'stuffy' banquets and 'boring' receptions, and standing at attention at 'long' parades and doing constant 'tours,' as if for some sick reason, they didn't have any choice in the matter. They go after the ring, enjoy the perks, but at the same time, balk at paying the small price of serving the public and making an effort to appreciate the institution that they've married into. I mean, these days you can find out exactly what to expect if you marry in.

Who? Where? I can't think of a recent example of this at all. I think you're being a little dramatic. I don't see where this comes from...

 

[Lumutqueen]

All the time, it's the old fashioned "My life isn't my own, WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" complaint that is supposed to let them marry women that US politicains wouldn't dream of bringing home to mother/father, they jet set more than most entertainers even, and their wives keep messing up their role and constantly look inappropriate for their role and the occasions.

All the time - could you actually prove that?

It's a total infection; I mean, movies propagandize how evil it would be to marry another royal, the only happiness that exists is shirking your duty, humiliating your (royal) intended, and that it's cute to make a fool of yourself at an age when you should be past childish antics. It's tiring seeing young royal adults make a public committment and then end up shirking it, humiliating someone literally in the eyes of the world, seeing them act up, bring trouble, and hearing the usual "we don't belong to ourselves" and seeing them get away with all sorts of things.

What does this have to do with martyrdom?

It's a complete lack of respecting boundaries and a lack of simply letting themselves be happy. They should be happy with their life and not push themselves to change the world. Duty is the price of rewards and it's not like the duties themselves are too onerous.

How do you know they aren't happy? Or is it your opinion and you're stating it as fact?

If for one, FOR ONCE royals would take a look at all they have, they would likely realize and appreciate all they had.

I'm sure they do, you don't know they don't, or do you?

It's always an annoying irony that so many of these commoner women go for the prince, do whatever it takes to get the ring and then the wedding, and then start moaning and groaning and then withering before our very eyes because they can't stand the protocol, staying by their husband, walking two steps behind, being 'reduced' to being ornamental, and being 'forced' to pop out babies and 'breed' heirs and spend time at 'stuffy' banquets and 'boring' receptions, and standing at attention at 'long' parades and doing constant 'tours,' as if for some sick reason, they didn't have any choice in the matter. They go after the ring, enjoy the perks, but at the same time, balk at paying the small price of serving the public and making an effort to appreciate the institution that they've married into. I mean, these days you can find out exactly what to expect if you marry in.

Moaning, groaning and withering? Please show me where this is happening? Because I see Letizia, Mette-Marit, Mary, Daniel, Mathile, Catherine, Charlene and the like enjoying their life and respectively motherhood. You might see things differently to me. What does this have to do with your martyrdom theory again? Because basically you're just moaning on behalf of some people who are apparently moaning to you personally.

You don't see the Saudis complaining about being royalty, they love it and make no bones about enjoying themselves. I think the reason that there has been success is because the royals go out and enjoy their role and life as royalty. The problems keep popping up once the royals for some reason look at their opportunity as a burden, rather than something to really enjoy.

I think they have success because their countries are run completely differently to how the european countries are controlled. You're comparing ketchup with mayonaise, which is a bit silly. Got out and enjoy their roles? More like go out, smile with all their gold and riches, then go home to their palaces. Unlike Europe, Arab countries seem to have little to complain about so having a royal family that spends, spends, spends doesn't bother them because the ordinary people are doing exactly the same.

Fergie, for all of her faults, clearly enjoyed being royalty and enjoyed the gowns, jewels, and the balls.

Oh yes, she clearly enjoyed all her perks and moaned and groaned when she actually had to do something, a true commoner there.

I cannot feel sorry for people who cannot see the debit in their life and see how much more they have than what they really sacrifice. Serving the nation from the perch of such security is a huge privilege. They don't have to run for reelection, they don't have to really do anything too strenuous, and they don't have to worry about bills. There is a bit of sympathy for born royals, but as the Romanovs have shown, there's a lot of fun in being royalty if you know how to adjust and make things work in your favor and even enjoy public duties and life.

Well then don't feel sorry for them, it's quite simple. You're comparing the modern days royals to the romanovs, again totally different ball game. But I suppose, you're trying to back up your point. Somehow.

Also, could you answer my questions from this post this time?

 

[Elly C]

"Never complain, never explain" was, I believe, the QM's motto. Sound advice for any Royal if they are to avoid comments such as contained in this thread.

 

[Aliza]

"Never complain, never explain" was, I believe, the QM's motto. Sound advice for any Royal if they are to avoid comments such as contained in this thread.

I've also read the Queen herself uses this quote and it has been used by many BRF members since Victorian times. (It was originally from Bejamin Disraeli, when he gave advice to new MPs.) I also think that is sound advice for any Royal, but it's probably easier said than done, especially for those who marry into Royalty rather than being born Royal.

I can understand completely why so many Royals are not happy with the "job" they were born into. I can't think of anything more unpleasant than to live my life always knowing my schedule for months and years ahead, let alone having to accept guidance from private secretaries and courtiers. Sarah Feguson is a perfect example of one who ignored the courtiers and was "just herself" and look what a mess she created for herself and the BRF!

I just can't imagine how William, for example, felt when he realised that unlike every other little boy in the UK, he couldn't decide what he "wanted to be when he grew up". Talk about an isolating experience! We all know the Queen wanted to be a lady living in the country with lots of dogs and horses; instead she's now in her middle eighties and is still performing full duties and has her life centred around London and State formality. Princess Margaret, IMHO said it best upon learning "Lilibet" was going to be Queen, someday. "Poor you!" was her instant response.

Another consideration is how the family does have a nice sum of private money so they would still be able to do what they enjoy most and maintain much of their preferred lifestyle, such as at Balmoral. Well, I'm sure everyone sees this issue differently, and that's what makes life interesting.

 

[MARG]

the Romanovs and French royals were in a cage, with the Romanovs facing REAL assassination attempts, but they still enjoyed their role and did their duties and lived up to them. Destiny and life isn't fair and never has been; instead of looking at what you don't have, they should look at what they DO have. They obviously aren't realizing that. They constantly want more and mor and mor and more out of their people and family and go figure, ask for a bit more on the side.

All the time, it's the old fashioned "My life isn't my own, WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" complaint that is supposed to let them marry women that US politicains wouldn't dream of bringing home to mother/father, they jet set more than most entertainers even, and their wives keep messing up their role and constantly look inappropriate for their role and the occasions.

It's a total infection; I mean, movies propagandize how evil it would be to marry another royal, the only happiness that exists is shirking your duty, humiliating your (royal) intended, and that it's cute to make a fool of yourself at an age when you should be past childish antics. It's tiring seeing young royal adults make a public committment and then end up shirking it, humiliating someone literally in the eyes of the world, seeing them act up, bring trouble, and hearing the usual "we don't belong to ourselves" and seeing them get away with all sorts of things.

It's a complete lack of respecting boundaries and a lack of simply letting themselves be happy. They should be happy with their life and not push themselves to change the world. Duty is the price of rewards and it's not like the duties themselves are too onerous.

They are by birth in a cage, but a very comfortable one and they also have it all going for them at birth to launch themselves to do great things. The Japanese royals have their own interests and pursuits and it's not like they have it easy. If for one, FOR ONCE royals would take a look at all they have, they would likely realize and appreciate all they had.

It's always an annoying irony that so many of these commoner women go for the prince, do whatever it takes to get the ring and then the wedding, and then start moaning and groaning and then withering before our very eyes because they can't stand the protocol, staying by their husband, walking two steps behind, being 'reduced' to being ornamental, and being 'forced' to pop out babies and 'breed' heirs and spend time at 'stuffy' banquets and 'boring' receptions, and standing at attention at 'long' parades and doing constant 'tours,' as if for some sick reason, they didn't have any choice in the matter. They go after the ring, enjoy the perks, but at the same time, balk at paying the small price of serving the public and making an effort to appreciate the institution that they've married into. I mean, these days you can find out exactly what to expect if you marry in.

Complaining about being royalty seems to come from the West more than the East. The Romanovs revelled in being royalty, as their lifestyle showed and until Alexandra, each and every single Tsarina who was Consort adored their role and partied and socialized and were happily the leaders of fashionable Court society. Then other Eastern royals loved every bit of their status and in some aspects literally killed each other to get to the role of Sovereign. You don't see the Saudis complaining about being royalty, they love it and make no bones about enjoying themselves. I think the reason that there has been success is because the royals go out and enjoy their role and life as royalty. The problems keep popping up once the royals for some reason look at their opportunity as a burden, rather than something to really enjoy.

Fergie, for all of her faults, clearly enjoyed being royalty and enjoyed the gowns, jewels, and the balls.

I cannot feel sorry for people who cannot see the debit in their life and see how much more they have than what they really sacrifice. Serving the nation from the perch of such security is a huge privilege. They don't have to run for reelection, they don't have to really do anything too strenuous, and they don't have to worry about bills. There is a bit of sympathy for born royals, but as the Romanovs have shown, there's a lot of fun in being royalty if you know how to adjust and make things work in your favor and even enjoy public duties and life.

Having read your amazing diatribe of vitriol I cannot find any credible reference or evidence to back up virtually anything in this post here in the year of our Lord, 2011. And so I am left wondering . . . . . . . precisely which dimension or planet in the Universe do you presently inhabit as it certainly bears little resemblance to Earth in the Third Millenium!

 

[American Dane]

I completely disagree with what you're saying. Could you point out how the royals have treated their lives like some 'massive martyrdom'?

Unlike their ancestors, they now have nothing to do with the day to day running of their own country - that makes life IMO a lot harder because to the public, they simply spend the taxpayers money and cut a few ribbons every year. Ancestors of old didn't face criticism like, they were worshipped like gods. King and Queens of old had it easy compared to the modern ways of life. Their lifestyles are controlled by the public, if the royal family are seen to be partying all year round, skiing, hunting, shopping an the like there would be outrcries every where because they are not representing their country. Yet when they do represent their countries, they are accused of simply 'ribbon cutting'. Currently, there is an on going battle about Prince Caril-Philips choice of girlfriend, if the royals weren't controlled. The battle would not be occuring and Sofia would be free to marry CP if he chooses. Complete opposite to the old days, when a King or Queen could marry whoever they liked, a King had more freedom than a Queen. Look at Henry VIII, he married one royal then went on to marry four commoners and he never recieved any complaints. (**)

They get to 'jet set' don't make me laugh, when was the last time you saw QEII holiday outside of Balmoral? They fly around the world, on official business. I wouldn't call that jet setting. I'm sorry but, when has any royal complained about these things? I have never heard anyone say that they cannot meet people their own age, moaned about their education (which btw, they choose themselves).

The fact that they have no real responsibilities is the problem, they are two steps away from being an ordinary person which is a problem those ancestors you speak of NEVER faced. If you think personally think royals do nothing more than throw a banquet and dress nicely, why are you even on this forum?

They don't even have to be moral, oh my god how wrong you are. They are human beings after all, and when was the last time you saw a royal being 'immoral'? Please enlighten me? They screech do they? I haven't heard anyone screech in a while?

The people who work in royal palaces all over the world, choose to be there. They are not forced, they are not slaves. They get paid to do a job, they have chosen to do. If they don't like their job, they can leave. Simple as. Many people in palaces are actually volunteers.

I'm sure every royal enjoys the life they have to the extent that it can be enjoyed. If they had a problem, there is a very simple solution I believe.

I would just like to add onto Lumetqueen's argument that royals of today have to be politically neutral unlike their ancestors who could flip-flop based on their rival having more mistresses or losing wrestling matches (COUGH Henry VIII COUGH). I can't imagine not being able to voice my point of view on a government policy that affects my fellow countrymen. Remember, royals are citizens too and they are being denied a basic right.

**Actually Henry VIII received a lot of opposition to his marriage of Anne Boleyn but that had more to do with Henry leaving Catherine of Aragon and breaking with the Church, than Anne herself

 

[Bensgal]

Being a member of a royal family would be exceptionally difficult job, IMO, and I can't imagine thinking otherwise.

 

[blauerengel]

This is a really interesting thread, I read all of the posts above, it is very interesting to see a real discussion going on (not like in other threads were posters of different opinions "shout" at each other or discredit members who hold different political views or outlooks on life/morals/ethic values etc.) There are some royals who were really hunted down by the paparazzi-I just think of Princess Diana-even before she got engaged the press was writing about her and following every single step,already proclaiming her the next queen-which may have also lead to this hurried decision of marriage (I know that it´s a little bit off topic,but I believe it is absolutely vital for a successful marriage that you know each other for a longer time!)which caused so much damage for the public image of the BRF and disappointment for all the people involved. It seems like the British RF is more in the gossip papers than any other royal family-I don´t count articles,pictures or interviews but they seem to be in every media...So while there are some individuals that have suffered from the media attention they generated (and sometimes also encouraged)I also see many royals who live a very pleasant life!They can choose their friends as they like,go to normal schools and live like average citizens of their country-which is very different from the royal lifes of earlier decades where every decision in the life of a prince/princess had to be approved,they were teached at home and they could only play or go out with "the right" society (who had to be either very rich,influental,sophisticated or of royal blood)...Nowadays each dinasty tries to be seen as modern and down-to-earth because they are afraid that they are going to be exchanged for elected presidents and politicians.I see this as a good chance for royalty-they have to show that they are worth their money and therefore do good work,a lot of charity and behave well at official events (and also show decency and good manners in private - no more scandals and thoughtless spending or rough manners if possible)and thus represent their country in a positive way. It also allows more commoners to marry into dinastic families-who of course also need to share certain values and bring a good working spirit (pleasant looks are also of advantage)
While they still drive very nice cars,live in beautiful houses,wear designer clothes and go on vacation to luxurious destinations they have to live up to the expectations of the taxpayers!!! They do get harsh critisism if they do anything wrong (wardrobe malfunctions or too expensive clothes,bad behaviour like saying nasty things,being cought with too much alcohol or in a nighclub,hitting your dog or abusing your staff,using taxpayers money for visiting your girlfriend with a helicopter etc.)
I guess this new situation is challenging and maybe even quite difficult for the royals who grew up in a more authoritarian and less democratic era where the king and the queen held more power and the subjects had less to say...and maybe this is why they see themselves as martyrs-they do enjoy the royal lifestyle but they don´t want to pay the price for it!(It´s a little bit like when you want to own something that is nor really in your budget & you can´t live without it but you are not willing to make any sacrifice for it...while you are able to make a decision to either be a slave of your own desire and work extra hours to afford XY or live without XY and having a less glamourous life,royals don´t chose the family they are born in and they also don´t decide to be in the center of attention even before they are born,only when they grow older & more mature they can decide to be independent or devote their life to serving their country ) Commoners who marry into RF seem to understand this very well-most of the new princesses and princes are working hard on their public image,style and appearance and fulfil a lot of royal duties.Sometimes it even seems as if they were doing more than the "real royals"- like Queen Silvia in Sweden,she is very disciplined and involved while I am not sure what I should think of her husband and his attitude
I think Prince Charles is a very intelligent,hard-working person and he supports many environmental issues and the organic movement but IMO he has inherited a lot of his fathers character-he can be quite cinycal and worrysome or speak out his mind even (or especially) if he knows that someone else will be appaled or disgrantled It could be that he likes to create a little bit of excitement and uproar to get attention from the press and/or from the people close to him.What I know he didn´t have a very happy childhood, he couldn´t spend much time with his mother and he didn´t have many people he could confide in-which would explain his introverted nature and difficulty to maintain close romantic relationships with women-and when Diana came he was again in the background because she was far more beautiful,funny and easy-going and everyone loved her and didn´t want to talk to this sad-looking, intellectual guy who was more difficult to have a conversation with->so again he was overlooked and didn´t get the attention,approval and positive feedback he deserved and only Camilla was there to support him while he was scrutinized by the press for what Diana told about him...Some even accused him (and the BRF) that they had planned to muder her-anyone who has ever been accused of something they haven´t done will know that this is very though and hurtful when even your closest friends question your integrity and you think the whole world has turned against you This could also be one of the explanations why Prince Charles feels like a martyr,but I don´t know,I am really interested what you think about the whole thing because I don´t know if it makes any sense at all...

 

[COUNTESS]

Life is like a sewer, you get out of it, what you put inot it. Charles and some other royals think they are above the fray, that time has expired. If he wanted Camilla, fine. Don't ruin any one elese's life in the interim. Don't swear to "love, cherish etc, when you have a party in another "town". Royals don't suffer, they are in the public eye and they reap great rewards, because of it. If you "can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen". If you take more than you earn, cutting ribbons is not a job, than smile and take what you get.

 

[AristoCat]

Never complain, never explain" was, I believe, the QM's motto. Sound advice for any Royal if they are to avoid comments such as contained in this thread.

Rightly if I may add.

 

[blauerengel]

Good motto!"Never complain, never explain" is a very wise thing to do for any VIP.I believe that if you put yourself in the spotlight you have to accept that others may critisize or laugh about you,but being in a special position like a royal also means that you have the chance to share your believes with a large group of people and therefore influence the world around you and if you are good and persuasive even change their mind on certain topics.One of my hobbies is to psycho-analyse everyone and everything,trying to understand why people live and act as they do....

 

[JaneEyre]

At what point do they let themselves be happy and truly enjoy the life they have?

Royal or not, we are all responsible for finding our own happiness.

I try to stick with the "never complain, never explain" philosophy. I believe I am generally a happy person.

 

[XeniaCasaraghi]

Doesn't everybody complain about their job no matter what that job is? I have to assume that even the person who has their dream job has to find things bad about it.
I have always said that the BRF are nothing more than overpaid pageant queens(kings) whose only responsibility is to wave and cut a ribbon. Perhaps the hardships of being a royal are not the same as they were in the 16th century, but they are still hardships. Having to abstain from having an opinion about what is going in your own country, for all of your life having to walk an insane tight rope between: appearing royal, but not appearing too royal so as to offend the public. Having to represent your country, but being criticized for spending money buying clothes to represent your country. Take, for example, the criticism the Queen of England took following Diana's death for things that were not her fault, following protocol as well as protecting her grandson's and she gets criticized for it and as some have said, bullied by the mob to make them feel better.
Perhaps because these royals are essentially kind of pointless, what their jobs are is constantly changing and seeing as how their jobs are also their lives, it could be grating on the nerves.

 

[nascarlucy]

Sometimes I think royals are more criticized about their jobs than other leaders (example, PM or President). Someone doesn't like something they did or said or someone didn't like the outfit they wore (usually woman are the ones criticized for their outfits). Or didn't think they should have gone on a trip, etc. I would guess if a royal worried about this all the time they would go nuts.

Appearance are more important to royals than anything else. The last thing a royal would want to do would be to make their family look bad or make themselves look bad.

I imagine like anyone else there are days that royals don't like their job, or just want to be left alone for a while.